"The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives" and Loss of Membership

[CV75]

I got a preview of their spinoff:

[juliann]

15 hours ago, Calm said:

Secret Lives just started this September, one season released all at once on Hulu.  There is a Real Housewives of Salt Lake City show that has been going for 4 years, this is the last season starting tomorrow according to wiki.  Added:  Or it started the 5th…wiki apparently can’t make up its mind.
 
Older women= Real Housewives; Younger ones=Secret Lives

I wonder if that is what was on?  If not, if it was Secret Lives, that is hilarious they told you it was old episodes.  Or maybe I am just getting carried away creating a story in my mind for why they said that, lol.  Wouldn’t be the first time.  The mind is cheap entertainment and higher production values than most reality television.

 

I assume "older" meant the earliest episodes, plus all of it is "older" once it is released. They have current lives going on after filming. I know the difference between the two shows although I haven't watched a full episode of the Real Housewives. 

[LoudmouthMormon]

21 hours ago, smac97 said:

Abundant sociological research shows, unsurprisingly, that strong community boundary maintenance helps maintain strong communities: i.e., if communities want to thrive, they should set high standards and hold people to them."

And if anyone wants a good example of strong community boundary maintenance:

19 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Oh yeah, the swingers. “We are so bad and evil and sinful. Look at us! So depraved! We swap spouses and then run home and think about how naughty we are.”
Amateurs.
”We drink and use drugs”
Weaklings. If you can’t take your partner into a different and exciting headspace without dulling their mind with substances then what are you even doing with your life?
In my days of sin and vice I frequented bdsm kink clubs. It was obvious when a bunch of swingers walked in. Weirdo voyeurs. They acted shocked but they were also the most likely to get thrown out as consent violators. Both the men and the women. Somehow both bad at pushing the edge and bad at basic respect for bodily autonomy. I went to a swinger’s club a few times. Hated it. Felt like I was choking to death on all the heteronormativity. My then gf and I only found one couple we were kind of interested in but I was into him and she was into her and so that wasn’t going to work. BORING!

Zero sarcasm here.  Zero potshots to take.  I have genuine admiration for this sort of boundary maintenance.  It reminds me of folks who call out stolen valor.  It's a tame version of what happens when a rape crisis victim's group discovers a liar in their midst, playing the part to get even with an ex boyfriend.  And similar to the growing number of women and girl athletes taking issue with trans women showing up to compete and wiping the walls with the biological females.  Some people simply don't belong in other people's spaces.   Principles of diversity and inclusion are not absolutes with no exceptions.

The church doesn't publicize discipline/membership council info, but I'm hoping the church acts, and I'm hoping there are enough cameras and social media and whatnot publicizing the results.  Anyone else remember 10-20 years ago, how it was commonplace to hear folks talking about separating wheat and tares, and how the church was drawing nigh to a great sifting?  Let's normalize boundary maintenance.   

 

Edited September 18, 2024 by LoudmouthMormon

[The Nehor]

4 hours ago, LoudmouthMormon said:

And if anyone wants a good example of strong community boundary maintenance:

That was a joke. Mostly.

4 hours ago, LoudmouthMormon said:

Zero sarcasm here.  Zero potshots to take.  I have genuine admiration for this sort of boundary maintenance.  It reminds me of folks who call out stolen valor.  It's a tame version of what happens when a rape crisis victim's group discovers a liar in their midst, playing the part to get even with an ex boyfriend.  And similar to the growing number of women and girl athletes taking issue with trans women showing up to compete and wiping the walls with the biological females.  Some people simply don't belong in other people's spaces.   Principles of diversity and inclusion are not absolutes with no exceptions.

I make a comment about predatory behavior and you are comparing it to this? Stolen valor? The men’s scare tactic of talking about false rape allegations? And of course gotta punch down at the trans people as we imagine all the horrible and vile things they are doing. They aren’t in enough physical and emotional danger. Gotta turn up the heat. Who cares if they are attacked due to these scare tactics? Who cares about them and all the cis-women who are mistaken for being trans that get humiliated, attacked, and ostracized?

Gotta punch down. Can you please stop trying to foment hatred against my friends? Is that such a huge ask?

4 hours ago, LoudmouthMormon said:

The church doesn't publicize discipline/membership council info, but I'm hoping the church acts, and I'm hoping there are enough cameras and social media and whatnot publicizing the results.  Anyone else remember 10-20 years ago, how it was commonplace to hear folks talking about separating wheat and tares, and how the church was drawing nigh to a great sifting?  Let's normalize boundary maintenance.   

