Dating Website For Mormons With Same-Sex Attraction

[Kenngo1969]

I think the vast majority of people out there probably share your views, even amongst many members of the Church.

But some of us happen to love Mormonism and all that it has to offer, and even find a measure of happiness in our faith. Shocking, I know! ...

Not just "shocking," Sky: not possible.

At least, not without an enormous amount of self-delusion.

But not to worry. Seth has come to feel perfectly at home as a member of The Humanist Borg Collective.

You, too, will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

[Sky]

With regards to the controversy over whether to use the term "gay" or "same-sex attraction", I just wanted to share with you guys a blog entry by a woman whom I have a deep amount of respect for, Laurie Campbell. At one time, she was living her life as a lesbian, and later returned to the Church and wrote a book entitled "Born that Way?" She used the pen name "Erin Eldridge" to write her book, and is now using her real name and is featured as part of the new Church website, mormonsandgays.org.

Essentially, she pointed out how the Church uses both phrases "same-sex attraction" and "our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters" on its new website, and therefore, is actually being inclusive of people on both sides of the issue.

A fascinating read and a perspective that we don't usually see, that's for sure.

[RobertAC]

Any story can benefit if you add demon zombie nazis....should go without having to say.

If you add demons, zombies, and nazis to any narrative, it's pure gold! Like the time when Goldilocks was tasting the three bowls of porridge. The demon's porridge had too much blood. The zombie's porridge had too much brains. But the NAZI's porridge was just right.

[Sethbag]

Seth,

With all due respect, despite the fact that you make it perfectly clear, above, that you think the Church of Jesus Christ and its leaders condescend to its members on the issue of same-sex attraction/homosexuality, the only condescension I see here is yours.

Ok. Btw I didn't say the church and its leaders condescend toward gay members. I think they teach them attitudes about themselves which are unhealthy and the cause of much distress. As an apostate, I don't believe the church is true, and therefor the promises gay LDS think they have from God as the reward for a life of suppression of their sexuality are hollow and without substance. That's my belief. I recognize that these guys are adults, and have their own beliefs, so I recognize they're going to do what they want, and if that means living their lives as gay LDS members, that's the way it's going to be. It may or may not result in happiness for them, just like my choices in life may or may not result in happiness for me and my family. I'm not sure where you see condescension in this, but OK, that's your view.

It kinda puts the lie to your, "Aw, shucks! Sure, the Church isn't for me, but hey, if it floats your boat, fine and dandy!" persona

I didn't know I was representing that sort of persona. My recognition that others are going to do what they want, including belief in the LDS church, is not to say that I think it's fine and dandy. It's a recognition that they're adults and they're going to exercise their freedoms to do what they want, just like I do.

Just because you can't imagine a world/circumstance in which someone might actually want to live the Gospel of Jesus Christ even if s/he has homosexual tendencies doesn't mean that no such world/circumstance exists.

But I can imagine such circumstances. It's easy: they still believe in the LDS church and the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I'll tell you what. Almost everyone on my side of the family and the majority of children on my wife's side are TBM. I don't have to imagine what people still believing in the church is like: I can just look around. Not only that, but I believed for 36 years, and I still remember what that felt like. So again, it's not very hard to believe.

Now, I believe that folks who believe this are wrong, obviously. Some people care what I think, most don't. So there it is.

And at bottom, you just can't help yourself: for all of your "Live and let live, you go your way and I'll go mine, and we'll both be happy" protestations regarding the Church, its leaders, and its members, your contempt shows through. And yes, that's exactly what it is.

I hold Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and probably some other early Mormons in contempt. I don't hold modern Mormons in contempt, unless they are contemptable people for other reasons. Just being Mormon isn't contemptable. I'm not sure where you're getting this from.

[Gillebre]

While I think that not everyone who holds an opposing view of things homosexual to the Church actually has sincerity behind what they say, I believe you are speaking out of honest belief. Thank you for being forthright about the issue and where you stand regarding it.

I want you to know that I don't consider SSA to be an affliction because my parents said so, or because the Prophet told me so, or because my Bishop or Stake President told me so.

I consider it to be a personal affliction because, through personal prayer, that is what I was told was the case for me. You wonder why I would reject these natural feelings, which without a powerful source testifying to the contrary, I would have no reason not to indulge? I reject them and choose what I believe to be a better path because I have a testimony of the Lord Jesus Christ. I know of myself, as Alma did, independent of Bishops, parents, and Prophets, that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is everything it claims to be, and is the genuine article.

When I first wrote my post before, it did come to me that my word choice would provoke a few thoughts in others, and the nature of same sex feelings as an affliction or anything else will be to the perspective of the person having such feelings. They are an affliction because they stand between me and my God, and while they would tear me down on the path to stay pure, with the Atonement having effect in my life, they help build me up. I came to a conclusion last night that I was truly thankful for all the things the Lord has seen fit to permit me to deal with in my life, SSA included. Through SSA, I have gained of necessity a real testimony of the Atonement: that it is the most powerful force in the Universe. More than all our pain, sorrow, suffering, grief, sins, and the natural man.

I appreciate deeply your concern for me, which I recognized in your post. I thank you that you do care enough to offer what you believe personally to be a better way. With all the sincerity of my heart, I want to tell you that we will have to disagree on this matter, as I'm sure you know.

