15 Ways To Help People In A Difficult Faith Transition Over Historical And Doctrinal Issues

[Rodeo]

Bottom line is homosexual behavior is a sin. Thats the whole point.

[california boy]

Bottom line is homosexual behavior is a sin. Thats the whole point.

I don't think that ANYONE has said otherwise.  We are all very clear that the church views any sex outside of marriage as being a sin.  And that the church views homosexual relationships even within the bonds of holy matrimony as being a sin.

 

The problem we are having with your posts are statements like "being gay is a choice"   And "intimate relations are the foundational reason we pair up and marry".  I hope that means you are beginning to see otherwise.

Edited September 10, 2014 by california boy

[bcuzbcuz]

Studies have been done that show homosexuals have more sexual encounters with more partners...

I'm wondering if you think that homosexual behaviour among animals, not just primates, but penguins and snails, is their "choice"?

[Rodeo]

I don't think that ANYONE has said otherwise.  We are all very clear that the church views any sex outside of marriage as being a sin.  And that the church views homosexual relationships even within the bonds of holy matrimony as being a sin.

 

The problem we are having with your posts are statements like "being gay is a choice"   And "intimate relations are the foundational reason we pair up and marry".  I hope that means you are beginning to see otherwise.

Homosexual behavior is a choice, plain and simple. And I am quite convinced that the majority of gay people who pursue same sex relationships make that choice whether it be convenience, circumstance, or desire. I have a cousin who was heterosexual and then he went off to Catholic seminary for a few years in an all male school then dropped out suddenly, never said why. Ten years later we found out he was gay and had a partner. My cousin in law in prison was also completely heterosexual when she was incarcerated. Now some twenty years later she is gay and says she will never go back to heterosexuality. I have a niece who hung out a little too much with one of her female friends and ended up trying some homosexual behavior. She later moved, got married, had a kid and has no desire to be with a woman again. I am convinced that homosexual behavior can become a desirable thing in anyone given the right circumstances. Its how we "choose" to act that matters.

[Rodeo]

I'm wondering if you think that homosexual behaviour among animals, not just primates, but penguins and snails, is their "choice"?

Its all choice. Getting back to humans let me ask- Is there a wife beater gene? What about a spouse cheater gene? What about a pedophile gene? What about a masturbation gene? What about a pornography gene?

Those are all choices that people make based off of the sensory inputs in their upbringing combined with culture and the effects of society.

[Calm]

Someone needs to do their family history. Before the advent and availability of modern birth control, most women had a LOT of children. Travel by the husband didn't even seem to slow them up much.

The way the statement was first made it only involved sexual intimacy, not procreation. Iow, it implies people got married to maximize the number and quality of their sexual encounters (this may not be what he meant to state, but if so a better term than "sexual" should have been used). If a spouse is gone more than they are present or if sickness interferes with frequency or quality, than if thefoundation of the relationship is having sex, then there would be good reason for the spouses to look elsewhere for a better match.

However, there are a variety of reasons people get married besides sex, procreation being one of them. In the past a huge motivator for women would be financial security.

[bcuzbcuz]

Its all choice. Getting back to humans let me ask- Is there a wife beater gene? What about a spouse cheater gene? What about a pedophile gene? What about a masturbation gene? What about a pornography gene?Those are all choices that people make based off of the sensory inputs in their upbringing combined with culture and the effects of society.

Well, at least you're consistent. Your list of negative things people choose is indeed long.. But you're also consistently wrong.

Just because I choose to eat a burger, doesn't mean that I can choose to eat or not eat. I can choose to eat now or eat later, but eating itself is not a choice. If you believe we can choose to eat or not, then you must prove that as a possibility

Somehow, because you have lists of choices, such as masturbation, or infidelity, you belief that heterosexuality or homosexuality can be chosen. Do you also believe that defecation is a choice? Do you choose to breathe or not breathe? Can you control you heartbeats?

I'm assuming because you choose to ask the question about genes, that you're looking for someone to expound that homosexuality is genetic. Until research shows a genetic link, all you have is a strawman.

I'll repeat a statement I made before. I am heterosexual without, at any time, ever making a decision that heterosexuality was my choice. I was attracted to the opposite gender before I knew what gender was. Heterosexuality is not a choice. If you insist that it is, you'll have to provide more than repeated statements of your belief, to prove it.

