Honorary Temple Recommend

[rodheadlee]

Too bad you can't get an honorary Temple recommend for being married 50 years. 50th Anniversary coming up November 30th. Too bad I can't quit smoking.

[longview]

Does your wife keep the Word of Wisdom?

[rpn]

ETA: Not saying it will be easy.  Just saying you can do it.

Edited November 14, 2023 by rpn

[bluebell]

Happy anniversary!  50 years is amazing. 

[blackstrap]

I'm told that it is harder to give up nicotine than heroine, not that I am suggesting you switch over .lol. A friend said he could stop smoking whenever he wanted. He said he has done it dozens of times. 😀

May the Lord bless you ,rodheadlee .

[Calm]

3 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

Too bad you can't get an honorary Temple recommend for being married 50 years. 50th Anniversary coming up November 30th. Too bad I can't quit smoking.

I know you have tried hard to give them up in the past. I hope you can do it some day.
 

I know what it is like to be physically dependent on a drug.  I had my worst panic attack, thought I was dying, last time I tried to go off of it for only 24 hours just so I could switch to a better drug (turned out insurance wouldn’t pay for it as I was not an actual addict and just someone who was trying to have a more functional life , so not sure I could have stayed on it anyway; I never had that type of reaction with it before when I had to go off of it to try other drugs that might help; I have been trying to lower my usage in other ways and it’s not been fun).  I feel quite betrayed by my body at times, stopping me from doing what’s best for it yet again.

I cannot imagine what it must be to be fully addicted.  I am sorry you have to carry that burden for now.  
 

Have you been able to go to specialists to see if they have any recommendations or new medications that might be able to help?  Your situation in the past might not have given you access to such, both with traveling and living out of the US at times as well as self employment, but I assume you are on Medicare now given the 50 years and perhaps they cover this (would be intelligent to do so).

Edited November 13, 2023 by Calm

[rodheadlee]

5 hours ago, longview said:

Does your wife keep the Word of Wisdom?

No. We are equal opportunity abusers. If I quit she would follow me.

Edited November 14, 2023 by rodheadlee

[rodheadlee]

2 hours ago, Calm said:

I know you have tried hard to give them up in the past. I hope you can do it some day.
 

I know what it is like to be physically dependent on a drug.  I had my worst panic attack, thought I was dying, last time I tried to go off of it for only 24 hours just so I could switch to a better drug (turned out insurance wouldn’t pay for it as I was not an actual addict and just someone who was trying to have a more functional life , so not sure I could have stayed on it anyway; I never had that type of reaction with it before when I had to go off of it to try other drugs that might help; I have been trying to lower my usage in other ways and it’s not been fun).  I feel quite betrayed by my body at times, stopping me from doing what’s best for it yet again.

I cannot imagine what it must be to be fully addicted.  I am sorry you have to carry that burden for now.  
 

Have you been able to go to specialists to see if they have any recommendations or new medications that might be able to help?  Your situation in the past might not have given you access to such, both with traveling and living out of the US at times as well as self employment, but I assume you are on Medicare now given the 50 years and perhaps they cover this (would be intelligent to do so).

It's been awhile since I talked to my doctor about it. They put me on one drug that was supposed to remove the desire to smoke but it gave me suicidal thoughts. Which was one of the side effects

[rodheadlee]

The missionaries came by today. At the end of our lesson they wanted to give me a blessing but I turned it down. I have had several blessings for smoking addiction and I wanted to wait until I had a serious attempt to quit. I promised them I would go to church this coming Sunday as long as my physical situation allows it. I have to have surgery for a upper abdominal hernia, we first thought it was a tumor. To quote Arnold Schwarzenegger in kindergarten cop "it's not a tuma"

Edited November 14, 2023 by rodheadlee

[Calm]

1 minute ago, rodheadlee said:

It's been awhile since I talked to my doctor about it. They put me on one drug that was supposed to remove the desire to smoke but it gave me suicidal thoughts. Which was one of the side effects

Been there.  Kind of discourages you from trying again.  But I have had recent quite good success with a drug I had even tried before that had no effect in the past (works on a newer problem I am guessing), so I would encourage you trying again.

[Tacenda]

Happy 50th Wedding Anniversary rodheadlee! ❤️ 

Now about the smoking, I'm wondering and thinking you've probably done this already, but have you tried hypnotism to take the desire away? 

