Ed Smart, father of Elizabeth Smart, Announces he is gay

[The Nehor]

2 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Once again, it's all about sex with members of this church. I hope to high heaven Papa will speak with his gay daughter about his post. I can't understand why they won't understand that it is your DNA to love the same sex. They cannot seem to understand it at all. 

Actually, they are pretty sure it is not a hard coded genetic state.

It is also not generally a conscious choice either.

Edited August 17, 2019 by The Nehor

[Kenngo1969]

On 8/16/2019 at 9:46 AM, MustardSeed said:

... Incidentally, I had a boyfriend once tell me that I would get extra points in heaven for remaining celibate before marriage because for me it was harder, being easy to look at.  He claimed that the semi beautiful people had it easier.  ...

"Ken, welcome to Heaven.  I hate to have to be the one to break this to you, though, but, sadly, you don't get any Extra Points for Lifetime Celibacy, because you're, well ... butt-ugly.  Sorry."

I think that's freaking hilarious, and I'm gonna print it out and post it on my wall.

[longview]

Kudos to Lee for his very thoughtful perspectives on the consequences of unbridled and misdirected "desires" (both heteorsexual and homosexual):

1 hour ago, Bill “Papa” Lee said:

- - - So when I said, “I Do”, I did put any and all desires on the back burner. Brother Smart, is a 64 year old Husband and Father, of five children. So (to me) that is the truth that should be his first and foremost concern. So vary (very) often, many talk about “being true, being honest to one’s self”, that whatever people do, between “contenting (consenting) adults”, is no one’s business. Having come from a broken home, but thankfully my Mother met and married a wonderful man, who gave us all his name. Besides my own personal experience of betrayal, as a Police Officer, I have seen up close and personal the tragedy that can and often does ruin many lives. I have seen the broken families, the shattered lives, and even the deaths, associated with persons who choose to make bad decisions, while giving in to their “desires”, leaving their families, and lives in shambles. I have even had to bury friends, and family as a result of placing “carnal desires”, above all else. I certainly don’t know what goes on in the lives of other people, and their marriages, but have so often been in the front or second row, to watch too many tragedies unfolding. I don’t know, I guess knowing members of Brother and Sister Smart’s Family, so closely, I am heartbroken for all, and devastated. I pray for them all, especially Brother Smart, but am I alone with the idea that Wife, Children, Grandchildren, should come before all else? Am I just too idealistic, to old to understand?

We are here in the "Vale of Tears" to endure "Boot Camp" to discover our real inclinations.  It takes real courage and serious commitment to choose God's Way over the carnal pleasures of Satan's deceptions (2 Nephi 28:20 For behold, at that day shall he rage in the hearts of the children of men, and stir them up to anger against that which is good).  I suppose having a powerful weakness or temptation can be very daunting but if we look to the Savior then He can (with the Power of His Atonement) help us overcome the world.  NO, we are NOT too old to want to faithfully embrace God's Grand Design.

2 hours ago, ALarson said:

15 hours ago, longview said:

Bro. Smart not only slimed his wife he also turned against God.  He has failed the test.

Ugh 😒

"Slimed his wife"?  

Where did he do that....do you have a quote?

Not a quote, my words.  A faithful member should expect to make a lifelong commitment (ideally) to staying true to his/her spouse and be willing to ENDURE the refining process, to draw ever closer to God and become well seasoned, more humble, willing to be meek, learn how to act (and NOT be mindlessly acted upon), being willing to always walk with God (through all heights and depths, etc).

Sis. Smart was slimed because she is now suffering the humiliation of a long time husband who no longer wishes to maintain the integrity of his marriage partnership and covenants.  But the onus is entirely on him.   She can still stay true to her own testimony and convictions.  Sadly she will no longer have the joy of having an "intact" extended family in which she could have had a husband that would faithfully work with her in their ongoing efforts to strengthen and inspire the children and grandchildren to stay close to God.

[ALarson]

13 minutes ago, longview said:

Not a quote, my words. 

Ok.  Well, I think it's best to avoid stating things such as Ed is "sliming" Lois or cheating on her or having an affair, when you (and others) have no idea that has taken place.  

 

13 minutes ago, longview said:

Sis. Smart was slimed because she is now suffering the humiliation of a long time husband who no longer wishes to maintain the integrity of his marriage partnership and covenants. 

Once again.....Lois is the one who filed for divorce.  We have not heard from her (that I'm aware of), but we have no idea if it was a mutual decision to end their marriage.  Maybe it was unhealthy for her or she was unhappy or wanted a different type of relationship with a man.  That's speculation, of course....but so is what you are accusing him of doing, IMO.

Edited August 17, 2019 by ALarson

[longview]

30 minutes ago, ALarson said:

Ok.  Well, I think it's best to avoid stating things such as Ed is "sliming" Lois or cheating on her or having an affair, when you (and others) have no idea that has taken place.  

Once again.....Lois is the one who filed for divorce.  We have not heard from her (that I'm aware of), but we have no idea if it was a mutual decision to end their marriage.  Maybe it was unhealthy for her or she was unhappy or wanted a different type of relationship with a man.  That's speculation, of course....but so is what you are accusing him of doing, IMO.

