I need help..

[Jcurt]

I reached out to LDS over a month ago as I am in dire need of financial assistance. Mind you, I've never done this before and as such do not know the process.

I was directed to my local bishop (whom I now understand is a volunteer) and I reached out. The call was met with a very friendly and seemingly caring individual. 

I was told he understood the need and would meet with those whom would either allow of not any sort of financial assistance. I completely understood this, as I'm the one in need.

I don't want to seem ungrateful, but at this point it's been well over a month and I cannot so much as get a return call or text. I have not spam called or texted, I have been very kind and understanding.. and yet, no response even indicating a yes or no.

I post this not to be ungrateful or rude, I post this as I am in need and for some reason the Bishop will not return any sort of communication?

Would any of you happen to have any advice for me? I am in dire straights, I've never done this before and it is the only reason I reached out.. but no response still 30+ days..

Maybe I am just venting, but at this point I should probably assume it's a no, however the hotline and even the neighboring bishop said I should continue to try and contact to at least get a yes or a no response..

If anyone can provide any suggestions or insight I would really appreciate it.

Thank you for taking the time to read and God bless.

[bluebell]

Are you a member of the church?  If yes then I suggest scheduling an appointment with him through the executive secretary so you could speak with him in person.  

The information that you've provided on the exchange that you had with your bishop is a bit confusing because you said that the bishop told you that "he understood the need and would meet with those whom would either allow of not any sort of financial assistance". That doesn't make a lot of sense since the bishop is the one who makes the decisions and no one else.

He might have been saying that he would get in touch with the Elder's Quorum president to help with the process maybe?  But on financial assistance matters for the ward, the buck stops with the bishop.

Edited November 4, 2023 by bluebell

[Pyreaux]

I hear straight financial aid can be difficult and slow. They usually can quicky and easily authorize food, it should be like every week. The bishop should send someone who meets you to make a list of groceries to send off, a truck will arrive at a church every week with groceries. It can be tough if the distance is bad and you're spending money on gas, then I suggest ordering 2 weeks worth. They should sign you up to help clean the church once a week. Thats about all I know.

Edited November 4, 2023 by Pyreaux

[bluebell]

23 minutes ago, Pyreaux said:

I hear straight financial aid can be difficult and slow. They usually can quicky and easily authorize food, it should be like every week. The bishop should send someone who meets you to make a list of groceries to send off, a truck will arrive at a church every week with groceries. It can be tough if the distance is bad and you're spending money on gas, then I suggest ordering 2 weeks worth. They should sign you up to help clean the church once a week. Thats about all I know.

It kind of depends on where you live as to how food is authorized.  If you are in Utah near a bishop's storehouse then an order will be sent in and you pick it up (the process is quite streamlined since covid).  If you live somewhere where a bishop's storehouse isn't an option then usually someone from the church will go with you to shop for groceries at a grocery store or a walmart or whatever. 

I'm not sure where you'd have to live to have to wait for a truck to arrive but I believe you when you say that' show it happens sometimes.

[Jcurt]

I'm sorry if I was unclear.

I am not a current LDS member. The toll free number referred me to this bishop.

We had two very kind calls where he mentioned to me he was a volunteer bishop at the church and needed to check with the counselors to get authorization, as I was not a member.

He stated it should be no problem, as I've never requested help in the past, both from LDS or any other denomination.

The communication essentially stopped there. He has not called nor responded to texts.

As I mentioned, the toll free and neighbor Bishop stated I should continue to engage until I got either a yes or no.

I have done so, however, understanding he's a volunteer and works a regular job, I've tried to be careful as to not pester, via text or phone calls..

I guess I wish I at least had an answer. I need help bad. It seemed he may be able to help.. and now I cannot reach him nor get a return response for a month.

Thank you both for caring to respond. I very much appreciate it.

[bluebell]

4 minutes ago, Jcurt said:

I'm sorry if I was unclear.

I am not a current LDS member. The toll free number referred me to this bishop.

