Rain Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 What keeps you from doing service? Please don't tell me time. We all have the same amount of time, but some make service a priority and some don't. I'm not saying that work and family are not good prorities. I actually think they are very important priorities. I also think there are times in our lives when we should have priorities for some things and not for others. So I'm not asking what keeps you from doing service right now, I'm asking what keeps you from it in general.
Jeanne Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Rain....I have work..I have Dad...but I also have no excuses. I am shamed.. At work in the mornings...early...I have a middle aged man..who is homeless who sits outside on a bench at the store...don't know what to do...in fact, the store is probably ready to call the cops...I had a chance to do that when a cop pulled up and in my mind ..thinking..hey, maybe they could help. I didn't say anything though..for fear that they would just make him move. I dunno...but serving others is all around us...it is in a sense turning out backs on the Savior..I need to do more so thanks for the reminder. 1
bluebell Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Time. More specifically, I have very little time each week that I can be outside of my home doing service. I have four kids all at stages of life where they need me constantly. I can't leave the house unless someone is home with my youngest two, and my husband works roughly 60+ hours every week and then has a calling that asks him to devote hours each week outside the home serving the men in the ward. I have a calling that also asks me to devote multiple hours every week outside the home serving the youth of the church. So, between the hours of 7 am-9 pm every day, I have 2 hours on every other thursday night and an occasional friday night that's not already scheduled and I could leave the house to serve. And to be honest, I really enjoy just being able to be at home doing nothing on those two nights when i get the chance. I have lots of time during the day when I'm in my home (as my participation on here suggests!) but most service can't be done from my home. I did a lot of indexing last year in order to fit some service in during the day and enjoyed that. I haven't found much beyond that as an option. In general though, i think that a lot of what keeps me from doing service is not knowing what to do. A lot of the things that women typically do to serve are things that I would rather get a cavity filled than actually do (such as making someone food, watching kids, or sewing something) and though i do them when asked, i don't seek those opportunities out. 1
ksfisher Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Again time. If we're counting time spent on our calling as different than service: in the past 8 days I'd estimate that I've spent 32 hours on my calling. With time spent at work, with my wife and children, and work that needs to be done around that house that doesn't leave a lot of time for other service. 1
JAHS Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Most of us are creatures of routine. Once we have a routine set up in our lives it's hard to divert from it to think about doing something out of the routine, like an act of service. We need to be more flexible so we can be more spontaneous and respond when the service opportunity arises. Beside that we (I) just need to get up off our lazy butts and do something. 4
Rain Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 36 minutes ago, Jeanne said: Rain....I have work..I have Dad...but I also have no excuses. I am shamed.. At work in the mornings...early...I have a middle aged man..who is homeless who sits outside on a bench at the store...don't know what to do...in fact, the store is probably ready to call the cops...I had a chance to do that when a cop pulled up and in my mind ..thinking..hey, maybe they could help. I didn't say anything though..for fear that they would just make him move. I dunno...but serving others is all around us...it is in a sense turning out backs on the Savior..I need to do more so thanks for the reminder. My brother is an addict, alcoholic and homeless. Because of that I don't like to give people money, in case that is what put them there. I don't judge that they are addicts, just know that you cannot always tell so I don't want to contribute to it just in case. However, I heard once someone saying that when people see a homeless person or a beggar they look away. They pretend that the person isn't there. That changed things for me. I may not give the person money, but that doesn't mean I need to ignore their existence. I can wave to them. Or smile at them or talk with them. Maybe that is something you can do with this man? 2
Rain Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 30 minutes ago, bluebell said: Time. More specifically, I have very little time each week that I can be outside of my home doing service. I have four kids all at stages of life where they need me constantly. I can't leave the house unless someone is home with my youngest two, and my husband works roughly 60+ hours every week and then has a calling that asks him to devote hours each week outside the home serving the men in the ward. I have a calling that also asks me to devote multiple hours every week outside the home serving the youth of the church. So, between the hours of 7 am-9 pm every day, I have 2 hours on every other thursday night and an occasional friday night that's not already scheduled and I could leave the house to serve. And to be honest, I really enjoy just being able to be at home doing nothing on those two nights when i get the chance. I have lots of time during the day when I'm in my home (as my participation on here suggests!) but most service can't be done from my home. I did a lot of indexing last year in order to fit some service in during the day and enjoyed that. I haven't found much beyond that as an option. In general though, i think that a lot of what keeps me from doing service is not knowing what to do. A lot of the things that women typically do to serve are things that I would rather get a cavity filled than actually do (such as making someone food, watching kids, or sewing something) and though i do them when asked, i don't seek those opportunities out. This was one of the things I was wondering about. 10 minutes ago, JAHS said: Most of us are creatures of routine. Once we have a routine set up in our lives it's hard to divert from it to think about doing something out of the routine, like an act of service. We need to be more flexible so we can be more spontaneous and respond when the service opportunity arises. Beside that we (I) just need to get up off our lazy butts and do something. Huh. Hadn't considered that at all. the routine thing. Makes perfect sense. Thanks.
