Conflicting advice from Leaders

[Duncan]

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on it. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

Edited February 29, 2016 by Duncan

[pogi]

8 minutes ago, Duncan said:

Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

Yep.

[Jeanne]

34 minutes ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on itt. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

Duncan..this is how I felt when the essays came out..the past 40 years I was told one thing...then all of it was gone or changed or like your experience just different. Many here will say to pray and get your own answer..and this is good..but really, it all comes down to what answer touches you the most..instinct..common sense and or I like Pogi;s reply,,,yep.

[rockpond]

47 minutes ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on itt. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

John 14:26

The Spirit is supposed to be teaching us "all things".

[The Nehor]

50 minutes ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on it. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

Appeal to higher authority to solve the dilemma, preferably the very top.

[Hamba Tuhan]

1 hour ago, Duncan said:

One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different.

Wait, you don't want the option of leaders being inspired to give counsel specific to particular people, times and, circumstances?

[Rain]

I figure one or both didn't have a full understanding. If the subject matters to me I will search through scriptures and talks and pray about it. If not really I just let it go.

[VideoGameJunkie]

Up until the essays came out, I was told my whole church life by leaders and parents that Joseph Smith was a monogamist and that polygamy being practiced was mainly a Brigham Young practiced thing. I was shocked when the essays about Joseph's polygamy came out because I had been taught one thing by my local leaders and saw no source saying that he practiced polygamy until the essays and then that's where I learned how he practiced it. Since the essay came out, my leaders instead say Joseph never had any sexual relations with any of his polygamous wives, and only knew Emma in his whole life. Only 1 sex partner.

Edited March 1, 2016 by VideoGameJunkie

[mfbukowski]

2 hours ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on it. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

Hey look what I found!

Quote

 

 4 And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.

 5 And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know thetruth of all things.

 

 

Quote

⁵ If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

Quote

Not every statement made by a Church leader, past or present, necessarily constitutes doctrine. A single statement made by a single leader on a single occasion often represents a personal, though well-considered, opinion, but is not meant to be officially binding for the whole Church.

 

Edited March 1, 2016 by mfbukowski

[Duncan]

2 hours ago, Hamba Tuhan said:

Wait, you don't want the option of leaders being inspired to give counsel specific to particular people, times and, circumstances?

 

but what if it's like get married now and someone else is like you get married when you find the right person, one is a frantic search and the other is more cool and calculated, like real world repercussions for the here and now

[Mars]

5 minutes ago, Duncan said:

 

but what if it's like get married now and someone else is like you get married when you find the right person, one is a frantic search and the other is more cool and calculated, like real world repercussions for the here and now

matters of marriage are definitely ones that you should do what you think is best.  half the fun of following advice is knowing what advice sucks and what advice is good.

[Hamba Tuhan]

10 minutes ago, Duncan said:

but what if it's like get married now and someone else is like you get married when you find the right person ...

I don't see the presumed conflict.

[Duncan]

1 minute ago, Hamba Tuhan said:

I don't see the presumed conflict.

you have to get married now!! God said so (so you settle or jump into stuff that in the long term are not beneficial to you) or someone else saying, get married when you meet the right person and you know the right

[Robert F. Smith]

2 hours ago, VideoGameJunkie said:

Up until the essays came out, I was told my whole church life by leaders and parents that Joseph Smith was a monogamist and that polygamy being practiced was mainly a Brigham Young practiced thing. I was shocked when the essays about Joseph's polygamy came out because I had been taught one thing by my local leaders and saw no source saying that he practiced polygamy until the essays and then that's where I learned how he practiced it. Since the essay came out, my leaders instead say Joseph never had any sexual relations with any of his polygamous wives, and only knew Emma in his whole life. Only 1 sex partner.

I've never been in a ward or stake in which there existed such head-in-sand leaders.  Very odd, Junkie.  Very odd.

[Robert F. Smith]

4 hours ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on it. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

What would truly worry me would be if leaders all said the same (or nearly the same) thing on any given subject.

[VideoGameJunkie]

37 minutes ago, Robert F. Smith said:

I've never been in a ward or stake in which there existed such head-in-sand leaders.  Very odd, Junkie.  Very odd.

Ya the worst part was I defended Joseph Smith being a monogimist and it being anti Mormon lies that he was a polygamist to all my non member friends. When the essay came out I looked like a liar.

[BCSpace]

6 hours ago, Duncan said:

I was telling the elders here about a zone conference that I had had when I was out about a certain subject and the President explained his views on it. One of the elders had said his Bishop had told his youth group something opposite from what I was told. This is not the first time I have heard differing opinions from different leaders over time about various subjects. How are we to know what is true? One ward the Bishop could say something and then you move, go on a mission etc. and get told something completely different. Do you just say, the heck with i'll do what I think is best or what?

You look at the officially published doctrine (of latest date).  If it's not found in the doctrine, then perhaps it's a case of not being necessary for God to command in all things or perhaps it's a case of someone doing their best to parse the situation with what they know. 

It's also possible that someone does not know what doctrine is; the Church says it's everything they officially publish and of latest date to account for continuing revelation/inspiration. So someone may have used the unofficial works of an apostle etc. and is teaching it as doctrine.

Once you have determined the source as per the above, then it's up to you to decide if you're going to believe the Church's doctrine or not.

[mfbukowski]

2 hours ago, Duncan said:

 

but what if it's like get married now and someone else is like you get married when you find the right person, one is a frantic search and the other is more cool and calculated, like real world repercussions for the here and now

You pray about it and don't listen to anyone but your heart.

Why would you do otherwise?  Only you know what is best for you.

