How do you manage the rules?

[Rain]

 

On 11/6/2024 at 1:27 AM, Dario_M said:

I know. It basically means that you have a debt by somebody and you still need to pay for that debt. Because that person have given you the option to pay afterwards instead of paying it right away.  

No, it's not so much an obligation to pay back or forward, but being grateful that your burden was lifted and wanting to do that for someone else.

[JVW]

14 minutes ago, SeekingUnderstanding said:

Some people were less valiant in the pre-existence and hence have fewer board privileges. Limited status can't start threads, can't give feedback. Likely someday to be my fate.

Oh shoot, he was a fence sitter? I never thought I'd meet one!

[Dario_M]

10 minutes ago, Rain said:

 

No, it's not so much an obligation to pay back or forward, but being grateful that your burden was lifted and wanting to do that for someone else.

Well.. i find that it is how i desribed it. But thank you for your insight anyway. So kind. 🫂

[Tacenda]

2 hours ago, Dario_M said:

Aaawh. That's so said for you brother. And now he is in Prison. That's fussed up. I also had a period that i wanted to drive myself into a tree. But i never did it. At that time i was not that depressed like i am now. But anyway..this must be hard for your brother. Being in jail is not fun. I've been in a psychiatric ward. And they didn't allowed me to go outside. Was in Portugal. That psychiatric ward was a straigt up prison. After a month spending my time on there i was losing my insanity of being trapped in there. 

I can fully understand you. I actually find that alcohol should be forbidden completely to be honest. It has damaged so many people who got seriously addicted to it. And you know...alcohol is so bad for the liver. And having liver problems is very very horible. I hope for your brother that he will get better times in the future. 🫂

Thanks, and so happy for you to be in a better place in life right now. And being able to go to nature for prayer and mediation like recently. ❤️

[Dario_M]

4 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Thanks, and so happy for you to be in a better place in life right now. And being able to go to nature for prayer and mediation like recently. ❤️

Yes that is wonderfull isn't it? I just LOVE to pray in the woods. It just makes me feel closer to God you know. 🩵

[Calm]

3 hours ago, Dario_M said:

Well.. i find that it is how i desribed it. But thank you for your insight anyway. So kind. 🫂

Different people interpret it different ways.

[Dario_M]

15 minutes ago, Calm said:

Different people interpret it different ways.

That's true and that is why i really appreciate Rains interpretation of the sentence "paying it foward" you know. 🩵 what do you think about my interpretation actually, if i may be so free to ask? 

[Robert F. Smith]

On 11/6/2024 at 10:42 AM, The Nehor said:

What are you saying Dario is addicted to?

I'm not.  He mentioned that "i struggle kind a bit with all the commandments. I drink alcohol on special affairs. I have sex. And i swear a lot."

[Calm]

8 minutes ago, Dario_M said:

That's true and that is why i really appreciate Rains interpretation of the sentence "paying it foward" you know. 🩵 what do you think about my interpretation actually, if i may be so free to ask? 

I think it’s closer to the original idea, but in the US and Canada (at least in the areas I get exposed to), I believe this more typically used to mean what Rain says.

[Dario_M]

7 minutes ago, Calm said:

I think it’s closer to the original idea, but in the US and Canada (at least in the areas I get exposed to), I believe this more typically used to mean what Rain says.

Okay okay..i see. 

[Vanguard]

On 11/5/2024 at 7:53 AM, Dario_M said:

I will admit that i struggle kind a bit with all the commandments. I drink alcohol on special affairs. I have sex. And i swear a lot. Not with the name of Our Lord Jesus Christ or God. But other swear words. I'm only human. 🤷‍♀️

But what about you? How do you manage all the rules of the LDS community? Do you find it hard? Or do you manage it quite well. Are you consistent in wearing your garment every day. Or do you not always wanna wear that thing? Let me know. Oh if somebody want to throw some scriptures in this topic that would be magnificent as well. Since i moved back to the Netherlands i have lost my Book of Mormon. So unfortunately i can't read any of that good stuf anymore. Unless i look it up on the internet. 

