Church Signs Deal With Adoption.com

[rockpond]

LDS Family Services just announced a deal with Adoption.com to provide free services to LDS couples.  They've also removed some of the previous restrictions which opens up LDSFS adoption assistance to more couples.  Good stuff.

 

http://ldsliving.com/story/78193?utm_source=ldsliving&utm_medium=email

[Rob Osborn]

From the article-

" Additional changes on the Church's end as part of the new arrangement also make LDS adoption accessible for more families. There are now only four criteria a potential LDS adoptive couple must meet:

1. Be sealed in the temple to your spouse 2. Have current temple recommends 3. Get a Bishop's recommendation 4. Complete an Adoption.com home study

Those familiar with LDS adoptions in the past will rejoice that some restrictive criteria, like medical documentation of infertility or a child limit of 2 per family, have been dropped."

[Teancum]

LDS Family Services just announced a deal with Adoption.com to provide free services to LDS couples.  They've also removed some of the previous restrictions which opens up LDSFS adoption assistance to more couples.  Good stuff.

 

http://ldsliving.com/story/78193?utm_source=ldsliving&utm_medium=email

 

 

Yes... I agree.

[pogi]

Wow, that is really great.  My wife and I were looking into LDSFS to adopt jsut before they announced that they are no longer offering that service.  The cost of adoption through LDSFS was around $15,000 cheaper than anywhere else we have found.  We simply can't afford $30,000 to adopt a child right now that most agencies charge.  It is nice that the church is covering the $200/month subscription fee, but I wonder if the overall expense is comparable to LDSFS.  That is something that I will have to look into.  Thanks for the info!

[tonie]

Not a bad deal for LDS families willing to adopt.

The Church covers the $199 monthly fee on adoption.com, and the members maintain basic Temple worthiness.

[tonie]

Wow, that is really great. My wife and I were looking into LDSFS to adopt jsut before they announced that they are no longer offering that service. The cost of adoption through LDSFS was around $15,000 cheaper than anywhere else we have found. We simply can't afford $30,000 to adopt a child right now that most agencies charge. It is nice that the church is covering the $200/month subscription fee, but I wonder if the overall expense is comparable to LDSFS. That is something that I will have to look into. Thanks for the info!

There just seems something inappropriate/wrong about a 30,000 pricetag on adoption.

[Derl Sanderson]

We got our three kids through LDSFS for about $800, $3000, and $4000. Of course these "kids" are now 36, 32, and 24, so it's been awhile. But God bless LDSFS for what they did in our otherwise childless lives and God bless Spencer Kimball. I believe it was he who changed the church's policy/practice of counseling unwed mothers to always marry the bio-dad regardless of the circumstances. We got our kids in the "closed adoption" era. I hope to some day meet their biological mothers and their families and try to somehow express the gratitude and respect my wife and I have for their heartache and sacrifice. It's beyond my comprehension what they did for us.

[Tacenda]

We got our three kids through LDSFS for about $800, $3000, and $4000. Of course these "kids" are now 36, 32, and 24, so it's been awhile. But God bless LDSFS for what they did in our otherwise childless lives and God bless Spencer Kimball. I believe it was he who changed the church's policy/practice of counseling unwed mothers to always marry the bio-dad regardless of the circumstances. We got our kids in the "closed adoption" era. I hope to some day meet their biological mothers and their families and try to somehow express the gratitude and respect my wife and I have for their heartache and sacrifice. It's beyond my comprehension what they did for us.

I'm totally stoked the church got back into this again to help so many couples, I know of several dealing with not being able to have children on their own.  But have seen some criticisms, of course from those disaffected on another board, that you must be a TR holder first.  And they say this is just to keep more card carrying saints in the church, for the purpose of revenue.  I know it's bad huh!!  Anyway, did you have to meet this criteria also back in the day of your adopting?  Which is awesome, three children, love it!

[Derl Sanderson]

Thanks for the kind words, Tacenda. Yes. The criteria was similar. When we began the process, I was still in graduate school and it was made clear to us that we wouldn't have final consideration until I was done with school and had a full-time job, which seems reasonable. As for requiring us to be TR holders, it is the position of the church that given our doctrine of pre-mortal life, every spirit coming to earth has an inherent right to be bound by temple covenants to a family. It's maybe a small thing in the eternal scheme, but certainly is consistent with our doctrine (and more ennobling than the dopey idea that we're just trying to assimilate more potential revenue-producers - sheesh!). I personally think that we don't scratch the surface of what Joseph conceived in wanting all God's children bound together by covenant!

