We are a generation that will never come back

[dannyg43]

Preparing to say goodbye

My Twilight Years at 79.


I was born of goodly parents in Miami, Oklahoma. Later family moved to Norwalk California where I went to school most of my life in Los Angeles County.. There were only 2 of us siblings, my sister Letha and myself. Because my father was in the service (1943-1945) my mother traveled also to live with him according to his desires. Therefore, my paternal Grandparents more or less raised me for two years.

Loved the old steam locomotives...I remember when the train would stop in Miami, Ok., and my Grandpa George would pickup my Aunt Mary and Uncle coming in from Joplin. I would ride with Grandpa...I was always fascinated by the locomotive...the hissing of the steam, the smoke, and the slipping of the drive wheels as they would grab traction on the rails to start moving forward again. So much different today in the world we live. Us boys would set up on the North Miami hills south of town, and watch the trains pass with Army Trucks, and Tanks during the War years. My memories of those years growing up in a small town like North Miami is a treasure to me....down on the inside, and it’s still there, and I can bring it up in a moment of time, and my old friends are right there again...faces and voices...what a gift

I was raised in Norwalk, CA during a time when most everyone treated each other with respect. We didn't eat a lot of fast food because it was considered a treat, not a food group. We drank Kool-Aid made from water that came from our kitchen sink. We ate bologna sandwiches, or even tuna (which was in a can not a pouch), PB&J & grilled cheese sandwiches, hot dogs, pot pies, but mostly homemade meals consisting of mainly meat, potatoes, vegetable, bread & butter, and homemade dessert.
We grew up during a time when we mowed lawns, pulled weeds, babysat, helped neighbors with chores to be able to earn our own money. We went outside a lot to play games, ride bikes, roller skate, run with siblings and friends & played hide and seek, basketball even dodge ball. We drank tap water from the hose outside... bottled water was unheard of.
We watched TV shows like American Bandstand, Gilligan's Island, Happy Days, The Walton's, The Dukes of Hazzard, Andy Griffith, The Brady Bunch and I Love Lucy. After school, we came home and did homework and chores before going outside or having friends over. We would ride our bikes for hours. We had to tell our parents where we were going, who we were going with, & what time we'd be back.
You LEARNED from your Mom instead of disrespecting her and treating her as if she knew absolutely nothing. What she said was LAW!! And you had better know it!!!
You had to be close enough to home to hear your Mom yelling to tell you it’s time to come home for dinner. When the street lights came on you had better be home. We ate around the dinner table and talked to each other as a family unit. In school we said the Pledge of Allegiance, we stood for the National Anthem & listened to our teachers.
We watched what we said around our elders because we knew if we DISRESPECTED any grown-up we would get our behinds whipped, it wasn't called abuse, it was called discipline! We held doors, carried groceries and gave up our seat for an older person without being asked.
You didn't hear curse words on the radio in songs or TV, and if you cursed and got caught you had a bar of soap stuck in your mouth and had to stand in the corner. “Please, and Thank you were part of our daily vocabulary!
You grew up to respect the Nation, the flag, and the President, no matter who it was.
Thankful for my childhood and will never forget where I came from & the time I came from! Wouldn't it be nice if it were possible to get back to this way of life?

I was a heart throb when I was younger. I grew up like most typical children, but under means which were not lean. I grew up having a love for muscle chassis cars, sports, Civil Air Patrol. My parents had good values and ethics, so those were also instilled in me. I married an Italian ( “Nancy Lee Madsen,” Sealed in the Idaho Falls Temple-1979) of which we had 2 wonderful children …. Serina Lee & Travis Daubin …… just as in my home. I work in the grocery industry starting out as a ‘box boy’ for Boys Markets, and progressed to Produce Manager for the Boys/Safeway/Vons Markets, and remodeling of the stores in CA. I took an extended course in Electric (Commercial & Residential in 1978-1981) of which has come in pretty handy in the many homes I have built, and afforded me other outside jobs which was a different pace from the grocery environment. Later.

I was introduced to the Mormon church and joined (1970) of which I convinced my wife to also join of which took a lot of coaxing. After 21 years of a turbulent marriage, we divorced. She became inactive and now has no interest in having any association with the church. I continue with my efforts to be an example and gentle coaxing of my children . They both are married and have blessed me with 3 Granddaughters and 2 Grandsons. Both live in California in the Los Angeles and Orange counties.
Thru the years I have had many Callings but really enjoyed the Scouting experience, serving a Public Relations Representative for the Church and 5 yrs as Chaplain (Bishop) for the LDS male prisoners at Chino State Prison where I counseled them.

