yet another polygamy thread

[Magyar]

magyar:

in first place i would never accept doing anything that conflicts with my reasoning, logic and conciousness.....

having said that, i would definetivly not obey another human being claiming to speak for god, never....

and the god i believe in would never ask me to go to a hill and kill my son inorder to show him i love him or that i have faith in him...as a matter of fact, the idea of god asking me to do that despises me..makes me wanna throw up really.

now regarding to the thread, i must admit i didnt expect that amount of "dodging"...would it be fair to say that most of you deep in side , are ok with polygamy because its no longer practiced? (by dodging i mean hoping not to have to accept it)

and calmoriah: if you are bored with posts like this you have the option to skip it..

We're not talking about some stranger stopping you on the street and claiming to speak for God. We're talking about if you had absolute assurance somehow -- the means is unimportant -- that a command had come to you from the God of the universe, the purported fount of all wisdom, to do something un-PC, or downright bizzare.

[pssst]

We're not talking about some stranger stopping you on the street and claiming to speak for God. We're talking about if you had absolute assurance somehow -- the means is unimportant -- that a command had come to you from the God of the universe, the purported fount of all wisdom, to do something un-PC, or downright bizzare.

ok if i had total assurance that god is asking me stuff i must say : a) no god, i wont kill my son,excuse me but i love more the life of my son than my own salvation.

b- i would hate that my wife married some other gys so i wont do that to her cause i know she wont accept it.

but the final answer is:

i dont believe in a god that asks people to do un-pc stuff or down right bizarre things just to know if people love him.

[cinepro]

Is there a believer of any persuasion on this board who would admit to refusing to carry out any command of which they were sure had come from God?

While I don't know any such people personally, I understand you can find little pieces of them all over the middle east.

As to the subject at hand:

how many of you are willing to practice it?

Of the Church in general, I would suspect between 10-20% of active priesthood holders would consider it if asked by a priesthood leader. I suspect few wives would accept the idea (why should they?), but many of our single sistren would probably consider the option.

like how many are going to start looking for more wives..or are you just going to leave it to destiny (if it happens it happens)

I wouldn't be in the 10-20% mentioned above, unless she could help produce more righteous seed unto the Lord, because that's what polygamy's all about. Or if she were really hot.

and for the ladies, how many of you are willing to accept it (because i know some tbm women that say"if polygamy is back dont you dream of looking for more women!")

Based on my impressions from the internet, and occassions where the subject has come up socially, I suspect there are far more married women who object to the idea than men. Single women seem to be a little more open to the idea theoretically, but aren't thrilled with the idea when practically considered. Which is as it should be, since LDS men do have the option of marrying without their first wife knowing about it if God tells them to. So whether or not an already married woman would go along with it is irrelevant.

[Matt Andrews]

We're talking about if you had absolute assurance somehow -- the means is unimportant -- that a command had come to you from the God of the universe, the purported fount of all wisdom, to do something un-PC, or downright bizzare.

Honestly, if the God of the Universe told me to do something I thought was wrong, I would have to seriously question whether I wanted to be on that kind of God's side or not.

If God convinced me that it was right, then I'd do it. Just like if Magyar convinced me it was right, I'd do it.

But I don't think I would willfully chose obedience to a God over doing what was right.

Perhaps if He made the right threats, He/She could break my will.

It would take more than an angel with a flaming sword threatening my destruction, though.

[cinepro]

It would take more than an angel with a flaming sword threatening my destruction, though.

I agree. The only way I would be convinced by an "angel with a sword" would be if God also promised that I wouldn't be killed by an angry mob shortly thereafter as well. That being the case, I would rather have the angel do the deed. Especially if the sword looked like a lightsaber.

[katherine the great]

Based on my impressions from the internet, and occassions where the subject has come up socially, I suspect there are far more married women who object to the idea than men. Single women seem to be a little more open to the idea theoretically, but aren't thrilled with the idea when practically considered. Which is as it should be, since LDS men do have the option of marrying without their first wife knowing about it if God tells them to. So whether or not an already married woman would go along with it is irrelevant.

I know several women who I believe would be 100% fine with plural marriage were it to ever return. They are all women who do not form strong attachments though and are not particularly territorial. They are more into cooperative efforts than partnerships. I think personality factors in a lot to how well a person would handle such an arrangement.

