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Nehor Rants About Online Dating


The Nehor

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Posted
4 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Mostly looking in 31 to 45 age range where I am roughly in the middle. I am too old for a YSA ward and my current ward needs me.

Every time I come to this thread I have this overpowering urge to tell you about my niece.  So there, now I have.

Posted
15 hours ago, The Nehor said:

And why shouldn’t I be?

 

Oh yeah.....the crippling loneliness. ;) 

Do you know how many non LDS GOOD WOMEN that are out there....waiting for you to perhaps baptize....convert ...and love???  Many younger women than you would love this...!!

Posted
8 hours ago, Jeanne said:

Do you know how many non LDS GOOD WOMEN that are out there....waiting for you to perhaps baptize....convert ...and love???  Many younger women than you would love this...!!

To think of all those LDS singles, that are missing out on some wonderful people, it makes me sad. I have a single friend that is older than me, she is waiting to meet her husband in the hereafter. I don't know why she can't go out and do meetups, and forget what religion they belong to. Look at the whole person. 

Posted
22 hours ago, Stargazer said:

Every time I come to this thread I have this overpowering urge to tell you about my niece.  So there, now I have.

Matchmaker, Matchmaker, 🎵
Make me a match,
Find me a find,
catch me a catch      🎼
Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Look through your book,
And make me a perfect match 🎶

Posted
5 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Because I need someone who can support and understand my faith from the inside.

And share that faith... in the very smallest, and largest, of life moments... including as you visit the Lord's House...

GG

Posted

Ok, I need to read this entire thread, but I started the joys of online dating and ack!  

It is exhausting.  I ask a question, they answer, I comment about their answer and I ask another question, they answer again.  This goes on for 3-4 questions and I usually just give a final response back to an answer.  

I am sure half of them are baffled on why I quit asking questions because they seem to truly enjoy the questions and answering them.....but if they are actually interested, wouldn’t they ask me something?  I do give credit for the ones who answer and follow it up with an “and you”.

Dates with LDS guys are few and far between due to where I live.  Dates with non-LDS are plentiful, but just tend to have one sided attraction (theirs or mine, doesn’t really matter if it isn’t mutual).

Oh and the stories....so many.

Posted

Oh and He-Man singing the 4 Non-Blondes song totally made my day and made coming out of hiding on this site again worth it.

Now I will go back to just reading.  🙂

Posted
9 hours ago, emeliza said:

Oh and He-Man singing the 4 Non-Blondes song totally made my day and made coming out of hiding on this site again worth it.

Now I will go back to just reading.  🙂

Thanks for your thoughts. We miss you. And yeah, that video always makes me smile.

Posted
11 hours ago, The Nehor said:

More fun experiences:

- Ran into a girl who felt that the first thing she had to do was share every sexual kink she has. Brave of her, but incredibly weird that it was in the second communication. I am not sure if this is intentional self-sabotage or some kind of desperation to find someone compatible. Doubt that will go anywhere.

- Ran into another who insists she is faithful LDS except that she needs coffee every morning and likes a glass or two of wine every night. Yeah, Word of Wisdom is a relatively minor sin but.....pass.

- Got barraged by another woman who rapid fired questions about seemingly minute things in my lifestyle. I am guessing she is either looking for a perfect replacement for her ex or someone who has nothing common with him. Pass.

- Got told by another woman that my occasional playing of video games shows I am still an arrested adolescent. Her profile has a pic of her in a Disney Princess outfit and she raves about going to Disneyworld every year and her collection of children's movies. Really? You really want to try to play the juvenile card?

I feel I am getting towards the end of my periodic excursion in online dating. That I babysat four small kids last night and they are usually good but not last night put me off the whole family thing for at least a day or two.

Speed dating? Face to face date? Maybe you need to meet in person? Pick those very few that barely make it through and take a chance? Try ward members and ask to be lined up with anyone they might see as a prospect? I met my husband through a blind date, haha. As silly as people appear on FB or elsewhere, may surprise you. Good luck, and hope all goes well. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Tacenda said:

Speed dating? Face to face date? Maybe you need to meet in person? Pick those very few that barely make it through and take a chance? Try ward members and ask to be lined up with anyone they might see as a prospect? I met my husband through a blind date, haha. As silly as people appear on FB or elsewhere, may surprise you. Good luck, and hope all goes well. 