You gave some examples of people incarcerated, who engaged in homosexual activites. That probably says more about your penal system than it does about homosexuality as a choice.

[california boy]

Homosexual behavior is a choice, plain and simple. And I am quite convinced that the majority of gay people who pursue same sex relationships make that choice whether it be convenience, circumstance, or desire. I have a cousin who was heterosexual and then he went off to Catholic seminary for a few years in an all male school then dropped out suddenly, never said why. Ten years later we found out he was gay and had a partner. My cousin in law in prison was also completely heterosexual when she was incarcerated. Now some twenty years later she is gay and says she will never go back to heterosexuality. I have a niece who hung out a little too much with one of her female friends and ended up trying some homosexual behavior. She later moved, got married, had a kid and has no desire to be with a woman again. I am convinced that homosexual behavior can become a desirable thing in anyone given the right circumstances. Its how we "choose" to act that matters.

You are bringing up two issues here.  Yes homosexual behavior is a choice.  So is heterosexual behavior.  Most people choose to find a partner, and be in relationships that bring them a sense of joy and emotional connection.  Whether we are gay or straight, we all choose to have connections with other humans.  Just because you believe that homosexual sex is a sin is no reason to condemn others for making the same choice to connect with someone they love just like you did.  .  It is pretty understandable choice.  God will judge them as He sees fit.  Leave the judgement to Him.

 

The second issue is; can a straight person have gay sex.  Yes of course.  But that doesn't necessarily make them gay.  A gay person can also have straight sex.  That doesn't necessarily make them straight.  Who you have sex with does not determine your orientation.  I have known that I was attracted to the same gender since I was 12 years old. Probably about the same time you started being attracted to girls.   I did everything I could to pretend to be straight.  At the time, my church leaders told me to get married, and these feelings would diminish and maybe even go away.  But being married to someone of the opposite sex does not make you straight. Never in all those years did I ever think I was straight or attracted to the opposite gender.  It is why the church no longer gives gay members that counsel.

[Rodeo]

You are bringing up two issues here.  Yes homosexual behavior is a choice.  So is heterosexual behavior.  Most people choose to find a partner, and be in relationships that bring them a sense of joy and emotional connection.  Whether we are gay or straight, we all choose to have connections with other humans.  Just because you believe that homosexual sex is a sin is no reason to condemn others for making the same choice to connect with someone they love just like you did.  .  It is pretty understandable choice.  God will judge them as He sees fit.  Leave the judgement to Him.

 

The second issue is; can a straight person have gay sex.  Yes of course.  But that doesn't necessarily make them gay.  A gay person can also have straight sex.  That doesn't necessarily make them straight.  Who you have sex with does not determine your orientation.  I have known that I was attracted to the same gender since I was 12 years old. Probably about the same time you started being attracted to girls.   I did everything I could to pretend to be straight.  At the time, my church leaders told me to get married, and these feelings would diminish and maybe even go away.  But being married to someone of the opposite sex does not make you straight. Never in all those years did I ever think I was straight or attracted to the opposite gender.  It is why the church no longer gives gay members that counsel.

According to our religious beliefs homosexual sex is a sin. There is a large agenda out there right now to say that homosexual behavior is natural and not a sin. The devil of course is at the reigns.

[Rodeo]

Well, at least you're consistent. Your list of negative things people choose is indeed long.. But you're also consistently wrong.

Just because I choose to eat a burger, doesn't mean that I can choose to eat or not eat. I can choose to eat now or eat later, but eating itself is not a choice. If you believe we can choose to eat or not, then you must prove that as a possibility

Somehow, because you have lists of choices, such as masturbation, or infidelity, you belief that heterosexuality or homosexuality can be chosen. Do you also believe that defecation is a choice? Do you choose to breathe or not breathe? Can you control you heartbeats?

I'm assuming because you choose to ask the question about genes, that you're looking for someone to expound that homosexuality is genetic. Until research shows a genetic link, all you have is a strawman.

I'll repeat a statement I made before. I am heterosexual without, at any time, ever making a decision that heterosexuality was my choice. I was attracted to the opposite gender before I knew what gender was. Heterosexuality is not a choice. If you insist that it is, you'll have to provide more than repeated statements of your belief, to prove it.

You gave some examples of people incarcerated, who engaged in homosexual activites. That probably says more about your penal system than it does about homosexuality as a choice.

