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Everything posted by BlueDreams

  1. Haven't read the thread. So I'm sure someone will say something otherwise. I think it depends on how you raise the kids. Some parent support autonomy moreso than others....insomuch that if that child was 14, I'd still question how much it was their decisions. Heck I knew someone whose mother was super controlling and I questioned her autonomous decision making well into her 20's. When families support and foster children making informed decisions I think a child can make a decision at 8. Does that mean he/she will know exactly what that means and entail for their life? No. I don't know that fo
  2. That and most non-english countries read the Liahona already and that’s currently probably a larger Chunk of the church’s population. So why not Choose the name we’re (as a whole) most familiar with? with luv, BD
  3. I can only speak from my perspective on this. My current stance is that the start of the ban was from fallible leaders and inherently racist in both its justifications and implications. I do believe that McKay likely did get a no from God. I personally believe it had more to do with the readiness of the people and I do not see that as God necessarily promoting racism or being racist himself. Let me give a non-race related example from my life that could apply. I believe that God wants families that are seal together and with a mother and father to bring up children in love and patiencemo
  4. Utah county. no current protest for BLM for about 2 weeks i want to say. Most protests period are in salt lake area so that’s not very surprising. In my specific town there were non period....just a few messages on the side walk or on homes in support. I think there’s been a couple tiny protests surrounding mask wearing. covid numbers here started to spike like much of the state. It’s early but they seem to be plateauing recently. Each week that i’ve gone grocery shopping mask wearing has gone up as have mask mandates in individual stores. The last major store that sinply requ
  5. Yup. Last year i assumed i’d try getting pregnant this year again. With covid and our daughter’s concerns and other personal factors of not feeling fully ready for number 2 anyways, we decided to postpone till next year to try with luv, BD
  6. about the trib article on the BSU letter: I decided to take a day or two before responding to this because i found several of the responses frustrating. For one several posts looked like they were jumping to conclusions or creating strawman arguments based on the first few (slightly sensationalistic) lines. Throughout the article the two stated clearly they didn’t want to condemn former leaders, but simply have a more neutral learning environment. They specifically wanted all names removed so that a single leader wasn’t called out or defamed. I’m summarizing directly from the letter itself.
  7. Yeah, somehow we’re still disconnecting. When i say “white privilege” i am talking in large part about what had deceloped culturally abd institutionally over centuries in favor of those deemed white. I understand what’s being described. I’ve read Macintosh’s text book and largely agree with it. So something isn’t connecting. Maybe it’s the focus on solely white privilege. When talking about privilege that’s not the only form talked about. Class is talked about as well. I think the reason that white privilege is given such focus is that it’s one that often has to be proven as existing. An
  8. @pogi Sorry if this is out of order. I wrote it on my phone in pieces whenever I had a minute or two. Minus that she will likely never have thanksgiving with the peruvian side (they live in peru...and it’s not a holiday there obviously 😋), yes she’ll have direct access to a lot of different families and family cultures. But that was never my main concern. It’s more to do with the extended social and cultural experiences that she will have that i’m concerned about. That i have to work to help her have growing up. it’s quite a group i have. In my master’s we needed t
  9. First, i would state that being mixed is not the same as being black. I look significantly different than my full black siblings. I’m significantly lighter, my hair’s different, my racial identifiers can be a little bit chameleon, based on where you see me and when. Growing up in a white/mexican american family i still stood out. From time to time i’d experience the hard stare in the south. But i’ll never forget the difference of walking and interacting with one side in UT compared to with my black side. The attention and interactions were often notably different. Not all the time. But consist
  10. I responded to another post of yours and somehow missed this one when doing so. I still stand with my assertions that racial privilege and economic privilege overlap, but I would have probably changed a few things based on this context. I just want to point out a few things. There are definitely groups of people that are generally considered outside the anglo-saxon and/or white categories that tend do better in a US economy than others. That's never been in question for people who've studied these trends and patterns. What is in question is exactly WHY. And that's where it gets complicate
  11. I’ve seen a few families with these. Seems especially smart for younger kids! One of my friends is a highschool teacher and among worrying about illness, there’s just so much up in the air. Most of my friends assume at some point they’ll likely be doing online school again
  12. For the people i know who’ve Lost their faith, it usually is a culmination of experiences, thought patterns, etc that lead to the dissolution. So mask wearing by itself in either direction isn’t likely to do it. But if they’re at the end of their rope, i could see people’s attitudes toward it being a bigger trial for them than others. personally it’s a non-issue for me. When we received the news that our ward would start meeting monthly again, I had a simple spiritual experience that confirmed that it was best we stay home for a long while to come. It was both the logical and confirm
  13. Race and culture definitely overlap....and having cultural experiences that work in the US where specific european cultures dominated standard practices would definitely lead to an advantage. BUT there is a limit to this and economic success is only one measure of privilege in the US. For example my bio-dad is nigerian by birth. So he didn't have the same cultural baggage and disadvantage that black americans faced. His american journey started in his 20's and to get here, he also had to be extremely resilient and scrappy in the first place. Most of his siblings still live in Nigeria and
  14. Okay, I think I follow you one this. Though I do think this is more of a common misunderstanding of what's being said. What's usually meant is that there is a collective culture and systems in place that tend to favor one group over another both historically and currently. The historical context fed current disparities and some of the cultural and systemic practices now maintain it. And it's very likely that individuals benefit and carry things from that said legacy. This doesn't mean that I expect one specific individual to fix racism in all its forms....anymore than I think one person recycl
  15. I can get that. My (white) mom is constantly late for everything. When they’re traveling i assume they’ll start 4-6 hours later on their journey than they said. It used to drive me nuts until i just accepted that she may show up between a certain window and never expect her at your place earlier than noon when she’s visiting from out of town. But when talking about this, i think it’s meant more about the cultural value of promptness and timing. My mom’s just mom in this. But the overarching culture that is the dominant feature in american life currently values structure, time, and routines.