Most of the Bishopric is trying to hook me up. I have gotten a few dates but never went anywhere sadly. My last time speed dating was awful. Then again it was an LDS speed dating activity so (insert joke of choice here). 

Posted
15 hours ago, The Nehor said:

More fun experiences:

1- Ran into a girl who felt that the first thing she had to do was share every sexual kink she has. Brave of her, but incredibly weird that it was in the second communication. I am not sure if this is intentional self-sabotage or some kind of desperation to find someone compatible. Doubt that will go anywhere.

2- Ran into another who insists she is faithful LDS except that she needs coffee every morning and likes a glass or two of wine every night. Yeah, Word of Wisdom is a relatively minor sin but.....pass.

3- Got barraged by another woman who rapid fired questions about seemingly minute things in my lifestyle. I am guessing she is either looking for a perfect replacement for her ex or someone who has nothing common with him. Pass.

4- Got told by another woman that my occasional playing of video games shows I am still an arrested adolescent. Her profile has a pic of her in a Disney Princess outfit and she raves about going to Disneyworld every year and her collection of children's movies. Really? You really want to try to play the juvenile card?

I feel I am getting towards the end of my periodic excursion in online dating. That I babysat four small kids last night and they are usually good but not last night put me off the whole family thing for at least a day or two.

Trust your instincts. Reamin in arrested adolescence; I've been in that stage for decades and still going strong.  Also, learning about the MGTOW movement might help...

The people who know you from this forum, and recommend potential dates, are people who know you or at least your online-self and know someone who might fit well with that.

Posted (edited)
9 minutes ago, nuclearfuels said:

Trust your instincts. Reamin in arrested adolescence; I've been in that stage for decades and still going strong.  Also, learning about the MGTOW movement might help...

As in what direction not to go?

Quote

Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW /ˈmɪɡtaʊ/) is a mostly pseudonymous online community[2][3] of men supported by websites and social media presences[4] cautioning men against serious romantic relationshipswith women, especially marriage.[5][6]

The community is part of what is more broadly termed the manosphere.[7] MGTOW have "...vowed to stay away from women, stop dating and not have children".[8] MGTOW focuses on men's self-ownership rather than changing the status quo through activism and protest, making MGTOW distinct from the men's rights movement.[9] The Southern Poverty Law Center has identified MGTOW as a fringe supremacist group.[10]

Wikipedia

Edited by Calm
Posted
2 minutes ago, Calm said:

As in what direction not to go?

Wikipedia

Correct. Wikipedia is not the direction / source to follow and is a website where anyone can write anything about any topic.

Neither is the Southern Poverty Law Center.

Weaponized divorce courts are not things to be taken lightly, MRA and MGTOW recognize that.

Posted (edited)

Are you approving or disapproving of MGTOW?

Edited by Calm
Posted
45 minutes ago, nuclearfuels said:

Trust your instincts. Reamin in arrested adolescence; I've been in that stage for decades and still going strong.  Also, learning about the MGTOW movement might help...

The people who know you from this forum, and recommend potential dates, are people who know you or at least your online-self and know someone who might fit well with that.

The MGTOW movement is a bunch of misogynists who think responsibility is for chumps.

Posted
33 minutes ago, nuclearfuels said:

Correct. Wikipedia is not the direction / source to follow and is a website where anyone can write anything about any topic.

Neither is the Southern Poverty Law Center.

Weaponized divorce courts are not things to be taken lightly, MRA and MGTOW recognize that.

Mostly a myth about the divorce courts. In 91% of custody cases custody is decided without a ruling (I.e. they agree) and when men fight for custody they get it over half the time.

If you are involved in the MRA and MGTOW movements get out now before it is too late. I am serious. They are incredibly toxic cultures. RUN!!!!!!!!

Posted
1 minute ago, The Nehor said:

Mostly a myth about the divorce courts. In 91% of custody cases custody is decided without a ruling (I.e. they agree) and when men fight for custody they get it over half the time.