Can you prove that all of the sensory inputs you experienced from being a baby until now have not shaped your choice in sexuality? I have an extended family member that was sexually abusive. at least 2 of his children also grew up to be sexually abusive. Do you think they were just born that way or was it a case of sensory inputs early on?

[JLHPROF]

Can you prove that all of the sensory inputs you experienced from being a baby until now have not shaped your choice in sexuality? I have an extended family member that was sexually abusive. at least 2 of his children also grew up to be sexually abusive. Do you think they were just born that way or was it a case of sensory inputs early on?

 

Basically you're saying that any and all sexual behaviors are basically Pavlovian - caused by our conditioning.

 

Well, we know that pornography is addictive and we can become conditioned to need it.

We know that abuse is often (but not always) repeated by the abused person.

But I don't know that we can state that all heterosexuals and homosexuals gain all their attraction through conditioning - sensory input.  I don't think the evidence is there for that.

 

That being said, whether homosexuality is a choice or something a person is born with, like any other trait, if it leads to sin it must be overcome, not embraced.  Being a natural trait doesn't make it ok.

 

My temper could be something I acquired or it could be genetic, or it could just be who I am.  I am still expected by God to overcome and not lose my temper at people.

My anxiety could be something I acquired or it could be genetic, or it could just be who I am.  I am still expected by God to overcome and have faith to perform his mission for me.

The list of negative traits we have to overcome is endless and can include many sexual traits.  They don't get a free pass just because society has accepted one or some.

 

Our sexual traits may have debatable sources, but God's instructions on sex are clear:  Husband/Wife or Wives/Marriage/Children -> Only acceptable eternal family God has ever allowed.  That will never change, it's eternal in origin.

[readstoomuch]

Bill is an acquired taste and mostly it tastes good,but I choke on things once in awhile. I listen to several podcasts and his is right up there. I like his 15 points, some of them sound like how I survived after I had a faith crisis. I would rather people like my kids run across him than lapsed mormons/anti mormons.

[bcuzbcuz]

Can you prove that all of the sensory inputs you experienced from being a baby until now have not shaped your choice in sexuality? I have an extended family member that was sexually abusive. at least 2 of his children also grew up to be sexually abusive. Do you think they were just born that way or was it a case of sensory inputs early on?

Sensory inputs? Are you kidding? How does anyone, who isn't hooked up to a machine and actively being monitored as to every input that they meet, possibly evaluate every input that their senses come into contact with? Now you're really blowing smoke.

You're saying that, had I been raised by gays and only surrounded by gay inputs, in school, in society, only gay programs on tv, etc. that I would be gay. Prove it.

The closest we can come to anything that would be similar to your idea are children adopted by gay parents. I've had several children, as my students, raised in similar situations. I've had students raised by one biological parent combined with their bonus Mom or Dad,, engaged in a gay relationship, and I've had students who were adopted into a gay partnership, without being biologically linked to either parent. Since I have taught in Canada and Sweden, where the laws and societal pressures to be ""standard heterosexual" are very different to a similar situation in the US, one would expect all of these children to be gay.

Guess what? There are no statistics to back up your supposition. Studies have been done, to ensure that children adopted into a homosexual partnership are not "unduly" influenced. I can provide a long list, if you're interested....and even translate their conclusions, if so needed.

But once again, you muddy the waters by talking about abusive parents passing on abusiveness. That would be similar to children of alcoholics, etc. But abuse and alcohol are selective choices. Attraction to same gender is not a choice.

[DBMormon]

Bill is an acquired taste and mostly it tastes good,but I choke on things once in awhile. I listen to several podcasts and his is right up there. I like his 15 points, some of them sound like how I survived after I had a faith crisis. I would rather people like my kids run across him than lapsed mormons/anti mormons.

 

Glad you aquired me and my tasty podcast!  For those here who care I have done several podcasts on showing the nuance and complexity of Mormonism and I consider them very well done.  and I think if anyone gave them a chance they would get where I come from on doubt, church conflict, and nuance.  Simply Go on the site Mormon Discussion Podcast and search for these or click them below

 

Top 7 episodes to help one see the nuance in Mormonism

- Called of God

- Tithing: Net or Gross

- True and Living Church

- Repercussions of the Race and the Priesthood article

- Garden of Eden: Literal or Figurative

- Was Jesus born on April 6th

- White Shirts 

Edited September 11, 2014 by DBMormon

[Rodeo]

Sensory inputs? Are you kidding? How does anyone, who isn't hooked up to a machine and actively being monitored as to every input that they meet, possibly evaluate every input that their senses come into contact with? Now you're really blowing smoke.