But you remain disconnected and unresponsive to the several points of doctrine that I have laid out.  It is less material who or what initiated whatever steps that were taken and in what order.  The situation stinks to high heaven.  My sympathy lies with Sis. Smart.

Edited August 17, 2019 by longview

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

2 hours ago, california boy said:

BUT YOU HAVE A WIFE.  Isn't that far more important than sex?  Is it at all possible that someone who is gay wants companionship with someone they love?  I swear church members are obsessed with sex as being the great motivator for having a relationship.  

 

“He” has a wife, a decades long marriage, five children. I am not obsessed with anything concerning sex, I am standing back, looking at the collateral damage today, in the future, and the eternities. BTW, a wife that he says that “he loves, and always will love” , and that this is he says, “will bind them for or in the eternities”. His words not mine, but now that wife, his children, his grandchildren, and generations to come, will be affected for a short term (and the eternities) to the desire,  “flesh and the heart”. We are not speaking of someone who married young, came out of the closet earlier on, where both married persons can move on to a long time, or lifetime fulfilling relationship. Sadly, as my comments reflected, that ship sailed decades ago. I understand that you and many others had marriages that lasted for a few years, and both realized that it would have to end. I am speaking from the experience of what a broken home is like, as the child and victim, of someone who wanted that “first kiss”, that “first thrill”, that “first love”, over and over again. In that decision, or the fact that, “he was not just a one woman man”, and the delusion that “God made home that way”, left nothing but heartache in his wake. In fact in led him into bigamy, leaving his legitimate family, homeless and destitute. Oddly enough, he spoke of these decisions, crouched in the language of Church membership, citing...”scripture study, fasting and prayer”, that led him to the decisions of deslove the family, leave the Church, and change his lifestyle. Oddly enough, after my bio-Father divorced my mother, we would go to his other family for his two weekends a month, each night he would read the scriptures out loud. Until of course when he had to flee the State for not paying child support. When my Father adopted us, he could not sign the papers fast enough, so he could return to the State, because he did have to pay it any longer. Of course when he got back, he got locked up again, because he had not payed the State the money he owed from before. As my reply pointed out, wife, children, FAMILY, must always come secondary to any desire, it is called being an adult. There is no need in trying to get inside my head, nor try to put me in a box so you can catalog me, I said clearly what I meant, and “sex” was the least of it all, I am talking about the betrayal of one’s family, over the needs of just one.  

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

4 hours ago, ALarson said:

Really?

So, do you believe he is he lying when he stated this below?

 

No, I was reinforcing what he said. A person does not have to leave the Church over divorce, or simply for identifying as Gay. I was speaking only to the comment that he felt like there was no place for him in the Church. Pointing out the fact, that he could, and should stay. No, I do not believe that he was lying, and making the point for him to remain. Sorry if some other message came through, maybe I should do a reread, or someone could point out where I said he had been unfaithful to his wife.  

Edited August 17, 2019 by Bill “Papa” Lee

[Storm Rider]

8 hours ago, california boy said:

This is seriously one of the most ignorant posts I have seen on this subject.  Total assumptions about something you obviously know NOTHING about.  How do you think gay guys end up in straight marriages?  Figure out the math.  He is 64.  I wonder who was telling him if he just got married, he would become straight?

What is overwhelmingly sad situation and one of great disappointment is the Church putting him in this situation simply because he trusted their "promise from God".  Everything I have studied about the teachings of Jesus Christ is that those teachings should be based on true eternal principles, not false promises.

You are so willing to blindly support the Church.  Perhaps he was too, and that was the beginning of this tragic story.

You are absolutely, completely dead wrong. My position has nothing to do with the Church and everything to do with Jesus Christ. Within the gospel of Jesus Christ there is no room, none, for homosexuality. If you are telling me this fellow has decided to leave his wife and live a celibate life, then fine. However, that is not what this individuals seems to want. He is in the throws of jungle fever, passions run amok and Jesus and his gospel has been sold out. Sounds harsh, but you can't put lipstick on that pig and think anything differently.

[MustardSeed]

He is in the throws of jungle fever! 

[mrmarklin]

14 hours ago, Calm said:

Of course not, but he may have started considering what his relationship with the Church was, started questioning it, and then doubting and now doesn’t believe or doesn’t think it is worth the effort in the future. No need to assume an affair even if he has decided that after the divorce he sees no reason not to have a romantic SS relationship.

And it comes across as gossip. 

You don’t think he’s sinning?

You must be incredibly naive. 

 

[MustardSeed]

5 minutes ago, mrmarklin said:

You don’t think he’s sinning?

You must be incredibly naive. 

 

I dont see calm placing judgement on him either sinning or not sinning.  She is speaking to the accusation that he has had an affair, specifically, which is obviously speculation. Not that Calm can’t speak for herself I suppose. 

[mrmarklin]

21 minutes ago, MustardSeed said:

He is in the throws of jungle fever! 

Throes......

 

Says the Grammar Nazi.😉

[mrmarklin]

Just now, mrmarklin said:

Throes......