[Scott Lloyd]

There just seems something inappropriate/wrong about a 30,000 pricetag on adoption.

What also seems wrong is how agonizingly difficult it is for hopeful adoptive parents to fulfill their dreams.

 

While interviewing to do a story on this event, I learned from the CEO of Adoption.com that for a typical family on Parent Profiles for 12 months, only 51 percent are likely to succeed. And that percentage is sure to go down now that more parents will be putting their profiles up due to this new partnership with LDS Family Services.

 

The sad fact is that across the country these days, only 1 percent of single expectant mothers will place a baby for adoption. With the erasure of the social stigma on out-of-wedlock pregnancy, more of them are choosing to keep their babies. That means far more children being raised in fatherless homes, a condition that drives all other social ills in society: poverty, crime, lack of educational and other opportunities, domestic turmoil, etc.

[hagoth7]

What also seems wrong is how agonizingly difficult it is for hopeful adoptive parents to fulfill their dreams.

 

While interviewing to do a story on this event, I learned from the CEO of Adoption.com that for a typical family on Parent Profiles for 12 months, only 51 percent are likely to succeed. And that percentage is sure to go down now that more parents will be putting their profiles up due to this new partnership with LDS Family Services.

 

The sad fact is that across the country these days, only 1 percent of single expectant mothers will place a baby for adoption. With the erasure of the social stigma on out-of-wedlock pregnancy, more of them are choosing to keep their babies. That means far more children being raised in fatherless homes, a condition that drives all other social ills in society: poverty, crime, lack of educational and other opportunities, domestic turmoil, etc.

My wife and I tried to work with LDS Family Services for about 5 years, but were never chosen by the birth mother for a child. So our next best option was foreign adoption. We consider it an enormous miracle that we were somehow able to raise the funds to adopt two children from another country.

[Scott Lloyd]

My wife and I tried to work with LDS Family Services for about 5 years, but were never chosen by the birth mother for a child. So our next best option was foreign adoption. We consider it an enormous miracle that we were somehow able to raise the funds to adopt two children from another country.

I know two LDS couples in a similar situation. Went through years of frustration and a ton of money before ultimately going abroad to adopt.

[Tacenda]

My wife and I tried to work with LDS Family Services for about 5 years, but were never chosen by the birth mother for a child. So our next best option was foreign adoption. We consider it an enormous miracle that we were somehow able to raise the funds to adopt two children from another country.

We have a few couples trying to adopt in our ward. Two of the families are barely able to scrape up funds, they both have adopted previously half white, half black babies. Two a piece because they weren't able to conceive their own children.

But the family I want to talk about had 3 of their own and wanted one more, I'm guessing for their only girl to have a little sister. Thus they were able to adopt a white healthy newborn girl to add to three siblings.

Does this seem very fair for couples to adopt and already have children they've conceived? Or is this a dumb question and it shouldn't matter really? ETA: I forgot! I have a good friend that adopted after having one child of her own and then unable to have anymore after that. So she has two children total. So I shouldn't think that if you have your own you shouldn't adopt.

Edited March 5, 2015 by Tacenda

[Scott Lloyd]

We have a few couples trying to adopt in our ward. Two of the families are barely able to scrape up funds, they both have adopted previously half white, half black babies. Two a piece because they weren't able to conceive their own children.

But the family I want to talk about had 3 of their own and wanted one more, I'm guessing for their only girl to have a little sister. Thus they were able to adopt a white healthy newborn girl to add to three siblings.

Does this seem very fair for couples to adopt and already have children they've conceived? Or is this a dumb question and it shouldn't matter really?

There's a lot about adoption that isn't fair.

 

I don't think it's fair that older couples are routinely passed over -- if not ruled ineligible altogether -- for adoption when they likely would make more fit parents because of their experience than would many younger couples.

 

it seems the birth mother has near-total control over who adopts her baby -- which is why the decisions are apt to be capricious.

 

Adoption.com feeds whims. The birth mother can select the adoptive parents on such factors as whether they like horses or whether they are musicians.

Edited March 4, 2015 by Scott Lloyd

[Scott Lloyd]

One of the reasons it's a shame that adoption is so costly is that scarce funds are eaten up in the process that otherwise would be available to parents in bringing up and educating the child once they are successful.

