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Question On The Handbook Of Instructions


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Posted

A MFT needs a bachelors degree, masters degree, and 1500-3000 hours of supervised training to become licensed.....most bishops marital experience is from their own marriage and who knows how good that marriage is....

 

Most bishops are wonderful well meaning people, but every time my bishop counsels someone I cringe on the inside.

Why? Do you know they are doing something horribly wrong or do you just imagine they are?

Posted

Why? Do you know they are doing something horribly wrong or do you just imagine they are?

I know my bishop, I know who he meets with, and I know he is unqualified to give advice to some of the people he meets with. I keep my mouth shut for the most part but I have spoken my mind, at times and asked him to refer these individuals out or to not speak with them at all.

Posted

I know my bishop, I know who he meets with, and I know he is unqualified to give advice to some of the people he meets with. I keep my mouth shut for the most part but I have spoken my mind, at times and asked him to refer these individuals out or to not speak with them at all.

Ah, you are one of those people.

Posted

Does a bishop have the right to revelation for a couple in the ward? I don't think I ever would have thought so. Marriage counseling seems far afield of a bishop's calling and responsibility. 

 

The bishop has the right to receive inspiration and revelation for those who are under his stewardship who come to him seeking counsel.  Bishops can, and do, work with marriage counselors such as those with LDS Family Services in helping couples in their wards.

Posted

I know my bishop, I know who he meets with, and I know he is unqualified to give advice to some of the people he meets with. I keep my mouth shut for the most part but I have spoken my mind, at times and asked him to refer these individuals out or to not speak with them at all.

 

Bishops have been called by the Lord and set apart to watch over, guide, and give counsel to the members of the church in their wards. 

Posted

Would you take your Mercedes to a plumber to get the oil changed or to a dealership who specializes.

 

Bishops have no training in counseling unless that is their profession and as such do not belong in the marital counseling business. 

 

My plumber is pretty handy and drives a Mercedes himself.

Posted (edited)

Bishops have been called by the Lord and set apart to watch over, guide, and give counsel to the members of the church in their wards. 

 

And sometimes that "counsel" should be... "this is above my pay grade go see a professional."  Too often bad advice is given instead.

Edited by Zakuska
Posted

And sometimes that "counsel" should be... "this is above my pay grade go see a professional."  Too often bad advice is given instead.

THIS....

 

 

It is ok to admit when you are out of your league

Posted

The bishop has the right to receive inspiration and revelation for those who are under his stewardship who come to him seeking counsel.  Bishops can, and do, work with marriage counselors such as those with LDS Family Services in helping couples in their wards.

 

This is, again, like not studying for the test and expecting God to give you the answers on test day. 

Posted

This is, again, like not studying for the test and expecting God to give you the answers on test day. 

How?  I don't see how what you're saying applies.  I don't see how counsel from a bishop can be compared to being given answers to a test. 

Posted

How?  I don't see how what you're saying applies.  I don't see how counsel from a bishop can be compared to being given answers to a test. 

If you are not prepared God is not going to come down and with a booming voice, or even a still small one give you the right answer to someones problem (yes even if you are the bishop). This is why we have trained professionals.

Posted

This is, again, like not studying for the test and expecting God to give you the answers on test day.

No, it is not. Just like my knocking on a door on my mission and facing a tough question is not met by God demanding to know why I did not research this guy's history before I knocked and anticipated the question. Bishops face the unexpected.

Posted

If you are not prepared God is not going to come down and with a booming voice, or even a still small one give you the right answer to someones problem (yes even if you are the bishop). This is why we have trained professionals.

Because trained professionals are definitely going to impart the inspiration of heaven to you. You see, they are trained.

Posted

If you are not prepared God is not going to come down and with a booming voice, or even a still small one give you the right answer to someones problem (yes even if you are the bishop). This is why we have trained professionals.

Are you saying your bishop (or all bishops) can't receive inspiration or revelation and that is why we have professionals? 

 

As I said earlier, the counsel that a bishop can give is to seek help from a therapist. 

Posted

How?  I don't see how what you're saying applies.  I don't see how counsel from a bishop can be compared to being given answers to a test. 

 

If you're going to council people with struggling marriages or council people who are depressed, getting training in that area is equivalent to "studying for the test"

Posted

Because trained professionals are definitely going to impart the inspiration of heaven to you. You see, they are trained.

 

Likewise, a medical doctor is unlikely to give you a priesthood blessing. 

Posted

If you're going to council people with struggling marriages or council people who are depressed, getting training in that area is equivalent to "studying for the test"

 

The counsel received from a bishop can play an important role in helping these people, but I don't think anyone is saying that a church member should only go to a bishop.  A bishop has a wide variety of resources available to him to help members of his ward.

Posted

Likewise, a medical doctor is unlikely to give you a priesthood blessing. 

 

Don't be so sure.  When I was laying on a gurney in the emergency room of Denver General Hospital my home teacher came down and gave me a blessing.

Posted

Because trained professionals are definitely going to impart the inspiration of heaven to you. You see, they are trained.

Isn't the problem the fact that many people expect the bishop to impart the inspiration of heaven when they could receive that themselves. Should a bishop have greater access to inspiration than I do?

Posted

I have known marriage counselors to do the same.

One advantage many bishops may have, even if one were to discount inspiration, is that they may be familiar with a larger, longer context than a marriage counselor. They often have been able to observe directly how the couple interacts in a variety of settings, not just the artificial one of the therapy office.

 

Ironically, the one bishop I had who was a therapist/marriage counselor told ward members that he would not do marriage counseling as bishop for a number of reasons. He would refer them to LDS Family Services or a reputable counselor covered by their insurance.

Posted

Isn't the problem the fact that many people expect the bishop to impart the inspiration of heaven when they could receive that themselves. Should a bishop have greater access to inspiration than I do?

That can be a problem but some are weak or new to the faith and some are struggling to trust the answers they get and some are off the reservation and thinking their every desire is the will of heaven. In these cases it is useful to have someone else in tune working with you.

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