You're saying that, had I been raised by gays and only surrounded by gay inputs, in school, in society, only gay programs on tv, etc. that I would be gay. Prove it.

The closest we can come to anything that would be similar to your idea are children adopted by gay parents. I've had several children, as my students, raised in similar situations. I've had students raised by one biological parent combined with their bonus Mom or Dad,, engaged in a gay relationship, and I've had students who were adopted into a gay partnership, without being biologically linked to either parent. Since I have taught in Canada and Sweden, where the laws and societal pressures to be ""standard heterosexual" are very different to a similar situation in the US, one would expect all of these children to be gay.

Guess what? There are no statistics to back up your supposition. Studies have been done, to ensure that children adopted into a homosexual partnership are not "unduly" influenced. I can provide a long list, if you're interested....and even translate their conclusions, if so needed.

But once again, you muddy the waters by talking about abusive parents passing on abusiveness. That would be similar to children of alcoholics, etc. But abuse and alcohol are selective choices. Attraction to same gender is not a choice.

It can be debated strongly either way. Tell me, why is it that my cousin is now gay after going to an all male Catholic seminary for several years? Why is it that my cousin in law is now gay after being incarcerated in a womens facility for numerous years? These are the only two family members I have who are gay and both of them went from heterosexual to strictly homosexual. Seems to me this "choice" was brought on by their surroundings and sensory inputs. Why was Sodom and Gomorrah destroyed? Because of the rampant homosexuality they chose to get involved with. It was a choice.

[california boy]

It can be debated strongly either way. Tell me, why is it that my cousin is now gay after going to an all male Catholic seminary for several years? Why is it that my cousin in law is now gay after being incarcerated in a womens facility for numerous years? These are the only two family members I have who are gay and both of them went from heterosexual to strictly homosexual. Seems to me this "choice" was brought on by their surroundings and sensory inputs. Why was Sodom and Gomorrah destroyed? Because of the rampant homosexuality they chose to get involved with. It was a choice.

Tell me why I am not straight when I was raised in a heterosexual family?  Saw endless movies, television shows, advertisements etc all repeating the message that I should be straight?  Tell me why I attended a church that preached from the pulpit that I should be straight, but yet I am gay.

 

Have you ever asked your relatives why they are gay?  Does every kid that attends an all male school become gay?  Really.  

[Rodeo]

Tell me why I am not straight when I was raised in a heterosexual family? Saw endless movies, television shows, advertisements etc all repeating the message that I should be straight? Tell me why I attended a church that preached from the pulpit that I should be straight, but yet I am gay.

Have you ever asked your relatives why they are gay? Does every kid that attends an all male school become gay? Really.

I was raised in a strict LDS home, very good parents and upbringing. Why was it then that I became addicted to drugs, alcohol, smoking, and viewing pornography, sex before marriage, fell away from church? Unless I give you a couple key events you would never know what started it all. But regardless, I still made a conscious choice to become sinful. Perhaps I could just argue that I did not choose to have done those things and that I was naturally predisposed to do them because I was born that way. Perhaps Iwas attracted to sin as part of my genetic or DNA makeup. Edited September 11, 2014 by Rodeo

[california boy]

I was raised in a strict LDS home, very good parents and upbringing. Why was it then that I became addicted to drugs, alcohol, smoking, and viewing pornography, sex before marriage, fell away from church? Unless I give you a couple key events you would never know what started it all. But regardless, I still made a conscious choice to become sinful. Perhaps I could just argue that I did not choose to have done those things and that I was naturally predisposed to do them because I was born that way. Perhaps Iwas attracted to sin as part of my genetic or DNA makeup.

 

You never like answering the hard questions do you.  You say your relative went to an all boys school and became gay as proof that being gay is a choice, yet you can't explain why not every boy who goes to an all boy's school doesn't become gay.  Do you think he became gay because he was around other boys?  Really?  What young man isn't around other boys?