Swearing? I'm pretty good with not swearing. When I moved up to Utah from Cali ~6 years ago I was shocked at how much folks cursed/swore in the workplace and at mental health clinics no less! It made me wonder if it was some type of conscious/subconscious resistance to the Church. Folks didn't swear nearly as much in Cali (in many locations up and down the state). Had they done so, they would have been pulled into a pre-disciplinary procedure. It's all very weird.

Alcohol? I've tased alcohol on 4 different occasions in my life (I'm 58). I look at drinking as an acquired taste. In other words, we're not born with the desire but rather artificially make it so. 

Are you consistent in wearing your garment every day? For the most part, yes. It is generally not hard since it is what I have worn for ~40 yrs. It would feel awkward wearing briefs or boxer shorts to bed. I do sometimes get lax when I play pickleball or mow the lawn where I can at times go all day not remembering I do not have my garments on.

[Calm]

1 hour ago, Dario_M said:

Okay okay..i see. 

I think the meaning has broaden here because people see it as unrealistic to hold someone to a debt just on their word.  The idea is very few would pay off a debt if they weren’t required by law to do so, especially if no one would know that they didn’t.

If they feel forced, as “obligated” is often interpreted here imo, there would be an expectation of resistance…no one supposedly likes being told what do do, we Americans are so independent and all (I think that is a myth and many of us indeed prefer to be told what to do).  So it shifted to more being grateful to the one helping you pay your debt and expressing that gratitude by helping others. It made you feel better and you want others to feel better to.

Edited November 7, 2024 by Calm

[Tacenda]

9 hours ago, SeekingUnderstanding said:

Some people were less valiant in the pre-existence and hence have fewer board privileges. Limited status can't start threads, can't give feedback. Likely someday to be my fate.

I knew it well, those days.

[Dario_M]

6 hours ago, Vanguard said:

Swearing? I'm pretty good with not swearing. When I moved up to Utah from Cali ~6 years ago I was shocked at how much folks cursed/swore in the workplace and at mental health clinics no less! It made me wonder if it was some type of conscious/subconscious resistance to the Church. Folks didn't swear nearly as much in Cali (in many locations up and down the state). Had they done so, they would have been pulled into a pre-disciplinary procedure. It's all very weird.

So.. you're basicaly saying that more people in Utah swear then people in California? I mean...how?  Especially Los Angeles...i feel like a lot of people swear in Los Angeles. Look at all those Hollywood movies and video clips let alone. 

6 hours ago, Vanguard said:

Alcohol? I've tased alcohol on 4 different occasions in my life (I'm 58). I look at drinking as an acquired taste. In other words, we're not born with the desire but rather artificially make it so. 

The feeling of getting drunk can also just be pleasent. That's why so many people are addictive to alcohol. 

I don't drink munch. But on special occasions i find it hard to say no. Is it hypocrite of me to drink because i'm from the LDS community? Yes sure. But i've never been a exemplary saint. It's just hard. To have that dedication.

6 hours ago, Vanguard said:

Are you consistent in wearing your garment every day? For the most part, yes. It is generally not hard since it is what I have worn for ~40 yrs.

How did it felt in the beginning? Can you remember that? 

6 hours ago, Vanguard said:

It would feel awkward wearing briefs or boxer shorts to bed. I do sometimes get lax when I play pickleball or mow the lawn where I can at times go all day not remembering I do not have my garments on.

But is it not just a turture to wear that thing in de summer months? Must be kinda hot. Only the idea of it makes me sweat allready actually.🥵 And with that garment on you can't wear shorts or anything. If a garment was more practical, not so hot in the summer, and i could wear shorts under it, i would get my melchizedek priesthood. And later on i would get the endowment ritual. And after that i would wear a garment. But because the idea of wearing that thing suffocates me i rather pass. 

