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Everything posted by bsjkki

  1. It’s okay now to question someone might change their self identity for reasons of self interest? Good to know. I’m sure no one has ever done that before. 🤦‍♀️
  2. We can agree that his father and family has much to do with this. Complete dysfunction. It is implied they changed their name to disassociate from the dad. To the point the mom told the dad they had committed suicide and were dead. The dad states they called him and were angry with him.
  3. More on the dad…total messed up family but let’s blame the church and Republicans. So irresponsible and sowing hate with insane accusations of causation but it’s okay if it’s against your enemies. That’s what I’ve been getting from this thread. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11463995/Colorado-club-killers-porn-star-dad-worried-son-gay-heard-massacre.html
  4. The dad is nuts. Seems higher than a kite. But, go ahead and smear half the country…make sure you subscribe (politicizing this tragedy to get gain) and blame Republicans and Christians. I found his ‘take’ on this politicized garbage and find it disgusting he’s using it to push his very political agenda.
  5. Grateful to the heroes that took down this monster. They acted and saved countless lives. It’s very sad reading about the lives lost.
  6. The meetinghouses have been hit before. https://www.deseret.com/faith/2021/10/30/22749444/church-vandalism-is-on-the-rise-how-congregations-heal-catholic-bishops-usccb-arson-hate-crimes
  7. I blame all arson/graffiti and violence against the church on hateful rhetoric from ex-mo reddit and those who publicly express concerns about the church. (This is how it's done, right?)
  8. More about his family life…but go ahead and blame the church. https://heavy.com/news/nicholas-brink/ The accusations of causation here with church teachings are not responsible.
  9. Club Q shooting suspect's mother has criminal past | 9news.com This was an unstable individual from an unstable family. I think it a stretch to blame the church for what happened. It would be nice to wait to find out what his motive was before jumping to conclusions. He made bomb threats and was suicidal because his grandparents were moving. COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo — The mother of Anderson Lee Aldrich, the suspect in the Club Q shooting, has three outstanding warrants for her arrest out of California and an arson charge out of Bexar County, Texas (San Antonio). That arson charge was reduced to a lesser charge. Laura Lea Voepel, 45, was sentenced to five years of probation in Aug. 2013 and did not complete the probation terms, which were set to expire Aug. 2018, according to court records obtained by The Gazette.
  10. Call the Red Cross. They can provide assistance. Each unit may be provided some immediate assistance. They can staff/run a shelter as the need exists. They will have a case opened and help coordinate resources.
  11. I don’t think my daughter in law needs to have any contact with her father in jail. Sometimes it would be easier to minister to a stranger than minister to someone who has hurt you immensely and others in your family. Where the emotional toll of any contact is deeply distressing. None of this is cut and dried.
  12. Well, my sister in life believes it’s her job to do this with her extended family so no one likes to be around her. She has let me know she doesn’t like my daughter in laws clothing choices (has no desire to build a relationship with someone like her) and that our religion is wrong. I can hate the sin and love the sinner some of the time. Probably not all of the time. Probably depends on the relationship importance and the ‘sin.’ I love my kids even when I don’t like their choices. They don’t approve of mine. Agreeing to disagree is an okay thing. So the answer to the original question is ‘sometimes.’
  13. Everything is subjective. We are all drawing mini lines, fences, boundaries in different places. Maybe it’s like in high school where I refused to attend any parties with alcohol with my friends. I still loved my friends but didn’t want to be around illegal drinking. My husband would attend the parties but not drink and drove his friends home. Neither of us approved of the drinking but we still loved our friends. Now, if those friends ridiculed us for our stances, that would have caused a division. The ‘sin’ wasn't the issue. My ward is toxic for my family so we have gone elsewhere. It’s not toxic for everyone and not much ‘sin’ is involved. I think a toxic relationship brings out the worst in you or causes harm. A subjective term for sure.