We had two very kind calls where he mentioned to me he was a volunteer bishop at the church and needed to check with the counselors to get authorization, as I was not a member.

He stated it should be no problem, as I've never requested help in the past, both from LDS or any other denomination.

The communication essentially stopped there. He has not called nor responded to texts.

As I mentioned, the toll free and neighbor Bishop stated I should continue to engage until I got either a yes or no.

I have done so, however, understanding he's a volunteer and works a regular job, I've tried to be careful as to not pester, via text or phone calls..

I guess I wish I at least had an answer. I need help bad. It seemed he may be able to help.. and now I cannot reach him nor get a return response for a month.

Thank you both for caring to respond. I very much appreciate it.

Ah, I see.  Yes, getting authorization for a nonmember probably goes through some other channels besides just the bishop. 

Are you transient?  I only ask because people without a home address are usually handled by a local "transient bishop".  He can either be called specifically to that position or he can be a bishop of a ward that gets assigned to help those without a home address for a specific amount of time before a different bishop takes over the responsibility.  My advice to you would be difference if you are transient than it would be if you have a home address, which is why I'm asking.

[Pyreaux]

22 minutes ago, bluebell said:

It kind of depends on where you live as to how food is authorized.  If you are in Utah near a bishop's storehouse then an order will be sent in and you pick it up (the process is quite streamlined since covid).  If you live somewhere where a bishop's storehouse isn't an option then usually someone from the church will go with you to shop for groceries at a grocery store or a walmart or whatever. 

I'm not sure where you'd have to live to have to wait for a truck to arrive but I believe you when you say that' show it happens sometimes.

Shopping is how my folks ran it in a branch in Indiana decades ago. Here In Louisiana, the Bishop's Store House is in Sydel (by New Orleans) its 3 hours away from where I am, a cold truck drops of orders at the Stake Center in Baton Rogue 1 hour away. You'd normally have to drive/or be driven there to get it.

[Calm]

1 hour ago, Jcurt said:

I'm sorry if I was unclear.

I am not a current LDS member. The toll free number referred me to this bishop.

We had two very kind calls where he mentioned to me he was a volunteer bishop at the church and needed to check with the counselors to get authorization, as I was not a member.

He stated it should be no problem, as I've never requested help in the past, both from LDS or any other denomination.

The communication essentially stopped there. He has not called nor responded to texts.

As I mentioned, the toll free and neighbor Bishop stated I should continue to engage until I got either a yes or no.

I have done so, however, understanding he's a volunteer and works a regular job, I've tried to be careful as to not pester, via text or phone calls..

I guess I wish I at least had an answer. I need help bad. It seemed he may be able to help.. and now I cannot reach him nor get a return response for a month.

Thank you both for caring to respond. I very much appreciate it.

If you are looking for help with food or reasonable transportation (like bus fare or a beater car, but not a payment on a luxury car to save someone from losing it), that is something usually easily resolved, especially if a one time thing or for a few weeks while you make connections with extended family or help through the government.  If there is something more difficult like an ongoing mortgage payment where it is unlikely someone will be able to cover it the next month, they are less likely to help immediately unless someone is willing to work extensively with them sharing financial records and such so they can help set up budgeting and maybe a job opportunity.  And they don’t help with business issues, iirc.  The welfare service is not there to help people avoid penalties or late payment fees, but to help feed and clothe them and help with shelter….but not necessarily by maintaining a lifestyle someone is used to.  I am assuming when you say dire straits, you don’t mean getting kicked out of a 5 nice bedroom home because you refuse to downsize.  Losing a job because you don’t have transportation maybe a possibility (in one case I have heard of a ward member donating an extra car for that purpose).  If you don’t have a job, they may help you find one.  I don’t believe they help with medical services, could be wrong on that.

