Missionary Announcement at Church Yesterday

[rongo]

5 hours ago, Gray said:

I think another thing that needs to change is the culture of perfectionism. People can't feel the spirit when they're made to feel like failures for not obeying all 3000 mission rules robotically. I noticed that my ability to feel the spirit was curtailed dramatically on my mission, compared to the year leading up to my mission. I was too worried about keeping the correct prescribed hours to be able to interact with the Spirit very often. 

I would guess that pressure cooker of perfectionism also drives a lot of people to go home early due to anxiety. 

I trained a lot of greenies on my mission. My hardest one was an eager one who arrived with the first two discussions already memorized in German (very uncommon). He was extremely shy and flustered easily, so it all went out the window in a live situation, but no problem. He was extremely uptight about rules, to a fault (he even made up his own rules that were nowhere near the handbook or anything else). For instance, when we walked into a bakery while street contacting or en route, he refused. He said, "Only on P-day." I asked why, and he insisted that we could only go into a bakery on a P-Day, or the Spirit would leave us. That it only took minutes, or that it was a good thing to interact with shopkeepers and for them to see us, or that is a big part of drinking in the culture didn't matter. He was so adamant about it that I had to comply in the interest of tranquility. We were a tiny branch in a town of 40,000 in East Germany (Halberstadt), and after a few weeks of primarily door-to-door, he said we need to work solely with the members. The branch was very active as far as attendance (around 85%+), and did a very good job of member missionary work as far as they could. This left us with door-to-door when we weren't teaching (I loved door-to-door, so we didn't try to get out of it). When I pointed out in detail each member's situation and options, and that browbeating them about referrals when that field had been plowed would not yield anything and would irritate them, he said, "They told me in the MTC I would have companions like you. And they said, when I did, to look you in the eye and say, 'Let's make this just like the MTC!' " So, we did things his way until he saw that there really was actually nothing left but to knock doors and talk to people. 

One of the biggest things that bothered him was a sweet 90+ year-old woman who asked us to come back at 6:00 that night when we talked to her at her door. When we arrived, she had spent the whole day baking cakes, and she served us hot chocolate and cake on real silver and china. Our impending visit was a big deal to her, and she prepared for it accordingly. She was so lonely! We tried teaching her (his German was non-existent, so it was a one-man band), but she was really just lonely and wanted someone to talk to. We talked a lot about her children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, upbringing, the Communist years, etc. He was fuming that we stayed there when she didn't have interest in being formally taught --- he kept chomping at the bit to go. I think that God was pleased with us being a ray of sunshine for her and spending time with her, and it's a fond memory for me.

I sure hope that he softened a bit throughout his mission. The realities of Germany, without any of the cultural experience or getting to know people in its own right and for its own sake, would drive people insane. I strongly object to calls to eliminate tracting because it is "ineffective." My mission averaged 1-2 baptisms per missionary (I had 8), and we knocked a lot of doors with little apparent success, but my fondest memories are the adventures and discussions I had with people through tracting --- many of which, like the little old lady, didn't bear any numerical fruit. But what a great experience it all was!

[HappyJackWagon]

16 hours ago, Hamba Tuhan said:

Sorry for the wonky formatting

Scott Lloyd- There really aren't that many mission rules, and it's not all that difficult to follow them once one makes up one's mind to be obedient, part of the consecration of time, talents and energies that any mission requires.

What takes energy and causes frustration is rebelliously flinging oneself against the wall. As Paul said, it is hard to kick against the pricks.

This comment kind of blows me away. There aren't that many mission rules? There is an entire extra booklet full of rules that cover everything from extra dress & grooming standards, when to go to bed, when to wake up, how to spend every waking moment of your day, how you can and cannot communicate with family, who you must be with 24/7, restrictions on travel & entertainment, music, reading material, etc. etc.

You may not think the rules are a big deal or particularly hard to follow but claiming there aren't many is ridiculous. There extra rules for virtually every aspect of a missionary's life.

[Gray]

17 minutes ago, Scott Lloyd said:

There really aren't that many mission rules, and it's not all that difficult to follow them once one makes up one's mind to be obedient, part of the consecration of time, talents and energies that any mission requires.

What takes energy and causes frustration is rebelliously flinging oneself against the wall. As Paul said, it is hard to kick against the pricks.

 

The mission rules are numerous and nitpicky. The real problem though is the culture of perfectionism (exact obedience). There are so many mission rules that no one will ever be able to keep all of them. And they will feel like failures when they inevitably sleep in one morning or break some tiny rule to deal with an emergency. That's what separates people from being able to connect with the love of God. 

