My time here

[poptart]

Wanted to ask who remembered when i first came here?  Those of you who do, my father just died.  Was dawning on me last night after leaving the hospital of all the things that happened because of that man, one of them was I would have never been involved with the LDS church nor Christianity as I was, before that I was and well, am more or less secular.  To quote a Nun I used to know up there, i'm "natural" not "super natural reasoning wise.  Deep down, my beliefs are more or less pagan, esoteric/occultish leaning with an appreciation for traditional culture as being a pillar of civilization.  I've yet to ever understand the deeper religious feelings Christians in the states tend to have nor the wierd emphasis on a personal relationship with diety American Protestants seem to be so hung up on. 

I let him part peacefully, considering this was the man who almost killed my mother, lied to the cops, almost had me charged with a felony that resulted in me taking a restraining order I was waaaay nicer to him in the end than he deserved.  At the very least, I can't be bothered from beyond by him, I let him go without spite.  I'm more or less back where I was 5 years ago, location and everything, starting up my old life again.  My experience in WA further cemented my distrust of people in general.   Still, think I will keep in touch with the LDS i know, I have to give you all credit, considering american degeneracy besides foreign born, hispanic and Polish Catholics you're about the only religious group in the states that still fights degeneracy and values family. 

If I had my way I'd be paying this at the funeral.

 

[Jane_Doe]

I'm glad you've enjoyed/benefitted from your time here, and that you're starting to grow as a person.

[poptart]

1 minute ago, Jane_Doe said:

I'm glad you've enjoyed/benefitted from your time here, and that you're starting to grow as a person.

The church needs more swag, more candles, robes and guilt, like the idea of everyone walking out a little guilty for whatever sin they committed and no one knows about.  Happiness is someone else's suffering and there's no guilt like Catholic guilt. 

[Jane_Doe]

19 minutes ago, poptart said:

The church needs more swag, more candles, robes and guilt, like the idea of everyone walking out a little guilty for whatever sin they committed and no one knows about.  Happiness is someone else's suffering and there's no guilt like Catholic guilt. 

Man, this forum needs a laugh button.  (That was a joke, right?)

[poptart]

18 minutes ago, Jane_Doe said:

Man, this forum needs a laugh button.  (That was a joke, right?)

Or get a pope like this...

 

[juliann]

1 hour ago, poptart said:

The church needs more swag, more candles, robes and guilt, like the idea of everyone walking out a little guilty for whatever sin they committed and no one knows about.  Happiness is someone else's suffering and there's no guilt like Catholic guilt. 

Ha. I'm so sorry for your difficulties but I'm glad you are here. 

[Jeanne]

Poptart...I think I may have known you many moons ago on another site  Perhaps I am wrong..but though I try to help in communication with you in another time..In hope you haven't given up on what I thought was genuine  friendship...with some genuine concern.  In any case..all of us have troubles..you have taught me many things in endurance and honest human nature in your search for your own happiness and in your desire to always seek a better way.  Hugs to you.

[poptart]

Here's one, what's holding us Here?   Family tears eachother appart then we die,  why not just end it all when life becomes too much?  We're all trash, not like we matter.

Edited October 25, 2017 by poptart

[Tacenda]

2 hours ago, poptart said:

Here's one, what's holding us Here?   Family tears eachother appart then we die,  why not just end it all when life becomes too much?  We're all trash, not like we matter.

What if this life is it, why not make the best of it? Easier said than done, I know. I understand the pain, some nights I actually think of myself under a guillotine, which is really weird. And the next day is so much better and then back to those dumb thoughts, and then the next day better. We just need to keep holding on because of the wonderful moments we might miss, if not.

[3DOP]

Now just for the record people...There hasn't been any Pope Pius XIII yet. Would there was! 

poptart, what the heck was that? Who made that? Almost everybody not me here would hate it if it was real. I warily endorse what I heard. I would like to see and hear more before giving an unequivocal endorsement. You liked it? Good.

