Mississippi Bishop Resigns from the Pulpit

[Maestrophil]

1 hour ago, bluebell said:

Can you share what you learned?

I didn't listen to the whole thing yet - but his items he said he was asked to do as a bishop seemed to revolve around how people were to confess sexual sins to him, and the guilt they had to endure because of it as well as the lack or grace offered in his opinion, so that was interesting.  Also - I believe that he insinuates that somewhere in teh long interview he discusses that he and his wife had morality problems that he never felt free/forgiven for - and talks about what his past negative church experiences are - plus he had been struggling with his faith pre-being called to be a bishop, and his wife as well.

 

[Calm]

42 minutes ago, Maestrophil said:

the lack or grace offered in his opinion

Wasn’t that his choice though?  To offer or not?

”plus he had been struggling with his faith pre-being called to be a bishop, and his wife as well”

Did he say why he accepted in that case?

Edited February 2, 2024 by Calm

[Maestrophil]

17 hours ago, Calm said:

Wasn’t that his choice though?  To offer or not?

”plus he had been struggling with his faith pre-being called to be a bishop, and his wife as well”

Did he say why he accepted in that case?

 

He said the Stake/Church compelled him to take action he was not comfortable with as far as requiring discipline

Yes - he said he believed that he was called by God, so that persuaded him to double down so to speak on his faith.

[teddyaware]

It looks like conjecture and surmising will no longer be necessary when it comes to this topic. The ex-bishop in under scrutiny has given over 3-1/2 hours of his time to the “always fair” John Dehlin that will likely clear up any questions one might have on the matter. Although I don’t have any desire to watch the smirking John Dehlin for one minute, much less 3-1/2 hours, those who do have the stomach to ingest the spectacle will likely have all their questions answered by the watching the following video. If the video has already been posted, my apologies.

 

Edited February 2, 2024 by teddyaware

[pogi]

On 1/16/2024 at 6:12 PM, Amulek said:

I don't deny that as being a possibility, but in context is really seems like he's just talking about pressure. At least that's how I read it.

He states, "My kids are homeschooled, so their friends, I pray that their friends will remain true to them regardless of what they believe. But, I just wont subject my children to the programming anymore. No more FSY trips. No more camps. No, that’s where they abused me. We’re not going to do that. Things are changing."

I take his references to no FSY and no camps to be referring to the (immediately preceding) "programming" that he refuses to subject his children to. FSY is very much a big social / spiritual experience, and I can see how kids might very well feel pressured to conform - especially when they have their big youth testimony meetings at the end of the week. The same sort of things happen at girls camp and on many high adventure outings / longer YM cams as well.

Plus, FSY wouldn't have even been a thing when he was a kid, so if he was abused at FSY then it would to have had to have been in the last year or two.

Just to follow-up on this - I just started watching the video, and very early on he addresses the abuse.  Unfortunately, he was sexually abused by his Young Men President/Scout Master on multiple occasions at sleep-overs and camp-outs, the worst part for him was that his friends and fellow scouts were forced to watch.  Hard to hear. 

Edited February 2, 2024 by pogi

[Tacenda]

6 minutes ago, pogi said:

Just to follow-up on this - I just started watching the video, and very early on he addresses the abuse.  Unfortunately, he was sexually abused by his Young Men President/Scout Master on multiple occasions at sleep-overs and camp-outs, the worst part for him was that his friends and fellow scouts were forced to watch.  Hard to hear. 

You'd think this would be a rare thing, but it seems you here stories like his over and over. So disheartening, maybe I'll give it a listen. 

[Teancum]

3 hours ago, teddyaware said:

It looks like conjecture and surmising will no longer be necessary when it comes to this topic. The ex-bishop in under scrutiny has given over 3-1/2 hours of his time to the “always fair” John Dehlin that will likely clear up any questions one might have on the matter. Although I don’t have any desire to watch the smirking John Dehlin for one minute, much less 3-1/2 hours, those who do have the stomach to ingest the spectacle will likely have all their questions answered by the watching the following video. If the video has already been posted, my apologies.

