Do Mormons Have A Superiority Complex?

[mormonnewb]

Deleted

Edited January 29, 2014 by mormonnewb

[Ahab]

I think what we want is to not feel inferior to anyone else, or at least not anyone on this planet, so what we don't want is an inferiority complex. And so if we're not supposed to want to be superior to anyone else, either, what we should want to be is the middle of the road kind of person, properly balanced between what would be either an inferior and superior person.

And so that is what I strive to be like. Not superior, but not inferior, either. And I usually do a pretty good job of feeling like I am somewhere in the middle.

[Stone holm]

I think what we want is to not feel inferior to anyone else, or at least not anyone on this planet, so what we don't want is an inferiority complex. And so if we're not supposed to want to be superior to anyone else, either, what we should want to be is the middle of the road kind of person, properly balanced between what would be either an inferior and superior person.

And so that is what I strive to be like. Not superior, but not inferior, either. And I usually do a pretty good job of feeling like I am somewhere in the middle.

I remember a discussion with an Amishman, who was trying to explain to me that living their lifestyle did not make them superior to us English, just different. I think with anyone else including a fellow member, I would not have bought it, but in his case I did. Have a lot of respect for that colony of Amish.

[teddyaware]

http://janariess.religionnews.com/2014/01/22/tiger-mom-claims-mormons-successful/

 

Riess discusses a new book by the author of Tiger Moms, Soccer Moms (Amy Chua) where she attributes the success of several groups (including Mormons to having a superiority complex, feeling insecure and impulse control. This view is attacked by a writer in Hong Kong  http://www.scmp.com/comment/insight-opinion/article/1410156/tiger-mom-amy-chuas-frightening-new-recipe-success

 

She writes "Her cocktail for success is frightening. Students who feel they are better than everyone else can ruin a class. I've come across many such students in Hong Kong over the years and it always takes a long time to undo the damage.

One of the worst things a parent can tell a child is that he or she should automatically expect to be the best - and, yet, this is something many Asian children are told. Its impact is far-reaching; at best, a superiority complex prevents students from working hard. At worst, it prevents them seeing what's great in other people - a tragedy far worse than a low IQ."

 

Don;'t they say EQ is more important than IQ. I found it Interesting point is that they find Jews who when they are not persecuted and accepted intermarry with non-jews whereas before they did not. Perhaps that's why some interesting LDS commentators have married outside their faith

Wouldn't it be wise to define what a superiority complex actually is before attempting to answer this question? Folks can avoid the creation of an unnecessary verbal morass by defining and agreeing upon the terms of a debate before it starts. Is the following characterization of a superiority complex what the original poster had in mind when asking the original question?

"A superiority complex is a psychological disorder in which the affected individual experiences an exaggerated feeling of self-importance. He or she feels superior to other people and displays a general disregard for the thoughts of others. Individuals with a superiority complex often exhibit a sense of grandiosity. They typically maintain a feeling that they are better or more important than other people, and often fail to take the opinions or desires of others seriously. This disorder may also be referred to as narcissism or megalomania.

Traits of someone with a superiority complex include haughtiness, a lack of empathy, and a tendency to brag. Individuals with a narcissistic personality often have a difficult time maintaining close relationships. They exhibit an intense reaction to anything that is perceived as an insult. Someone with a superiority complex flatters those who give him or her admiral acknowledgment, but despise anyone who does not display admiration. The individual often claims to be an expert in a number of areas and pretends to be more than he or she is. (from wiseGeek)

[mormonnewb]

Wouldn't it be wise to define what a superiority complex actually is before attempting to answer this question? Folks can avoid the creation of an unnecessary verbal morass by defining and agreeing upon the terms of a debate before it starts. Is the following characterization of a superiority complex what the original poster had in mind when asking the original question?

"A superiority complex is a psychological disorder in which the affected individual experiences an exaggerated feeling of self-importance. He or she feels superior to other people and displays a general disregard for the thoughts of others. Individuals with a superiority complex often exhibit a sense of grandiosity. They typically maintain a feeling that they are better or more important than other people, and often fail to take the opinions or desires of others seriously. This disorder may also be referred to as narcissism or megalomania.

Traits of someone with a superiority complex include haughtiness, a lack of empathy, and a tendency to brag. Individuals with a narcissistic personality often have a difficult time maintaining close relationships. They exhibit an intense reaction to anything that is perceived as an insult. Someone with a superiority complex flatters those who give him or her admiral acknowledgment, but despise anyone who does not display admiration. The individual often claims to be an expert in a number of areas and pretends to be more than he or she is. (from wiseGeek)

Now, I can add having a superiority complex to my litany of social deficits. Thanks, Teddy!

[teddyaware]

Now, I can add having a superiority complex to my litany of social deficits. Thanks, Teddy!

I hope not! Remember, we're talking about a psychological disorder, not just quirkiness. But come to think of it, most any of the participants on this board might from time to time appear to display some of the described traits of one so afflicted -- it may just come with the territory. It could be that debaters and polemicists are usually just a wee bit cocky by nature.

