cursor Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 Now that sounds pretty redundant doesn't it? My older brother, Holden (64 years old, birthday just around the corner, March 21st), was shot and killed early yesterday morning (in Orem UT) by a crazed grandson of his long-term common-law wife. He was first shot with a shotgun (no words were exchanged), then shot twice after the fact. The kid (24 years old) then retreated to his bedroom and shot himself to death with the same shotgun. I cannot at all understand the stupidity. My wife and I will be driving to UT this weekend for whatever funeral arrangements there might be.
bluebell Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 Oh my gosh cursor i'm so sorry. It's like the youth today have no idea how to handle conflict...
MorningStar Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 I'm so sorry. This is the worst kind of grief.
Calm Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 My older brother, Holden (64 years old, birthday just around the corner, March 21st), was shot and killed early yesterday morning (in Orem UT) by a crazed grandson of his long-term common-law wife. He was first shot with a shotgun (no words were exchanged), then shot twice after the fact. The kid (24 years old) then retreated to his bedroom and shot himself to death with the same shotgun.This is so very heartbreaking to read.
sheilauk Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 My deepest condolences and prayers, cursor. Such a tragic loss of life can be difficult to comprehend. I hope you and your family will come to terms with it and find peace.
cursor Posted February 19, 2015 Author Posted February 19, 2015 (edited) Imagine, if you can, how my 90 year old Dad must feel. It very tearfully pains me. Had a good, constructive chat with Matthew (my next brother down from me ... there are eight brothers, followed by a youngest daughter) today. I'll be hugging them all this coming weekend (driving in from Southern California). Edited February 19, 2015 by cursor
Kenngo1969 Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 (edited) Condolences for your loss. May you and your family, eventually, find "the peace that surpasseth all understanding." -Ken Edited February 20, 2015 by Kenngo1969
Garden Girl Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Cursor, I am so very sorry... how tragic...Being with your brothers/sister will cushion the situation I hope... GG
Tacenda Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 (edited) You just don't know what goes on in kid's heads. Or what sets them off.I'm so sorry for your loss, I'm glad for your family's faith of an afterlife. Edited February 20, 2015 by Tacenda
Avatar4321 Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 I'm so sorry to hear that. My heart and prayers go out to you and your family
JLHPROF Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Oh, that's so close to home. You have my prayers and my sincere condolences.I am so sorry for your loss.
ERayR Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 So sorry. The unexpected loss of a loved one is so difficult.
cursor Posted February 26, 2015 Author Posted February 26, 2015 (edited) On Saturday we had a joint, very low key, family-circle meeting wherein we all had opportunity to verbally recall what Holden's life meant. At times it was painful, yet at other times we smiled, and even laughed ... recalling specifics.Hell ... when he was just 17 years old, he brought home a squirrel monkey (and kept it locked up in his upper bedroom ... with no "litter-box"). Shortly thereafter Holden left home. I got his bedroom. Yeah, Baby! Then I saw what the monkey left behind in the upper closet. OK ... I was just 16 years old. I hauled up the end of a long hose, through the second story casement window ... and blasted the hell outta that monkey-dung covered upper closet ... ... with no thought for where the resultant flow would end up ... There were lots of stories like that. Plenty of laughs, which is good. On Sunday we gathered at my [next down] brother's home at about 38th South SLC. Dad and his wife were simply too worn out to attend (they even dodged church attendance that day ... a huge rarity). We had some good laughs about life in general, and some about the light that Holden shed on each of us. In the end, what can we reasonably do for loved ones who have passed on? Edited February 26, 2015 by cursor 2
cursor Posted February 26, 2015 Author Posted February 26, 2015 Riley, the 24 year old killer had his funeral this last Monday. Of about 100 attendees, 50% were paintballers (it's what he did for a [partial] living, while living with[off] Grandma). Dad's second wife (mother of nine) attended, cause that's simply how sweet she is. 1
rodheadlee Posted March 1, 2015 Posted March 1, 2015 I'm sorry for you loss Cursor, I'll be praying for your family.
cursor Posted March 3, 2015 Author Posted March 3, 2015 (edited) It's taking a serious emotional toll — on very many of us. Hopefully I'll get my ducks in a row soon. In the meantime, it's really hard. Thanks for all the kind wishes from family, friends, and even strangers. Edited March 3, 2015 by cursor
cursor Posted March 3, 2015 Author Posted March 3, 2015 (edited) Dad seems better adjusted than I (with regard to this current event), for whatever reason. I think that he sees the event in some sort of historical sequence ... one not necessarily planned, but it's over. It's a done thing. Move on. I have a difficult time [simply] dealing with the loss in such [simple] terms. Perhaps it's related to the fact that he's 90+ years old and sees the opportunity of reuniting with Holden in some very near future. I don't personally share that sentiment. I'm 62, and don't plan on going anywhere soon. I'm currently examining my personal relationships with each and every of my siblings. I sincerely wish that I'd somehow connected more than I did with Holden. Extend that sentiment to Stan, Marty, Bob, Joe, Matt, Jeff, and Stacy. Earthly life is indeed short. Edited March 4, 2015 by cursor
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