 

I bet you are great fun at a dinner party. 🙄

[bsjkki]

3 hours ago, pogi said:

Just to follow-up on this - I just started watching the video, and very early on he addresses the abuse.  Unfortunately, he was sexually abused by his Young Men President/Scout Master on multiple occasions at sleep-overs and camp-outs, the worst part for him was that his friends and fellow scouts were forced to watch.  Hard to hear. 

That is just awful. Very traumatic and I hope he can find healing with coming out in the open with the abuse. Does he mention if anyone was ever held accountable? These abuses need sunlight. 

[pogi]

9 minutes ago, bsjkki said:

That is just awful. Very traumatic and I hope he can find healing with coming out in the open with the abuse. Does he mention if anyone was ever held accountable? These abuses need sunlight. 

This happened in South Korea (he lived there for a time), his abuser had an American sounding name though.  He said that he did go to jail for related charges and only served a few months.  After being released he disappeared, and no one knows where he is at today.  Tragic!  There are most likely many more victims out there. 

It sounds like his older brother received the brunt of the abuse.   

[Calm]

3 hours ago, pogi said:

Just to follow-up on this - I just started watching the video, and very early on he addresses the abuse.  Unfortunately, he was sexually abused by his Young Men President/Scout Master on multiple occasions at sleep-overs and camp-outs, the worst part for him was that his friends and fellow scouts were forced to watch.  Hard to hear. 

I find it remarkable that he worked at being a Saint after that.  It sounds like there was likely a lot of personal commitment to the gospel and community for him.  While I still take issue with his comments about brainwashing, etc being highly disrespectful of members, there is understandable reason that anger exists.

Edited February 2, 2024 by Calm

[teddyaware]

1 hour ago, Teancum said:

I bet you are great fun at a dinner party. 🙄

I was once an aspiring comedy writer, but the farthest I ever got with that ambition was the submission of a cassette tape of some of my jokes and routines to one Don Imus, a then very popular New York City radio talk show host who was in hot competition shock jock Howard Stern. Imus found my stuff genuinely funny but said my offbeat material wouldn’t be a good fit for his program. I also did a little amateur standup, and also had a 2-1/2 minute comedy radio spot that broadcast every Friday night out of a radio station in Atlantic City, New Jersey.

I’m  still regarded by friends and family as a funny man whose wacko jokes and quips often elicit sidesplitting laughter. One of the problems with my standup routine delivery was that I would often find my own jokes so funny that I would go into fits of laughter, thereby sabotaging my performance by stealing my own thunder. To this day my laughter can often be heard within the walls of my home as I regularly come up with new comedic ideas that cause me to chortle, cackle and slap my knees throughout the day. More than one friend has told me that that I’d do a good job of keeping myself amused if I were ever thrown into solitary confinement.

As the saying goes, you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Edited February 2, 2024 by teddyaware

[Calm]

7 minutes ago, teddyaware said:

I was once an aspiring comedy writer, but the farthest I ever got with that ambition was the submission of a cassette tape of some of my jokes and routines to one Don Imus, a then very popular New York City radio talk show host who was in hot competition shock jock Howard Stern. Imus found my stuff genuinely funny but said my offbeat material wouldn’t be a good fit for his program. I also did a little amateur standup, and also had a 2-1/2 minute comedy radio spot that broadcast every Friday night out of a radio station in Atlantic City, New Jersey.

I’m  still regarded by friends and family as a funny man whose wacko jokes and quips often elicit sidesplitting laughter. One of the problems with my standup routine delivery was that I would often find my own jokes so funny that I would go into fits of laughter, thereby sabotaging my performance by stealing my own thunder. To this day my laughter can often be heard within the walls of my home as I regularly come up with new comedic ideas that cause me to chortle, cackle and slap my knees throughout the day. More than one friend has told me that that I’d do a good job of keeping myself amused if I were ever thrown into solitary confinement.

