Serious Question

[poptart]

Hi guys,

 

so, um, not sure how to ask this so here we go, how does the LDS church feel about homosexuality/bisexaulity?  I know you guys value family and all that and theres a bit of a draw since my family life was super abusive, but i'm bi and most Christians in the USA really hate anything thats not hetrosexual. 

[The Nehor]

That is an interesting question.

Really, I find it fascinating.

Obviously we want to know why you ask.

Love and family are important to LDS.

Lots of interest here and there is definitely no acrostic in this post.

[poptart]

That is an interesting question.

Really, I find it fascinating.

Obviously we want to know why you ask.

Love and family are important to LDS.

Lots of interest here and there is definitely no acrostic in this post.

Ok, was thinking of talking to the missionaries.  I had a super abusive childhood and still not really all there.  Mom isn't Mormon but did go to BYUH.  My father runined everything and I barely got out of it all in one piece.  That being said, I know a few people now who are LDS and even though they're not perfect they atleast have people in their lives who have their act together.  The one thing that scares me away, the stance on homosexuality.  Like I said, I'm bi and and I'm also super liberal.  I'm not a loud faschist liberal, but I do tend to act, think and vote that way and in the past had conservative religious people really come down on me hard when asked about my views. 

[Tacenda]

The LDS people have been taught to live like saints (I watched a movie with Bill Murray called St. Vincent, and it dawned on me why they were named Latter Day "Saints", I'm slow on the uptake) therefore the "saints" would take you in in a second. But would frown on you acting out your bi-sexuality (that sounds dumb) but at the same time loving you. Just as our Heavenly Father does, because that's how they're taught to behave. And although I may not be a full believer, I've witnessed their behaviour enough to know.

And I'm sorry that you had to go through all that, how have you coped? If you don't mind me asking. By the way, check out the church's website called mormonsandgays.org for more information. You'd be amazed at the amount of LGBT that are LDS, the stigma is there, that they're unwelcome, but we can overcome it and start a change,

Edited October 30, 2014 by Tacenda

[cdowis]

https://www.lds.org/topics/same-gender-attraction?lang=eng

 

You might want to "chat" with the missionaries at mormon.org  They would very much like to speak with you and answer your specific concerns.

Edited October 30, 2014 by cdowis

[Tacenda]

Thanks for that link cdowis!

[poptart]

The LDS people have been taught to live like saints (I watched a movie with Bill Murray called St. Vincent, and it dawned on me why they were named Latter Day "Saints". I'm slow on the uptake) therefore the "saints" would take you in in a second. But would frown on you acting out your bi-sexuality (that sounds dumb) but at the same time loving you. Just as our Heavenly Father does, because that's how they're taught to behave. And although I may not be a full believer, I've witnessed their behaviour enough to know.

And I'm sorry that you had to go through all that, how have you coped? If you don't mind me asking. By the way, check out the church's website called mormonsandgays.org for more information. You'd be amazed at the amount of LGBT that are LDS, the stigma is there, that they're unwelcome, but we can overcome it and start a change,

I never knew.  Mom worked at the polynesian culture center for a bit (I believe) then things started to get bad.  As far as coping goes, I'm still a mess personally.  I can function just fine, but I really tend not to care about much since no one except mom never really cared about me and since she's not from the mainland US a lot of people were really really racist to her.  Most people tend to just laugh about that and say grow up, pft you try growing up seeing people who treat the non abusive parent that way.

 

Hmm, I don't really act on it per say, but A lot of my choices sure aren't super hetrosexual.  I'm just not that way.  On the bright side I love disney movies and hate a lot of the trashy hollywood junk.  Also Lindsey Serling is nice but  like Adam Young (guy from Owl City, Lindsey works with him a lot) muuuch more.

 

 

https://www.lds.org/topics/same-gender-attraction?lang=eng

 

You might want to "chat" with the missionaries at mormon.org  They would very much like to speak with you and answer your specific concerns.

Wow, thats pretty nice.  I remember about a month ago seeing a video leaked of some poor kid from the south making a video of his coming out.  First his religious parents bring up religion, then its a non stop barrage of slurs and hate. 

I'm not an in your face person but it just disgusts me how mean some religious people can be.  This is why I tend to wonder why the dying often have no family visit them in the hospital, how bad were they to their kids?

[Storm Rider]

If you look on this site you will see a a high number of threads and comments about those who have same sex attraction.  We also have many contributors here who are actively gay and those who are not.  

