Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 12 minutes ago, Rain said: True question. Did you mean to make your last line an ironic joke referring to the happy life mantra and how it is taken? The mantra is "taken" in many different ways by many different people, so I don't know how to answer that question. My main point was that men need women and women need men to have true ultimate joy, and it is worth it to at least this man, me, to make sacrifices for it.
stemelbow Posted April 14, 2017 Author Posted April 14, 2017 3 minutes ago, Ahab said: Did that. She got sad. She thinks the fact that I love her more than anyone else and that I want to spend more time with her than anyone else should equate to me wanting to me wanting to spend as much time as I possibly can with her with as few diversions as possible. And she saw my game time as my "me" time rather than something "we" need to be doing. And so I stopped to cut out that "me" time to replace it with more time together for "us". And now she is happy and "we" are happy. You're going to have to fill me in what you mean by "". I think it's sweet you cut out gaming to spend more time with your wife.
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 17 minutes ago, Tacenda said: I think that expression stinks. I don't think all women are like that, it's almost like giving them an excuse to get what they want. If I were you I'd have a heart to heart talk, and express how you really feel about it. You mean the husband is allowed to have feelings too?
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 (edited) 9 minutes ago, Ahab said: Did that. She got sad. She thinks the fact that I love her more than anyone else and that I want to spend more time with her than anyone else should equate to me wanting to me wanting to spend as much time as I possibly can with her with as few diversions as possible. And she saw my game time as my "me" time rather than something "we" need to be doing. And so I stopped to cut out that "me" time to replace it with more time together for "us". And now she is happy and "we" are happy. Sorry dude, but that is classic manipulation. Not cool. Everyone is entitled to "me time". Edited April 14, 2017 by JLHPROF 3
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 3 minutes ago, stemelbow said: You're going to have to fill me in what you mean by "". I think it's sweet you cut out gaming to spend more time with your wife. Just a thing I do to try to add some more emphasis to a word to try to get people to wonder why I do it. And yes it is and I do other sweet things too.
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 (edited) 6 minutes ago, JLHPROF said: Sorry dude, but that is classic manipulation. Not cool. Everyone is entitled to "me time". Happy Wife = Happy Life, though. It works! Now she is happy, not sad, and "we" are happy, too. And all it took was a little bit of sacrifice for "me". Edited April 14, 2017 by Ahab
Jeanne Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 (edited) 16 minutes ago, Ahab said: The mantra is "taken" in many different ways by many different people, so I don't know how to answer that question. My main point was that men need women and women need men to have true ultimate joy, and it is worth it to at least this man, me, to make sacrifices for it. Not communicating with her about how you feel..and developing a compromise, deprives her of the joy of doing something for you Edited April 14, 2017 by Jeanne 4
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 Just now, Jeanne said: Not communicating with her about you feel..and developing a compromise, deprives her of the joy of doing something for you I told her how I feel. I communicated with her, and she with me. And yes she does things for me too. 1
Tacenda Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 25 minutes ago, Ahab said: Did that. She got sad. She thinks the fact that I love her more than anyone else and that I want to spend more time with her than anyone else should equate to me wanting to me wanting to spend as much time as I possibly can with her with as few diversions as possible. And she saw my game time as my "me" time rather than something "we" need to be doing. And so I stopped to cut out that "me" time to replace it with more time together for "us". And now she is happy and "we" are happy. Doesn't sound like you are though. As far as not getting to have some time for "you"! Does she have "me" time? Then you should too! Sorry to be such a nosy nose here. I just think she may have it backwards. 3
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 15 minutes ago, Ahab said: Happy Wife = Happy Life, though. It works! Now she is happy, not sad, and "we" are happy, too. And all it took was a little bit of sacrifice for "me". If you truly are happy that's great. My wife wants me to be happy. I want her to be happy. We are both willing to sacrifice. I only question when the sacrifice becomes one-sided, or when manipulative techniques are used to achieve it. "If you really loved me you would xyz..." I totally agree with "happy wife = happy life". But if a wife is happy because her husband is not, that's a problem. 3
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 3 minutes ago, Tacenda said: Doesn't sound like you are though. As far as not getting to have some time for "you"! Does she have "me" time? Then you should too! Sorry to be such a nosy nose here. I just think she may have it backwards. I am happy. I am the one saying "Happy Wife = Happy Life" while testifying that it really works. The naysayers on this are the ones who seem to have it backwards to me.