[sunstoned]

5 hours ago, Jeanne said:

Duncan..this is how I felt when the essays came out..the past 40 years I was told one thing...then all of it was gone or changed or like your experience just different. Many here will say to pray and get your own answer..and this is good..but really, it all comes down to what answer touches you the most..instinct..common sense and or I like Pogi;s reply,,,yep.

The very same thing was experienced by my mother.  All her life she was taught certain things, then the essays came out and much of things she was taught and what she based her belief on was overturned.  To say the least her faith in the Q15 was shaken. 

[Glenn101]

5 hours ago, VideoGameJunkie said:

Up until the essays came out, I was told my whole church life by leaders and parents that Joseph Smith was a monogamist and that polygamy being practiced was mainly a Brigham Young practiced thing. I was shocked when the essays about Joseph's polygamy came out because I had been taught one thing by my local leaders and saw no source saying that he practiced polygamy until the essays and then that's where I learned how he practiced it. Since the essay came out, my leaders instead say Joseph never had any sexual relations with any of his polygamous wives, and only knew Emma in his whole life. Only 1 sex partner.

May I ask were you raised in a predominantly LDS culture? I still find it astounding that people who have been members of the church for long periods of time were unaware of Joseph Smith's polygamy. Here in the Bible belt, that is one of the things that missionaries were dealing with on a regular basis, i.e. questions about Joseph Smith and polygamy.

My current wife's mother who lived in Hickory, N.C. was taking the discussions when she (my wife) was in her mid teens. My wife was interested at one point. until some of her friends told her about Mormons and polygamy. This was long before the internet. I will not say how long ago because I value my hide and would not want to incur feminine wrath over an age disclosure.

My mother was the one who told me about it. She did not blink an eye, because she had a testimony that Joseph Smith was a prophet. She was literate and read the Bible, the Old Testament, about Abraham, Israel, David, etc. She did not find it strange that latter day prophets could practice polygamy when commanded by the Lord.

Glenn

[VideoGameJunkie]

13 minutes ago, Glenn101 said:

May I ask were you raised in a predominantly LDS culture? I still find it astounding that people who have been members of the church for long periods of time were unaware of Joseph Smith's polygamy. Here in the Bible belt, that is one of the things that missionaries were dealing with on a regular basis, i.e. questions about Joseph Smith and polygamy.

My current wife's mother who lived in Hickory, N.C. was taking the discussions when she (my wife) was in her mid teens. My wife was interested at one point. until some of her friends told her about Mormons and polygamy. This was long before the internet. I will not say how long ago because I value my hide and would not want to incur feminine wrath over an age disclosure.

My mother was the one who told me about it. She did not blink an eye, because she had a testimony that Joseph Smith was a prophet. She was literate and read the Bible, the Old Testament, about Abraham, Israel, David, etc. She did not find it strange that latter day prophets could practice polygamy when commanded by the Lord.

Glenn

I was raised in a family with a non member dad and a mormon mom. My mom always told me Joseph Smith only was married to Emma like my Boston leaders said. When the essays came out my mom said Joseph only had 1 sex partner his whole life and that was Emma and all others were eternity only sealings.

[Glenn101]

23 minutes ago, VideoGameJunkie said:

I was raised in a family with a non member dad and a mormon mom. My mom always told me Joseph Smith only was married to Emma like my Boston leaders said. When the essays came out my mom said Joseph only had 1 sex partner his whole life and that was Emma and all others were eternity only sealings.

I perceive that you love, respect, and trust your mother greatly. And I think that is wonderful.

Now that you have found out that Joseph may have had conjugal relations with some of his polygamous wives, what are your thoughts?

How did you come to a belief in the Gospel? I.E. based upon your mother's testimony, or have you had some type of spiritual confirmation of your own?

If those questions are too personal to you, tell me to back off. Or if the mods think I am getting too personal, tell me. I do not want to be offensive.

Thanks,

Glenn

[VideoGameJunkie]

16 minutes ago, Glenn101 said:

I perceive that you love, respect, and trust your mother greatly. And I think that is wonderful.

Now that you have found out that Joseph may have had conjugal relations with some of his polygamous wives, what are your thoughts?

How did you come to a belief in the Gospel? I.E. based upon your mother's testimony, or have you had some type of spiritual confirmation of your own?

If those questions are too personal to you, tell me to back off. Or if the mods think I am getting too personal, tell me. I do not want to be offensive.

Thanks,

Glenn

I grew up with my testimony always trying to follow in my mom's footsteps. I wanted to be as spiritual as her. I had my first real spiritual moment when I was 16 getting my patriarchal blessing. During it is was strongly feeling a Godly presence and I've had a testimony since. When I found out Joseph had more than 1 sex partner I felt like I was a liar to my non member friends on the subject based on what I'd been telling them before. I felt embarassed.

[Rivers]

8 hours ago, VideoGameJunkie said:

Up until the essays came out, I was told my whole church life by leaders and parents that Joseph Smith was a monogamist and that polygamy being practiced was mainly a Brigham Young practiced thing. I was shocked when the essays about Joseph's polygamy came out because I had been taught one thing by my local leaders and saw no source saying that he practiced polygamy until the essays and then that's where I learned how he practiced it. Since the essay came out, my leaders instead say Joseph never had any sexual relations with any of his polygamous wives, and only knew Emma in his whole life. Only 1 sex partner.

Interesting. I was never specifically told that Joseph wasn't a polygamist. I actually first learned of Joseph's polygamy from my seminary teacher.

[Robert F. Smith]

16 hours ago, VideoGameJunkie said:

Ya the worst part was I defended Joseph Smith being a monogimist and it being anti Mormon lies that he was a polygamist to all my non member friends. When the essay came out I looked like a liar.

That's life, Junkie.  We all have to take our hits.  Just be glad you're making progress.