Staged Participation, Ultimatum in Prayer, and Miracles

[nuclearfuels]

1. Then_elder Nelson,  visiting us for a stake Pres re-org suggested "staged participation" for brothers who were in medical school, law school, etc.  I agree with him. The only trick is the non-grad school brothers making up for the slack. Me doing this - making up for others slack has led to my dissatisfaction in my current ward, stake, prior wards, etc. It seems masochistic to reward oneself with dopamine when others dont do what they covenanted to do and specifically accepted callings to do.  (The duty-bound yet directionless self-mini-martyrdom of others has truly helped me see how unhealthy such beahvior is - if you have bad lungs, God might not want to help you run a marathon even if you feel that's your lifes's purpose.).  I'm trying to say no much more often and the seed is beginning to swell and possibly become a new guilty pleasure. I woudl appreciate any advice from those of you who have gone thru similar cycles.

2.  Gave God an ultimatum in prayer a few days ago - with a date and all; this is a new approach for me as I usually thank Him for blessings He hasnt' yet given me but those blessings in which I have faith He will bless me with. Sounds kind of like guilt-tripping God. That was the tactic that I used after I prayed and asked God to keep doing everything Thou wants to happen," effective results but...ya know.  This is starting to seem a bit uncomfortable - picture yourself in a marriage where God is also a spiritual partner; everything bad that happens is ok cuz its His Will; everything good that happens is due to Him and the many layers of preisthood between He and me and between He and my wife.

3. In April 2019 Priesthood Session, President Nelson promised miracles if we as brethren repented, especially in our marriages. I've tried to do that and I have thanked God for the blessings I am confident He will send in time, but in the meanwhile, if any of you could share miracles you have experienced by following the Prophet's counsel I would appreciate hearing about those.

Thank you.

[rpn]

Your Heavenly Parents and your Savior always accept personal best and quick repentance for sin.  We mortals don't have Their knowledge of each other, so it is often hard to know when to encourage and inspire and when to simply accept inadequacy to meet the needs.  We covenant to not to please our leaders with our personal balancing act, or not to meet everyone else's needs, but to seek to be what God wants us to be and do. 

I hope you find a measure of peace in your circumstances.