Jude2 Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 My hubby and I have a foster son who has lived with us for 14 years. He’s 34 with the mental age of 4. His mother lost custody of him when he was 7 and there is no father listed on his birth certificate. We would like to have him sealed to us, is that possible?
Garden Girl Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 My hubby and I have a foster son who has lived with us for 14 years. He’s 34 with the mental age of 4. His mother lost custody of him when he was 7 and there is no father listed on his birth certificate. We would like to have him sealed to us, is that possible? Your ward or stake should have a "Family History Consultant" called to help people with just such questions... our specialist could contact SLC for help when necessary. I'd start with your local/stake rep. GG
Silhouette Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 My hubby and I have a foster son who has lived with us for 14 years. He’s 34 with the mental age of 4. His mother lost custody of him when he was 7 and there is no father listed on his birth certificate. We would like to have him sealed to us, is that possible?I don't know for sure, but I would think you would have to legally adopt him first. 2
Calm Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 It will likely need first presidency approval, buti have heard of it being done. If the FH consultant doesn't know the bishop should have the info in volume 1 of the CHI that is not supposed to be online, but was stolen and leaked.
Tacenda Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 Possibly a derail...but has he been baptized Jude2? I heard through a podcast that they don't always baptize individuals with Down Syndrome, but with your foster child it may not apply. And this was just hearsay. Bless you and your wife for taking him in and averting a possible care center!! 1
Calm Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 (edited) It depends on the level of Down's syndrome, I believe and how significant learning disabilities are. I think a mental age of 4 makes baptism optional. I know one young man who was baptized because he desired it so much even though he likely couldn't understand the implications. I don't know his mental age though and the bishop was of the type where he let the Lord worry about the ordinance side of things, he was concerned with helping people feel they were members of the community when they had a strong desire to make that commitment but might have physical limitations. Edited November 4, 2014 by calmoriah 1
rpn Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 Adoption is required, and that may affect (probably will affect) his government benefits.
shinedown Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 The two of you are doing a great thing in caring for him. It warms my heart to know that there are truly good people out there.
Tacenda Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 (edited) It depends on the level of Down's syndrome, I believe and how significant learning disabilities are. I think a mental age of 4 makes baptism optional. I know one young man who was baptized because he desired it so much even though he likely couldn't understand the implications. I don't know his mental age though and the bishop was of the type where he let the Lord worry about the ordinance side of things, he was concerned with helping people feel they were members of the community when they had a strong desire to make that commitment but might have physical limitations.I shouldn't have brought up baptism, especially since Jude2 is only asking about sealing him to them. Which apparently is done all the time with very young children. I guess her main concern is the question about them possibly not having parental rights enough to have him sealed to them, which IMO, they definitely fit that requirement if it is needed. Edited November 5, 2014 by Tacenda
Calm Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 Adoption is required, and that may affect (probably will affect) his government benefits.Since he is an adult though not legally I assume, perhaps an exception may be made when it is reviewed by the First Presidency. I would go ahead and ask myself, make my case for it and not just assume they will stick to the general policy, but also not be upset if approval was not given, though disappointed or sure.
Jude2 Posted November 5, 2014 Author Posted November 5, 2014 Thank you everyone, our son had meningitis when he was small and then his birth mother hit in the head with a hammer, I guess she nearly killed him. He lives with seizures every day. His grandparents are dead, don’t know if they were members or not. Although a ward of the State he is his own guardian. I was told if I adopt him he might loss his benefits, but I’m not sure about that. I’ve called my Bishop and he said he would look into it for me. 1
Rain Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 (edited) Yes, good to look into. My extended family was able to seal a child to them under unusual circumstances, but it did take years and first presidency approval. Edited November 5, 2014 by Rain
cdowis Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 (edited) As mentioned before, legal adoption is necessary. Talk with the temple president -- anytime there is a live sealing, they handle the paperwork which includes a checklist of requirements. This is a fairly standard situation and no need for First Presidency approval as long as the adoption has been done. Edited November 8, 2014 by cdowis
Calm Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 (edited) Adoption is not necessary (ask your bishop to check Handbook 1 for a reference). However, sealing to a foster child where there is no adoption requires First Presidency approval and that is the case being asked. The Stake President is the one who submits the request.There is the added complication of disability which may mean he does not need to be baptized first. Again have your bishop check the Handbook, and if in doubt check with the Stake President who if in doubt can check the First Presidency about a specific case.I checked the online stolen version to make sure my memory was accurate since it has been awhile since I read the Handbook itself.Best not to take my or anyone else's word for it and go ask your bishop or stake president to check their handbook....But I am right. Edited November 8, 2014 by calmoriah
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