Confessions Of An Lds Bishop

[Okrahomer]

http://www.deseretnews.com/user/comments/765625385/Confessions-of-a-Mormon-bishop.html?pg=2

I was impressed with this "mini-portrait" of an LDS Bishop. It caused me to reflect with great gratitude on Bishops over the years who have watched over and helped me become a better person. Some of the online comments are interesting, particularly those that ask questions related to whether or not it is appropriate for a layman/non-professional to "delve into the darkest corners" of people's lives. I understand the concern; I'm sure Bishops sometimes make errors in their counseling etc.; but for me, the fact that my Bishop is a real human who is subject to the same human frailties as I am and not some dispassionate and detached "professional"--makes the interaction all the more meaningful.

[Duncan]

Bishops are shepherds not Veterinarians. I think good Bishops know who to call if something if beyond them, bad ones try to take care of it themselves and can make matters worse.

[thesometimesaint]

Bishops are shepherds not Veterinarians. I think good Bishops know who to call if something if beyond them, bad ones try to take care of it themselves and can make matters worse.

Agreed, and the better ones already do.

[Okrahomer]

Bishops are shepherds not Veterinarians. I think good Bishops know who to call if something if beyond them, bad ones try to take care of it themselves and can make matters worse.

I guess I've never had a "bad" one.

[Duncan]

I guess I've never had a "bad" one.

you can have my 4!

[Okrahomer]

you can have my 4!

I hope you're kidding, at least a little. And if you're not, what made them so "bad"? Would professional "training" have made them better?

[Brenda]

I hope you're kidding, at least a little. And if you're not, what made them so "bad"? Would professional "training" have made them better?

Four bad bishops? I'd guess the problem was not the bishops.

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

I guess I've never had a "bad" one.

Just live long enough and because they are flawed men (as all men are) it will happen to one degree or another.

[Okrahomer]

Just live long enough and because they are flawed men (as all men are) it will happen to one degree or another.

That's one thing I'm absolutely sure about--I've NEVER had a perfect Bishop.

[Duncan]

Four bad bishops? I'd guess the problem was not the bishops.

And WHA! is that supposed to mean???!!! haha!

[Duncan]

I hope you're kidding, at least a little. And if you're not, what made them so "bad"? Would professional "training" have made them better?

well let's see

Bishop 1 beat all 7 of kids to an inch of their lives, made all their decisions pretty much and forced the 5 to go on missions-of those 5 1 died, but of the 4 remaining only 1 is active and 3 want nothing to do with him or the Church. One of them is an alcoholic and one of them is in and out of jail. One of the other girls ran away from home at 18 got pregnant and came back home for a visit, he was serving as a Bishop and got her exed. He was a Bishop but not her Bishop. The other one who didn't go on a mission got married at like 19 or something, she is active but lives far away from the dad. The guy is a tyrant basically and should have been in jail for what he put those kids through and some fo his beliefs are so out there it just makes you sick sometimes.

Bishop 2-molested his daughter and cheated repeatedly on his wife, before and during his service as a Bishop and threatens his wife if she tells anyone. His daughter slept with some guy at 18 and she got exed, not him but her. The wife complains to the Stake Leaders but is told "oh, he wouldn't do that he's such a nice guy" he then becomes my Bishop and she tells someone 'he stills cheats on me and so...but is again told not to worry about it. After he is done being a Bishop he becomes a Counselor in the Temple Pres. and later passes away. So, he escaped 'justice' here

Bishop 3- My YSA Bishop-his marriage is terrible so rather then deal with that he gets so involved in people's lives and tries to control them and tells them all kinds of CRAZY ideas and pushes people into missions, marriages, school and it has backfired again and again and again. He was so insecure that he sought Church position, constant name dropping, calling dropping, and I suspect he did all these things to get high numbers to make himself look good to become the Stake President when we got a new in 2005, when he wasn't made that guess who moved away a few months later.

Bishop 4-Has been a member of the Church 40 plus years, never read the Book of Mormon and doesn't know much of Church policy, culture despite being on the High Council for about half that time-Thought you become the Church President by applying for it. Micromanager. Ward council members are burned out of the utter waste of time the meetings are, talking about things that are trivial and countless idiotic reports and countless emails and "we take too long to talk about too little" and I fear a mutiny. Nice guy but doesn't know how to deal with people or hold a meeting

For the record I am not perfect and last time I checked I can't walk on water. I am simply saying that things could have been better and because of them and others I have had to overhaul a lot of thinking. Once bitten twice shy

[Calm]

So, he escaped 'justice' here

Would have been better for him if he hadn't.