This is a difficult time of year for bishops as they are dealing with stuff that comes with holidays and end of the year financial stuff.  If you agreed or will agree to meet any requirements asked of you, I would continue to text every couple of days or call and offer to meet with him some Sunday or other day wherever it is convenient for him that can also work for you. You should ask what records he would like you to bring to save an extra meeting.

Edited November 4, 2023 by Calm

[Pyreaux]

Every week I'd go on Sundays (like tomorrow) to church or try to call after church to get an update or call the secretary any day to schedule a meet or pass on the message. As a person with a job, Bishops usually try to conduct their business all day on Sunday, maybe appointments on Wednesday night. That is if you are worried about pestering him.

[Jcurt]

Thank you all for your responses.

To answer a few responses, no, I am not transient. I live here locally. I am married and have three children.

I do not try to burden anyone, however I do not have family nor anywhere else to turn. It is a long story I'm more than willing to share over a phone call.

I am not looking for long term assistance, I am just behind on rent and am at a loss for what to do or for whom to turn to.

I only called LDS because I didn't know where else to turn and all missionaries have been so kind to me, and LDS have always been so caring, giving and focused on outreach.

I am just trying to get a little help as I get on my feet. I do not do drugs. I do not drink. I have just fallen on very hard times.

I reached out soley because LDS seemingly care to help people in my situation. I do not know what I have done wrong. I just need a helping hand. 

Again, thank you all for your replies and caring aviut my situation, however I don't think there is a fix as this bishop is the only one who can help me.

I appreciate any and all prayers. I will pray for you all as well.

God bless you all.

[Jcurt]

I would also like to add, I have only asked for one time rent assistance. Food and a vehicle could be nice, but as I've said.. this is my first time asking anyone for help and as such don't know what could or would be available and don't want to appear ad ungrateful or "stingy".

I am just trying to keep our rental and rectify our situation, but it will take some time..

Thank you all again.

[Jcurt]

Ps. I'd go tomorrow but don't want to come across wrong. It's been a month and it seems he does not want to respond to me.

Sorry to vent or ask here. I'm just at a loss. I would not be doing so if my family was not at risk of losing our home.

Thank you all so much. 

[Tacenda]

11 hours ago, Jcurt said:

Ps. I'd go tomorrow but don't want to come across wrong. It's been a month and it seems he does not want to respond to me.

Sorry to vent or ask here. I'm just at a loss. I would not be doing so if my family was not at risk of losing our home.

Thank you all so much. 

I kind of think showing up at church wouldn't be a good idea honestly. Maybe after everyone has left for home and the bishop is still there possibly. 

Are you in Utah? I thought they had programs to help people with rent, I could look for it. Or maybe other states do as well. I'm in Utah. 

ETA: I'm sorry, I believe you have a mortgage.

Edited November 5, 2023 by Tacenda

[bluebell]

10 hours ago, Jcurt said:

Ps. I'd go tomorrow but don't want to come across wrong. It's been a month and it seems he does not want to respond to me.

Sorry to vent or ask here. I'm just at a loss. I would not be doing so if my family was not at risk of losing our home.

Thank you all so much. 

Do you know if you contacted the bishop over the boundaries where you home is in, or if it was just a random bishop's whose number you got?  If it wasn't the bishop that serves the area where your home is located, I would reach out to him specifically.  You should be able to find his information by putting your address into the map in the link below, and clicking on the ward for that residence.

https://maps.churchofjesuschrist.org/

[Tacenda]

I almost want to bet that the bishop is trying to find answers before getting back to you. Even members can struggle to get help with bills. And it depends on the bishop, all are different. Usually the bishop will want you to reach out to your family or use the government support before they'll pay bills or mortgages. They are usually able to fully help with groceries I believe, and maybe would ask you to help volunteer possibly either in storehouses, humanitarian centers etc. If you read this article maybe you'll understand better. They want people to not be dependent on someone else. https://newsroom.churchofjesuschrist.org/article/church-welfare-program-helps-people-help-themselves-during-tough-economic-times#:~:text=Although it was primarily established,commodities for those in need.