Edited October 20, 2016 by Gray

[Scott Lloyd]

31 minutes ago, Gray said:

The mission rules are numerous and nitpicky. The real problem though is the culture of perfectionism (exact obedience). There are so many mission rules that no one will ever be able to keep all of them. And they will feel like failures when they inevitably sleep in one morning or break some tiny rule to deal with an emergency. That's what separates people from being able to connect with the love of God. 

I must flatly disagree with the assertion that they are so many that no one will be able to keep all of them.

The rules are limited enough to be contained in a small, pocket handbook. that can be carried everywhere.

Furthermore, they are written clearly enough and they are intuitive enough that they are not onerous. I earnestly disagree that they tax the ability of the average missionary to keep them and to adapt them in case of emergency.

Finally, I contradict the contention that obeying counsel from Church leaders -- be they mission presidents or the General Authorities who oversee the missionary program -- separates people from the Spirit or from the love of God. On the contrary, rebellious disobedience is apt to do that very thing.

 

Edited October 20, 2016 by Scott Lloyd

[Scott Lloyd]

38 minutes ago, HappyJackWagon said:

This comment kind of blows me away. There aren't that many mission rules? There is an entire extra booklet full of rules that cover everything from extra dress & grooming standards, when to go to bed, when to wake up, how to spend every waking moment of your day, how you can and cannot communicate with family, who you must be with 24/7, restrictions on travel & entertainment, music, reading material, etc. etc.

You may not think the rules are a big deal or particularly hard to follow but claiming there aren't many is ridiculous. There extra rules for virtually every aspect of a missionary's life.

See my response to Gray. That "entire extra booklet" is tiny enough to be carried unobtrusively in the inside pocket of a suit jacket or, if need be, in a hip pocket. And I repeat, they are written clearly, the reasoning behind them is intuitive, and they are not onerous -- not to one who does not harbor an attitude of rebellion

Eidted to add:

I linked to the missionary handbook in my response to Gray, but here it is again. Let the reader determine for himself or herself whether the rules contained therein are all that oppressive. Strict? Yes. But as I've pointed out, a mission ought to be viewed by the missionary as a period of consecration.

 

 

Edited October 20, 2016 by Scott Lloyd

[HappyJackWagon]

Quote

I must flatly disagree with the assertion that they are so many that no one will be able to keep all of them.

Scott, have you ever known any person to live all of the mission rules perfectly? I haven't.

Thanks for linking to the handbook for easy reference. Just because something can be shrunk down to fit in a pocket, doesn't mean it is small on content.

If we take out the sections for priesthood ordinances, there are 65 pages of rules. Just look at the table of contents. That looks like more than "not many". 

Quote

Missionary Conduct . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7

Language . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8

Dress and Grooming . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10

Elders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10

Sisters . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12

Schedule . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13

Planning Sessions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15

Study . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15

Language . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16

Sundays and Holidays . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

Proselyting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

Meetings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17

Fasting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Preparation Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

Dress . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

Contents

v

Communicating with Family . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20

Cultural and Recreational Activities . . . . . . . . . 21

Temple Attendance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22

Entertainment . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

Television, Radio, Movies,

Videos, DVDs, Internet . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

Electronic, Video,

and Computer Equipment . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

Cameras . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

Reading . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

Group Activities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

Pornography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27

The Law of Chastity . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

Relationships with Others . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29

Your Companion . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29

Missionary Leaders . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33

Opposite Sex . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33

Children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Members . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Communicating with Converts . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Family Members and Friends . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

General Authorities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38

Missionary Handbook

vi

Community Service . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39

Local Laws and Customs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41

Physical and Temporal Well-Being . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Finances . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Reserve Fund . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Tithing and Fast Offerings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Housing . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Transportation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

Bicycles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47

Automobiles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48

Health and Safety . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50

Health . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50

Safety . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

Security . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51

Missionary Leadership . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55

Ministering and Administering . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56

Example . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57

Attributes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 59

Responsibilities . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60

Meetings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63

vii

Contents

Companion Exchanges . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63

Baptismal Interviews . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65

Appendix A: Guidelines for Couples

and Senior Sisters . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67

Appendix B: Priesthood Ordinances . . . . . . . . . . . . 69

Baptism . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 70

Confirmation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71

Consecrating Oil . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72

Administering to the Sick . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 73

Anointing with Oil . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 74

Sealing the Anointing . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 74

Blessings of Comfort and Counsel . . . . . . . . . . . . 75

Sacrament . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76

Conferring the Priesthood and Ordaining

to Priesthood Offices . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77

Setting Apart Officers and Teachers . . . . . . . . . . . 79

Naming and Blessing Children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80

Dedicating Homes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80

Dedicating Graves . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 81

 

[Scott Lloyd]

48 minutes ago, HappyJackWagon said:

Scott, have you ever known any person to live all of the mission rules perfectly? I haven't.