[Calm]

I form strong attachements (and very easily too), but I'm not all that territorial, so I suppose I'm half qualified for your list.

Define cooperative efforts as opposed to partnerships as I thought they were the same thing.

I think personality and social skills and self esteem and many other things factor into comfort level with this issue (social--good at communicating especially needs, self esteem--not fearful about not being loved or looking bad in comparison to others, personality--enjoys intimacy on different levels, etc). That being said, I think there can be some negative qualities that can contribute to comfort with polygamy as well.

[katherine the great]

I form strong attachements (and very easily too), but I'm not all that territorial, so I suppose I'm half qualified for your list.

Define cooperative efforts as opposed to partnerships as I thought they were the same thing.

Partnership probably isn't the right word, but I mean two partners instead of more. I think of a co-op (coop was a freudian slip) as a group effort. I'm just referring to the particular women I know who have expressed their willingness to live in plural marriage if they were commanded--certainly not all of them.

[MorningStar]

I would practice polygamy in a heartbeat. Me and my husband's 90-year-old wives are going to get along great! (I'm picking all his other wives.)

[Calm]

I form strong attachements (and very easily too), but I'm not all that territorial, so I suppose I'm half qualified for your list. 

Define cooperative efforts as opposed to partnerships as I thought they were the same thing.

Partnership probably isn't the right word, but I mean two partners instead of more. I think of a co-op (coop was a freudian slip) as a group effort. I'm just referring to the particular women I know who have expressed their willingness to live in plural marriage if they were commanded--certainly not all of them.

I do much better on one to one than I do in groups. Hard to juggle everyone's needs and desires and skills, etc, so with that definition, I think I do much better in partnerships, but I don't mind having several of those at once with various people depending on what we are partnering for.

I see polygamy as providing a very effective way of having a very strong and deep emotional and intellectual and spiritual relationship with another woman, one reason why I feel very at home with the idea and it's even appealing to me at times, lol.

[Pahoran]

I would practice polygamy in a heartbeat.  Me and my husband's 90-year-old wives are going to get along great!    (I'm picking all his other wives.)

Nah, don't pick 90-year-olds. The cost of all those funerals in relatively quick succession will be ruinous.

Suggest you pick scrawny middle-aged old maids with sharp tongues and mean dispositions. Either that or well-heeled widows whose husbands all died rather suddenly after eating their wives' cooking. Give your husband a choice about spending his time with you!

I can joke about this because, of course, it isn't going to happen.

Regards,

Pahoran

[truth dancer]

Hi KtG....

I know several women who I believe would be 100% fine with plural marriage were it to ever return. They are all women who do not form strong attachments though and are not particularly territorial. They are more into cooperative efforts than partnerships. I think personality factors in a lot to how well a person would handle such an arrangement.

My observation is similar. I only know about 2-3 LDS women who said they would be fine with polygamy (I don't know any non-LDS). All three women were unhappily married and would perfer to be single but remain in a marriage for one reason or another.

These women all felt that if their husbands were married to other women, they would not have to engage in the relationship. Also, I know some women who just don't really care for intimacy with men (emotional or physical or spiritual), I think they would be fine with an arrangement where they didn't have to interact with a man as often.

It is pretty well acknowledged that lesbian partnerships are the most happy of all partnering options. NOT THAT WOMEN WHO WOULD LIKE POLYGAMY ARE LESBIAN, but I do wonder if there are women who just perfer to be with other women as friends rather then be intimate with a man (in all respects). If so, polygamy would be great (if women felt they are required to marry).

Also, I would question the idea that single women would be more open to it. This is NOT my observation. I do not know of any single women who would be willing to participate.

I think it is difficult for some to acknowledge that there are women who enjoy life and feel fulfilled even though they are not married.

Also, I do know men who honestly perfer being married to one woman rather than having a harem. I think these are highly evolved men who value women as something other than a sexual partner.

Just my observations...

~dancer~

[Who Knows]

I would practice polygamy in a heartbeat. Me and my husband's 90-year-old wives are going to get along great! (I'm picking all his other wives.)

So you would be opposed to, say, a 14 or 16 year old wife?

