Change To Missionary Communication Policy: Phone Home On P-Day!

[SouthernMo]

It is clear President Nelson is not afraid of challenging past practices. I like that. 

[BlueDreams]

1 hour ago, pogi said:

No way!  Congrats!  When is the due date?

We have our second due in April.  And we were told that we couldn't have any after 10 years of failed attempts because of endometriosis, so this is our little miracle #2.

That's exciting! Congrats Pogi. I've worked with a lot of people with variations of infertility and watching them become parents is always a beautiful thing.

 My daughter is due sometime early June. I'm not big on due dates because that just sets me up for disappointment when I'm as big as a house and feel tempted to count down.   

I wasn't too worried about getting pregnant. My family is notoriously fertile and I followed that family tradition to a tee. But I've been waiting to be a wife/mom for a long time, so that part very much seems miraculous that it all came together in what will be less than the duration of my bro's mission. He knew it could happen when he left (especially considering there's a 10 year age gap), but I still feel a little bad that he missed so many big events. 

 

With luv,

BD

[let’s roll]

A welcomed change as it provides flexibility and as it is applied in a manner to benefit the individual situation and needs of each missionary, will aid in the work.

Of course it will be of most benefit to the work as it is applied with wisdom.  If, like a number of other policies in the Church, a “may” policy, in the minds of many becomes a “must,” some of the benefit will be lost.  

When the missionary age was lowered, many acted as if the “may” serve at 18 was a “must” serve at 18 to the detriment of many missionaries and the work.

The new policy is that missionaries “may” call home once a week.  To the extent that missionary families treat it as a “must” call home each week and set that expectation with their missionary, as a practical matter the policy may be more of a burden than a blessing for some missionaries.

[Thinking]

3 hours ago, JAHS said:

How many people who are not on missions actually call their parents once per week? 

How many people who are not on missions have to stay with the same person 24/7?

[hope_for_things]

1 hour ago, The Nehor said:

Yuck, I hope not.

Eat your vitamin pills. Get some rest. It's going to be exciting.

[The Nehor]

Just now, hope_for_things said:

Eat your vitamin pills. Get some rest. It's going to be exciting.

That is not exciting. It is milquetoast exalting of service missions over proselyting and suggesting that duration of service is irrelevant. Almost no one can become an effective missionary in three months.

[JAHS]

2 hours ago, Calm said:

It says families...does this mean grandparents as well?  I know missionaries that do a weekly letter that goes out to 50 plus friends, so quite possibly the writing might not change much...those who write will continue to do so, those who don't now can call and keep the family bond going.

It makes sense given the access to Facebook and other ways to instantly see what family is doing with not only the written word, but photos and texts to give permission as missionaries aren't really isolated that much anymore from what I have seen, so the distraction is already there for those that will get distracted.  And costs wouldn't cut into missionaries' budgets like they would have in the past or cause resentment because some could afford it and others not.  Might as well therefore make use of the positive contribution of more direct support from family, imo.

The letter seems to specify parents:
"The means of communication may vary depending on the circumstances, location, and
schedule of the missionary and family. If a missionary’s parents live in different locations, the
missionary may contact each parent separately. It is not expected that missionaries will call or
video chat with their parents every week."

You can interpret that as you will. I am sure each individual mission president will have their own take on the policy depending on the makeup of their missionaries.
I would assume if a missionary only had grandparents living he/she could call them. Or if everyone was all together in one place the missionary could talk to whoever is near the phone at the time of the call.

 

[strappinglad]

Well, if you can't beat 'em join 'em . At what age can the apron strings be at least loosened? That said, I feel sad for missionaries assigned to my town, pop. 4500 with 10 wards and a branch. They must get bored silly. I can't remember the last time we had an actual convert baptism. The church here grows by births and move-ins. 

[Calm]

My son loved Utah as a mission ( since we were in Alberta at the time, he couldn't get assigned there).  Only tracked an afternoon because one mission president required it.  Even in areas where almost all LDS, they had constant appts for reactivation lessons.

Might be very different though in your area.