 

That people don't always live up to every rule perfectly is not a valid argument that the rules shouldn't exist. Traffic regulations are a ready illustration. Most people violate one or more of them from time to time, but without them, venturing onto streets and highways would be not just inconvenient but would be fraught with peril.
 

Quote

 

Thanks for linking to the handbook for easy reference. Just because something can be shrunk down to fit in a pocket, doesn't mean it is small on content.

If we take out the sections for priesthood ordinances, there are 65 pages of rules. Just look at the table of contents. That looks like more than "not many". 

 

 

 

The handbook would no doubt be greatly reduced in size if all it were was a list of rules. But much of it is by way of providing reasoning, background and explanations for the rules. Would you have it any other way? I remind you that over on the thread about the bishop banning electronic devices in the chapel, you have advocated that good reasons be given for putting a rule in place (a point on which I agree with you, by the way).

But having provided the link, I'll leave it to the individual reader to decide whether the rules in the handbook are onerous, oppressive or nonsensical.

Edited October 20, 2016 by Scott Lloyd

[rongo]

7 minutes ago, Scott Lloyd said:

I remind you that over on the thread about the bishop banning electronic devices in the chapel, you have advocated that good reasons be given for putting a rule in place (a point on which I agree with you, buy the way).

Scott, I've been very patient, but I have to speak out. I can't hold back any longer.

"Buy" is a verb meaning "to purchase." 

"By" is a preposition, which should have been used in this case.

[Just giving you a hard time, Scott . . .  Even the best of us make grammar and usage mistakes]

[HappyJackWagon]

7 minutes ago, Scott Lloyd said:

That people don't always live up to every rule perfectly is not a valid argument that the rules shouldn't exist. 

But earlier you said...

I must flatly disagree with the assertion that they are so many that no one will be able to keep all of them.

I sense a conflict between these two positions. In the first quote you imply that just because someone can't keep all the rules doesn't mean the rule isn't important. But the second quote states that the rules are not so plentiful that it would be impossible for a person to keep all of them.

But having provided the link, I'll leave it to the individual reader to decide whether the rules in the handbook are onerous, oppressive or nonsensical.

While I would argue against this, it wasn't the point of the conversation. The point was about a culture of perfectionism and how failure to keep every rule causes tremendous guilt and that a missionary's disobedience could be the reason why a potential investigator isn't led into the church. I think Gray's initial comment about the culture of perfectionism is valid and that failure to be perfect in keeping all mission rules sets the missionary up for failure and guilt.

 

[Scott Lloyd]

7 minutes ago, rongo said:

Scott, I've been very patient, but I have to speak out. I can't hold back any longer.

"Buy" is a verb meaning "to purchase." 

"By" is a preposition, which should have been used in this case.

[Just giving you a hard time, Scott . . .  Even the best of us make grammar and usage mistakes]

Thank you.

Fixed.

[Scott Lloyd]

3 minutes ago, HappyJackWagon said:

 

Quote

That people don't always live up to every rule perfectly is not a valid argument that the rules shouldn't exist. 

But earlier you said...

I must flatly disagree with the assertion that they are so many that no one will be able to keep all of them.

I sense a conflict between these two positions. In the first quote you imply that just because someone can't keep all the rules doesn't mean the rule isn't important. But the second quote states that the rules are not so plentiful that it would be impossible for a person to keep all of them.

Look carefully at what I wrote. I never said it would be impossible to keep all of them. I said that if they are violated occasionally, that's not a valid argument for saying they shouldn't exist.

 

Quote

 

But having provided the link, I'll leave it to the individual reader to decide whether the rules in the handbook are onerous, oppressive or nonsensical.

While I would argue against this, it wasn't the point of the conversation. The point was about a culture of perfectionism and how failure to keep every rule causes tremendous guilt and that a missionary's disobedience could be the reason why a potential investigator isn't led into the church. I think Gray's initial comment about the culture of perfectionism is valid and that failure to be perfect in keeping all mission rules sets the missionary up for failure and guilt.