But I have no real experience, just have seen other's experiences.

[Calm]

5 hours ago, bluebell said:

Do you know if you contacted the bishop over the boundaries where you home is in, or if it was just a random bishop's whose number you got?  If it wasn't the bishop that serves the area where your home is located, I would reach out to him specifically.  You should be able to find his information by putting your address into the map in the link below, and clicking on the ward for that residence.

https://maps.churchofjesuschrist.org/

It looks like there is now a welfare hotline for bishops and stake presidents that he called and they hooked him up with the correct bishop, but I could be wrong.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/topics/welfare/leader-resources/24-hour-help-line?lang=eng

Quote

. The toll free number referred me to this bishop.

We had two very kind calls where he mentioned to me he was a volunteer bishop at the church and needed to check with the counselors to get authorization, as I was not a member.…

As I mentioned, the toll free and neighbor Bishop stated I should continue to engage until I got either a yes or no.

 

[Nevo]

It should probably be mentioned that the Church does not normally help people who are not members of the Church to pay their bills. This is addressed in the General Handbook, in section 22.5.1.4:

Quote

Assistance to Persons Who Are Not Members of the Church
Persons who are not members of the Church are usually referred to local community resources for assistance. On rare occasions, as guided by the Spirit, the bishop may assist them with fast offerings or bishops’ orders. For instance, the bishop may consider assistance for parents or caretakers who are not Church members but have one or more children who are members.

I know everyone here means well and wants to be encouraging, but we shouldn't be creating the expectation that financial assistance will be forthcoming if Jcurt can just manage to get ahold of the bishop. Most likely it will not be. 

@Jcurt, I don't know where you're located, but Tacenda is correct that many areas have programs to help folks who have fallen behind with rent payments. Another thought: have you considered creating a GoFundMe? If you were to do so, I, and perhaps some others here, would be willing to donate to that. Best wishes.

[rpn]

The bishop probably handed it off to the Relief Society and/or the Elder's Quorum Pres (depending on your gender) or to a Transient bishop (in many areas they rotate one bishop who handles all the non-member requests (RSP and EQP these days do the work to figure out whether you've accessed the local community and government help, and sought your own extended family's help, and whether it would bless your life more to teach you something rather than simply give you what you are asking for.    And he probably gave this person(s) this phone number.  

You could input your address into "meetinghouse locator" in any search engine and then go sit in the building by the bishop's office (labelled such) to catch him before or after services (or on Tuesday or Wednesday nights at 7 or after 8. 

You could also look up your community's day labor places and show up there on weekdays at 6 AM in case there are jobs, and go to the community food banks or the Salvation Army dinners that many have around the US (and sometimes the outfit that helps with rent payments.

 

[Calm]

8 minutes ago, Nevo said:

It should probably be mentioned that the Church does not normally help people who are not members of the Church to pay their bills. This is addressed in the General Handbook, in section 22.5.1.4:

I know everyone here means well and wants to be encouraging, but we shouldn't be creating the expectation that financial assistance will be forthcoming if Jcurt can just manage to get ahold of the bishop. Most likely it will not be. 

@Jcurt, I don't know where you're located, but Tacenda is correct that many areas have programs to help folks who have fallen behind with rent payments. Another thought: have you considered creating a GoFundMe? If you were to do so, I, and perhaps some others here, would be willing to donate to that. Best wishes.

The dire straits could have been food or something more immediate, rent payments are much less likely.

Jcurt, given it is rent, I hope you are not just depending on LDS help, but checking out assistance programs in your area.  Maybe they can’t help you with rent, but they could help you with other stuff that frees up money for rent.

Edited November 5, 2023 by Calm

[Jcurt]

I appreciate all of these replies.

To clear a few things up, I am not an LDS member. I also did not reach out directly in the beginning to LDS for rent assistance.

I had exhausted all options in my area for assistance and was unable to obtain financial help. That said, when I say I exhausted all options, I mean to say I reached out to any govt entity in my local and was then given several church denominations to reach out to when they were unable to help (due to exhausted grants, funding or because of my area).