As the saying goes, you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Thanks for sharing this history about yourself.  It is nice to learn posters’ backgrounds.  This was unexpected.  You come across to me as ‘all business’, very serious on this board (understandably the topic lends itself to seriousness).   This dimension being added to your personality is interesting to me. (I can’t figure out how to not make that sound condescending, but I just mean I find people fascinating with all the variability and unexpectedness each individual possesses if one looks close enough.)

[pogi]

40 minutes ago, teddyaware said:

I was once an aspiring comedy writer, but the farthest I ever got with that ambition was the submission of a cassette tape of some of my jokes and routines to one Don Imus, a then very popular New York City radio talk show host who was in hot competition shock jock Howard Stern. Imus found my stuff genuinely funny but said my offbeat material wouldn’t be a good fit for his program. I also did a little amateur standup, and also had a 2-1/2 minute comedy radio spot that broadcast every Friday night out of a radio station in Atlantic City, New Jersey.

I’m  still regarded by friends and family as a funny man whose wacko jokes and quips often elicit sidesplitting laughter. One of the problems with my standup routine delivery was that I would often find my own jokes so funny that I would go into fits of laughter, thereby sabotaging my performance by stealing my own thunder. To this day my laughter can often be heard within the walls of my home as I regularly come up with new comedic ideas that cause me to chortle, cackle and slap my knees throughout the day. More than one friend has told me that that I’d do a good job of keeping myself amused if I were ever thrown into solitary confinement.

As the saying goes, you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Would genuinely love to see more of that side of you on these boards. 

[Amulek]

6 hours ago, pogi said:

Just to follow-up on this - I just started watching the video, and very early on he addresses the abuse.  Unfortunately, he was sexually abused by his Young Men President/Scout Master on multiple occasions at sleep-overs and camp-outs, the worst part for him was that his friends and fellow scouts were forced to watch.  Hard to hear. 

Absolutely horrible. With him having gone through something like that I can understand him not wanting his kids to be involved in sleep-overs of any kind.

I've noticed that has become more common. Kids get together for 'late-overs' now. When I was a kid we used to spend the night at friend's houses all the time. Sure, we would sometimes sneak out and get into a little mischief, but nothing scandalous ever happened. I'm grateful for having lived such a charmed life where I was able to enjoy those types of activities without any concern for something like that ever happening. I wish that had been his experience as well - I'm saddened it wasn't.

 

[california boy]

12 hours ago, teddyaware said:

It looks like conjecture and surmising will no longer be necessary when it comes to this topic. The ex-bishop in under scrutiny has given over 3-1/2 hours of his time to the “always fair” John Dehlin that will likely clear up any questions one might have on the matter. Although I don’t have any desire to watch the smirking John Dehlin for one minute, much less 3-1/2 hours, those who do have the stomach to ingest the spectacle will likely have all their questions answered by the watching the following video. If the video has already been posted, my apologies.

 

I wanted to thank you for posting this link to the interview.  I have never listened to John Delhin before.  I just thought John Delhin was an angry ex-Mormon trying to expose ugly things about the Church.  Maybe he is that.  I don't really know since this is my first time listening to one of his podcasts.  What I do know is that in at least this podcast, I found him to want to understand why this former bishop left the Church.  I found Nick and his wife Amanda to be very believable and authentic about where they came from and how they got to this point.  After listening to him, it is hard to believe some of the things that have been said about him on this board.  I guess since I have listened to this podcast, I should investigate what horrible things he has said on TicTok.  I know most of you will never give him the time to explain himself.  But at least Teddy has given me the opportunity to just click and see what he has to say unfiltered by either side of the judgements of others.  

[Teancum]

15 hours ago, teddyaware said:

I was once an aspiring comedy writer, but the farthest I ever got with that ambition was the submission of a cassette tape of some of my jokes and routines to one Don Imus, a then very popular New York City radio talk show host who was in hot competition shock jock Howard Stern. Imus found my stuff genuinely funny but said my offbeat material wouldn’t be a good fit for his program. I also did a little amateur standup, and also had a 2-1/2 minute comedy radio spot that broadcast every Friday night out of a radio station in Atlantic City, New Jersey.