 

I don't concede that there is a "culture of perfectionism" leading to "tremendous guilt," or that the rules now in place as reflected in the handbook are unreasonable or that they lead inexorably to such a thing.

Again, I've provided the link; let the reader determine for him/herself.

[Gray]

1 hour ago, Scott Lloyd said:

I must flatly disagree with the assertion that they are so many that no one will be able to keep all of them.

The rules are limited enough to be contained in a small, pocket handbook. that can be carried everywhere.

Furthermore, they are written clearly enough and they are intuitive enough that they are not onerous. I earnestly disagree that they tax the ability of the average missionary to keep them and to adapt them in case of emergency.

Do you know anyone who was able to keep all of the rules? Personally I do not, even those who earnestly tried. 

The size of the book isn't particularly relevant. There are many rules packed in there that govern all aspects of the missionary's life. And that doesn't include additional rules the mission president might have come up with too. 

 

1 hour ago, Scott Lloyd said:

Finally, I contradict the contention that obeying counsel from Church leaders -- be they mission presidents or the General Authorities who oversee the missionary program -- separates people from the Spirit or from the love of God. On the contrary, rebellious disobedience is apt to do that very thing.

 

I reject the idea that the commandments of men, however well intentioned, can never cause people to stumble. Unless of course you think mission presidents and other church leaders are infallible. I experienced what I have experienced - and my experience is that the perfectionism and the rules orientation of missionary life impedes the Spirit. It did for me. Perhaps other personalities can thrive under such singular conditions. 

[Scott Lloyd]

36 minutes ago, Gray said:

Do you know anyone who was able to keep all of the rules? Personally I do not, even those who earnestly tried. 

 

I've never taken any surveys or closely tracked anyone's behavior in this regard.

But I repeat, the fact that some occasionally violate rules is not a valid argument for discontinuing them. That reasoning would have us eliminating all traffic regulations just because there are often violations. That would be insane.

 

Quote

The size of the book isn't particularly relevant. There are many rules packed in there that govern all aspects of the missionary's life. And that doesn't include additional rules the mission president might have come up with too.

Again, I've linked to the handbook on line so people can read it and judge for themselves whether the rules are onerous, oppressive or unnecessary.

They are essentially the same ones that were in place when i served my mission; I never had any trouble observing them. Nor has my missionary son, that he has ever said. He has mentioned briefly, though, that missionaries who don't observe the rules have made things difficult for others in the missino.
 

Quote

I reject the idea that the commandments of men, however well intentioned, can never cause people to stumble.

 

I thought we were talking here specifically about missionary rules.

Quote

Unless of course you think mission presidents and other church leaders are infallible. I experienced what I have experienced - and my experience is that the perfectionism and the rules orientation of missionary life impedes the Spirit. It did for me. Perhaps other personalities can thrive under such singular conditions. 

Again, the rules are written plainly. Let each determine for himself whether they would be apt to impede the Spirit.

[Jeanne]

3 hours ago, rongo said:

I trained a lot of greenies on my mission. My hardest one was an eager one who arrived with the first two discussions already memorized in German (very uncommon). He was extremely shy and flustered easily, so it all went out the window in a live situation, but no problem. He was extremely uptight about rules, to a fault (he even made up his own rules that were nowhere near the handbook or anything else). For instance, when we walked into a bakery while street contacting or en route, he refused. He said, "Only on P-day." I asked why, and he insisted that we could only go into a bakery on a P-Day, or the Spirit would leave us. That it only took minutes, or that it was a good thing to interact with shopkeepers and for them to see us, or that is a big part of drinking in the culture didn't matter. He was so adamant about it that I had to comply in the interest of tranquility. We were a tiny branch in a town of 40,000 in East Germany (Halberstadt), and after a few weeks of primarily door-to-door, he said we need to work solely with the members. The branch was very active as far as attendance (around 85%+), and did a very good job of member missionary work as far as they could. This left us with door-to-door when we weren't teaching (I loved door-to-door, so we didn't try to get out of it). When I pointed out in detail each member's situation and options, and that browbeating them about referrals when that field had been plowed would not yield anything and would irritate them, he said, "They told me in the MTC I would have companions like you. And they said, when I did, to look you in the eye and say, 'Let's make this just like the MTC!' " So, we did things his way until he saw that there really was actually nothing left but to knock doors and talk to people. 