I need to back up, because before all this, after my divorce I was serving as Young Men President at a Ward in Downey, California and met my beloved Carole Gibson who was Young Women’s President in same Ward. She had lost her husband in death to alcohol, and acted interested in me, and I thought she was attractive, and we finally hooked up after she initiated the first step. We finally got married. I enjoyed being Step Dad and Grandpa to her children and Grandchildren for over 18 years.

When we lived in Chino Hills, CA, we decided to downsize and get out of debt so we could go on a mission together, so sold our home and moved to Hemet, CA. We both were active in the church, sealed in the LA Temple ….. She mostly served in the Relief Society Presidency and either as Counselor or President. Several times she had health problems erupt regarding her heart and that condition was constantly being monitored and guarded.

After being in Hemet for approx. 6 mos. Joyce showed up and she and Carole had a great reunion as she was Joyce’s Visiting Teacher when they both lived in Downey, California at the same time and Joyce had taken a couple of painting classes from Carole and had developed a bonding and friendship from sharing similar marriage problems. As it turned out, Joyce had moved away before Carole losing her husband, Carole and I met & married and we moved. Here they both ended back up in the same town 6 mos. apart. Carole ended up having a stroke, and after 18 mos. of rehab defied all prognosis’ of the medical staff regarding her paralysis thru my TLC and a hired Care Giver from our Ward. Just as she become victorious in her attempts with nothing but her paralyzed arm/hand left, and was experiencing some victory with slight movement there, had a sudden heart attack and passed on much to all of our shock.

In being a friend to Carole, Joyce was there for me during my grief and bereavement offering me comfort help, etc. [all within the guidelines of her and the churches values and ethics]. Through this, we found we liked each other’s company etc., and started actual dating and then married in ‘Vegas’. Several months later after moving to Idaho, was sealed in the Mt. Timpenogos Temple, UT near where her youngest daughter and family resides. Previous to this and while in the thralls of successfully having an Estate Sale, selling my house, and moving into her home making changes and upgrades to make it suit ‘us’,

I received a revelation that we should halt all that [after putting lots of money the project], and move to Idaho ….. To Idaho Falls [or area]. Joyce kept getting feelings of Rigby [we had no church Callings to tie us, but it wouldn’t matter, because when the Lord speaks, He speaks]. Joyce states she felt we were guided here to do missionary work. We consider this calling as Family History Consultants a mission. I have succeeded in accomplishing a LOT on my personal genealogy. I inspired and guided Carole in getting hers done. Now, Joyce states I have been strongly instrumental in lighting the fire under her with her genealogy. I love genealogy!!!!! I love going to the Temple ( 14,000 of my deceased family) to do their work for them. It especially thrills me to the core when I see their spirits there in jubilee with being able to ‘move on ‘. I just LOVE it. It brings tears to my eyes every time.


Also was honored to serve in the Army branch of the U.S. Military from ’66 - ’68 as a computer operator [lucky]..
wasn’t I? ……. As this was during the VietNam ordeal]. Full Metal Jacket a move one of the best ending scenes ever made. If you remember, these Marines were American children during the post war boom of the 50s. They had their amazing, fairy tale life handed to them on a silver platter by the New Deal and the men and women of the WW2 generation. The war in Vietnam, by contrast, was a rude awakening from their American Dream of a childhood, and broke many of these servicemen. The war represents their transformation and loss of their childhood, as the Mickey Mouse club was a popular show during the Golden age of the 50's. Them singing it here, in the middle of a warzone, shows how different they have become from their youth.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmILOL55xP0

If you realize each day is a gift, you may be near my age. As I enjoy my twilight years, I am often struck by the inevitability that the party must end. There will come a clear, cold morning when there isn't any "more." No more hugs, no more special moments to celebrate together, no more phone calls just to chat.
It seems to me that one of the important things to do before that morning comes, is to let every one of your family and friends know that you care for them by finding simple ways to let them know your heartfelt beliefs and the guiding principles of your life so they can always say, "He was my friend, and I know where he stood."