I’m  still regarded by friends and family as a funny man whose wacko jokes and quips often elicit sidesplitting laughter. One of the problems with my standup routine delivery was that I would often find my own jokes so funny that I would go into fits of laughter, thereby sabotaging my performance by stealing my own thunder. To this day my laughter can often be heard within the walls of my home as I regularly come up with new comedic ideas that cause me to chortle, cackle and slap my knees throughout the day. More than one friend has told me that that I’d do a good job of keeping myself amused if I were ever thrown into solitary confinement.

As the saying goes, you can’t judge a book by its cover.

Well thank you for sharing. I would love to see more of this side of you. I apologize for judging you based only on a narrow view I have had of you here.

[Teancum]

7 hours ago, california boy said:

I wanted to thank you for posting this link to the interview.  I have never listened to John Delhin before.  I just thought John Delhin was an angry ex-Mormon trying to expose ugly things about the Church.  Maybe he is that.  I don't really know since this is my first time listening to one of his podcasts.  What I do know is that in at least this podcast, I found him to want to understand why this former bishop left the Church.  I found Nick and his wife Amanda to be very believable and authentic about where they came from and how they got to this point.  After listening to him, it is hard to believe some of the things that have been said about him on this board.  I guess since I have listened to this podcast, I should investigate what horrible things he has said on TicTok.  I know most of you will never give him the time to explain himself.  But at least Teddy has given me the opportunity to just click and see what he has to say unfiltered by either side of the judgements of others.  

Dehlin is a mixed bag for many.  He does not portray at all as an angry ex mo. But if you only know of him based on what the believers here have to say about him you would conclude he is the Anti-Christ.  Personally, I can say back in 2077/2008 when I was a bishop goign through a faith crisis I reached out to John and he was very compassionate and caring and supportive.  That was the early days of Mormon Stories.  But when I felt all alone he was someone I could talk to. He was still navigating his own faith crisis issues.  So I do have a soft spot in my heart for him.

[Tacenda]

I can't remember which poster mentioned this, but in the middle of the podcast I think, they mention they felt so guilty that they messed around (petting only) before their temple marriage. But in reality came to realize it wasn't as horrible as they thought, but in their lives have been taught to feel guilty and shame in the church. So nothing like going all the way at all.  

ETA: Oh, I found it on this page by @Maestrophil. Hope this clears things up.

copy/paste of the quote by Maestrophil below:

"Also - I believe that he insinuates that somewhere in teh long interview he discusses that he and his wife had morality problems that he never felt free/forgiven for - and talks about what his past negative church experiences are - plus he had been struggling with his faith pre-being called to be a bishop, and his wife as well."

Edited February 3, 2024 by Tacenda

[bluebell]

14 hours ago, Amulek said:

Absolutely horrible. With him having gone through something like that I can understand him not wanting his kids to be involved in sleep-overs of any kind.

I've noticed that has become more common. Kids get together for 'late-overs' now. When I was a kid we used to spend the night at friend's houses all the time. Sure, we would sometimes sneak out and get into a little mischief, but nothing scandalous ever happened. I'm grateful for having lived such a charmed life where I was able to enjoy those types of activities without any concern for something like that ever happening. I wish that had been his experience as well - I'm saddened it wasn't.

 

The world is such a different place now, especially with almost all kids have access to the internet and many without any adult supervision.  I'm also sad that my kids won't get to experience the same fun stuff I got to do growing up.

[bluebell]

2 hours ago, Teancum said:

Dehlin is a mixed bag for many.  He does not portray at all as an angry ex mo. But if you only know of him based on what the believers here have to say about him you would conclude he is the Anti-Christ.  Personally, I can say back in 2077/2008 when I was a bishop goign through a faith crisis I reached out to John and he was very compassionate and caring and supportive.  That was the early days of Mormon Stories.  But when I felt all alone he was someone I could talk to. He was still navigating his own faith crisis issues.  So I do have a soft spot in my heart for him.

