Taking A "sabbatical" From Activity In The Church

[Bobbieaware]

As I see it, going to Church isn't productive to most people's goals. People want to help others and enjoy others. Going to Church and being actively involved is time consuming, often promotes bad attitudes about others and causes many to spin their wheels doing busywork.

Please tell me that this is some idea of a joke? If not, my understanding of things as the really is starting to come into sharper focus.

[Nevo]

I'll say again that this particular thing strikes me as made-up, insincere NOM/Middle Way troll bait. It was written to elicit exactly the reaction it is getting (on both sides).

I find Jana Riess about as authentic as they come. I have nothing but admiration for her. She joined the Church, as I recall, when she was a PhD student in American religious history at Columbia. She's more spiritually disciplined than I'll ever be (see her book Flunking Sainthood) so I find it bizarre that she's being castigated here as "feckless" and "self-indulgent." I think her sabbatical idea is a good idea for some people (people like her, basically). I remember Kevin Barney suggesting something similar years ago. In the meantime, I would recommend that those hating on Jana pick up one of her books (try her short Book of Mormon commentary).

 

 

Edit: I was mistaken about when she joined the Church. It was during her final year at Princeton Theological Seminary: http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/lifestyle/52745310-80/riess-says-mormon-church.html.csp?page=1

Edited August 19, 2015 by Nevo

[SeekingUnderstanding]

I find Jana Riess about as authentic as they come. I have nothing but admiration for her. She joined the Church, as I recall, when she was a PhD student in American religious history at Columbia. She's more spiritually disciplined than I'll ever be (see her book Flunking Sainthood) so I find it bizarre that she's being castigated here as "feckless" and "self-indulgent." I think her sabbatical idea is a good idea for some people (people like her, basically). I remember Kevin Barney suggesting something similar years ago. In the meantime, I would recommend that those hating on Jana pick up one of her books (try her short Book of Mormon commentary).

From this comment, I can tell that you are a dumb, covenant breaking liar. Obviously.

Edited August 19, 2015 by SeekingUnderstanding

[jkwilliams]

I find Jana Riess about as authentic as they come. I have nothing but admiration for her. She joined the Church, as I recall, when she was a PhD student in American religious history at Columbia. She's more spiritually disciplined than I'll ever be (see her book Flunking Sainthood) so I find it bizarre that she's being castigated here as "feckless" and "self-indulgent." I think her sabbatical idea is a good idea for some people (people like her, basically). I remember Kevin Barney suggesting something similar years ago. In the meantime, I would recommend that those hating on Jana pick up one of her books (try her short Book of Mormon commentary).

I don't always agree with her, but she's definitely sincere, and I too, have a lot of admiration for her. I suppose people will find fault if they wish, but perhaps they're missing out on greater understanding and compassion.

[Rain]

I hadn't seen this article but I was thinking about this last night. I just feel exhausted by church. I feel disconnected from God and I feel that much of that disconnection matches the disconnection I feel from the church as if they are the same thing. In the ARP group my wife and I lead we were talking about doing whatever it takes to build a personal relationship with God even if that thing seemed hard. Well, maybe taking a break from church could rejuvenate my enthusiasm for church and even increase my hope that there may be truth in the church's claims.

After 40 years of ultra orthodox/orthoprax activity where I've held many leadership positions I feel empty. I've always been fully active, family home evenings every week, family and personal scripture study & prayer every day, study for sunday lessons, etc. and yet I don't feel fulfilled by the church. Doing it now feels like I'm just going through the motions. I don't feel closer to God even though I try doing all the things I'm told I should.

I give this as background to my question; What am I supposed to do? Keep doing the same thing and hope for a different result? Should I expect that I will suddenly feel connected to God again by simply doing the same things? It's kind of a checklist mentality. Or should I try something different? Should I seek for a better way to connect with God even if it means I take time away from church exploring other options or should I stick with the status quo and hope that something magically changes? I can understand how this woman feels because it's what I'm feeling now.

I think sometimes you do just have to push through it, similar to weight lifting. You don't get stronger muscles unless you push through and get the micro tears that heal and build.

Other times you do need a rest, but you have to remember giving up everything is not the answer. A person who is ill still needs to breath, still needs food of some kind and water. A person who doesn't get those things will die. He may also need medicine.

I think the big 3 would be prayer, the sacrament and scriptures if your spirit is sick. But like with being physically sick where you may take nourishment through an IV then things can be changed up spiritually like when halcenero spoke of taking the sacrament and then staying in the building.

Or with scripture reading - read the psalms or new testament if it has been awhile. Or conference talks. Or listen to them instead of reading them. Or scriptures in small doses throughout the day instead of all at once. Or if you have a small child, read one of the scripture readers to the child at bed time. There are many ways to do scriptures. Listen to the hymns - scriptures by song. Change it up for awhile.