[katherine the great]

It is pretty well acknowledged that lesbian partnerships are the most happy of all partnering options. NOT THAT WOMEN WHO WOULD LIKE POLYGAMY ARE LESBIAN, but I do wonder if there are women who just perfer to be with other women as friends rather then be intimate with a man (in all respects). If so, polygamy would be great (if women felt they are required to marry).

Thanks for clarifying that. My mother in law is one of the women I mentioned and she is most definitely not a lesbian!

[truth dancer]

Hi Cal...

I see polygamy as providing a very effective way of having a very strong and deep emotional and intellectual and spiritual relationship with another woman, one reason why I feel very at home with the idea and it's even appealing to me at times, lol.

I think I am missing something...

Why does a man being married to multiple women provide a way to have a strong emotional relationships with another women? Can't one have strong relationships with women without the marriage part? Or do you think sharing a partner means you become closer?

~dancer~

[thesometimesaint]

Who Knows:

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvg/story?section=...orld&id=4145382

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

[katherine the great]

Who Knows:

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvg/story?section=...orld&id=4145382

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

Why isn't the minimum age for marriage in the U.S. simply 18? Why is it younger in any state?

[Who Knows]

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

Interesting. I wonder if my GG grandfather, who was 56 when he married a 15 year old felt the same way...

[katherine the great]

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

Interesting. I wonder if my GG grandfather, who was 56 when he married a 15 year old felt the same way...

I can't speak for your granny, but my 17 year old gggrandma didn't have anything in common with her 42 year old husband. She kept marrying younger guys until she found the right one when she was 60--then she died.

[Calm]

Hi Cal...

I see polygamy as providing a very effective way of having a very strong and deep emotional and intellectual and spiritual relationship with another woman, one reason why I feel very at home with the idea and it's even appealing to me at times, lol.

I think I am missing something...

Why does a man being married to multiple women provide a way to have a strong emotional relationships with another women? Can't one have strong relationships with women without the marriage part? Or do you think sharing a partner means you become closer?

~dancer~

Sharing anything can lead to closeness...or to contention. As can struggling toward a common goal and even just being in close contact on a daily basis with anyone can also do the same. Certain practices of polygamy can provide these types of opportunities (others do not and can even be negative at times). I am not suggesting one can't have such a relationship outside of marriage, just that it can provide depending on the people involved and their type of commitment a great opportunity within the marriage.

As is evidenced by some of the stuff I've read about how women felt about polgamy in the past, how it helped developed certain higher quality, more selfless attributes in them. Many of them came to truly love their sister wives and sacrificed greatly, but willingly for them while feeling that what they received back was well worth that sacrifice.

I see this as a positive relationship that allowed for a lot of personal and group growth if approached correctly and the good was nurtured and the negative resisted--much like any other successful relationship.

[thesometimesaint]

katherine the great:

Age of consent to marry is left up to the individual states to determine.

A side reason probably is cultural. We demand alot from our young people just to be able to be in a position to afford to marry.

[KevinG]

I'm already set up. If I become a widower, my wife's alredy left instructions on who she can tolerate amongst the single sisters. If that one gets married she picks another.

[USU78]

Who Knows:

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvg/story?section=...orld&id=4145382

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

Why isn't the minimum age for marriage in the U.S. simply 18? Why is it younger in any state?

Because people like having the option of marrying their pregnant daughters to the responsible boys.

[Moksha]

Who Knows:

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvg/story?section=...orld&id=4145382

But one of the many reasons I'm not attracted to 14/15/34/35 year old women is that they have nothing in common, experience wise, with a 54/55 year old man.

Why isn't the minimum age for marriage in the U.S. simply 18? Why is it younger in any state?

Because people like having the option of marrying their pregnant daughters to the responsible boys.

But would they be responsible parents by doing so? Same question for the kids.

What possible reason would God want there to be polygamy?

[Zakuska]

I would practice polygamy in a heartbeat.  Me and my husband's 90-year-old wives are going to get along great!    (I'm picking all his other wives.)

So you would be opposed to, say, a 14 or 16 year old wife?

I sure would. Can you imagine being married to a teenager!

My wife is older than I... I came home from my mission and found all the girls my age and younger where tooo imature. I guess I kind of grew up on my mission.