I was thinking I had no bad bishops...but now that you've reminded me, there were two that ended up being exed due to having affairs. Both had shown some indifference/lack of commitment to the calling while bishop, people brushed it off as just getting tired, but it seems to me that perhaps when one is worthy of the calling (not in the sense of being perfect, but trying to do one's best) that the Lord sustains them. I have heard many former bishops wonder how they managed to do all that was required of them...or rather they state there was no way for them to normally do it, that it was the Lord who got them through.

[Duncan]

Would have been better for him if he hadn't.

I was thinking I had no bad bishops...but now that you've reminded me, there were two that ended up being exed due to having affairs. Both had shown some indifference/lack of commitment to the calling while bishop, people brushed it off as just getting tired, but it seems to me that perhaps when one is worthy of the calling (not in the sense of being perfect, but trying to do one's best) that the Lord sustains them. I have heard many former bishops wonder how they managed to do all that was required of them...or rather they state there was no way for them to normally do it, that it was the Lord who got them through.

well, if I had known about that Bishop, things would have been different let me tell you. I suspect his wife just said forget it and why bother saying anything, although as we know the mills of the Gods grind slow but exceedingly fine.

and for what it's worth I have super duper Bishops that I love to this day, just great men trying to do their calling like everyone else. It's true what you say it's the Lord who pulls them through!

[TAO]

Duncan, you need to move to my ward! We have awesome bishops!

[Duncan]

Duncan, you need to move to my ward! We have awesome bishops!

Sure!

[Okrahomer]

well let's see

Bishop 1 beat all 7 of kids to an inch of their lives, made all their decisions pretty much and forced the 5 to go on missions-of those 5 1 died, but of the 4 remaining...Bishop 4-Has been a member of the Church 40 plus years, never read the Book of Mormon...

For the record I am not perfect and last time I checked I can't walk on water. I am simply saying that things could have been better and because of them and others I have had to overhaul a lot of thinking. Once bitten twice shy

OK, I understand you better now. I apologize if I've made you dredge up anything you'd rather forget.

P.S. As an Okie, I feel confident in saying that any one of the great Bishops in Tulsa, Oklahoma would welcome you into their wards with open arms--especially if you were a Canadian dentist.

[CASteinman]

http://www.deseretne...ishop.html?pg=2

I was impressed with this "mini-portrait" of an LDS Bishop

Thank you for this.

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

That's one thing I'm absolutely sure about--I've NEVER had a perfect Bishop.

I served for three years with one as his 1st who came close. A few years later one of my best friends served as Bishop and I never knew anyone so drunk with power. Our Ward reduced by 1/2 and was ended and merged with another.

[Tacenda]

I'm fortunate that nearly every bishop I've had was nearly perfect once they were put in the calling, not so much before. But that's not the case with the bishopric members...2 counselors and 1 clerk were involved in affairs, all in different wards of course. My husband had a bishop that left his wife for a man. That was quite shocking for him and his ward. My mother would always say that Satan works harder on the righteous people or those with higher visability in the church. Don't know whether to believe it or not.

[Kenngo1969]

I served for three years with one as his 1st who came close. A few years later one of my best friends served as Bishop and I never knew anyone so drunk with power. Our Ward reduced by 1/2 and was ended and merged with another.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46bBWBG9r2o

[urroner]

Duncan, I think it's you who is the problem. You seem to attract lousy bishops like I attract wives who end up not liking me all that much. Shoot, one of them even moved to the other side of the world to get away from me and the other one, well, she must have thought that being married to me was a religious experience because she took on a vow of celibacy afterwards.

Even a poor bishop can be a great example for the rising generation, a great example of what not to do.

Of course, the difference between you and me is I picked my wives, you probably didn't pick your bishops.

[Gillebre]

He picked where he lived.

[Duncan]

He picked where he lived.

well,! All of these brethren, two still live here, one is dead and is rotting in H*LL! haha! and the other moved away so whatever.

Found out on the weekend about another bishop in our stake about 15 years ago now. Not my Bishop mind you, but he was about 30, RM, young family, great wife, great job, nice home, the whole set up. He was transffered out to Alberta and travelled a lot for his job. Well...one thing led to another and he is now totally inactive, divorced, not sure if he is exed or not for his liasons or not but ugh, what a disaster and he doesn't have much to do with his kids which is too bad.

[Duncan]

Duncan, I think it's you who is the problem. You seem to attract lousy bishops like I attract wives who end up not liking me all that much. Shoot, one of them even moved to the other side of the world to get away from me and the other one, well, she must have thought that being married to me was a religious experience because she took on a vow of celibacy afterwards.

Even a poor bishop can be a great example for the rising generation, a great example of what not to do.

Of course, the difference between you and me is I picked my wives, you probably didn't pick your bishops.

didn't pick them that's for sure! just endured them, however slow that was...! but I learned from them, what to do and not! And I have had great Bishops too!

[Alan]

When I read this portrait on deseret news I thought - "Thank goodness. It's not just me then!"