Calm Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Energy, physical and emotional. I have plenty of time. Too much in fact. I need to find something that engages the brain enough the physical distractions won't bother me and is stimulating like the board, but less negativity so I don't waste emotion on unnecessary irritations, but that i can do in a reclining position.
Duncan Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 I do service, I volunteer at a soup kitchen every month, do the yearly harvest food collection with our Stake. You know what they say about service don't you? service is like wetting your pants, everyone can see it but only you can feel of it's warmth 3
Jeanne Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 36 minutes ago, Rain said: My brother is an addict, alcoholic and homeless. Because of that I don't like to give people money, in case that is what put them there. I don't judge that they are addicts, just know that you cannot always tell so I don't want to contribute to it just in case. However, I heard once someone saying that when people see a homeless person or a beggar they look away. They pretend that the person isn't there. That changed things for me. I may not give the person money, but that doesn't mean I need to ignore their existence. I can wave to them. Or smile at them or talk with them. Maybe that is something you can do with this man? Thank you, Rain. You know..when I first see him in the morning..I have just made doughnuts...turnovers..and artisan breads ...I want to bring something to him..so.o.o bad...but he needs a different kind of help and i know that he cannot stay there for long. I am going to pray about this....and really do something. I wish your brother well...that someday there is a home in his heart for help...and a home that he can belong again to himself and true. God bless you. 2
Jeanne Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 46 minutes ago, JAHS said: Most of us are creatures of routine. Once we have a routine set up in our lives it's hard to divert from it to think about doing something out of the routine, like an act of service. We need to be more flexible so we can be more spontaneous and respond when the service opportunity arises. Beside that we (I) just need to get up off our lazy butts and do something. Oh man...this is so true...just try and mess up my little schedule in life and I find chaos!
mnn727 Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 (edited) Quote What keeps you from doing service? 2 back surgeries that leaves me only able to walk short distances and only with a cane, also not being able to sit for long periods of time, also not allowed to lift more than 15# at this time. The 3 hour block is a killer, I have to get up and move around every 30 minutes or so or I just freeze up. In sacrament and in classes I try to sit right next to the door so I can get up and move around without disturbing people too much. Physically I am currently a wreck and its taking forever to make progress, even with Physical Therapy. Of course if you saw how I was last year, you'd think I was a totally new man (I was pretty much confined to bed or my recliner and got around with a wheelchair or walker - so since I'm up to a cane now I am doing better) Other than that, not a thing. Edited October 16, 2017 by mnn727 Kant spel rite 2
Rain Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 1 hour ago, Jeanne said: Thank you, Rain. You know..when I first see him in the morning..I have just made doughnuts...turnovers..and artisan breads ...I want to bring something to him..so.o.o bad...but he needs a different kind of help and i know that he cannot stay there for long. I am going to pray about this....and really do something. I wish your brother well...that someday there is a home in his heart for help...and a home that he can belong again to himself and true. God bless you. I have to apologize. I left "often" out of what I said. My brother is often homeless, but is not currently homeless. His drug and alcohol use have broken him to the point that he is now considered disabled and is living in sort of a group home. Thank you for your thoughts about him. 2
Rain Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 I really appreciate all the answers. I've been thinking about a conference talk and trying to figure out what to do with myself concerning it and this is helping me to get understanding of what and how to go about doing what I need to do.
