Traela Posted January 2, 2014 Posted January 2, 2014 My two cents are, yes, I support adoption in most cases if the parents are not going to form a viable marriage. I believe children are entitled to have parents they can be sealed to. I believe they are entitled to live with both parents, and to have an actual home, to not identify their place of residence as "my mom's house" or "my dad's house," or to have to say, "home is where my suitcase is." They deserve to be with both parents at Christmas and Thanksgiving and their birthdays. They deserve to not visit a parent while watching half-siblings get to live with that parent.Certainly some marriages end in divorce. But that is different from setting up a situation that is unstable from the outset. Obviously I support one of the bio-parents keeping the child IF they have sincerely prayed about it and that is the answer they receive, but it should be the exception.
Ahab Posted January 8, 2014 Posted January 8, 2014 (edited) Not following you on this at all. Frankly a number of things in here seem contradictory. For example you mentioned that you're talking about the social definition of family. Yet the social def recognizes adoptive children as the actual family unit. (At least in the US). And from an LDS perspective its far more than just a piece of paper, it's an eternal ordinance/relationship. Also I would not call biology the bare minimum. I would call it one possible means of definition that is used, but isn't universal...and it's not just me speaking. Love isn't the bare minimum, in my thoughts, it's the hoped-for effect. But the adoptive relationships are legitimate, legally binding, socially recognized, and spiritually sanctioned. For all intents and purposed that is their real family. And frankly that it just takes sex to make a family either makes me laugh a little or feel a little ill. No it doesn't. It really really really doesn't. For one, see what cal said (that's the ill feeling). For the other, I'm trying to imagine my mom and bio-dad as family (thus the laughing). There are 3-4 distinct family units in my immediate family bush...not 1.Kids don't have to be scarred by finding out they were adopted and you brushed over the fact that I would plan for an open adoption. The child would thus grow up knowing and learning more as time goes on. I wasn't scarred by finding out that I was the product of a one-night mistake...in fact my mother/aunts are more squirmy about those terms than I am. I'm pretty sure, if the info is presented and given in a proper fashion, it won't be a scarring understanding. Lost me on the marketplace/supply chain thing. If nobody gave up their children there would also be kids in foster care whose parents lost rights to their children in one way or another. There'd also be older, lesser known, adoptions... which happened with one of my sibs, and has nothing to do with her parents giving her up. No, it wouldn't be just orphans even then. With luv,BDWithout a father and a mother there is no child, biologically, and there also is no family. Edited January 8, 2014 by Ahab
Stone holm Posted January 14, 2014 Author Posted January 14, 2014 My two cents are, yes, I support adoption in most cases if the parents are not going to form a viable marriage. I believe children are entitled to have parents they can be sealed to. I believe they are entitled to live with both parents, and to have an actual home, to not identify their place of residence as "my mom's house" or "my dad's house," or to have to say, "home is where my suitcase is." They deserve to be with both parents at Christmas and Thanksgiving and their birthdays. They deserve to not visit a parent while watching half-siblings get to live with that parent.Certainly some marriages end in divorce. But that is different from setting up a situation that is unstable from the outset. Obviously I support one of the bio-parents keeping the child IF they have sincerely prayed about it and that is the answer they receive, but it should be the exception. My two cents is, it really depends...I would be a-okay with many people serving as a single parent ... and I don't like to see blanket policies being driven by religious ideology. Some couples shouldn't ever have kids -- but you don't see the Church out there telling them not to have kids -- if fact they tend to encourage them hey go out and multiply and replenish, when if you were really, really frank you should be telling them to go out and get sterilized. Blanket policies should not take the place of inspiration and common sense and compassion.
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