The tares might be the people I just mentioned punching down on the marginalized.

Also, these horrible women must be humiliated and broken and made an example of! If they don’t hurt enough how will anyone know God disapproves of them?

Oh boy.

[smac97]

4 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

That was a joke. Mostly.

I make a comment about predatory behavior and you are comparing it to this? Stolen valor? The men’s scare tactic of talking about false rape allegations? And of course gotta punch down at the trans people as we imagine all the horrible and vile things they are doing. They aren’t in enough physical and emotional danger. Gotta turn up the heat. Who cares if they are attacked due to these scare tactics? Who cares about them and all the cis-women who are mistaken for being trans that get humiliated, attacked, and ostracized?

Gotta punch down. Can you please stop trying to foment hatred against my friends? Is that such a huge ask?

The tares might be the people I just mentioned punching down on the marginalized.

Also, these horrible women must be humiliated and broken and made an example of! If they don’t hurt enough how will anyone know God disapproves of them?

Oh boy.

Pretty big derail here.  Please take it to another thread.

Thanks,

-Smac

[The Nehor]

1 hour ago, smac97 said:

Pretty big derail here.  Please take it to another thread.

Thanks,

-Smac

I will pass that along to the person who started the derail.

[Stargazer]

23 hours ago, webbles said:

I don't think Lillian Disney was LDS.  She's from Idaho but I can't find any reference to her being a member.

Perhaps not, but that was the rumor going around.

[Stargazer]

16 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Lillian being LDS is a myth.

As I suspected -- but that was the rumor.

16 hours ago, The Nehor said:

There was a Mormon night at Disneyland. There was also a Mormon night at Magic Mountain and a Mormon Night at Dodger stadium.

I moved before I was old enough to go. The one I knew of was mostly for Seminary and Institute students and required church dress which is……yuck. There was also Mormon Family Fun Party where if you were Mormon you could get $6 tickets if I remember the stories right. These events happened in the 70s and 80s and Walt Disney was dead when the events started so it wasn’t due to any soft spot he had. 

Ah, that makes sense. I've been believing a lie all these years! 😞 

16 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Walt Disney was born in 1901. He would be spinning in his grave about just about everything going on now.

 

[bluebell]

I'm not going to watch the show, but I can see why some would find it entertaining.  I don't have any issues with the women on there if they are being honest about latter-day saint beliefs and culture (and keeping the two separate).

If they are implying that LDS women can't get their haircut without their husband's permission (etc.), then that's when I would get in a dander.  But honestly, all of the facebook posts from members and member outrage on line was probably the best marketing tool ever.  So much free publicity.  I would not be surprised if it was largely the reason that the show has been either #1 or #2 on Hulu since it aired.

Sometimes we make way to much of an ado about stuff and become our own worst enemies.  

[Stargazer]

7 minutes ago, bluebell said:

I'm not going to watch the show, but I can see why some would find it entertaining.  I don't have any issues with the women on there if they are being honest about latter-day saint beliefs and culture (and keeping the two separate).

If they are implying that LDS women can't get their haircut without their husband's permission (etc.), then that's when I would get in a dander.  But honestly, all of the facebook posts from members and member outrage on line was probably the best marketing tool ever.  So much free publicity.  I would not be surprised if it was largely the reason that the show has been either #1 or #2 on Hulu since it aired.

Sometimes we make way to much of an ado about stuff and become our own worst enemies.  

Indeed. The "Streisand Effect" demonstrated once more.

[bluebell]

17 minutes ago, Stargazer said:

Indeed. The "Streisand Effect" demonstrated once more.

I had to look that up.  It seems to prove true time and time again.

[The Nehor]

I watched an episode. Found it boring. The shock stuff just seemed so petty and dull. Oh, a sex toy? Get the smelling salts before someone faints!

Was I supposed to care about the characters?

[ZealouslyStriving]

On 9/17/2024 at 11:43 AM, Duncan said:

Add Ammon Bundy to the list of how is he still a member in good standing?

I'm lost in this.... What did Bundy do that should he should have his membership withdrawn?

[The Nehor]

1 hour ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

I'm lost in this.... What did Bundy do that should he should have his membership withdrawn?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ammon_Bundy

[Duncan]

1 hour ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

I'm lost in this.... What did Bundy do that should he should have his membership withdrawn?

armed standoffs against the government, the First Presidency put out a statement saying he and others followers were misusing scripture to justify their nonsense

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ammon_Bundy

[ZealouslyStriving]

2 minutes ago, Duncan said:

armed standoffs against the government, the First Presidency put out a statement saying he and others followers were misusing scripture to justify their nonsense

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ammon_Bundy

He wasn't convicted of anything if I read that right.