[Dario_M]

2 hours ago, Tacenda said:

I knew it well, those days.

But why did you had that status? Or...where you misbehaving a bit haha. 😅 i can remember that 2 years ago i couldn't upvote you. 

Edited November 8, 2024 by Dario_M

[Dario_M]

6 hours ago, Calm said:

I think the meaning has broaden here because people see it as unrealistic to hold someone to a debt just on their word.  The idea is very few would pay off a debt if they weren’t required by law to do so, especially if no one would know that they didn’t.

That's true. But then the sentence "paying it forward" has not the correct meaning behind it if nobody have to pay it afterwards. You guys should call it "paying it never" 

6 hours ago, Calm said:

If they feel forced, as “obligated” is often interpreted here imo, there would be an expectation of resistance…no one supposedly likes being told what do do,

I know. That's really a thing in the American culture. Here in the Netherlands people like to tell you what to do though. And it's quite comming that you listen to them if they are right. It can be a bit annoying at times. 

6 hours ago, Calm said:

we Americans are so independent and all (I think that is a myth and many of us indeed prefer to be told what to do).

I feel like you guys really hate unwanted advice to be honest. That's the picture i get. 

6 hours ago, Calm said:

 So it shifted to more being grateful to the one helping you pay your debt and expressing that gratitude by helping others. It made you feel better and you want others to feel better to.

Well.. that's a beautiful thought. It's always good to help others just because you really wanna help them. Without expecting something in return. 

[Calm]

1 hour ago, Dario_M said:

But then the sentence "paying it forward" has not the correct meaning behind it if nobody have to pay it afterwards. You guys should call it "paying it never" 

There are lots of idioms that don’t make sense because they have lost the connection to the original meaning, such as “cold turkey” which first likely meant “speaking plainly” and now people think it means something like the cold goosepimply sweats an addict in withdrawal gets.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/wordplay/why-do-we-quit-cold-turkey#:~:text=The expression first appeared in,'cold turkey' treatment."

Language doesn’t always make sense.  “Gay” started out meaning “carefree” and then moved to more careless morally, so a prostitute might be labeled gay and a brothel was called a “gay house” (back in the 1600s).  The 1890s may have been the first time it referred to a type of homosexual, a younger man in a relationship with an older one.  It probably got its current usage in the 1920s.  There isn’t really any connection between the original “carefree” meaning and the current “homosexual” one, but would you suggest people stop using it because of that?

https://www.gayly.com/history-word-“gay”#:~:text=In 1951%2C gay appeared in,who or what is acceptable.

[Calm]

1 hour ago, Dario_M said:

But why did you had that status? Or...where you misbehaving a bit haha. 😅 i can remember that 2 years ago i couldn't upvote you. 

Testing my memory….She wanted to ask a lot of questions and started too many threads at once iirc.  A lot of them were cross posting from post Mormon boards which was its own problem.  Back then it was a significant issue because we had a lot of active threads, but they would die early if they were moved to the next page because people would forget about them.  From what I could see Tacenda figured out she could still ask her questions by finding recent threads that related, but it took forever for her to get off limited because she had been let off once and then quickly got back into the habit of too many new threads.

Even now with a slower board, if you start posting too many threads at once, you risk getting put on limited.  It’s best to have 2, maybe three threads imo opened by one poster and no more going at a time unless they are substantially different, older threads that get reactivated such as Smac does with his threads when there is new news, or they are more scholarly and resist starting another till at least one has moved to the second page.  I based this on the expressions of frustrations I see from posters when we get a lot of repetitive topics from the same poster close together or just flippant ones, etc.  Posters who are frustrated are more likely to report and that can get threads shut down.  If you start to get multiple threads locked at once or warnings on them, best to slow down starting new threads.