  14. I think as they directly cause harm to others, yes, but I like the concepts in California Boy’s post. I view these as more than ‘sins.’ Most are illegal as I think his qualifier covers these things. A lot of his post resonated with me as I’ve been reading books on boundaries. Instead of focusing on others issues, it focuses things back on me and how I react. I should be more focused my own sins because we have no control over other peoples. I should have ‘charity’ for people and their struggles. Again, that means you don’t need to have toxic people in your life. Part of a proper boundary is knowing what not to put up with.
  15. A different take. My sister in law doesn’t believe in the ‘just love them’ advice most of us get to as our children leave the church. She is Catholic and draws different lines than I do. She believes you must be vocal and oppose your children’s bad or wrong choices. I choose to maintain relationships. My kids know what I believe. It’s not a secret. She chooses to be vocal and has alienated many family members. The irony is the choices I get sad about…i.e drinking alcohol, is not a sin in her mind. So, her son under age drinking is no big deal for her where if my daughter started drinking, I would be devastated. I would attend a gay wedding, she would not. I believe some exceptions for abortion should exist, she does not. What is a ‘sin?’ It depends on your beliefs.
  16. Why do you believe she hates transgenders? She admitted she was misinformed in her statement about Joseph Smith and researched further.
  17. Thank you!!!!! We had a wedding this weekend and could not watch. These notes were wonderful.
  18. I think providing a safe alternative for trans women is appropriate but penises don’t belong in women’s locker rooms. It creates a less safe environment for women and girls.
  19. It’s a locker room debate and it is a real issue and women and girls have female only spaces for good reasons of safety. Penises should not be allowed in female only locker rooms. Perverts (trans or cis) take advantage of these policies. Quit mocking women and girls who don’t want to change in front of a biological male or be exposed to penises in a female only space. https://www.wcax.com/2022/09/28/randolph-high-school-investigating-gender-locker-room-dispute/ I love how are the voices of women and girls are completely ignored and dismissed.
  20. https://www.outkick.com/mormon-recruit-left-byu-oregon-early-chant/
  21. My advice is to prayerfully consider what is best for your kids. There is the concept of ‘diminishing’ returns. If you do everything planned for the youth, it can become overwhelming.
  22. ****Language warning!!!! I guess this is ‘okay?’ And it’s on tape. The comments were also interesting. They were asked to stop and they did.
  23. When dealing with health issues, people often don’t get it or understand. I’ve been working on boundaries with this issue. I set my boundaries and then try and not get frustrated or mad when people don’t understand or don’t get them. It’s okay for people to ask me to do something or expect more of me or a family member. I can just say ‘no.’ I would often, in the past, get frustrated or feel I had to convince the person. Or share enough for them to ‘get it.’ I’ve learned they don’t get it so my job is not to get mad or frustrated or convince them of the legitimacy of my response. I am generally a ‘rule’ follower and would get sad frustrated with leaders setting up people for failure. Like the time they wanted the youth to read the Book of Mormon for a challenge, the New Testament for seminary and the D&C in Sunday School. Instead of being frustrated I should have counseled my children to ask God what they should focus on and follow that direction. With my autistic and type 1 teen the list of rude, ignorant and unsympathetic, judgy comments is long. I have gotten better but still have trouble when it involves my kids. But, it is better for me to set boundaries and shrug it off thinking ‘they don’t know what they don’t know.’ (I still fail at this too often) My husband, he deals with chronic testicle pain. My answer there if people push is, if you really want to know why he is out of commission at times I will tell you. As my teen daughter would say, ‘ I’m really tired of talking about my dad’s nuts!’ *to be completely honest here. It’s easier to be anonymous at times to let it all go. We fled our ward and sit in the back of a neighboring ward and now keep to ourselves. The wounds are deep and not healed and we need a bit of time away from expectations to regroup. It’s been very nice to sit in the back, take the sacrament and listen to strangers give talks. I feel safe.
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