 

Now you equate doing drugs, alcohol, smoking and viewing pornography as being the same as who you are attracted to.  Do you really think all of those addictions is the same as your attraction you have had for women?  For your wife?

 

You say that people choose to be gay yet you can't explain why faithful gay Mormons choose to not only be celibate their entire lives, but live alone, without a companion.  I asked you how differently your life would be without your wife and family.  Would you be willing to give up your wife and children and be celibate your whole life just so you could say you were gay?

 

We are not debating the sin of homosexual sex here.  Everyone knows what the church teaches.   We are talking about your assertion that being gay is a choice.  Something the church does not teach.  Now try and answer the question rather than telling us about your sins.

[JLHPROF]

I  really don't see where this back and forth over the genetic or acquired origin of homosexuality has anything to do with the gospel.

 

The simple gospel truth is that homosexual acts are a sin.  Period.

Regardless of where homosexual feelings come from they are to be overcome and destroyed.  Their source is unimportant.  All that matters is overcoming another sinful trait like anger, jealousy, all lusts, fear, anxiety etc.

 

Arguing about origin is pointless.  Learning to overcome a sinful trait is the real issue.

[bcuzbcuz]

It can be debated strongly either way. Tell me, why is it that my cousin is now gay after going to an all male Catholic seminary for several years? Why is it that my cousin in law is now gay after being incarcerated in a womens facility for numerous years? These are the only two family members I have who are gay and both of them went from heterosexual to strictly homosexual. Seems to me this "choice" was brought on by their surroundings and sensory inputs. Why was Sodom and Gomorrah destroyed? Because of the rampant homosexuality they chose to get involved with. It was a choice.

You continually move the goalposts and continually mix voluntary with involuntary and claim all are choices. There are considerable differences between inclination and actions.

But why every single man, woman and child were destroyed in Sodom and Gomorrah, when certain members of the citizenry would be incapable of sinning, I'll leave to scholars to argue.

However, I've tired of this argument of, "Yes, it is.", "No, it isn't." So I withdraw from the field of battle.

[Rodeo]

You never like answering the hard questions do you.  You say your relative went to an all boys school and became gay as proof that being gay is a choice, yet you can't explain why not every boy who goes to an all boy's school doesn't become gay.  Do you think he became gay because he was around other boys?  Really?  What young man isn't around other boys?

 

Now you equate doing drugs, alcohol, smoking and viewing pornography as being the same as who you are attracted to.  Do you really think all of those addictions is the same as your attraction you have had for women?  For your wife?

 

You say that people choose to be gay yet you can't explain why faithful gay Mormons choose to not only be celibate their entire lives, but live alone, without a companion.  I asked you how differently your life would be without your wife and family.  Would you be willing to give up your wife and children and be celibate your whole life just so you could say you were gay?

 

We are not debating the sin of homosexual sex here.  Everyone knows what the church teaches.   We are talking about your assertion that being gay is a choice.  Something the church does not teach.  Now try and answer the question rather than telling us about your sins.

I honestly believe being gay is a choice coupled with various factors of sensory inputs. I think there are a very few cases where something is wrong biologically but I see it as a very rare condition. The majority of gay peoples sexual orietation is because of choice and circumstance. The gay agenda is not a voice of genuine concern for a nature problem, its a voice of lust and following ones own pleasure despite whats right.

[rpn]

 

Having feelings for one gender or another for 99% of people is not a choice.

 

I wonder what DB's source is for this statement.   How can anyone know this for LGBT, pansexual OR for heteros?

[california boy]

I honestly believe being gay is a choice coupled with various factors of sensory inputs. I think there are a very few cases where something is wrong biologically but I see it as a very rare condition. The majority of gay peoples sexual orietation is because of choice and circumstance. The gay agenda is not a voice of genuine concern for a nature problem, its a voice of lust and following ones own pleasure despite whats right.

 

You honestly believe being gay is a choice, but yet you can't seem to honestly answer the questions I have asked.  Obviously your mind has been made up and logic will not change that locked mind.  

 

Live with your beliefs however you want.  Ignore the reality that many gay Mormons face.  Choose to believe they make the choice to be gay because being without a partner and living celibate their entire life is such an alluring, "voice of lust" for them to follow.

 

I have probably spent way too much time on this issue, so I am moving on

[Rodeo]

You honestly believe being gay is a choice, but yet you can't seem to honestly answer the questions I have asked.  Obviously your mind has been made up and logic will not change that locked mind.  