 

The ideal is that we accept people for who they are; our mission is to call all to come unto Christ.  We teach that we should forgive as Jesus forgives us.  We try to accept people where they are at and teach them the gospel of Christ.  To enter the waters of baptism is to take upon ourselves the name of Christ.  As his disciples we strive to follow him; to live his commandments and teachings.  

 

Each member responds to the call of discipleship at different levels.  Some respond immediately and completely while some of the rest of us are lukewarm in our approach.  We believe that true happiness and joy come from living the gospel of Christ.  Heartache, the kind that truly vexes the soul comes from disobedience to Christ's teachings.  

 

It is not about who were are today that is important, but who Christ will make us as new creatures in him.  Once baptized you will receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost - the third member of the Godhead and he can be our constant companion to guide and teach us.  

 

You are not unique.  You will find other members of the Church that have suffered all kinds of things.  As I said before, Christ washes all of that away and makes us new in him.  All of the burden that we have carried around for so long he takes away from us.  

 

We always talked in our family about acknowledging that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we treat other people.  

[Boanerges]

The ideal is that the gospel is for everyone and there's room for all. The reality is probably a bit different from that depending on where you live. You are likely to encounter bigotry. If you are sexually active you will be called to repentance. If your sexual activity is with same sex partners, the call to repentance will be more profound, and if you become a member of the church you will be required to refrain from same sex intimate relations with the threat of excommunication of you engage.

 

There are understanding members who do exhibit the pure love of Christ and there are leaders who also do so. Unfortunately, both are a relatively small minority and this has brought great sadness to many who are LGBT and those who love them.

[Buckeye]

If you want serious answers to your question I recommend you go to the primary sources rather than hear spin from me and others.

 

http://mormonsandgays.org/

https://www.lds.org/topics/same-gender-attraction?lang=eng

http://www.mormon.org/faq/stand-on-homosexuality

http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/article/interview-oaks-wickman-same-gender-attraction

 

In a nutshell, Mormons are taught to love those with SSA, but never approve of acting upon the attraction. You will notice a trend in church literature that there are few, if any, references to "being gay." Instead, it is referred to as an attraction that people are expected to overcome in this life or the next.

 

There are some members who hold out hope that doctrines could change and homosexuality/bisexuality be included within our doctrine. Such members tend to cling to historical changes, such polygamy, which the church has recently said came into the church and then left the church through a long process of learning "line upon line." Perhaps the same could happen for our gay brothers and sisters. But there is no indication that any of the current decision-makers in the church is open to such a change.

[cdowis]

Indeed, in many ways we all have sexual urges.  The issue is our behaviour, how we appropriately handle those urges, not our orientation.

Edited October 30, 2014 by cdowis

[poptart]

If you look on this site you will see a a high number of threads and comments about those who have same sex attraction.  We also have many contributors here who are actively gay and those who are not.  

 

The ideal is that we accept people for who they are; our mission is to call all to come unto Christ.  We teach that we should forgive as Jesus forgives us.  We try to accept people where they are at and teach them the gospel of Christ.  To enter the waters of baptism is to take upon ourselves the name of Christ.  As his disciples we strive to follow him; to live his commandments and teachings.  

 

Each member responds to the call of discipleship at different levels.  Some respond immediately and completely while some of the rest of us are lukewarm in our approach.  We believe that true happiness and joy come from living the gospel of Christ.  Heartache, the kind that truly vexes the soul comes from disobedience to Christ's teachings.  

 

It is not about who were are today that is important, but who Christ will make us as new creatures in him.  Once baptized you will receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost - the third member of the Godhead and he can be our constant companion to guide and teach us.  

 

You are not unique.  You will find other members of the Church that have suffered all kinds of things.  As I said before, Christ washes all of that away and makes us new in him.  All of the burden that we have carried around for so long he takes away from us.  

 

We always talked in our family about acknowledging that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we treat other people.  

Wow there are activly gay posters here?  Last place I would have looked.  I was expected to be tossed out.  Nothing against organized religon at all.  It's just the biggotry that disgusts me, especially against those that are outside the mainstream.  From what I know of Jesus it was the people no one wanted that he associated with, not the "normal" people.  Infact it was the "normal" people, the Jewish elite who harassed Pilot to no end to have him crucified, even having Barabas (spelling?) turned loose instead?  Nice people.