Change it up with prayer. If you usually do it by your bed in the morning, change it by going outside. Ask your wife or children individuality to prayer with you. When I broke my leg I found myself singing, "A Child's Prayer". I later recognized that I was praying the song. Another song you could pray is Lead Kindly Light.

A number of Christmas ago I realized I was so stressed that I wasn't getting anything out of it. I decided to ignore traditions and expectations and just do what I wanted or felt right. Gone were the neighbor gifts, but we had our first open house that I had wanted to do for years. Gone were gifts for anyone except for my husband and children, but up went lights galore. I know extended family was thrown by that at first, but it was right for our family. I gave up what was extra and kept what kept me close to Christ.

Sabbaticals can be good, but it doesn't mean you do nothing, nor does it mean you give up necessities.

Edited August 19, 2015 by Rain

[carbon dioxide]

For some people, they might need to take some time off to reflect what they think is important and what is not and spiritually recharge their battery.   If her time off came out as a net positive and she is more faithful today than when she took the year off, then the time off for her was not a bad thing.  I think some people might take this idea to mean that its ok to take time off whenever they want for any worldly that is a problem. 

[jkwilliams]

For some people, they might need to take some time off to reflect what they think is important and what is not and spiritually recharge their battery.   If her time off came out as a net positive and she is more faithful today than when she took the year off, then the time off for her was not a bad thing.  I think some people might take this idea to mean that its ok to take time off whenever they want for any worldly that is a problem.

I'm not on sabbatical. I'm an emeritus member.

[Senator]

I think it's a rather good idea.

 

Jana's only mistake is that she spoke publicly about it.

[ttribe]

Prominent?  Never heard of her.

 

She wants to take a break? Okay, that's her choice.

 

The ranting judgmental criticisms lobbed against her on this board?  Absurd.

[Mola Ram Suda Ram]

Prominent?  Never heard of her.

 

She wants to take a break? Okay, that's her choice.

 

The ranting judgmental criticisms lobbed against her on this board?  Absurd.

Yes just look at all the judgementalism. There is so much of it. One person so far seems to have passed a judgement. They didn't find her authentic. Ooooooo.

 

AS for me, I think I like the idea, strangely enough. I am sure my wife would get mad at for me for admitting as much.

Edited August 19, 2015 by Mola Ram Suda Ram

[BookofMormonLuvr]

I am frankly shocked at how judgmental, and even angry, the OP sounds in response to her story.

Are you mad because you believe you have valiantly stuck it out, and you believe she is just giving herself a free ride?

Is it akin to the man who hired workers in his field, and paid them all the same no matter which part of the day he hired them in?

Let someone's personal walk with their LORD, be their's- and let your walk be your's.

[jkwilliams]

Yes just look at all the judgementalism. There is so much of it. One person so far seems to have passed a judgement. They didn't find her authentic. Ooooooo.

 

AS for me, I think I like the idea, strangely enough. I am sure my wife would get mad at for me for admitting as much.

I'd say that the several people who have condemned her for violating her covenants are being a tad judgmental.

[ttribe]

Yes just look at all the judgementalism. There is so much of it. One person so far seems to have passed a judgement. They didn't find her authentic. Ooooooo.

 

You really should go back to ignoring me.  It seems I only make you angry these days.

[Rain]

For some people, they might need to take some time off to reflect what they think is important and what is not and spiritually recharge their battery. If her time off came out as a net positive and she is more faithful today than when she took the year off, then the time off for her was not a bad thing. I think some people might take this idea to mean that its ok to take time off whenever they want for any worldly that is a problem.

I think the not knowing is the scary part. How do you know you will come back? That's what is terrifying to me and others - my loved ones saying they will come back, but losing the Spirit instead and never coming back which I hear of far more often than people coming back.

[HappyJackWagon]

I think the not knowing is the scary part. How do you know you will come back? That's what is terrifying to me and others - my loved ones saying they will come back, but losing the Spirit instead and never coming back which I hear of far more often than people coming back.

But what if going off in another direction helps them connect with God in a better way? Perhaps that is a natural part of their faith journey.

[halconero]

dumb

Is intellectually misguided more palatable for you?

Edited August 19, 2015 by halconero

[BlueDreams]

I actually was surprised how little bad reaction I had to what she stated. I don't like the idea of taking a year off from church all together. It's about as appetizing to me as a juice cleanse (which don't actually work anyways) or a 3 day fast (also not super effective for 99% of humanity and their probs), or other extreme practices that people do for their health, whether it be spiritual, physical, etc.

 

That stated I agreed with the priniciple of why she did what she did. ie. taking time for rest or heal. Along with the scriptures about not becoming weary in well-doing there's also the scriptures that noting that one shouldn't be running/doing tasks faster than they have strength or means to do it. Diligence in duty often means slowing down, but we mormons have a tendency to forget that. (un)luckily I have a built in mechanism called migraines that tell me when I'm overdoing it. Some don't and they keep on pushing and pushing a pushing until they royally burn out...which shows up as anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue, poorer health, etc. Our bodies our literally not made for 7 days of persistent labor for years. For a stretch, sure, but not continuously. 