One of the biggest things that bothered him was a sweet 90+ year-old woman who asked us to come back at 6:00 that night when we talked to her at her door. When we arrived, she had spent the whole day baking cakes, and she served us hot chocolate and cake on real silver and china. Our impending visit was a big deal to her, and she prepared foOuch!!!r it accordingly. She was so lonely! We tried teaching her (his German was non-existent, so it was a one-man band), but she was really just lonely and wanted someone to talk to. We talked a lot about her children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, upbringing, the Communist years, etc. He was fuming that we stayed there when she didn't have interest in being formally taught --- he kept chomping at the bit to go. I think that God was pleased with us being a ray of sunshine for her and spending time with her, and it's a fond memory for me.

I sure hope that he softened a bit throughout his mission. The realities of Germany, without any of the cultural experience or getting to know people in its own right and for its own sake, would drive people insane. I strongly object to calls to eliminate tracting because it is "ineffective." My mission averaged 1-2 baptisms per missionary (I had 8), and we knocked a lot of doors with little apparent success, but my fondest memories are the adventures and discussions I had with people through tracting --- many of which, like the little old lady, didn't bear any numerical fruit. But what a great experience it all was!

Ouch!!!   I guess this is where you found out that patience was a virtue.  I was just thrilled when missionaries got to wear sunglasses..didn't know they couldn't before.,

[Gray]

14 hours ago, Scott Lloyd said:

I've never taken any surveys or closely tracked anyone's behavior in this regard.

But I repeat, the fact that some occasionally violate rules is not a valid argument for discontinuing them. That reasoning would have us eliminating all traffic regulations just because there are often violations. That would be insane.

I wouldn't say we need to get rid of all of them. Some of them are there for safety, and some of them exist because missionaries aren't always that mature. But there are rules to govern, I believe, literally every aspect of missionary life. That's just too much. And the expectation of perfection (exact obedience) is taking things way too far. 

 

 

Edited October 21, 2016 by Gray

[cdowis]

13 minutes ago, Gray said:

I wouldn't say we need to get rid of all of them. Some of them are there for safety, and some of them exist because missionaries aren't always that mature. But there are rules to govern, I believe, literally every aspect of missionary life. That's just too much. And the expectation of perfection (exact obedience) is taking things way too far. 

 

 

And what specific changes do you recommend?  Let's talk about it.

 

[Gray]

5 minutes ago, cdowis said:

And what specific changes do you recommend?  Let's talk about it.

 

Good question. I'll probably be away from the forums over the weekend, but let's discuss later

[Rock_N_Roll]

I had a senior companion who told me he had decided that we would celebrate any baptism we had by going to a movie.  Movies were against the rules.  We were together for 4 months.  I saw 4 movies. He was my favorite companion.

Edited October 21, 2016 by Rock_N_Roll

[ERMD]

I agree--way to many rules that are hard to keep.  Just like those pesky commandments.  I mean, who can follow all of them?  We should ditch the ones that seem to just get in the way of things and keep the ones that make the most sense and don't make us uncomfortable or seem too hard to follow all the time!  And some of them are so hard, anyway. Who came up with all of them?  Was he really serious?  Is there some purpose to them that we don't really understand?

Naaaaaaa.  Can't be that.

[Scott Lloyd]

On October 21, 2016 at 2:42 PM, Gray said:

Good question. I'll probably be away from the forums over the weekend, but let's discuss later

Well, I've linked twice now to the Missionary Handbook, where the rules are written clearly. I await with curiosity your take on specifically which, if any, are impossible for a typical missionary to obey. 

[Scott Lloyd]

1 hour ago, ERMD said:

I agree--way to many rules that are hard to keep.  Just like those pesky commandments.  I mean, who can follow all of them?  We should ditch the ones that seem to just get in the way of things and keep the ones that make the most sense and don't make us uncomfortable or seem too hard to follow all the time!  And some of them are so hard, anyway. Who came up with all of them?  Was he really serious?  Is there some purpose to them that we don't really understand?

Naaaaaaa.  Can't be that.

Jesus said, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect" (Matthew 5:48). 

What's with Him? Is He trying to foster a culture of perfection among His disciples or something?

[Calm]

Here is a summary of the handbook that could be helpful if no one wants to go into the PDF and copy/paste the actual rules without the reasoning, etc. so we can have a count and list to see if there are any unreasonable ones.  