 

 

The ideal is that the gospel is for everyone and there's room for all. The reality is probably a bit different from that depending on where you live. You are likely to encounter bigotry. If you are sexually active you will be called to repentance. If your sexual activity is with same sex partners, the call to repentance will be more profound, and if you become a member of the church you will be required to refrain from same sex intimate relations with the threat of excommunication of you engage.

 

There are understanding members who do exhibit the pure love of Christ and there are leaders who also do so. Unfortunately, both are a relatively small minority and this has brought great sadness to many who are LGBT and those who love them.

See, thats something that I would have to draw the line on.  I grew up around a lot of really nasty, racist neibors since I had to live in bad parts of town and between the bigotry and racism it really took its toll.  Mentally I am quite fragile and may end up going back to therapy sometime soon so thats the last thing I'm going to put up with.  No one diserves to be treated that way and I will never put up with it.

 

If you want serious answers to your question I recommend you go to the primary sources rather than hear spin from me and others.

 

http://mormonsandgays.org/

https://www.lds.org/topics/same-gender-attraction?lang=eng

http://www.mormon.org/faq/stand-on-homosexuality

http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/article/interview-oaks-wickman-same-gender-attraction

 

In a nutshell, Mormons are taught to love those with SSA, but never approve of acting upon the attraction. You will notice a trend in church literature that there are few, if any, references to "being gay." Instead, it is referred to as an attraction that people are expected to overcome in this life or the next.

 

There are some members who hold out hope that doctrines could change and homosexuality/bisexuality be included within our doctrine. Such members tend to cling to historical changes, such polygamy, which the church has recently said came into the church and then left the church through a long process of learning "line upon line." Perhaps the same could happen for our gay brothers and sisters. But there is no indication that any of the current decision-makers in the church is open to such a change.

Does this mean they would send sister missionaries after me instead of the elders?  lol

 

Indeed, in many ways we all have sexual urges.  The issue is our behaviour, how we appropriately handle those urges, not our orientation.

I agree.  One thing that scares me about the whole acceptance thing is that pedophiles use the same logic.  Tolorance is all well and good, but when you start harming others I say its time to have someone like law enforcment step in. 

[sethpayne]

That is an interesting question.

Really, I find it fascinating.

Obviously we want to know why you ask.

Love and family are important to LDS.

Lots of interest here and there is definitely no acrostic in this post.

 

Sometimes you can really be tone-deaf and insensitive, Nehor.

Edited October 30, 2014 by sethpayne

[The Nehor]

Sometimes you can really be tone-deaf and insensitive, Nehor.

I resent that. Only "sometimes"?

[california boy]

It is true that the church is very family oriented. But those families have to be heterosexual families.  There is no place in the church for gay families and no place in the church for gay couples.  If you are interested in only heterosexual relationships, then definitely investigate the church.  If you are gay and want a family or some kind of relationship with someone of the same sex, then the Mormon church is not the church for you.  Sorry.

 

I am one of the gay posters.  I love the church, but I can't be a part of it.  Me and my boyfriend would not be welcomed.

[cdowis]

I am one of the gay posters.  I love the church, but I can't be a part of it.  Me and my boyfriend would not be welcomed.

 

 

  The church itself would  accept you, but I agree the social atmosphere may not and the bishop may be able to find a way around this.  I think you should talk with the bishop about it.

 

For example, nobody needs to know your situation unless you make a big deal about it.  But you may find it hard not to declare yourself to everyone.

[poptart]

  The church itself would  accept you, but I agree the social atmosphere may not and the bishop may be able to find a way around this.  I think you should talk with the bishop about it.

 

For example, nobody needs to know your situation unless you make a big deal about it.  But you may find it hard not to declare yourself to everyone.

IRL I'm not obvious about it.  I get asked if I'm gay sometimes by women, but then again the ones who do tend to have other issues and are used to men hitting on them all the time.  Also, I am bi so technically I'm not gay. 

I really don't make a huge deal about it so I hope its not a big thing.  I just wanted some kind of support.  Like I said I may (more like likely) go back to a psychologist as I came out of a very bad enviroment a few months ago and I just want to be treated well. 

 

here, be forward, this is graphic.  These are the type of religious people I grew up around and what comes to mind when I think of how religious people here treat bi/gay people as well as anyone not mainstream (or lucky enough to be close to it).  Sorry, know a lot of you aren't like this but this is what I had to put up with as a kid. 