 

Ideally, we'd have better boundaries and be more in tune with our weaknesses. In which case, mini breaks would be enough (like an hour of meditation, relaxing prayer, small walks, etc). But unfortunately a lot of humanity aren't aware until they start to seriously break down. Or we are aware and decide we'll just have to keep pushing until we can't push no further. 

 

When we do exert ourselves excessively, I do think there is a period of time where we should do A LOT less. This is probably where I disagree the most with her. A year out for most people is excessive IMHO and could do more harm than good. I think of it a lot like a body. Some injuries may take (and should take) a long while before you're fully functional again. This may include literally laying about for the worst of it and slow introduction to PT. Most injuries will not be that severe though. She sounded fairly burnt out if she was getting to the point where leaving the church seemed a pretty good option. She may have had a more severe case of burnout than most...who knows, I can't judge. But it's not necessarily good to assume what worked for you is a health formula for another. Her qualifiers for who may want to try this were too loose and not well defined.

 

That all said, I can't imagine leaving for a year to recoup in any circumstance. Probably because my current church service helps cleanse/strengthen me. But I also have major boundaries and am not shy about taking mini-breaks per se. I have said no to callings when I knew I wouldn't be able to stretch that much further. I have skipped church/meetings in a blue moon because there was something more important, spiritually/relationally, to attend to. Once I just felt more called to a mountain to peacefully pray, ponder, and reestablish my purpose...so I left right after sacrament in order to do so. My old advisor would say that I was good at "self-care." And I think that's probably the better solution than what she recommends....learning to stave off burn out before it happens so that more serious rest/spiritual PT is less likely to happen.

 

With luv,

BD

Edited August 19, 2015 by BlueDreams

[BlueDreams]

I hear what she's saying, even Jesus needed a break from people! I have heard a term "people fatigue" I felt like that on sunday-we had two sacrament mtg talks ALL about that Treck event and I just don't care and I don't think anyone else cared, based on facial expressions. I felt bad for people the missionaries brought, like is this a Church or what?

 

Just did that myself I had 9 major family/friend events in a 4 day stretch this last week. I'm now not talking to anyone except the very few people I have to or want to. People fatigue is so real for me (thus why I'll never live in a downtown region).

[stemelbow]

Please tell me that this is some idea of a joke? If not, my understanding of things as the really is starting to come into sharper focus.

That's not a joke. That's what Church is, quite often, to me.

[Scott Lloyd]

I think it is better to learn how to say "no" at times than give up altogether even if only for a year.

Can you imagine God or the Holy Ghost taking a vacation from their awareness of us? If we are to become like him, it seems to me intelligent, thoughtful people can figure out a better compromise if one needs rejuvenation time and have the personality where that means one needs alone time (which category I fall into).

Right now I can hardly make it to church. But I do the bulletins for the last 2 and maybe a half years, maybe longer. Missed only once, can't remember why. For the kids, I use a coloring page on the ward monthly theme rather than a black and white version of a picture we seen a thousand times over the years. A member last week at the ward party was kind enough to say when I sighed about difficulty of getting there, that I was present among them through the bulletin I do. I liked that idea. For someone who is going to meetings as well it might be a burden, for me it is something to keep connection going so a win-win situation.

A coloring page on the program cover? What a great idea!

 

Are you able to find the clip art easily enough?

[Scott Lloyd]

That's not a joke. That's what Church is, quite often, to me.

Have you tried focusing more on what you, yourself, can bring to the worship service as opposed to what you get from it?

[ERayR]

Yes, but she didn't abandon her family.  Indeed, she appears to have grown closer to them and to the Church -- after a long vacation.  She must finally be the judge of her own hold on sanity, and what sort of "treatment" she needed.  It is not our concern to second-guess her.  We haven't walked a mile in her shoes.

 

Maybe, but just imagine what would happen if everybody decided to do this.  So much for Church activity and activities.

[bluebell]

Maybe this has already been said, but I don't understand why she had to take a break from Mormonism entirely.

She was still going to church one hour a week, why couldn't she do that with sacrament meeting?

[Scott Lloyd]

Maybe this has already been said, but I don't understand why she had to take a break from Mormonism entirely.

She was still going to church one hour a week, why couldn't she do that with sacrament meeting?

The same thought occurred to me.

 

The impression I got was of one trying too hard to show everyone how broad-minded and expansive she is.

Edited August 19, 2015 by Scott Lloyd

[bluebell]

The same thought occurred to me.

The impression I got was one of trying too hard to show everyone how broad-minded and expansive she is.

I wonder if it was a little bit of just not being very courageous in her decision. She would have had to explain herself way more often if she had kept that one point of contact. Since the whole point of the sabbatical seems to have been to "take it easy" I could see her shunning anything that might have been even a little difficult.