My condolances for the struggle you are facing. I know that is is hard to see your children use thier agency in ways you fear might hurt them someday.
When my children stopped being active (they all are inactive to varying degrees), each case made me feel a little sad - and dissapointed in myself as a parent.
The following realizations helped me - don't know if they will be helpful for you, but here goes 🙂
- If our goal is to become like our Heavenly Father, and He is the perfect parent. Then what should I do to be like him? He gives us our agency, lets us fall, and then loves us unconditionally and promises to be there whenever we turn to him. Period. I try to do that too now.
- His children choosing poorly does not diminish the intergrity or goodness of God, so why should I feel diminished by the choices my children make after having done my best to impart wisdom to them in thier youth?
- The arc of eternity bends towards salvation for most, and I have come to trust that my children are really HIS children, and He will work his plan for them in His time.
Hope some of that can help. Blessings to you and your family!