Tacenda Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 (edited) 5 minutes ago, Ahab said: I am happy. I am the one saying "Happy Wife = Happy Life" while testifying that it really works. The naysayers on this are the ones who seem to have it backwards to me. I'm sorry, I thought she put forth the mantra, "Happy Wife=Happy Life", not you. If you're happy, then fine Ahab!! ETA: Wait, I'm wrong, it's usually the guy that says that...Happy Wife thing. Edited April 14, 2017 by Tacenda 1
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 1 minute ago, JLHPROF said: If you truly are happy that's great. My wife wants me to be happy. I want her to be happy. We are both willing to sacrifice. I only question when the sacrifice becomes one-sided, or when manipulative techniques are used to achieve it. "If you really loved me you would xyz..." I totally agree with "happy wife = happy life". But if a wife is happy because her husband is not, that's a problem. The key I think is in the sacrifice of "me" time, from both sides, to make the "me" time "we" time. And her ultimate joy seems to be to make as much "we" time as possible, with neither one of us doing anything for just "me". She is perfect for me, helping me to be as I should be, and as someone who was a bachelor until I was 40, almost 41, sometimes the transition from "me" to "we" isn't easy. 1
Rain Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 1 hour ago, Ahab said: The mantra is "taken" in many different ways by many different people, so I don't know how to answer that question. My main point was that men need women and women need men to have true ultimate joy, and it is worth it to at least this man, me, to make sacrifices for it. I'm talking about how it is described here. Quote It’s said man to man, with a wink, a slight smile, and often with a touch of sarcasm. You hear it at the coffee shop while waiting in line, at the office, at lunch with a buddy, during “kitchen talk” at a party, or in the man-cave where “What’s said there, stays there”… However intended, it is believed by many husbands to be true. A happy wife means a happy life, wink-wink. This seemingly innocent belief has far reaching implications for husbands and their wives. Let me share what I’ve experienced as a past believer in this myth, how it can erode a relationship over time, and provide alternatives. A Happy Wife It’s noble for a husband to aspire too. Of course he wants his wife to be happy. He decides to do his best to make sure she is. He does the things he knows please her, and avoids doing things that upset her. He puts her needs first to show that he is a loving and caring husband. A Happy Life A happy life is the anticipated outcome for husbands who have a happy wife. Rewards come a man’s way for accomplishing things on the to-do list and making a woman’s wants the priority: going out with the boys more often, watching a game without interruption, getting more sex, or buying a new TV or whatever item a man has had his eye on. It’s a barter system. The concept has been used for centuries. I give you what you want so I can get what I want. Or like with the man who seems to have coined the phrase: Jeff Allen Any of the things I have read about the studies in this area do NOT fit this idea. So did you mean this: Quote I say it based on my experience that it is true, thinking of all the selfless things I have done and still do to please my wife instead of focusing only on what I wanted and want to do. Computer/phone games, for example. She didn't like me playing them while I did. And she let me know that she wasn't happy while I just tried to cut down to when I couldn't be with her, like on my way to work. But she still wasn't happy because I sometimes still thought about the games and rarely talked about them with her because the games were just for play to me and not something to talk about. So I have now given them up and now she is happy. Women. Can't have joy without them but they sure as heck want us to sacrifice for them. as a ironic joke considering how the mantra was originally intended and how your description seems to illustrate it or do you really believe it? 1
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 (edited) Rain, I don't know how to explain my thoughts on this other than by saying what I have already said in this thread. I mean it. It works. That's my testimony. And I am well pleased that I can contribute to the happiness of me and my wife. Edited April 14, 2017 by Ahab
blueglass Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 On 4/13/2017 at 11:07 AM, MiserereNobis said: Catholics have the Blessed Virgin Mary, the Mother of God, so maybe you wouldn't be as from traditional Christianity as you might think. Mary's role in Catholicism really cannot be understated; she is second only to Christ. It could be that when evangelicals accuse catholics of reviving paganism through the marian doctrine and worship, that they are wrong, and veneration for Mary is more of an underlying desire or appropriate model for worshiping Heavenly Mother. It's definitely true that worship of female deities has gone back and forth from being ok, to being condemned in the bible. Asherah figurines I believe have even been discovered near the temple site, as well as inscriptions "bless YHWH and his asherah". while on my mission when asked as a missionary about veneration for mary we would read from 1nephi11 about the virgin, and then ask if they worshiped the mother of the virgin mary - Anna. If mary was blessed as to become the mother of the son of God, imagine the honor and blessing of being called to be the mother of the mother of the son of God!