Edited November 8, 2024 by Calm

[Dario_M]

1 hour ago, Calm said:

Testing my memory….She wanted to ask a lot of questions and started too many threads at once iirc.  A lot of them were cross posting from post Mormon boards which was its own problem.  Back then it was a significant issue because we had a lot of active threads, but they would die early if they were moved to the next page because people would forget about them.  From what I could see Tacenda figured out she could still ask her questions by finding recent threads that related, but it took forever for her to get off limited because she had been let off once and then quickly got back into the habit of too many new threads.

Even now with a slower board, if you start posting too many threads at once, you risk getting put on limited.  It’s best to have 2, maybe three threads imo opened by one poster and no more going at a time unless they are substantially different, older threads that get reactivated such as Smac does with his threads when there is new news, or they are more scholarly and resist starting another till at least one has moved to the second page.  I based this on the expressions of frustrations I see from posters when we get a lot of repetitive topics from the same poster close together or just flippant ones, etc.  Posters who are frustrated are more likely to report and that can get threads shut down.  If you start to get multiple threads locked at once or warnings on them, best to slow down starting new threads.

Aaawh now i understand why Poor Tacenda got off limited. I didn't know that those things can happen on here. I wish i was also off limited, then at least nobody can downvote me anymore. ⬇️ 

So...getting off limited is not the result of bad behavoir...i see. 

[Calm]

15 minutes ago, Dario_M said:

I wish i was also off limited,

Are you saying you want to be given limited status?  If so, you won’t be able to start threads anywhere but in Social (and I am not sure you will be able to start them there as I may be getting that mixed up with new posters).  You will also be limited to only being able to post 10 or maybe 12 posts a day iirc.  Tacenda may remember how many.  There were times she had to go add to her last post in a thread in an edit to add a thought because she couldn’t make a new post.   I would be very annoyed by that.  

And you can’t give rep points yourself just as you can’t get them.  
 

The only reason I would want on Limited was if I was trying to limit how much time I spend on the board because I don’t have the self discipline to limit myself as is obvious by the number of posts I have and how I post all night, lol.

[Dario_M]

26 minutes ago, Calm said:

Are you saying you want to be given limited status?  If so, you won’t be able to start threads anywhere but in Social (and I am not sure you will be able to start them there as I may be getting that mixed up with new posters).  You will also be limited to only being able to post 10 or maybe 12 posts a day iirc.  Tacenda may remember how many.  There were times she had to go add to her last post in a thread in an edit to add a thought because she couldn’t make a new post.   I would be very annoyed by that.  

Okay, that can be complicated. And not being able to make topics is also a bummer. Because i like to make topics. 

But it will be nice to not receive downvotes again. 

26 minutes ago, Calm said:

And you can’t give rep points yourself just as you can’t get them.  
 

Oh really. That's also a big bummer. 

26 minutes ago, Calm said:

The only reason I would want on Limited was if I was trying to limit how much time I spend on the board because I don’t have the self discipline to limit myself as is obvious by the number of posts I have and how I post all night, lol.

Yes i have the same haha. I just can't handle myself and keep posting a lot. 

[Calm]

Yeah…I see it is 2 am and I need to break the early morning habit or I will never get back to my morning swimming routine.

[Dario_M]

12 minutes ago, Calm said:

Yeah…I see it is 2 am and I need to break the early morning habit or I will never get back to my morning swimming routine.

Aaawh that's late in the night. You better go to bed. Goodnight. 🌌🌠

Edited November 8, 2024 by Dario_M

[Tacenda]

10 hours ago, Dario_M said:

But why did you had that status? Or...where you misbehaving a bit haha. 😅 i can remember that 2 years ago i couldn't upvote you. 

Yes, I was just being me. I was forgiven so there's hope for those that are on "limited" out there. 

[Dario_M]

4 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Yes, I was just being me. I was forgiven so there's hope for those that are on "limited" out there. 

 So...you was a bit naughty then weren't you? Hahaha. 🤣 I don't think it is a bad thing to just be yourself. I also just wanna be me. But i also know that you need to watch your steps on here. 😔