Regards, Danny

 

[The Nehor]

The most spoiled generation in history sure does love to rhapsodize about how virtuous they were.

[Tacenda]

Welcome, enjoyed reading your well written background. But have to digress that I think the youth of today aren't so bad. I believe this generation are much more loving. I'm glad the parents of today aren't using corporal punishment, schools too like the "good" ole days. The other night my husband and I had some friends over and were playing games etc. And we started talking about our upbringing. My husband shared that his parents were super strict about them eating their dinner, and it was "eat it or wear it" type of deal. Well, the one brother didn't want his asparagus and his dad took it and rubbed it all over his face (that's emotional abuse). The kids would pass what they didn't like underneath the table. Or hide peas down the table leg. My husband grew up eating wheat in the mornings and jokes he'd still be eating it in 1st period or something like that. And it was like Christmas morning to be able to eat Captain Crunch or other sugar cereals at his friends' houses when having sleepovers. 

Then my husband mentioned how one day he got into a tin box of money that was used for his parents square dancing group, don't know what for, but it belonged to the whole group somehow, and he took some of it. When his dad saw him under the bed he drug him out and got the beating of his life. And they as kids were hit with a belt on occasion. Then our friend mentioned both her parents used physical discipline with her. And my husband's parents and hers were very active LDS, served a few missions, and my in-laws would go to the temple weekly. To me, whippings aren't Christlike. So I'm glad more and more, that discipline doesn't involve the physical. Recently heard a podcast with Pres Gordon B. Hinckley's niece or sister's daughter, that she was abused by both her parents growing up. And if she didn't appear perfect she'd get in trouble. So I wonder if it's a thing in the church membership, I sure hope not. 

Anyway, just wanted to respond that I'm glad that this generation, can speak up to adults, because some adults aren't good and the adults can abuse and it is generational, and if this current generation can halt it, I'm super glad. 

By the way, I went to a parade and we stood up when the veterans walked by with the flags. We crossed our hearts and showed respect. Also, I work in the schools and we say the pledge of allegiance and children still have manners, they say please and thank you. And I am probably right around your age, and grew up watching those same shows you mentioned, and I think a lot of us were stinkers and just did as we were told, and then went off and did the opposite when folks weren't watching, so it's not really that our generation was all that good, we just pretended so we didn't get a whooping. 

My husband and his brother stole CD's once from a store later on in their lives, did his beating from his dad for stealing the money under the bed stop him from stealing CD's from the store? I am embarrassed to say it was probably even before their missions or right after. 

But welcome to the board, you'll find many like minded folks here. 

Edited July 10, 2022 by Tacenda

[rodheadlee]

20 hours ago, The Nehor said:

The most spoiled generation in history sure does love to rhapsodize about how virtuous they were.

Your generation loves to tear things down can they build anything?

[The Nehor]

3 hours ago, rodheadlee said:

Your generation loves to tear things down can they build anything?

Not really a response to anything I said but I am proud of my generation which might not be the one you think.

 

 

 

 

Oh yeah, that is much better. Back to normal.

 

 

Edited July 11, 2022 by The Nehor

[Tacenda]

9 hours ago, The Nehor said:

Not really a response to anything I said but I am proud of my generation which might not be the one you think.

 

 

 

 

Oh yeah, that is much better. Back to normal.

 

 

Yes, I don't know how socialism is a bad thing. Social security, welfare, fixed roads, clean water, education, medicare, medical insurance, unemployment, medicaid, and a few others. Am I wrong, and why is socialism a bad word? Seems like it's Christlike to me.

[The Nehor]

9 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Yes, I don't know how socialism is a bad thing. Social security, welfare, fixed roads, clean water, education, medicare, medical insurance, unemployment, medicaid, and a few others. Am I wrong, and why is socialism a bad word? Seems like it's Christlike to me.

You mean all the leftover socialism from the New Deal that led to the greatest era of general economic prosperity in US history? Some of it we haven’t even gotten rid of…………YET.

[bluebell]

39 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Yes, I don't know how socialism is a bad thing. Social security, welfare, fixed roads, clean water, education, medicare, medical insurance, unemployment, medicaid, and a few others. Am I wrong, and why is socialism a bad word? Seems like it's Christlike to me.

It just depends on the type of socialism for most people.