It will always be my personal position on this matter, and of trials, tribulations, and temptations, that they are lastingly overcome only through the grace of God, by the power of Christ's Atonement. Same sex attractions are no exception to the universal power of His atoning sacrifice. From that truth I cannot diverge, as it has taken personal effect and I am on the path He wants for me, and I am truly happy because of the mercy, and forgiveness of Jesus Christ.

[Kemara]

I don't know if this surprises you guys.....

Knowledge gained from a long journey in the heroic struggle for truth, and freedom from the boogie man, using nothing but irrefutably sound epistemological reasoning of course.....oh and dragons. What a complete joke.

[Kenngo1969]

...Whether you choose to continue subjecting yourself to such teachings is entirely up to you. ...

“Choose to subject,” versus “choose,” period? Nope, you’re right! No condescension there!

… I'll try to say this as respectfully as I can: you guys are grown men, you know what you're doing, you've thought through this as best you can ...

Translation: You’re idiots. If you were as enlightened as I am, you’d reach a different conclusion, but, ah, well, we can’t all be brilliant! (Nope! No condescension there!)

... You learn to think of it as an affliction because people tell you that's what it is. ...

Translation: You haven’t made your own decision regarding your sexuality because it’s not the right one. You’ve simply been brainwashed all of these years by what “people [have told] you.” (Nope! No condescension there either!)

Gosh, you’re right, Seth, I don’t know where I was getting the whole condescension and contempt bit from! I guess I just need to work on my reading comprehension. That postgraduate degree didn’t do me a dang bit of good!

Edited January 18, 2013 by Kenngo1969

[Kenngo1969]

Knowledge gained from a long journey in the heroic struggle for truth, and freedom from the boogie man, using nothing but irrefutably sound epistemological reasoning of course.....oh and dragons. What a complete joke.

Now, come on, Kemara, you need rightly to characterize what Seth's heroically been in search of all of these years: It's Truth, Justice, The American Way, AND freedom from the Boogie Man!

[Sky]

Here are some profiles of real life individuals who identify as gay and Mormon. Kind of fascinating. They seem like reasonably happy, well adjusted people, grounded in their faith. And fairly typical LDS, in many respects.

Anna

David

Boyd

David

Kenny

Tyler

And some that you might relate to better, Sethbag:

Timothy

Suzi

[Scott Lloyd]

Despite Sethbag's ill-informed and ill-advised endeavor to impose an ideological connotation upon the term same sex attraction, it seems clear to me that the term has far higher communicative value than does the term homosexualtiy. The latter connotes -- perhaps incorrectly in some usages -- both feelings of attraction and the expression of that attraction. The former, on the other hand, is more specific and, without further explanation, does not automatically imply behavior. To put it another way, some people experience same sex attraction without acting on it.

If anything, the term homosexuality is more ideologically charged than the term same-sex attraction.

It prompts the question: Does Sethbag have an underlying -- perhaps latent -- motive or agenda in objecting to or expressing contempt for such precise phrasing? Is he attempting to promote the implicit denial that anyone ever experiences same sex attraction without suppressing or overcoming it? Who is being the more ideological here?

Edited January 18, 2013 by Scott Lloyd

[smac97]

Despite Sethbag's ill-informed and ill-advised endeavor to impose an ideological connotation upon the term same sex attraction, it seems clear to me that the term has far higher communicative value than does the term homosexualtiy. The latter connotes -- perhaps incorrectly in some usages -- both feelings of attraction and the expression of that attraction. The former, on the other hand, is more specific and, without further explanation, does not automatically imply behavior. To put it another way, some people experience same sex attraction without acting on it.

Yep. "SSA" more properly references the subject: feelings and actions based on those feelings.

In contrast, nouns like "homosexual" connote a state of being, preferably an immutable state, like gender or skin color or some other historically differentiated group.

If anything, the term homosexuality is more ideologically charged than the term same-sex attraction.

I prefer SSA as being more accurate.

Linguistically, "homosexual" is a bit weird in that it is a is a Greek and Latin hybrid

Thanks,

-Smac

Edited January 18, 2013 by smac97

[wenglund]

In the name of diversity and expanding the Church tent, what next....websites for married LDS looking to date other people's spouses, or LDS porn, or an LDS chapter of NAMBLA, or LDS pub and smoke shop, LDS Devil worshipers and atheists, etc?

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

[Tacenda]

In the name of diversity and expanding the Church tent, what next....websites for married LDS looking to date other people's spouses, or LDS porn, or an LDS chapter of NAMBLA, or LDS pub and smoke shop, LDS Devil worshipers and atheists, etc?

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

Or an LDS skinny dippers group. I kid you not, unlike the ones mentioned in your post. Stumbled across it one day! No, I'm not a member but many active LDS are!

[california boy]

In the name of diversity and expanding the Church tent, what next....websites for married LDS looking to date other people's spouses, or LDS porn, or an LDS chapter of NAMBLA, or LDS pub and smoke shop, LDS Devil worshipers and atheists, etc?

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

Now this I can absolutely agree with you on. Gay Mormons have no business dating anyone they might be attracted to. They are required to not even think of sharing their life with someone that they could form a romantic and helpmate relationship. If you are gay and plan to stay a member of the church, the sooner you come to grips with this concept the better off you will be. Let's not pretend that there are any other options. The whole web site is misguided.