[Scott Lloyd]

Wow, that is really great.  My wife and I were looking into LDSFS to adopt jsut before they announced that they are no longer offering that service.  The cost of adoption through LDSFS was around $15,000 cheaper than anywhere else we have found.  We simply can't afford $30,000 to adopt a child right now that most agencies charge.  It is nice that the church is covering the $200/month subscription fee, but I wonder if the overall expense is comparable to LDSFS.  That is something that I will have to look into.  Thanks for the info!

LDSFS was cheaper, but according to what its representative told me, it was, in some measure, "get-what-you-pay-for." That is to say, LDSFS did not have the means or capability to provide hopeful adoptive parents with nearly the exposure to potential adoptions that Adoption.com can provide. By comparison, the exposure is greater "in multiples," I was told.

[Avatar4321]

I'm very grateful these new changes occurred. We need more children being adopted into strong families

[KevinG]

One of the reasons it's a shame that adoption is so costly is that scarce funds are eaten up in the process that otherwise would be available to parents in bringing up and educating the child once they are successful.

 

Here is an idea.  Pay the lawyers less and put at least 50% of the fees in a trust for the child's healthcare and education.

[toon]

There just seems something inappropriate/wrong about a 30,000 pricetag on adoption.

 

We went the foster care to adoption route.  Our only costs were for the livescan fingerprinting, physical exams, and whatever costs associated with obtaining certified birth certificates, marriage certificates, etc.

 

At the same time, it's a roller coaster process.  You have to work cooperate with birth parent visitation until parental rights have been terminated.  You have to deal with the antics of birth parents who have a range of issues, usually mental health and substance abuse.  And there's no guarantee, as the child you're caring for and hoping to adopt could be removed from your care at any time.

 

We had it relatively easy.  We didn't get into the process with the intent of adopting, only of helping out a relative with some problems.  However, it became clear early on that reunification with the birth parents was unlikely.  And luckily, the birth parents realized that to some extent and at least partially cooperated.

 

I have a friend, however, who had two infants removed from his care when long and distant relatives were discovered.  That took quite an emotional toll.

[Daniel2]

Sounds like a great move for many couples. Kudos to the church for making it easier for their membership to provide homes for children in need.

[rockpond]

We went the foster care to adoption route.  Our only costs were for the livescan fingerprinting, physical exams, and whatever costs associated with obtaining certified birth certificates, marriage certificates, etc.

 

At the same time, it's a roller coaster process.  You have to work cooperate with birth parent visitation until parental rights have been terminated.  You have to deal with the antics of birth parents who have a range of issues, usually mental health and substance abuse.  And there's no guarantee, as the child you're caring for and hoping to adopt could be removed from your care at any time.

 

We had it relatively easy.  We didn't get into the process with the intent of adopting, only of helping out a relative with some problems.  However, it became clear early on that reunification with the birth parents was unlikely.  And luckily, the birth parents realized that to some extent and at least partially cooperated.

 

I have a friend, however, who had two infants removed from his care when long and distant relatives were discovered.  That took quite an emotional toll.

 

I just have to say it... Foster parents are heroes!  Thank you for being one.  I've known a few and they have my utmost respect and admiration for the most amazing service the provide.

[bluebell]

We went the foster care to adoption route.  Our only costs were for the livescan fingerprinting, physical exams, and whatever costs associated with obtaining certified birth certificates, marriage certificates, etc.

 

At the same time, it's a roller coaster process.  You have to work cooperate with birth parent visitation until parental rights have been terminated.  You have to deal with the antics of birth parents who have a range of issues, usually mental health and substance abuse.  And there's no guarantee, as the child you're caring for and hoping to adopt could be removed from your care at any time.

 

We had it relatively easy.  We didn't get into the process with the intent of adopting, only of helping out a relative with some problems.  However, it became clear early on that reunification with the birth parents was unlikely.  And luckily, the birth parents realized that to some extent and at least partially cooperated.

 

I have a friend, however, who had two infants removed from his care when long and distant relatives were discovered.  That took quite an emotional toll.

 

I have an adopted sister who came to our family thru foster care.  She came to our family when she was 18 months old (i was 12) and was with us for four years before her birth mother decides to terminate her rights.  I can't imagine our family without her!