[The Nehor]

9 minutes ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

He wasn't convicted of anything if I read that right.

Well, then he must be a wonderful person and the Church disavowed him unjustly.

My favorite part was when he claimed Finicum was cooperating when he was shot. Finicum was sloppily going for his gun and failing repeatedly when he was shot.

[ZealouslyStriving]

20 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

Well, then he must be a wonderful person and the Church disavowed him unjustly.

My favorite part was when he claimed Finicum was cooperating when he was shot. Finicum was sloppily going for his gun and failing repeatedly when he was shot.

Bullcrap... there is cell phone footage from the cab of the pickup showing they were trying to drive around the barricade and ariel footage showing a sniper team in the woods.

 

[Calm]

44 minutes ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

Bullcrap... there is cell phone footage from the cab of the pickup showing they were trying to drive around the barricade and ariel footage showing a sniper team in the woods.

 

How does that disprove he was going for his gun after they got stuck in the snow and he got out?  Just curious about the logic here.  I watched the videos at the time iirc and had an opinion then, but forgotten what it was. 

Edited September 21, 2024 by Calm

[Duncan]

2 hours ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

Bullcrap... there is cell phone footage from the cab of the pickup showing they were trying to drive around the barricade and ariel footage showing a sniper team in the woods.

 

that's pretty good knowledge for someone who claims is "lost in this"

nutcases like Bundy et al that give the church a bad name

and yes, he was found guilty for his anti covid garbage twice plus his March 2022 hospital protest plus his Nov. 2023 arrest warrant, which seems to be still open so yes you did read it wrong

[Duncan]

2 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Well, then he must be a wonderful person and the Church disavowed him unjustly.

My favorite part was when he claimed Finicum was cooperating when he was shot. Finicum was sloppily going for his gun and failing repeatedly when he was shot.

or when one of his meatheads asked for people to send more snacks😁

[The Nehor]

2 hours ago, ZealouslyStriving said:

Bullcrap... there is cell phone footage from the cab of the pickup showing they were trying to drive around the barricade and ariel footage showing a sniper team in the woods.

 

They had a sniper team. They had Finicum surrounded since he was part of an illegal occupation of federal lands that was destroying a lot of property. When ordered to give up he kept reaching for his weapon and missing and then got shot. I watched the footage. It is one of those rare law enforcement cases where the shooting was justified. He had a weapon. They knew he had a weapon. They saw the weapon. He repeatedly reached for the weapon.

[Tacenda]

On 9/17/2024 at 3:30 PM, smac97 said:

We've seen people try to gin up a bit of Sturm und Drang regarding a membership council.  Kate Kelly.  John Dehlin.  Jeremy Runnells.  Denver Snuffer.  Natasha Helfer.  It doesn't seem to work out very well.  Membership councils are quiet affairs on public property, and don't lend themselves to sensationalism.

Thanks,

-Smac

A podcaster named "Nemo" recently was ex'd or going to be. I wonder why RFM hasn't been? Could it stir up trouble or be better if he isn't? Too much publicity? It's interesting how some are and some aren't.

Edited September 22, 2024 by Tacenda

[Calm]

10 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Could it stir up trouble or be better if he isn't? Too much publicity?

I doubt it. There have been others that likely got much more attention than RFM would, such as John Dehlin and Kate Kelly. 

I don’t know about others, for me the novelty has worn off.

Local leaders have different set points. If you listen to one of John Dehlin’s recordings of his stake president (the recording he promised he wouldn’t make…I don’t see how anyone trusts what this guy says), you can tell the SP was working hard to make it work for Dehlin’s family.  I was of the personal opinion Dehlin should have been exed long before he was, but got to admire the SP for still struggling to resolve the conflict.  I think there are Saps who would have exed Dehlin at least 5 years before.

I wouldn’t be surprised if there are a lot of leaders who will never give up on someone.

Edited September 22, 2024 by Calm

[smac97]

1 hour ago, Tacenda said:

A podcaster named "Nemo" recently was ex'd or going to be.

Yes, I saw his announcement.  

1 hour ago, Tacenda said:

I wonder why RFM hasn't been? Could it stir up trouble or be better if he isn't? Too much publicity? It's interesting how some are and some aren't.

"RFM" = Richard Packham?  I think he died a little while ago.  And he apparently left the Church in 1958.

Thanks,

-Smac