If you are involved in the MRA and MGTOW movements get out now before it is too late. I am serious. They are incredibly toxic cultures. RUN!!!!!!!!

Just for fun- let's assume responsibility is not for chumps.  Should we not seek more responsibility after proving acceptable at managing our current levels of responsibility?  I have a hard time reconciling such ambition with the fact that callings aren't linear and one does not "advance" in priesthood or other callings. I think seeking ever increasing responsiblity is why some people, of our faith and otherwise, end up getting divorced; some people are not built physically, mentally, emotionally, etc. to get married and have a lot of children; and that's all part of God's plan - Songs Sung and Unsung (https://www.lds.org/media-library/video/2018-01-0120-songs-sung-and-unsung?lang=eng)

And in full disclosure I'm not leading MRA or MGTOW movements, but addressing the logic/fallacies of their ideas interests me. 

Posted (edited)
30 minutes ago, nuclearfuels said:

Just for fun- let's assume responsibility is not for chumps.  Should we not seek more responsibility after proving acceptable at managing our current levels of responsibility?  I have a hard time reconciling such ambition with the fact that callings aren't linear and one does not "advance" in priesthood or other callings. I think seeking ever increasing responsiblity is why some people, of our faith and otherwise, end up getting divorced; some people are not built physically, mentally, emotionally, etc. to get married and have a lot of children; and that's all part of God's plan - Songs Sung and Unsung (https://www.lds.org/media-library/video/2018-01-0120-songs-sung-and-unsung?lang=eng)

And in full disclosure I'm not leading MRA or MGTOW movements, but addressing the logic/fallacies of their ideas interests me. 

I don't have a problem if a man decides after careful self examination he, marriage, and children are not a good fit.

However, the reasoning the MGTOW community appears to use to get there would have men believing there is no community that they should be looking towards for guidance, no community that values them for what they are....completely contrary to the Gospel and the purpose of the Church.  It also appears to place a man as superior to God (since God is a part of the "all else").

From a MGTOW site:

Quote

MGTOW - Men Going Their Own Way - is a statement of self-ownership, where the modern man preserves and protects his own sovereignty above all else. It is the manifestation of one word: "No". Ejecting silly preconceptions and cultural definitions of what a man is. Looking to no one else for social cues. Refusing to bow, serve and kneel for the opportunity to be treated like a disposable utility. And, living according to his own best interests in a world which would rather he didn't

 

Edited by Calm
Posted
57 minutes ago, Calm said:

I don't have a problem if a man decides after careful self examination he, marriage, and children are not a good fit.

However, the reasoning the MGTOW community appears to use to get there would have men believing there is no community that they should be looking towards for guidance, no community that values them for what they are....completely contrary to the Gospel and the purpose of the Church.  It also appears to place a man as superior to God (since God is a part of the "all else").

From a MGTOW site:

 

MGTOW as an organization are a lot like Ayn Rand devotees but crank the misogyny up to maximum.

Posted
On 10/21/2018 at 8:11 PM, The Nehor said:

More fun experiences:

- Ran into a girl who felt that the first thing she had to do was share every sexual kink she has. Brave of her, but incredibly weird that it was in the second communication. I am not sure if this is intentional self-sabotage or some kind of desperation to find someone compatible. Doubt that will go anywhere.

- Ran into another who insists she is faithful LDS except that she needs coffee every morning and likes a glass or two of wine every night. Yeah, Word of Wisdom is a relatively minor sin but.....pass.

- Got barraged by another woman who rapid fired questions about seemingly minute things in my lifestyle. I am guessing she is either looking for a perfect replacement for her ex or someone who has nothing common with him. Pass.

- Got told by another woman that my occasional playing of video games shows I am still an arrested adolescent. Her profile has a pic of her in a Disney Princess outfit and she raves about going to Disneyworld every year and her collection of children's movies. Really? You really want to try to play the juvenile card?

I feel I am getting towards the end of my periodic excursion in online dating. That I babysat four small kids last night and they are usually good but not last night put me off the whole family thing for at least a day or two.

Good heavens.  The more I hear about others' experiences in online dating, the more I am amazed by my own.  It was just... amazing.  

I love the one about the Disney princess.  Someone doesn't have much self-awareness, and it isn't you.

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