changed Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 (edited) I'm really lucky that my work is very service oriented - I'm a community college professor, I'm in the business of getting people the education they need to end poverty cycles. Our college is awesome, last week the faculty got together, we handed out groceries to 250 car loads of people in our parking lot. I volunteer at local middle and high schools, organize outreach events etc. The class projects we do often involve service learning - everything from making wheel-chair ramps, to building water stations for immigrants coming across the border (political views aside, there are quite a few people who die every year just south of where I live for want of water...) That said, I have mixed feelings about service - while it is possible to help people with superficial needs (getting a job, food and water etc.) I'm not convinced that it is possible to help anyone where it matters most - cannot fix marriages, cannot erase the scars of abuse, cannot bring back the dead, cannot give anyone faith - at the core, we're all on our own, we all have to solve our own problems, have to settle our own minds... Victor Frankl found peace in the middle of a concentration camp, while others cannot find it in the lap of luxury... what's inside is what counts. We can serve the "outside" of those around us, but can never quite reach the inside... Because it is impossible to heal another's heart, I'm not sure how much good service does. Keeps everyone busy at least, and can almost make you feel good - just almost. Edited October 16, 2017 by changed 1
Doctrine 612 Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 I love service, my family and I do a lot of it. the only times we don’t is because we need to take a break and take care of our own family task. then we serve again. 1
longview Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 I seem to have a congenial disposition. When I go anywhere and walk by a person, I look right in the eyes. If they notice, they smile right back at me (in a pleasant way). Makes me wonder if I have a permanent smile on my face? I try to be "brash" and help in any little thing (getting out of my comfort zone) such as assisting an elderly person with whatever they are doing. Little things are important to me, in marriage, at church, wherever. With strangers, family, projects, calls for help (out of the blue), etc. One happy memory I have is when I was walking towards the grocery store in the parking lot, I passed by a young lady. She was holding up her right hand to shield eyes from the sun. I immediately raised my hand to my brow and said: "I SALUTE YOU!" and snapped it off. A few seconds later, I heard her make a loud guffaw behind me. She finally figured out I was teasing her. 2
rodheadlee Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 4 hours ago, Jeanne said: Rain....I have work..I have Dad...but I also have no excuses. I am shamed.. At work in the mornings...early...I have a middle aged man..who is homeless who sits outside on a bench at the store...don't know what to do...in fact, the store is probably ready to call the cops...I had a chance to do that when a cop pulled up and in my mind ..thinking..hey, maybe they could help. I didn't say anything though..for fear that they would just make him move. I dunno...but serving others is all around us...it is in a sense turning out backs on the Savior..I need to do more so thanks for the reminder. Just strike up a conversation with him. They like to be treated like people, not invisible. Give him your old clothes , they freeze in the winter. Give him a couple of bucks. You used to be able to shower at a truck stop for 3 bucks, I heard it's up to 12. When I was younger I would bring them home and offer them a job. 1
Tacenda Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 1 hour ago, Rain said: I really appreciate all the answers. I've been thinking about a conference talk and trying to figure out what to do with myself concerning it and this is helping me to get understanding of what and how to go about doing what I need to do. Was it you that talked about JustServe.org before on this board? I think I read somewhere on this board about it. From there I found several places to serve. So far just serving once a week at a hospital. I tried the humane society in my town to see if I could walk the animals but they weren't taking any new people at the moment. There is so much out there I'm amazed. I need to do way more, and not make any excuses since I'm sure I have a lot more time than most. Thanks for the thread to help remind me.
Jeanne Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 4 hours ago, mnn727 said: 2 back surgeries that leaves me only able to walk short distances and only with a cane, also not being able to sit for long periods of time, also not allowed to lift more than 15# at this time. The 3 hour block is a killer, I have to get up and move around every 30 minutes or so or I just freeze up. In sacrament and in classes I try to sit right next to the door so I can get up and move around without disturbing people too much. Physically I am currently a wreck and its taking forever to make progress, even with Physical Therapy. Of course if you saw how I was last year, you'd think I was a totally new man (I was pretty much confined to bed or my recliner and got around with a wheelchair or walker - so since I'm up to a cane now I am doing better) Other than that, not a thing. Wow....you are servicing others by being an inspiration.
Jeanne Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 1 hour ago, rodheadlee said: Just strike up a conversation with him. They like to be treated like people, not invisible. Give him your old clothes , they freeze in the winter. Give him a couple of bucks. You used to be able to shower at a truck stop for 3 bucks, I heard it's up to 12. When I was younger I would bring them home and offer them a job. I like this...just nervous I guess...but maybe I will try this. Thanks 1
The Nehor Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Biggest obstacle is there are usually much more fun things to do. 1
BlueDreams Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 Honestly, I feel like my job is a form of service and the idea of serving more often makes me feel tired unless that service entails minimal human interaction. Plus the inconsistency of my schedule can make it hard to work around service oppurtunities. I went to, the JustServe website wanting to do more. And the ones I most qualified for sounded like an extension of my job. There were a few others that I could have probably done...it just didn't seem the right season in my life for them. Oh, and time. Like everyone else. Probably a little selfishness in there too. With luv, BD 2
Duncan Posted October 16, 2017 Posted October 16, 2017 one thing people can do is feed the missionaries!!!! they'll eat pretty much anything! even dandelions, shredded carrots and spam salad or money, they take money 1
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