 

Live with your beliefs however you want.  Ignore the reality that many gay Mormons face.  Choose to believe they make the choice to be gay because being without a partner and living celibate their entire life is such an alluring, "voice of lust" for them to follow.

 

I have probably spent way too much time on this issue, so I am moving on

We cannot sit idly by and let wrong become right even though its probably where we are headed anyway. If the gay agenda gets their way it becomes all about "being born that way" and thus they should have every right that heterosexual people have in every facet of life including the same rights afforded in religion (such as temple marriage). Thus sexual morality then gets defined as "whatever one likes" as they can't help that because they "were just born that way" and its just following their natural carnal ways which should be a law unto itself. Thats what Satan is driving for. Sexual morality is not just whatever what one desires or is attracted to. If that was the case then we should just turn our whole world into a no rules orgy party like Sodom and Gomorrah.

Why is it that gay people say it isn't about the sex but yet statistics prove otherwise? http://C***.org/statistics-homosexual-promiscuity

Why is it that gay people engage so much in cross dressing and drag shows if they aren't supposed to be attracted to that sort of opposite gender thing?

Why is it that people accept being gay as something they were born with just as long as they do not make advances on the young because that would cross the line into "choice"? ( In Ancient Greece it was common for a grown male to have sex with a boy of his choosing)

How possibly can someone be born as a bisexual? Should they be allowed to marry both a man and a woman at the same time?

Why is it that gay relationships do not last amongst adult partners? (less than 2 years on average) http://www.frc.org/get.cfm?i=IS04C02

In my opinion these all show that being gay is a choice- its lifestyle saturated in sexual perversion and sin where sex is at the forefront of relationships and promiscuous behavior is normal. Its a sinful plague in our society and we are not that much different in some respects than ancient Rome where homosexual behavior became idolized- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_ancient_Rome

Edited September 11, 2014 by Rodeo

[Rockerwife]

We cannot sit idly by and let wrong become right even though its probably where we are headed anyway. If the gay agenda gets their way it becomes all about "being born that way" and thus they should have every right that heterosexual people have in every facet of life including the same rights afforded in religion (such as temple marriage). Thus sexual morality then gets defined as "whatever one likes" as they can't help that because they "were just born that way" and its just following their natural carnal ways which should be a law unto itself. Thats what Satan is driving for. Sexual morality is not just whatever what one desires or is attracted to. If that was the case then we should just turn our whole world into a no rules orgy party like Sodom and Gomorrah.

Why is it that gay people say it isn't about the sex but yet statistics prove otherwise? http://C***.org/statistics-homosexual-promiscuity

Why is it that gay people engage so much in cross dressing and drag shows if they aren't supposed to be attracted to that sort of opposite gender thing?

Why is it that people accept being gay as something they were born with just as long as they do not make advances on the young because that would cross the line into "choice"? ( In Ancient Greece it was common for a grown male to have sex with a boy of his choosing)

How possibly can someone be born as a bisexual? Should they be allowed to marry both a man and a woman at the same time?

Why is it that gay relationships do not last amongst adult partners? (less than 2 years on average) http://www.frc.org/get.cfm?i=IS04C02

In my opinion these all show that being gay is a choice- its lifestyle saturated in sexual perversion and sin where sex is at the forefront of relationships and promiscuous behavior is normal. Its a sinful plague in our society and we are not that much different in some respects than ancient Rome where homosexual behavior became idolized- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality_in_ancient_Rome

It is posts like these that make it nearly impossible for me, the mother of a beloved gay son to want remain in the church.  Just when I think that people are starting to be more understanding, I read comments like this and realize that there are people who wholeheartedly believe some of the things said here.  

 

The church has come a long way in the way they work with gay individuals.  I have had many talks with bishops, stake presidents and with my Heavenly Father to come to a place of peace regarding my son.  I love him, not in spite of him being gay, but have realized what a blessing I have been given to have him in my life and all the lessons I have learned in raising him.  He is a happy, well adjusted gay man, and is not a member of the church anymore.  He exemplifies the golden rule and is looking for a spouse to spend the rest of his life with.  I want that for him.

 

I will leave it at that.  Except to add that I appreciate efforts being made to help folks like me as I go through a difficult faith transition.