 

Says the Grammar Nazi.😉

I have personally know three couples where one of the partners was gay. Two of them came out when they found a “better” deal, devastating their families. 

One kept it in until the death of his wife(who did know, apparently). After her death he began to live the lifestyle.  His three adult sons were shocked, as they had had no idea. They all essentially disowned their father, as they didn’t want his immorality near their families. Thankfully for all he is now deceased. 

 

BTW none of these people were LDS.

[MustardSeed]

20 minutes ago, mrmarklin said:

Thankfully for all he is now deceased. 

I’ll get the popcorn. 

Besides that, I think it goes without saying that I wish not anyone a marriage where one feels attraction stronger for anyone other than their only beloved. 

[JulieM]

48 minutes ago, mrmarklin said:

I have personally know three couples where one of the partners was gay. Two of them came out when they found a “better” deal, devastating their families. 

One kept it in until the death of his wife(who did know, apparently). After her death he began to live the lifestyle.  His three adult sons were shocked, as they had had no idea. They all essentially disowned their father, as they didn’t want his immorality near their families. Thankfully for all he is now deceased. 

Wow.  None of that has to do with whether or not someone is gay.  For every example you give like yours above, one can be given for a heterosexual leaving their marriage for immoral reasons.

From what Ed Smart wrote, he is not having an affair and would not do that to his wife.  

Edited August 17, 2019 by JulieM

[Calm]

18 hours ago, longview said:

  But regardless, when he married his wife he made a covenant in a three-way relationship. 

Scripturally is the only way to leave a covenant is sin or can covenants be mutually dissolved?

It seems strange that God would have it black or white when his children are in some many different stages of spiritual development and emotional maturity and self awareness at the time they covenant. 

Is it possible that God might allow a third option to valiant and rejection of God as in ‘thank you God for letting me have this opportunity to learn of the great blessings you want to give me, but at this time I don’t think I want them. Perhaps I am not ready where I thought I was. I am choosing to step away from this covenant, Lord, therefore because I think I can learn more of your love without being burdened with this specific covenant. You taught your yoke is light and I need to learn why I have felt this part to be heavy. I don’t want to leave you just to break a promise I made with you, I believe this is a better way to find ways I can better live my commitment to you.’?

serious question. The eternal covenant seen as an unbreakable contract where one is damned if one wants to withdraw is problematic for me even when we view hell as a teaching time. 

[Calm]

4 hours ago, mrmarklin said:

You don’t think he’s sinning?

You must be incredibly naive. 

 

I have had three relatives go through excruciating pain when finding out their husband was gay and confessing he was having an affair or was cruising bars for one night stands. I have had friends who were straight have affairs or had spouses who had one.  Some confessed and repented, others walked often blaming their spouse and God  

I also know of gays who did not engage in such behaviour before living openly. 

I am specifically referring to falling in love/lust with someone besides one’s spouse and acting on it before divorce. 

Sinning....we all do that. I don’t know his thoughts or behaviour so finding his specific issues would be impossible for me, though I am certain they are there as no one is perfect. 

Edited August 18, 2019 by Calm

[Calm]

2 hours ago, Bill “Papa” Lee said:

my reply pointed out, wife, children, FAMILY, must always come secondary to any desire, it is called being an adult

I think you mean desire comes secondary when one is an adult, which I so agree with. How one bests serves one’s family may vary. Teaching them honesty by example seems high in importance to me. 

Edited August 17, 2019 by Calm

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

25 minutes ago, Calm said:

I think you mean desire comes secondary when one is an adult, which I so agree with. How one bests serves one’s family may vary. Teaching them honesty by example seems high in importance to me. 

I agree, but in this case, if his wife were willing to remain married, would not seem better to keep the family together? Of course, this is the big, what if? Does his wife wish to remain married, to preserve the family for eternity?

[mrmarklin]

4 minutes ago, Bill “Papa” Lee said:

I agree, but in this case, if his wife were willing to remain married, would not seem better to keep the family together? Of course, this is the big, what if? Does his wife wish to remain married, to preserve the family for eternity?

The reality is he should have taken his secret to the grave. Had he been a moral person.  But he’s obviously not. 

[JulieM]

1 minute ago, mrmarklin said:

The reality is he should have taken his secret to the grave. Had he been a moral person.  But he’s obviously not. 

How do you know it was a “secret” that he was gay?  He may haven’t announced it publicly, but do you believe his wife didn’t know?  

The point is, we don’t know and you’re making statements based on speculation.

[california boy]

5 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

Everything you say is true. These things keep me somewhat focused.  But there can still be no flirting or hope of a physical relationship until after the resurrection and healing. 

I feel so sorry for you.  You can’t flirt while married to a loving wife.

[Vance]

What doth it profit a man, to gain his sexual desires and lose his own soul.

[Meadowchik]

3 minutes ago, Vance said:

What doth it profit a man, to gain his sexual desires and lose his own soul.

What does it profit a man, to judge another's best efforts to do right? Also, being gay is about more than sex.

Edited August 17, 2019 by Meadowchik

[JulieM]

5 minutes ago, Vance said:

What doth it profit a man, to gain his sexual desires and lose his own soul.

Wow.  More judging.

Why do you make this just about sex?