May your father deserve to rest in peace. I can't say I could have good hope based on what you say, but there is always some hope. You seem to have done the right thing there with your poor Dad. Maybe he didn't have so many advantages either, huh? All that gets thrown into the mix...for the judgment you know. I hope you and he can meet in a happy and forgiving and forgetful place (heaven, duh.). I think I remember your first appearances. I admit I thought you were pretty messed up. Maybe we agree about that? In any case...May Jesus and Mary and Joseph, and the angels and the saints, and your guardian angel and mine help us...I need help too. Pray for a fellow sinner, poptart. God love you.

Rory

 

[Tacenda]

58 minutes ago, 3DOP said:

Now just for the record people...There hasn't been any Pope Pius XIII yet. Would there was! 

poptart, what the heck was that? Who made that? Almost everybody not me here would hate it if it was real. I warily endorse what I heard. I would like to see and hear more before giving an unequivocal endorsement. You liked it? Good.

May your father deserve to rest in peace. I can't say I could have good hope based on what you say, but there is always some hope. You seem to have done the right thing there with your poor Dad. Maybe he didn't have so many advantages either, huh? All that gets thrown into the mix...for the judgment you know. I hope you and he can meet in a happy and forgiving and forgetful place (heaven, duh.). I think I remember your first appearances. I admit I thought you were pretty messed up. Maybe we agree about that? In any case...May Jesus and Mary and Joseph, and the angels and the saints, and your guardian angel and mine help us...I need help too. Pray for a fellow sinner, poptart. God love you.

Rory

 

Rory, just noticed stomach acid as one of your interests!! Totally cracked me up and made a lot of sense! 

[The Nehor]

3 hours ago, Tacenda said:

What if this life is it, why not make the best of it? Easier said than done, I know. I understand the pain, some nights I actually think of myself under a guillotine, which is really weird. And the next day is so much better and then back to those dumb thoughts, and then the next day better. We just need to keep holding on because of the wonderful moments we might miss, if not.

If this life is all there is and this life becomes unbearable then exiting it seems logical.

[Tacenda]

9 hours ago, The Nehor said:

If this life is all there is and this life becomes unbearable then exiting it seems logical.

I wish I believed for sure I'll be reunited with loved ones that have passed on, but I don't know for sure. And sometimes if we think there is a better life after this one, will we work on life now as hard? I don't go by my own advice though, and I don't take each day as if it's my last. Sometimes we as LDS that think we have eternity to work on our relationships might be taking for granted that it might not happen, and if so, we need to work as if it's out only lifetime, does that make sense? 

I sure do hope for an afterlife, and really want proof that there is. But still can't understand how some would throw it all away if there isn't an afterlife. 

[The Nehor]

10 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

I wish I believed for sure I'll be reunited with loved ones that have passed on, but I don't know for sure. And sometimes if we think there is a better life after this one, will we work on life now as hard? I don't go by my own advice though, and I don't take each day as if it's my last. Sometimes we as LDS that think we have eternity to work on our relationships might be taking for granted that it might not happen, and if so, we need to work as if it's out only lifetime, does that make sense? 

I sure do hope for an afterlife, and really want proof that there is. But still can't understand how some would throw it all away if there isn't an afterlife. 

I find the opposite to be true. Those who live in hope for a better world tend to do the most to improve this one. Oh, and there is another life beyond this one. It is beautiful beyond belief.

That knowledge keeps me going when things get horrific....like today when a friend’s sister and her kids were beaten to death last night by her boyfriend. This is not a nice world.

[poptart]

15 hours ago, 3DOP said:

Now just for the record people...There hasn't been any Pope Pius XIII yet. Would there was! 

poptart, what the heck was that? Who made that? Almost everybody not me here would hate it if it was real. I warily endorse what I heard. I would like to see and hear more before giving an unequivocal endorsement. You liked it? Good.