[Mola Ram Suda Ram]

It is true that the church is very family oriented. But those families have to be heterosexual families.  There is no place in the church for gay families and no place in the church for gay couples.  If you are interested in only heterosexual relationships, then definitely investigate the church.  If you are gay and want a family or some kind of relationship with someone of the same sex, then the Mormon church is not the church for you.  Sorry.

 

I am one of the gay posters.  I love the church, but I can't be a part of it.  Me and my boyfriend would not be welcomed.

This is mostly accurate. Every one is welcome. But you are right that you cannot be in full fellowship and be in a gay relationship.

 

You and your boy friend would still be welcomed to attend church but you probably could not take the sacrament and you probably could not participate in any ordinances. That would be between you and your bishop and God. So I will refrain from making a judgement

 

So if you want to be a member and act on your urges then this church may present some issues. If you can bridle your passions and you are willing to make a commitment then this church will work out great. Even the adulterer is welcome. What is not welcome is the unrepentant sinner. Jesus said, "Go and sin no more".

[california boy]

There are certainly some Mormon parents who would react like that.  My father didn't take me being gay particularly well.  But I am also sure there are some parents that would be more supportive.  

 

Cdowis is basically right.  If you pretend to be straight in the Mormon church, things will be much better for you.  If however you have a boyfriend, the church will let you come to church but would probably not let you get baptized or participate in church.  You would not be able to hold any callings or allowed to give talks or prayers and wquld be asked not to take the sacrament.  There is some discussion if this would apply to a gay couple if they were celibate.  I think the jury is still out on that one.  

 

Edit.  Looks like you answered the same question.  Just a little quicker than me.

Edited October 30, 2014 by california boy

[poptart]

This is mostly accurate. Every one is welcome. But you are right that you cannot be in full fellowship and be in a gay relationship.

 

You and your boy friend would still be welcomed to attend church but you probably could not take the sacrament and you probably could not participate in any ordinances. That would be between you and your bishop and God. So I will refrain from making a judgement

 

So if you want to be a member and act on your urges then this church may present some issues. If you can bridle your passions and you are willing to make a commitment then this church will work out great. Even the adulterer is welcome. What is not welcome is the unrepentant sinner. Jesus said, "Go and sin no more".

Honestly I would be the last person you would want for calings.  I have mental problems and am not stable at all.  Once I get some thing straightened out, well, who knows. 

Yeah, thats the thing, I think I'm a bit more gay than bi and could not see myself in a serious relationship with a woman.  Part of that is due to a really bad life and distrust.  Also I've heard of some people shaming couples into having kids, and due to being used in the past the second I sense I feel like I'm going to be pressued I will wash my hands and walk, fast.  Know its rash but i've had way too many bad things happen in the past and cannot take it anymore.

[Avatar4321]

I think you should start by seeking out the Lord. Read the scriptures and meet with the missionaries.

it seems like you are seeking healing. That comes through Christ. You need to get to know Him. The church can help you

[poptart]

I think you should start by seeking out the Lord. Read the scriptures and meet with the missionaries.

it seems like you are seeking healing. That comes through Christ. You need to get to know Him. The church can help you

Times are a lot better now that I'm out of a really bad living situation, but I want support of some kind.  I don't feel like going back on SSRI's, those things ruin your metabolism and made feel just awful.  I just want people that care.

[DaddyB]

Hi guys,

 

so, um, not sure how to ask this so here we go, how does the LDS church feel about homosexuality/bisexaulity?  I know you guys value family and all that and theres a bit of a draw since my family life was super abusive, but i'm bi and most Christians in the USA really hate anything thats not hetrosexual. 

The whole idea of having a church that is literally Christ's, or God's church, is to learn from God about how to behave in a way that will make us truly happy. Just because you or I have formed an opinion of what we think is right or wrong, doesn't mean we know all that God know's about that issue. The first step is to find out if this actually is God's church and that the people claiming to be his spokesmen are what they claim to be. Then we can follow their counsel in seeking guidance from God directly and through the scriptures to learn where we may be mistaken and discover better ways of living to bring us true joy and happiness. Don't worry too much about specific issues, because if God really does teach his children here on earth through living prophets, we can be sure they will not agree with every idea we have come up with. Otherwise, everyone would be in agreement and we would not need guidance from church or revelation from God.

[Avatar4321]

People of the church will care.

[Calm]

They might care too much in some cases.