Marriage Isn't The Problem - Straight Or Gay....

[sdc999]

I'm not  a fan of gay marriage.  I have friends that are gay that I would do anything for.  I do not personally believe in it though.  What I find unfathomable though, is all the hypocrites standing on their soap boxes condemning the gay marriage deal.  And by hypocrites I mean all of the divorced so called christians. Many sit beside you in church every Sunday.  In the mormon faith, the methodist faith, baptist, catholics......... EVERY faith.    The bible is pretty clear on the divorce topic.    "it just didn't work out" doesn't cut it in the eyes of the Lord.  

 

The crises we face today is the failing family unit.  Again, in ALL religions.   Of course i'm not naive. Your friend in the divorce was was the one who did everything right.  ha  I've seen over 10 facebook posts today from divorced/remarried individuals who were testifying of the sanctimony of man/woman marriage.    Several I'm pretty familiar with.  Yes, they are adulterers according to scripture.  But whoa to those who sin differently than they do.  3 of which are sealed in the temple.  I guess the adultery thing slipped by in the bishop's interview.    This in not to bash LDS but it slips by every pastor of every religion.  

 

Accountability is out the window when it comes to relationships today.  I have a two siblings, brother - married 4 times, sister- twice.  SIL - three marriages (lds), 2nd SIL- three marriages (lds).  

 

I made a commitment to my spouse in the beginning that I was willing to work hard as I believed in getting married once and staying married.  Over 20 years.  It's work, but we were willing. 

 

Divorce is no longer a stigma.  It's almost a badge of honor these days.    

 

Divorce when kids are involved is even worse.  

 

Choose your spouse wisely and work hard.   

[Avatar4321]

I tend to agree. It's a symptom not the source of th problem.

Strengthening our relationships with Christ would fix alot of those problems.

[carbon dioxide]

Marriage is pretty much a joke today.   From easy divorce to pre-nup agreements.  If I was not raised LDS, I would not bother getting married and probably would agree with SSM since heterosexual marriage is pretty much means nothing in the secular world for the most part.  Though I believe SSM is a mockery of what divine marriage is, the real damage has been down by all the straight people in how they have treated it over the last century.

[PeterPear]

If one has to used a failed marriage (divorce) to jusify SSM, then it's a shallow and ridiculous arguement.

"If ye love me, keep my commandments." SSM is contrary to His commands.

[Duncan]

I'm not  a fan of gay marriage.  I have friends that are gay that I would do anything for.  I do not personally believe in it though.  What I find unfathomable though, is all the hypocrites standing on their soap boxes condemning the gay marriage deal.  And by hypocrites I mean all of the divorced so called christians. Many sit beside you in church every Sunday.  In the mormon faith, the methodist faith, baptist, catholics......... EVERY faith.    The bible is pretty clear on the divorce topic.    "it just didn't work out" doesn't cut it in the eyes of the Lord.  

 

The crises we face today is the failing family unit.  Again, in ALL religions.   Of course i'm not naive. Your friend in the divorce was was the one who did everything right.  ha  I've seen over 10 facebook posts today from divorced/remarried individuals who were testifying of the sanctimony of man/woman marriage.    Several I'm pretty familiar with.  Yes, they are adulterers according to scripture.  But whoa to those who sin differently than they do.  3 of which are sealed in the temple.  I guess the adultery thing slipped by in the bishop's interview.    This in not to bash LDS but it slips by every pastor of every religion.  

 

Accountability is out the window when it comes to relationships today.  I have a two siblings, brother - married 4 times, sister- twice.  SIL - three marriages (lds), 2nd SIL- three marriages (lds).  

 

I made a commitment to my spouse in the beginning that I was willing to work hard as I believed in getting married once and staying married.  Over 20 years.  It's work, but we were willing. 

 

Divorce is no longer a stigma.  It's almost a badge of honor these days.    

 

Divorce when kids are involved is even worse.  

 

Choose your spouse wisely and work hard.   

 

 

Like someone said in a previous post even God kicked Satan out, it's sad but sometimes divorce needs to happen. Not every divorce is the result of adultery. Not every marriage is a great one. Like President Hugh B. Brown said "Marriage is like a mushroom, you don't know it's good until it's too late" Some things don't work out, if one heart is in a relationship it isn't going to last unless it's fixed

[JulieM]

I remember reading that the first several Prophets were divorced. Most were polygamous divorces but IIRC, one was divorced from their first legal wife. I can't remember which Prophet, but I'll try to look it up and return to post what I find (and if I am remembering correctly here).

So even past Prophets of our church have gone through divorces and failed marriages.

Edited June 28, 2015 by JulieM

[JulieM]

Yes, it was Joseph F. Smith who was divorced from his first, legal wife (Livira Annette Clark Smith). They were married in 1859 and she divorced him in 1868.

All other Prophets before him (other that Joseph Smith if I'm not mistaken) also were divorced but they were from polygamous marriages.