May your father deserve to rest in peace. I can't say I could have good hope based on what you say, but there is always some hope. You seem to have done the right thing there with your poor Dad. Maybe he didn't have so many advantages either, huh? All that gets thrown into the mix...for the judgment you know. I hope you and he can meet in a happy and forgiving and forgetful place (heaven, duh.). I think I remember your first appearances. I admit I thought you were pretty messed up. Maybe we agree about that? In any case...May Jesus and Mary and Joseph, and the angels and the saints, and your guardian angel and mine help us...I need help too. Pray for a fellow sinner, poptart. God love you.

Rory

 

Series they made last year, young pope. Think it was made by an Italian tv station,  season 2 should be out next year.  It's a good series, check it out.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Young_Pope

Honestly, I want another urban we need one.  

It's out of my hands, he had way more advantages in life than I did, amazing thing is as bad a life he lived his siblings were worse.  I did what none of them would do, honestly it was pretty easy.  One lesson I've taken from this,  never underestimate the power of human spite, people will take grudges to the grave.

2 hours ago, The Nehor said:

I find the opposite to be true. Those who live in hope for a better world tend to do the most to improve this one. Oh, and there is another life beyond this one. It is beautiful beyond belief.

That knowledge keeps me going when things get horrific....like today when a friend’s sister and her kids were beaten to death last night by her boyfriend. This is not a nice world.

Curious, we're the kids His?   Hope he gets put in general population, he'll get his.  This is one reason why I've always thought dating someone who's childless when you have kids is a horrible idea, my father was horrible to my half brothers and pretty much everyone I knew from a blended family had similar experiences.  Bottom line unless they have kids you're taking a big gamble, as a rule people hate kids that aren't theirs, that's life.  Fyi, in my line of work I've seen quite a bit of murder suicides involving girlfriends and kids, amazing how little of that gets reported. 

[Jeanne]

3 hours ago, The Nehor said:

I find the opposite to be true. Those who live in hope for a better world tend to do the most to improve this one. Oh, and there is another life beyond this one. It is beautiful beyond belief.

That knowledge keeps me going when things get horrific....like today when a friend’s sister and her kids were beaten to death last night by her boyfriend. This is not a nice world.

Ugh...this is horrible...it is getting more difficult to see the beaut;y of this earthly life...The word hope is the hanger that keeps me from falling.  I know that you will give and share what you can to those who knew this family.   May you find the words..and the heart that will ring true.   I don't KNOW anything for absolutely sure..but there are moments in this mortal sphere that tells me someone is watching over me.

[The Nehor]

1 hour ago, poptart said:

Series they made last year, young pope. Think it was made by an Italian tv station,  season 2 should be out next year.  It's a good series, check it out.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Young_Pope

Honestly, I want another urban we need one.  

It's out of my hands, he had way more advantages in life than I did, amazing thing is as bad a life he lived his siblings were worse.  I did what none of them would do, honestly it was pretty easy.  One lesson I've taken from this,  never underestimate the power of human spite, people will take grudges to the grave.

Curious, we're the kids His?   Hope he gets put in general population, he'll get his.  This is one reason why I've always thought dating someone who's childless when you have kids is a horrible idea, my father was horrible to my half brothers and pretty much everyone I knew from a blended family had similar experiences.  Bottom line unless they have kids you're taking a big gamble, as a rule people hate kids that aren't theirs, that's life.  Fyi, in my line of work I've seen quite a bit of murder suicides involving girlfriends and kids, amazing how little of that gets reported. 

No, he also had a child with her and the baby survived. 

[poptart]

20 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

No, he also had a child with her and the baby survived. 

I have a really good friend who's mom stayed single after the divorce for that reason.  I know there are stories of blended families working out, people win the lottery and get hit by lighting too, all three have something in common, they're not.  People are people, most cannot see the forest for the trees.