Edited February 15, 2019 by Calm

[hope_for_things]

1 hour ago, The Nehor said:

That is not exciting. It is milquetoast exalting of service missions over proselyting and suggesting that duration of service is irrelevant. Almost no one can become an effective missionary in three months.

One man's trash is another man's treasure.  We're a church of lay ministers, no paid clergy, no little to no formal training for leaders, just jump into callings and do the best you can, follow the spirit and hope it all works out.   I believe people can do good and make a difference with 3 months of service, personally I believe even a couple hours of service can help do good.  

[Tacenda]

I think this is great, but feel bad for the thousands of missionaries in the past that needed to make that phone call at some critical times on their missions. My son, others who've lost family members, the list could go on and on. But the church won't apologize, never has and probably never will. There's my negative rant.

[Bernard Gui]

21 hours ago, The Nehor said:

I am not sure once a week like this would help with anxiety.

When I was physically assaulted (kid on something, not sure what) I ended up with a cut lip and bruising. My companion ran away. After I fought him off and got away I took pictures and sent a letter home about it and scared my mom. I was a dumb teenager and a bad son that day.  

I never told my parents about the 4 times I had weapons pulled on me. 

Then there’s our oldest son Artisticosso. During one Mother’s Day call, we heard his companion say in the background, “Don’t worry about his leg. It’s all better now.”

I think some of the anxiety problems we have today come from the ability to constantly and instantly check up on each other electronically. When communication was not so readily accessible, self-reliance became a necessary part of our survival skills. It also made us depend on those physically closer to us for support.

Edited February 16, 2019 by Bernard Gui

[Bernard Gui]

12 hours ago, SouthernMo said:

It is clear President Nelson is not afraid of challenging past practices. I like that. 

Past practices are not necessarily bad when we consider them in context. It’s only recently that instant contact has been available and affordable. Such communication was not possible when I served. In order to call home, we had to find a person with a radio feed that could hook into a phone line in the States. Very expensive and time-consuming. Sometimes it took hours to make a connection. Airmail worked OK, but it took two weeks. My parents saved all my letters.

Weekly calls from our first three sons on their missions and our daughter who worked as a nanny in Switzerland for a year would have been prohibitively expensive. 

Edited February 16, 2019 by Bernard Gui

[ERMD]

11 hours ago, The Nehor said:

That is not exciting. It is milquetoast exalting of service missions over proselyting and suggesting that duration of service is irrelevant. Almost no one can become an effective missionary in three months.

Service missions are far from milquetoast.  For those who cannot serve proselyting missions, service missions provide a way for them to give meaningful service and to represent their Savior as best as they can.  Whether they be wheelchair bound, have intellectual challenges, or mental difficulties, there are many who want to share in the joys of missionary work, but heretofore have been unable to.

Service missionaries receive a call from the Prophet through a member of the Quorum of the Twelve.  They serve as close to full time as they can (and most can), anywhere from 6-24 months, with the goal being 24 months.  The First Presidency and the Twelve view service missions as being on par with proselyting missions, and their church record reflects that.

Some significant culture change needs to take place.  Service missions aren't going away, but rather they are paving the way for many more to serve in the Savior's way, and to contribute in a manner that will be successful for them.

Edited February 16, 2019 by ERMD

[Hamba Tuhan]

2 hours ago, Tacenda said:

There's my negative rant.

Thanks. I've noted down in the register that you've made your negative rant for this thread.

[Calm]

1 hour ago, Bernard Gui said:

When communication was not so readily accessible, self-reliance became a necessary of our survival skills

 My self reliance resulted in three minor health issues turning into three major, even crippling disabilities because it was clearly taught around my home those who expressed concerns about pain instead of just walking it off, so to speak, were wimps.  So now I can't walk with pain, can't sit without pain,can't sleep. Treating anxieties about life as they appear is no magic bullet, but my kid has never been hospitalized because of poor health management, mental or physical...though might have come close putting off an emergency room treatment for vomiting (stupid for diabetic, but she wanted her own bed).

Times have changed, quick and effective early treatment can in some cases prevent health issues from becoming chronic.