[JAHS]

"And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." (Matt 19: 5-6)

 

We assume by this that any marriage between a man and woman is sanctioned by God and therefore could only be broken up by God.

 

When a couple is sealed in the temple and then later get a cancelation of the sealing, which requires First Presidency approval, can we assume that the First Presidency received revelation from God to OK the cancelation of the sealing? In effect God has put it usunder, not man (except of course for whatever the couple did that initiated the break up)

[Traela]

Keep in mind, some of those divorced people may not have had a choice. At least in some states, the "no-fault" divorce laws are written in such a way that, once one person decides to start proceedings, the other person can't do anything to stop it.

[Duncan]

Let's not forget some couples married in the Temple may be broken up in the next life, especially terrible marriages here but married in the Temple. I can't imagine God allowing those to continue a day longer. He'll rearrange things couples there. I am sure we all know LDS couples like that

[california boy]

Let's get back to the evils of SSM. Discussing the evils of divorce is way too scary. All gay marriages are sinful and devalue the institution of marriage. But when you start calling divorce sinful and distrutive we gotta draw the line. And figure out a way to get Gods approval.

Wait. I think I found a way. Whatt if we say that divorce comes from revelation from God and Satan is behind gay marriage. Yeah. That should work.

[carbon dioxide]

Let's get back to the evils of SSM. Discussing the evils of divorce is way too scary. All gay marriages are sinful and devalue the institution of marriage. But when you start calling divorce sinful and distrutive we gotta draw the line. And figure out a way to get Gods approval.

Wait. I think I found a way. Whatt if we say that divorce comes from revelation from God and Satan is behind gay marriage. Yeah. That should work.

Sometimes divorce is from God.  Surely God would not want a marriage to continue if serious abuse was occurring and it was not going to stop. 

[canard78]

Let's get back to the evils of SSM. Discussing the evils of divorce is way too scary. All gay marriages are sinful and devalue the institution of marriage. But when you start calling divorce sinful and distrutive we gotta draw the line. And figure out a way to get Gods approval.

Wait. I think I found a way. Whatt if we say that divorce comes from revelation from God and Satan is behind gay marriage. Yeah. That should work.

Problem is, many heterosexual people want to own marriage as a word and institution. "It's ours" they say. They want to decide when it starts, among whom and even when it ends.

Thankfully those people are in a rapidly diminishing minority. I was pleasantly surprised yesterday at the fully of rainbow coloured profile pics on Facebook to celebrate Pride. LDS who I'd previously assumed to be more orthodox were getting in on it. Good for them.

[canard78]

Sometimes divorce is from God. Surely God would not want a marriage to continue if serious abuse was occurring and it was not going to stop.

I agree. On the same token, the divine influence I believe in would be just as supportive of a same-sex couple wanting to formalise a relationship through marriage where supportive, love and nurturing was occurring.

[california boy]

Sometimes divorce is from God. Surely God would not want a marriage to continue if serious abuse was occurring and it was not going to stop.

Well let's talk a little more truthfully here

I agree no one should be in an abusive relationship. The abuser should be thrown in jail and the key tossed away. BUT the vast number of divorces are not about abusive marriages. And this is where the blatant hypocracy and prejudice is against gay marriage

That does not stop many people from saying SSM is the work of Satan and will harm the institute of marriage while divorce is rampant Have you ever heard just one of these "Christians" say that Chiist is packing his bags and the second coming is near because of rampant divorce? No. Instead as you can see from the comments these same "Christians" condemn gay marriage and justify divorce

[CV75]

I'm not  a fan of gay marriage.  I have friends that are gay that I would do anything for.  I do not personally believe in it though.  What I find unfathomable though, is all the hypocrites standing on their soap boxes condemning the gay marriage deal.  And by hypocrites I mean all of the divorced so called christians. Many sit beside you in church every Sunday.  In the mormon faith, the methodist faith, baptist, catholics......... EVERY faith.    The bible is pretty clear on the divorce topic.    "it just didn't work out" doesn't cut it in the eyes of the Lord.  

 

The crises...

Two wrongs don't make a right. The crisis? Ultimately, pride!

[Kenngo1969]

... Choose your spouse wisely and work hard.   

Great advice.  While I'm not suggesting someone should stay in, e.g., an abusive marriage, marriage is one of those things that should be done once and done right, or not done at all.  Nothing's better than a good marriage, and nothing's worse than a bad one ... (Or at least, so I hear.)

 

Edited June 28, 2015 by Kenngo1969

[danielwoods]

Well let's talk a little more truthfully here

I agree no one should be in an abusive relationship. The abuser should be thrown in jail and the key tossed away. BUT the vast number of divorces are not about abusive marriages. And this is where the blatant hypocracy and prejudice is against gay marriage

That does not stop many people from saying SSM is the work of Satan and will harm the institute of marriage while divorce is rampant Have you ever heard just one of these "Christians" say that Chiist is packing his bags and the second coming is near because of rampant divorce? No. Instead as you can see from the comments these same "Christians" condemn gay marriage and justify divorce

 

With reference to same sex activities, tell me, why (in your opinion) does God say don't do it? 