[The Nehor]

1 hour ago, poptart said:

I have a really good friend who's mom stayed single after the divorce for that reason.  I know there are stories of blended families working out, people win the lottery and get hit by lighting too, all three have something in common, they're not.  People are people, most cannot see the forest for the trees.

I have seen it work too often to worry about it. Plus at this point if I do marry odds are good that (for better or worse) I will be a stepdad.

[poptart]

1 hour ago, Jeanne said:

Ugh...this is horrible...it is getting more difficult to see the beaut;y of this earthly life...The word hope is the hanger that keeps me from falling.  I know that you will give and share what you can to those who knew this family.   May you find the words..and the heart that will ring true.   I don't KNOW anything for absolutely sure..but there are moments in this mortal sphere that tells me someone is watching over me.

I used to have Interesting conversations with saints over things like this, the world has almost always been this way, it's just that as a people the usa has had it so good for so long.  Look at Europe, the amount of time that they've been at each others throats and murdered millions is beyond count.  Look at us society, we go out of our way to screw people to the point where they're in jail, homeless, etc.  Big suprise they act the way they do when the law and society pushes someone to the point where they may as well kill themselves, like any cornered animal they lash out violently.  As it is we may see someone like Spencer (the guy from Charlottesville) as president someday because no one can get along anymore.  Question I have is when push comes to shove how bad will it get before things change, or will we destroy our country first?

[poptart]

6 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

I have seen it work too often to worry about it. Plus at this point if I do marry odds are good that (for better or worse) I will be a stepdad.

That's the other thing,  I don't like children.  Id marry outside of the usa or get a bf first.  That's actually a big deal to me, besides not being willing to be in that situation I have such a horrible temper i would need a lot of therapy to fix that, motivation isn't there.  Call me selfish in that regard,  I very much am.  Besides lack of belief i always pictured that as something that would keep me out of the church.

Edited October 25, 2017 by poptart

[The Nehor]

44 minutes ago, poptart said:

That's the other thing,  I don't like children.  Id marry outside of the usa or get a bf first.  That's actually a big deal to me, besides not being willing to be in that situation I have such a horrible temper i would need a lot of therapy to fix that, motivation isn't there.  Call me selfish in that regard,  I very much am.  Besides lack of belief i always pictured that as something that would keep me out of the church.

I like kids and for some reason they seem to like and trust me. Not sure if that would make me a good father or not. It does make me a beloved uncle and that may be all I get in this life.

[3DOP]

18 hours ago, Tacenda said:

Rory, just noticed stomach acid as one of your interests!! Totally cracked me up and made a lot of sense! 

Tacenda, I am glad you were amused! I made that list a long time ago. When they asked for interests, I couldn't think where to start. All those things popped in to my head as I was writing. There is some logical sequence. For instance, I recall stomach acid and lava going together.

Thanks for the note.

Rory

[poptart]

9 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

I like kids and for some reason they seem to like and trust me. Not sure if that would make me a good father or not. It does make me a beloved uncle and that may be all I get in this life.

I've never had paternal instincts, and when I think about how I would probably be worse than my father i made the choice long ago to only get involved with the childless, blended families are absolutely off the table.   Considering how I'm ok with my end involving me walking infront of a commuter train just to ruin someone's day plus all the other issues i have that no one would be willing to tolerate I'm happy with my choice.   I'm too happy watching the world burn to bother myself with someone else's child, not like anyone ever has cared about my issues in life. 

[The Nehor]

1 minute ago, poptart said:

I've never had paternal instincts, and when I think about how I would probably be worse than my father i made the choice long ago to only get involved with the childless, blended families are absolutely off the table.   Considering how I'm ok with my end involving me walking infront of a commuter train just to ruin someone's day plus all the other issues i have that no one would be willing to tolerate I'm happy with my choice.   I'm too happy watching the world burn to bother myself with someone else's child, not like anyone ever has cared about my issues in life. 

Please do not do that to a poor train conductor.