There are a couple of ex-members who post here who can't stand him either, so it's not just the believers that don't like him.

For myself, his track record with women is pretty bad, and he comes across as self important to me.  But I'd probably listen to some of his podcasts if they didn't go on for 3+ hours.

[Tacenda]

2 minutes ago, bluebell said:

The world is such a different place now, especially with almost all kids have access to the internet and many without any adult supervision.  I'm also sad that my kids won't get to experience the same fun stuff I got to do growing up.

My kids for the most part had some sleepovers, but it was told over the pulpit to not allow them in some stakes and wards so they slowly faded out in my kid's neighborhood. Which is probably a good thing. 

I remember sleep overs growing up where we'd be out walking the streets in neighborhoods and everyone else asleep. Nothing terrible, just the toilet paper thing. But sleeping out under the stars too, and inside the homes with sleeping bags candy/movies/scary stories/pranks. But I guess not all sleepovers were sweet and innocent, sadly. I guess the 60'70'80's and before, were innocent times for the most part, we did grow up in a sublime time. And parents couldn't call/text us haha. We were free from sun up to sun down in the summers. I don't even see neighborhood kids playing night games anymore. Hopefully this still happens and kids aren't on Social Media, or playing video games only.

 

[Tacenda]

9 minutes ago, bluebell said:

There are a couple of ex-members who post here who can't stand him either, so it's not just the believers that don't like him.

For myself, his track record with women is pretty bad, and he comes across as self important to me.  But I'd probably listen to some of his podcasts if they didn't go on for 3+ hours.

I think they need to streamline their podcasts, speaking of John and his wife Margi (sp?), and others that interview with John. I usually skip watching anymore, unless I'm compelled to. 

Edited February 3, 2024 by Tacenda

[Teancum]

23 hours ago, bluebell said:

There are a couple of ex-members who post here who can't stand him either, so it's not just the believers that don't like him.

That is true.  @ttribeis not a fan.  That's ok.

23 hours ago, bluebell said:

For myself, his track record with women is pretty bad, and he comes across as self important to me.  But I'd probably listen to some of his podcasts if they didn't go on for 3+ hours.

John like any human is a mixed bag.  I am aware of critical claims against him regarding women. Whether they are accurate or not I do not know as I have not been interested enough to drill into it.  It is though a bit of a where there is smoke there is fire thing.  I am not a John D apologist at all.  I listen to podcasts that interest me.  Others I skip. 

[Teancum]

On 2/3/2024 at 11:18 AM, Tacenda said:

I can't remember which poster mentioned this, but in the middle of the podcast I think, they mention they felt so guilty that they messed around (petting only) before their temple marriage. But in reality came to realize it wasn't as horrible as they thought, but in their lives have been taught to feel guilty and shame in the church. So nothing like going all the way at all.  

ETA: Oh, I found it on this page by @Maestrophil. Hope this clears things up.

copy/paste of the quote by Maestrophil below:

"Also - I believe that he insinuates that somewhere in teh long interview he discusses that he and his wife had morality problems that he never felt free/forgiven for - and talks about what his past negative church experiences are - plus he had been struggling with his faith pre-being called to be a bishop, and his wife as well."

Yes what I bolded above is correct. I just heard that in the part of the interview I am at.  Still have about an hour and a half left.

Edited February 4, 2024 by Teancum

[Maestrophil]

On 2/4/2024 at 9:50 AM, Teancum said:

Yes what I bolded above is correct. I just heard that in the part of the interview I am at.  Still have about an hour and a half left.

I'm just now getting more into hearing all of it - and even though he didn't 'go all the way" he did make out with his now wife WHILE he was a missionary, and WHILE she was 16!  Yikes!