Edited November 14, 2023 by Tacenda

[manol]

9 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

Too bad you can't get an honorary Temple recommend for being married 50 years. 50th Anniversary coming up November 30th. Too bad I can't quit smoking.

I hereby extend total unconditional acceptance to you and your wife exactly as you are.  No judgments, no demands, no strings attached.  No separation, only Re-Union.  The outer temple is the metaphor; the inner temple - the one INSIDE you - is where the presence of God is experienced. 

In my opinion.

Edited November 14, 2023 by manol

[Tacenda]

17 hours ago, manol said:

I hereby extend total unconditional acceptance to you and your wife exactly as you are.  No judgments, no demands, no strings attached.  No separation, only Re-Union.  The outer temple is the metaphor; the inner temple - the one INSIDE you - is where the presence of God is experienced. 

In my opinion.

I second that!

[Rain]

Congratulations on your marriage and I hope it goes well for your surgery. ❤

By the way, your wife and I share our first name so I always feel a connection when you talk about her.

[Calm]

Rod, have you ever gone through a temple open house with your wife to see sealing rooms, etc?  Maybe if the temple experience became more real to you that might help in some way.  I get that it might not be what’s needed, of course. It’s not a willpower thing. It is much more complicated. 

Edited November 15, 2023 by Calm

[MustardSeed]

For what it’s worth, you probably belong at the temple more than I do. 
I personally do not have a problem with your particular challenge.

Happy anniversary! 50 years is completely remarkable

[rodheadlee]

13 hours ago, Calm said:

Rod, have you ever gone through a temple open house with your wife to see sealing rooms, etc?  Maybe if the temple experience became more real to you that might help in some way.  I get that it might not be what’s needed, of course. It’s not a willpower thing. It is much more complicated. 

No, and that's a good idea. 

[rodheadlee]

On 11/13/2023 at 8:22 PM, Tacenda said:

Happy 50th Wedding Anniversary rodheadlee! ❤️ 

Now about the smoking, I'm wondering and thinking you've probably done this already, but have you tried hypnotism to take the desire away? 

Thank you. I have not tried hypnosis, that's a good idea. 

[rodheadlee]

So it looks like I have to quit smoking to get my hernia operation done. Now I have two reasons to quit smoking. Anyways I would appreciate some prayer towards that outcome. I'm down to four cigarettes a day but it's getting tough. Thanks for all your help appreciate you all. Happy Thanksgiving.

[Calm]

2 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

So it looks like I have to quit smoking to get my hernia operation done. Now I have two reasons to quit smoking. Anyways I would appreciate some prayer towards that outcome. I'm down to four cigarettes a day but it's getting tough. Thanks for all your help appreciate you all. Happy Thanksgiving.

Will pray for you.  Is the doctor helping out in any way?

[Calm]

You might try this app, I have heard it be recommended in a couple of more or less trustworthy places:

https://www.reveri.com

self hypnosis

It has a free trial period, I believe 

[Calm]

Also, have you thought about checking in once a day or more with an accountability partner (someone not your wife)?  Sometimes shame is useful as a motivator and thinking of embarrassment if you told someone you cheated that day can really help (it worked really well for me for exercising until I got too dopey to care, off that drug now, so debating whether to try again right away or wait till after holidays).  I wouldn’t use shame for trivial stuff as too easy to make shame itself the wrong kind of habit, but for more serious health issues…

Edited November 22, 2023 by Calm

[rodheadlee]

On 11/22/2023 at 3:18 PM, Calm said:

Also, have you thought about checking in once a day or more with an accountability partner (someone not your wife)?  Sometimes shame is useful as a motivator and thinking of embarrassment if you told someone you cheated that day can really help (it worked really well for me for exercising until I got too dopey to care, off that drug now, so debating whether to try again right away or wait till after holidays).  I wouldn’t use shame for trivial stuff as too easy to make shame itself the wrong kind of habit, but for more serious health issues…

I report to my dad everyday. I didn't do good today but I'll do great tomorrow. I just don't feel like buying anymore cigarettes.

[Tacenda]

18 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

I report to my dad everyday. I didn't do good today but I'll do great tomorrow. I just don't feel like buying anymore cigarettes.

YOU GOT THIS.

It took a semi recent heart attack to stop my brother who has smoked for a good portion of his life. 

[MustardSeed]

If you were a woman I’d be an additional accountability buddy.  A member here was a great accountability buddy for me and it changed my life.