[Robert F. Smith]

We laugh, but really have any of you looked at people you know and felt sorry for them?  Or felt that they are missing out?  Because they either weren't active or non members?  I have, and would think they were just wanting to have a fun time without worrying about a church or paying tithing.  I use to think this of my two sisters who aren't active.  But then I would often wonder why they were so darn happy, or so darn loving and doing wonderful things in the world.  Things for charity, donating time and money to several causes.  Then it made me think of my own happiness.  Yes, I served, but mostly in my ward or neighborhood.  And my husband and I didn't have the best relationship a lot of times, especially compared to their relationship with their husbands.  Ding, ding, ding, they can be just as happy or happier without the church.  So yes, I had a superiority complex, but no longer.  Oh, just remembered something my MIL said when she met my Catholic BIL (she is the ultimate LDS member, temple once a week, though not lately, etc.), she said to me, "he would make the best LDS member".  What's wrong with the fact that he is wonderful whatever his religion?            

Wonderful observations, Tacenda.

We all ought to keep that in mind.  There are lots of happy, healthy, and even holy people out there who are not Mormon, and who don't want to be assimilated.

However, if in the course of our friendships with non-members they happen to express interest, by all means invite them along one Sunday.  I have been in lots of other churches, synagogues, and ashrams, and enjoyed myself immensely, have good memories and lots of nice things to say about other religions.  We need to get to know our neighbors.  We need to love them for who they are, even if they don't do everything we would want them to do.

[Tacenda]

Oh, whew, glad for your post Robert. I was hoping not to sound too negative. I think the majority of LDS don't fit the real definition of SC. The opposite really, they just don't realize how some things they do or say might come off.

[ERayR]

Collectively speaking.

 

Nope just me.

[ERayR]

I think what we want is to not feel inferior to anyone else, or at least not anyone on this planet, so what we don't want is an inferiority complex. And so if we're not supposed to want to be superior to anyone else, either, what we should want to be is the middle of the road kind of person, properly balanced between what would be either an inferior and superior person.

And so that is what I strive to be like. Not superior, but not inferior, either. And I usually do a pretty good job of feeling like I am somewhere in the middle.

 

Yep very mediocre.  I don't think that is what God meant when he said "be ye therefore perfect . . .".

[ERayR]

We laugh, but really have any of you looked at people you know and felt sorry for them?  Or felt that they are missing out?  Because they either weren't active or non members?  I have, and would think they were just wanting to have a fun time without worrying about a church or paying tithing.  I use to think this of my two sisters who aren't active.  But then I would often wonder why they were so darn happy, or so darn loving and doing wonderful things in the world.  Things for charity, donating time and money to several causes.  Then it made me think of my own happiness.  Yes, I served, but mostly in my ward or neighborhood.  And my husband and I didn't have the best relationship a lot of times, especially compared to their relationship with their husbands.  Ding, ding, ding, they can be just as happy or happier without the church.  So yes, I had a superiority complex, but no longer.  Oh, just remembered something my MIL said when she met my Catholic BIL (she is the ultimate LDS member, temple once a week, though not lately, etc.), she said to me, "he would make the best LDS member".  What's wrong with the fact that he is wonderful whatever his religion?            

 

Whats wrong with admiring his talents and wishing them put to furthering the work she holds dear?  Me thinks someone is to quick to find fault where none exists.

[Ahab]

Yep very mediocre. I don't think that is what God meant when he said "be ye therefore perfect . . .".

If others are doing their best to be a better person, like I try to do, that makes us more equal than unequal. At most I just have the best information to work with while others also have access to the same information. Edited January 29, 2014 by Ahab

[ERayR]

If others are doing their best to be a better person, like I try to do, that makes us more equal than unequal. At most I just have the best information to work with while others also have access to the same information.

 

Who is talking about equality?  What I am talking about is accomplishment.  Superiority complex is about attitude not accomplishment.  To deliberately limit your accomplishments (MNSHO is a sin.  I find plenty of limiting factorsand certainly do not need self imposed ones in order to stay humble.

[Calm]

Who is talking about equality? What I am talking about is accomplishment. Superiority complex is about attitude not accomplishment. To deliberately limit your accomplishments (MNSHO is a sin. I find plenty of limiting factorsand certainly do not need self imposed ones in order to stay humble.

And if one stops wasting time and effort comparing oneself to others and insteads uses the Spirit to tell us where we lack and need to focus our growth, those accomplishments will likely happen quicker and be of more benefit to ourselves and those around us.

Edited January 29, 2014 by calmoriah

[Ahab]

And if one stops wasting time and effort comparing oneself to others and insteads uses the Spirit to tell us where we lack and need to focus our growth, those accomplishments will likely happen quicker and be of more benefit to ourselves and those around us.

Except that comparung ourselves to others helps us to see how we can improve ourselves, and how we have grown.

Like how I can see I have learned some things that some other people haven't learned (yet, hopefully), and that some others have already learned what I am only beginning to think about now. Not that more knowledge automatically makes someone a better person, but it at least helps a little.

[Calm]

Comparing specifics for reasons to help with growth...such as "this person plays piano better than I do so would be a good teacher" or "this person is healthier than I am, perhaps I could learn healthier habits from her" is different than comparing for the sole purpose of rating who is better or worse at something. There is no positive purpose served by saying "this person is better at ..... than me" or "worse than I am and so that makes me [overall] a superior/inferior person". It seems to me it is the latter that is the topic of this thread.

[djones]

Yes we do

[Yirgacheffe]

Yes we do

That's where the glow comes from.

[altersteve]

I'm too good to have a superiority complex.

 

(See what I did there? I'll be here all night, folks.)

[Calm]

You and Nehor should team up, can't figure out which would be the 'straight man' if I have the term right...got to go to sleep, brain shutting dow...... . . . . . . .

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