  16. What do you mean by collective guilt? When i talk about the underlying tone, i mean the preemptive language you’re using that assumes an attack on white people is right around the corner. I don’t know if that’s something you mean to be doing or not, but this reads from my in as at best leery or preemptively defensive. It also kinda read as if we talk about race within the parameters that i find acceptable, then it should be talked about. lastly when i mean race/ethnicity is freely talked about, I don’t mean there’s a deep dive every day or every week (minus maybe this june). I mean
  17. I'll try to respond to as much of this as I can, but one of the reasons I hesitated in responding was simply time constraints. So it may take me longer to respond to people than I would like. I haven't met anyone who isn't sincere in their beliefs about not seeing color. People are generally sincere on a number of things. But it does make it difficult to converse, because the first thing that has to be deconstructed is that colorblindness isn't necessarily a good thing all the time. And that gets people defensive. It's difficult because I need to disseminate lived experiences su
  18. Actually......several different communities maintain long standing jokes about it. Brown time, CP time, etc are really common banters. In latino communities an event almost never starts on time. It's more like, this is the time we'll get a few things ready so bring stuff then and help set up and then an hour later the real party will get going. White people aren't the only ones who focus on punctuality, but different cultures and communities have different expectations around time and dates. With luv, BD
  19. Really good (and long) analysis of the social issues tied around the pandemic response in the US. Don’t have time right now to write my thoughts past this just yet. But I particularly liked the little bit of history lesson around our previous responses to disease control: https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/14/magazine/covid-19-public-health-texas.html?action=click&module=Top Stories&pgtype=Homepage with luv, BD
  20. This goofy kid’s movie keeps coming to mind on this. In trolls 2 the pop elves become aware of the fact that other music elves exist in the world. At one point the very peppy elf queen, Poppy, talks about have them all be the same and she was gently corrected to note that they weren’t all the same and that’s a good thing, something that adds a bit of spice to life. i’m okay with the concept of colorblind in the sense that you mentioned...that you give all people common courtesy and respect. My concern is when this treatment of everybody the same inadvertently ignores important differences,
  21. There are a vocal minority of protest, yes....but from what i'm seeing, pushing masks does work in aggregate. For example in the my grocery run this week I went to three stores with varying degrees of health consciousness. At the first they just recently decided to make masks mandatory. Everyone in the store was masked. I saw one lady after very obviously throw her mask to the ground in irritation AFTER going to the store (they were giving them out to customers who didn't have one)....but everyone was wearing one. One man walked without a mask, saw the signs, returned to his car and grabbed hi
  22. a couple thoughts 1. I didn’t read let’s roll’s comment to mean that he’d expect them to talk about it right on the spot. Just moreso kindly asking if they were willing/wanting to share. If they were hypothetically *past morgan freeman in their stance then they can say basically “yeah, that’s just not what i want to talk about right now” and that’s the end of the discussion. Personally i’ve deeply appreciated the people who’ve come up and asked me how i’m doing with the events that have occurred in the last bit and genuinely ask me about my experiences. 2) there’s an assumption of te
  23. I sort of struggle with this. This smacks of mindreading. And imputing the worst of motives. What does "You can't fix something you can't see" mean in this context? How does ignoring/disregarding skin color have to do with one's "ability to appreciate individualism?" How does it "minimize the struggles of {people of color}?" What if it is an attempt by the individual to express agreement with the aspirations of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.? "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color o
  24. Good! I hope other area presidents in other high risk areas (which currently includes large Chunks of the US) do the same. I’m glad they mentioned the growing consensus among experts. I still have plenty of relatives questioning this. with luv, BD
  25. There is a really good article that discussed the discrepancy in deathrates to rising cases over all. see here The basic gist is that death rates usually start to really accrue 4-6 weeks after the infection rates rise. Like pogi, I'm concerned by both the increased hospitalization rates, which are starting to spike as well. That to me indicates that we'll likely see the death rate increase in the coming weeks. And though most of those sick currently are younger, it's a matter of time that this transmits to older and more vulnerable populations. I think it would be great if they
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