Sheer number is not an indication of difficulty if most are already being kept and one doesn't have to alter anything.  Otoh, ones that might be seen as simple for most might be impossible for a few (getting up at a certain time took a mission out of being a possibility for me as a young adult and now a traditional senior mission is impossible as well, but we might do one we can do from home come my husband's retiring).  However for this discussion I would suggest that rules that were expected to be kept prior to a mission be ignored as well as ones that would come easy to the majority of missionaries (though these would have to be agreed upon) and focus on only those that would be difficult to keep either because it is something quite new, requires too much time or is seen as an unreasonable standard by a poster in this discussion.

http://www.mormonmissionprep.com/mission-life/mission-rules/

[Scott Lloyd]

1 hour ago, Calm said:

Here is a summary of the handbook that could be helpful if no one wants to go into the PDF and copy/paste the actual rules without the reasoning, etc. so we can have a count and list to see if there are any unreasonable ones.  

Sheer number is not an indication of difficulty if most are already being kept and one doesn't have to alter anything.  Otoh, ones that might be seen as simple for most might be impossible for a few (getting up at a certain time took a mission out of being a possibility for me as a young adult and now a traditional senior mission is impossible as well, but we might do one we can do from home come my husband's retiring).  However for this discussion I would suggest that rules that were expected to be kept prior to a mission be ignored as well as ones that would come easy to the majority of missionaries (though these would have to be agreed upon) and focus on only those that would be difficult to keep either because it is something quite new, requires too much time or is seen as an unreasonable standard by a poster in this discussion.

http://www.mormonmissionprep.com/mission-life/mission-rules/

I note from this summary that there is some leeway allowed with couple missionaries or sisters over age 40 with regard to the proselyting schedule. 

Edited October 23, 2016 by Scott Lloyd

[Calm]

7 hours ago, Scott Lloyd said:

I note from this summary that there is some leeway allowed with couple missionaries or sisters over age 40 with regard to the proselyting schedule. 

I doubt they would go along with no schedule whatsoever, which is what it seems like these days.  Who knows maybe in 10 years, never thought I would be doing as well now just four months ago.

[Gray]

On 10/21/2016 at 9:15 AM, cdowis said:

And what specific changes do you recommend?  Let's talk about it.

 

I suppose there are rules I would change for different reasons. I would change the rules on the way they dress not because they're a significant challenge to obey, but because they put a barrier between the missionary and the people they're trying to teach.

Regarding the daily schedule (page 14 in the manual), I would make that more of a suggestion, especially the specific routine in the morning, and suggest to missionaries that they take personal relaxation time each day for their own mental health. Give them some examples of schedules and then allow them to formulate their own that works best. No one can perfectly follow any specific schedule every day for two years. Again, part of the problem is expecting perfect obedience, and another part of the problem is we're not giving missionaries enough rope to make their own decisions, which I think makes things tougher for them when they return to the real world. 

This is a big one:

Quote

Write to your family each week on preparation day. Limit correspondence with others. Share your spiritual experiences. Never include anything confidential, sensitive, or negative about the areas where you serve

They shouldn't try to dictate what they can say to their families. They should feel free to talk about anything they need to. Family is their support network. Communication should be open and honest. It needs to be. 

 

Quote

E-Mail. You may communicate with your family and mission president by e-mail, according to approved guidelines. Use only MyLDSMail.net, the filtered service established by the Church. Do not use any other e-mail service or any other

Again, far too restrictive and controlling. 

 

Quote

You may telephone your parents on Christmas and one other time during the year (usually Mother’s Day), according to guidelines from your mission president. Take care that these calls do not pull your thoughts away from your service or create a financial problem for your family. Keep them short (preferably no longer than 30 or 40 minutes). Other than these calls, do not telephone family members or friends unless you have permission from your mission president. Visits from family members, friends, and acquaintances are against Church policy.

The impact of such visits may extend far beyond the visit itself, both before and after the visit and among other missionaries. It can often take some time for missionaries to refocus on 37 Missionary Conduct 35996_000_co02_hdbk.qxd 06-01-2006 12:18 PM Page 37 their callings and their work. While expressing your love and your desire to share your experiences with them after you have been released, help those who may want to visit you to understand the importance of maintaining singleness of heart and mind on the work of the Lord (see Matthew 10:37–39; Luke 9:61–62)

I would guess this kind of rule contributes to people having breakdowns on their mission. Put people in a pressure cooker, isolate them from their support networks, and watch the negative consequences roll in.