Edited February 16, 2019 by Calm

[Kenngo1969]

I can see the wisdom in this change, and if someone wants or needs to contact home every week via text or phone, more power to him or her.  However, I don't think there's any way I would have done so.  It would have been [even more] distracting.  Truthfully, my parents were lucky to get a letter.   My brother's calls from Italy were highlights, but, back then, making them a weekly occurrence would have been prohibitively expensive.  (I'm not sure how much has changed since then.)  As our esteemed Hermano Don Bernardo points out, making voice contact from Timbuktu poses logistical challenges.  I wish some of our other "foreign correspondents" were here to weigh in on that aspect as well.  Also, I wonder if this change will result in a "Have/Have Not" disparity between those with the means to make such contact and those without.  (I hope not. )

Edited February 16, 2019 by Kenngo1969

[Kenngo1969]

3 hours ago, Bernard Gui said:

I never told my parents about the 4 times I had weapons pulled on me. 

Then there’s our oldest son Artisticosso. During one Mother’s Day call, we heard his companion say in the background, “Don’t worry about his leg. It’s all better now.” ...

Did his companion "kiss it all beddo"?    (Sorry; couldn't resist!  Carry on! )

[Kenngo1969]

16 hours ago, MorningStar said:

My husband wrote home twice his entire mission.  

"Omigosh!  We got a letter!  What's wrong?!!!"   

[Kenngo1969]

Thought this was interesting: https://medium.com/@bekahgrant/this-little-box-brings-cell-service-to-the-most-remote-places-on-earth-15dca135d7d8

[Amulek]

18 hours ago, MorningStar said:

My husband wrote home twice his entire mission.  

Hey, I'm pretty sure you're not my wife.  

Okay, technically, it was more than twice, but it certainly wasn't often. 

Rugged individualism runs strong in my family. My father has it; I have it; my...siblings have it. 

Still, I recognize that not everyone is the same, and I'm pleased that the new changes will open up opportunities for those missionaries who might benefit from increased contact.

 

[california boy]

4 hours ago, Kenngo1969 said:

I can see the wisdom in this change, and if someone wants or needs to contact home every week via text or phone, more power to him or her.  However, I don't think there's any way I would have done so.  It would have been [even more] distracting.  Truthfully, my parents were lucky to get a letter.   My brother's calls from Italy were highlights, but, back then, making them a weekly occurrence would have been prohibitively expensive.  (I'm not sure how much has changed since then.)  As our esteemed Hermano Don Bernardo points out, making voice contact from Timbuktu poses logistical challenges.  I wish some of our other "foreign correspondents" were here to weigh in on that aspect as well.  Also, I wonder if this change will result in a "Have/Have Not" disparity between those with the means to make such contact and those without.  (I hope not. )

 I have a feeling Whatsapp will become a well-known app among members of the church.  Free texting, phone calling and video anywhere in the world where you can get an internet signal.  It is a commonly used app all throughout Europe to make calls between countries.

[Tacenda]

8 hours ago, Bernard Gui said:

Past practices are not necessarily bad when we consider them in context. It’s only recently that instant contact has been available and affordable. Such communication was not possible when I served. In order to call home, we had to find a person with a radio feed that could hook into a phone line in the States. Very expensive and time-consuming. Sometimes it took hours to make a connection. Airmail worked OK, but it took two weeks. My parents saved all my letters.

Weekly calls from our first three sons on their missions and our daughter who worked as a nanny in Switzerland for a year would have been prohibitively expensive. 

I understand that weekly is probably unneeded or even detrimental. But there are several stories flying around the web that are filled with the calls the missionary wanted to make but the MP told them no. Or the parent/parents that needed to talk to their child and couldn't. It's mainly those situations I'm talking about. 

[Tacenda]

8 hours ago, Hamba Tuhan said:

Thanks. I've noted down in the register that you've made your negative rant for this thread.

Touche'!! 😋

[Bernard Gui]

A question for those old timers who served missions...

Only three elders left my mission early and none because of anxiety. It was not an easy place to serve.

Two were for medical reasons and one for behavior. I don’t recall crippling anxiety being an issue then. Was it that way when you served or was our mission unique? I know it is an issue for our youth today, but it is a growing problem across our culture, not exclusively with church members. 

BTW, I am very familiar with its effects.

 

Edited February 16, 2019 by Bernard Gui