I do want to make it clear, I am not upset, just at a loss as to what to do. I don't want to be a bother, but because of my area and lack of funding, no one has been able to help thus far.. and I've reached far and wide

I would also like to note, I have been doing uber eats and any and all side work I can find to try and rectify this situation on my own. After all, this is a bit of a humbling and to be honest, humiliating experience to find myself in.

Again, thank you all so much for your kind words, advice, and prayers.

I am doing my best and am just trying to keep a roof over the head of my family. I wish I never had to reach out or even make this post to begin with. I am trying.

Lastly I will say, I have a new job and between that and side work, I am starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.. I am just so far behind I worry it may be too little too late.

It is in His hands. I can only trust in Him and this point and hope a lesson is to be learned here and I will never again find myself in this dire situation.

Sorry if this seemed like a rant, I just wanted to clear some things up.

All my best,

Joshua

[Calm]

5 minutes ago, Jcurt said:

astly I will say, I have a new job and between that and side work, I am starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.. I am just so far behind I worry it may be too little too late.

I hope you can find the help you need.  It can be so difficult. I have known several families that were at the border of self sufficiency, but not quite there and it seems especially difficult for them to get assistance from government programs, when it would be such an intelligent way to approach welfare because it avoids them needing much more help in the future, saving money.

[Tacenda]

1 hour ago, Jcurt said:

I appreciate all of these replies.

To clear a few things up, I am not an LDS member. I also did not reach out directly in the beginning to LDS for rent assistance.

I had exhausted all options in my area for assistance and was unable to obtain financial help. That said, when I say I exhausted all options, I mean to say I reached out to any govt entity in my local and was then given several church denominations to reach out to when they were unable to help (due to exhausted grants, funding or because of my area).

I do want to make it clear, I am not upset, just at a loss as to what to do. I don't want to be a bother, but because of my area and lack of funding, no one has been able to help thus far.. and I've reached far and wide

I would also like to note, I have been doing uber eats and any and all side work I can find to try and rectify this situation on my own. After all, this is a bit of a humbling and to be honest, humiliating experience to find myself in.

Again, thank you all so much for your kind words, advice, and prayers.

I am doing my best and am just trying to keep a roof over the head of my family. I wish I never had to reach out or even make this post to begin with. I am trying.

Lastly I will say, I have a new job and between that and side work, I am starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak.. I am just so far behind I worry it may be too little too late.

It is in His hands. I can only trust in Him and this point and hope a lesson is to be learned here and I will never again find myself in this dire situation.

Sorry if this seemed like a rant, I just wanted to clear some things up.

All my best,

Joshua

I'd be in for helping if you set up a gofund me account. 

[Pyreaux]

2 hours ago, Tacenda said:

I'd be in for helping if you set up a gofund me account. 

I'm curious, I don't know the rules of what kinds of things a Gofund me pages are able to be set up for. Can you explain what could be done with it?

[Tacenda]

12 minutes ago, Pyreaux said:

I'm curious, I don't know the rules of what kinds of things a Gofund me pages are able to be set up for. Can you explain what could be done with it?

Anything, I just donated to my friend's daughter's father in law who they think was murdered by his other son of all people, in Texas. The gofund me was for a funeral or burial costs.

Or a lot of times it's for a family that is needing funds for helping with medical bills, which I donated to recently for a friend who's daughter has end stage cancer and the hospital bills were piling up for her and her young kids and husband.

I remember a go fund me for the gal that started the Ordain Women group, now forgot her name, she started one up for herself when she needed funds to buy a laptop, I didn't donate for that one.

So it happens.

[Jcurt]

I appreciate you all very much.

I will look into setting up a GoFundMe later today.

I will note, I have reached out to what little amount of family I have and unfortunately they are not financially able to help at this time. I really have tried to exhaust all options.

Thanks again for being so kind.