[ALarson]

 Your friend in the divorce was was the one who did everything right.  ha  I've seen over 10 facebook posts today from divorced/remarried individuals who were testifying of the sanctimony of man/woman marriage.    Several I'm pretty familiar with.  Yes, they are adulterers according to scripture. 

As mentioned above, Joseph F. Smith was divorced from his wife.  Do you believe that he was an adulterer?

 

There are exceptions (and yes, sometimes adultery is involved), but it's not up to you to judge.  To get a temple cancellation (some call it a "temple divorce"), the leaders of the church approve of this action.  They are more in a position to judge.

 

I do agree with your statement: "Choose your spouse wisely and work hard."  

[Ahab]

I'm not a fan of gay marriage. I have friends that are gay that I would do anything for. I do not personally believe in it though. What I find unfathomable though, is all the hypocrites standing on their soap boxes condemning the gay marriage deal. And by hypocrites I mean all of the divorced so called christians. Many sit beside you in church every Sunday. In the mormon faith, the methodist faith, baptist, catholics......... EVERY faith. The bible is pretty clear on the divorce topic. "it just didn't work out" doesn't cut it in the eyes of the Lord.

The crises we face today is the failing family unit. Again, in ALL religions. Of course i'm not naive. Your friend in the divorce was was the one who did everything right. ha I've seen over 10 facebook posts today from divorced/remarried individuals who were testifying of the sanctimony of man/woman marriage. Several I'm pretty familiar with. Yes, they are adulterers according to scripture. But whoa to those who sin differently than they do. 3 of which are sealed in the temple. I guess the adultery thing slipped by in the bishop's interview. This in not to bash LDS but it slips by every pastor of every religion.

Accountability is out the window when it comes to relationships today. I have a two siblings, brother - married 4 times, sister- twice. SIL - three marriages (lds), 2nd SIL- three marriages (lds).

I made a commitment to my spouse in the beginning that I was willing to work hard as I believed in getting married once and staying married. Over 20 years. It's work, but we were willing.

Divorce is no longer a stigma. It's almost a badge of honor these days.

Divorce when kids are involved is even worse.

Choose your spouse wisely and work hard.

What would you do if your wife someday "felt" that she wasn't happy being your wife and that there was no way to change that because YOU are the problem because of the way that you are. Unless maybe YOU changed, which she had been hoping for a very long time, but that now she sees that YOU are never going to change in that way. So now she "feels" like it's just better for both of you to move on so she can find someone else who is the kind of person that she really wants to be married to forever.

Basically, she decides that she just can't be happy with you as long as you are the way you are, but which is the way that you want to be.

That's the thing about marriage. Both have to want to stay in it and if one person decides to give up on the other person then that other person is left as the one that was given up on. And sometimes for good reasons, like adultery or abuse.

Fortunately my one and only spouse has never given up on me, and I don't intend to give her a good reason, and I hope you never give your spouse a good reason either.

2 people of the same sex never have a good reason to marry each other, of course, even if they truly love each other. Everybody should love everybody, but men should marry women and women should marry men.

Edited June 28, 2015 by Ahab

[JAHS]

In my opinion the number one reason for divorce is selfishness, however it might be made manifest. Some believe that marriage should be a 50/50 situation and if one doesn't get his or her 50% from their spouse they want to end it.  Both should give 100% to the relationship and not expect anything from the other. Unconditional love.  Of course for this to work both must have this same mindset.  It also helps to have God as a member of the partnership.

[Ahab]

In my opinion the number one reason for divorce is selfishness, however it might be made manifest. Some believe that marriage should be a 50/50 situation and if one doesn't get his or her 50% from their spouse they want to end it. Both should give 100% to the relationship and not expect anything from the other. Unconditional love. Of course for this to work both must have this same mindset. It also helps to have God as a member of the partnership.

Yes there should be unconditional love, but there should be the condition of certain expected behaviours. No adultery or abuse, for example. People who divorce can still love each other, at least a little bit. But of course it is better for a man and a woman who are married to stay married while treating each other as they should be treated.

I hate even having to mention SSM.

[ALarson]

I hate even having to mention SSM.

And yet you continue to do so to the point of almost seeming obsessed with this topic.   

[JAHS]

Yes there should be unconditional love, but there should be the condition of certain expected behaviours. No adultery or abuse, for example. People who divorce can still love each other, at least a little bit. But of course it is better for a man and a woman who are married to stay married while treating each other as they should be treated.

I hate even having to mention SSM.

"but there should be the condition of certain expected behaviours. No adultery or abuse, for example." 

 

But if there is unconditional love and no selfishness there is no need to set conditions of expected behavior. Adultery and abuse would not be an issue to even worry about.  I know, easier said than done for us fallible mortals.  

[Ahab]

And yet you continue to do so to the point of almost seeming obsessed with this topic.

I like to talk about marriage and how a marriage of people should be.

I hate the idea of people of the same sex "marrying" each other.