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 24 minutes ago, blueglass said: It could be that when evangelicals accuse catholics of reviving paganism through the marian doctrine and worship, that they are wrong, and veneration for Mary is more of an underlying desire or appropriate model for worshiping Heavenly Mother. It's definitely true that worship of female deities has gone back and forth from being ok, to being condemned in the bible. Asherah figurines I believe have even been discovered near the temple site, as well as inscriptions "bless YHWH and his asherah". while on my mission when asked as a missionary about veneration for mary we would read from 1nephi11 about the virgin, and then ask if they worshiped the mother of the virgin mary - Anna. If mary was blessed as to become the mother of the son of God, imagine the honor and blessing of being called to be the mother of the mother of the son of God! Early Mormon members in Utah would have taught that Mary was the Mother of the Son of God AND therefore the wife of God. That would make her one of our Heavenly Mothers today even though she was not a mother of our spirits.
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 27 minutes ago, JLHPROF said: Early Mormon members in Utah would have taught that Mary was the Mother of the Son of God AND therefore the wife of God. These days we know about how women can be implanted with the seed of a man and how that doesn't mean the man and woman have been married, though. 27 minutes ago, JLHPROF said: That would make her one of our Heavenly Mothers today even though she was not a mother of our spirits. She wasn't in heaven then when she was made a Mother, though. And we have had many Mothers here who were not the Mother of our spirits.
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 21 minutes ago, Ahab said: These days we know about how women can be implanted with the seed of a man and how that doesn't mean the man and woman have been married, though. Sorry, I reject the Celestial turkey baster theory in favor of the teachings of the prophet Brigham Young.
HappyJackWagon Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 4 minutes ago, JLHPROF said: Sorry, I reject the Celestial turkey baster theory in favor of the teachings of the prophet Brigham Young. You're both assuming that spirit children are created through what we consider normal, sxual reproductive processes with seed/egg creation. Some have taught that, but I struggle to reconcile that with the concept of "organizing" intelligences into spirits.
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 5 minutes ago, HappyJackWagon said: You're both assuming that spirit children are created through what we consider normal, sxual reproductive processes with seed/egg creation. Some have taught that, but I struggle to reconcile that with the concept of "organizing" intelligences into spirits. Actually, we are talking of the conception of Christ in the flesh. The Only Begotten Son in the flesh. The pregnancy of Mary with her DNA and Heavenly Father's DNA.
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 12 minutes ago, JLHPROF said: Sorry, I reject the Celestial turkey baster theory in favor of the teachings of the prophet Brigham Young. Even the "old-fashioned" way doesn't require marriage.
Ahab Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 1 minute ago, JLHPROF said: Actually, we are talking of the conception of Christ in the flesh. The Only Begotten Son in the flesh. The pregnancy of Mary with her DNA and Heavenly Father's DNA. Not necessary Mary's DNA. We now know of (at least) 3 options: 1. In vitro fertilization of one of Mary's eggs 2. Mary being a surrogate Mother for our Father and Mother, with a fertilized egg from our Mother implanted in Mary 3. Our Father and Mary having sexual intercourse the old-fashioned, regular, way I listed them in the order I think is most likely.
JLHPROF Posted April 14, 2017 Posted April 14, 2017 16 minutes ago, Ahab said: Even the "old-fashioned" way doesn't require marriage. It does if the law of Chastity is considered to be eternal along with marriage.
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