TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I was wondering what people think about the relationship between a man and a woman in the gospel. I always felt that men needed to be more masculine and be the bread winners, while the wives became more feminine and became the house wife. Men should lead in ALL things pertaining to finances and the wife should be fully subjected to him in all manners. I do believe the woman's opinion should be considered always, but the choice should always lie with the man. I hear a lot of LDS guys say that their wife runs the house and that they learned to just do what the woman says. It makes me sad. Masculinity has become rare. Anyone else feel the same way? Any disagree?
mercyngrace Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Hmmmm. Not touching this one with a ten foot pole.... 1
Senator Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Oh...my dear TruthSeeker24. It's been nice knowing ya. 1
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 What? Am I not allowed to post things like that? Or are you guys just joking around with me? lol I hardly ever post here so I don't know lol.
Buzzard Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I'd post a reply, but my wife might beat me up... 1
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 Haha, ok that's understandable I guess.
Saints Alive Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I have always viewed my marriage as a co-equal partnership. I preside in a sense that my name is the family name and that in formal situations I am the point of contact for all outside communication. Within the family we make all major decisions in council with each other, disagreement (which is unusual thankfully) is generally a stalemate until one or the other gives in. I don't know that it is a perfect situation but it works for us and ultimately that is what each couple must do; find what works for them.
Senator Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 and that in formal situations I am the point of contact for all outside communication. That's interesting. I've never heard that before as a gender/marital role.
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 Well, I do disagree with the stalemate scenerio until one gives in, but I do highly respect your view on it. Thanks for your input
mercyngrace Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 (edited) What? Am I not allowed to post things like that? Or are you guys just joking around with me? lol I hardly ever post here so I don't know lol.There have been a couple of threads that have been a little heated lately having to do with gender issues.This thread has land mine potential and I'm backing away slowly... lol. Edited April 10, 2012 by mercyngrace
Saints Alive Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 That's interesting. I've never heard that before as a gender/marital role. From my POV that is just a function of presiding i.e. all formal matters go through the head of the household.
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 Lol, its not my intention at all to cause a scene haha. I understand where your coming from.
Duncan Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I had a friend who is a skinflint. His wife detested that so when he was away she bought a new washer/dryer on their credit card! they are still married so I gather things worked out! balance, people, balance
Damien the Leper Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I was wondering what people think about the relationship between a man and a woman in the gospel. I always felt that men needed to be more masculine and be the bread winners, while the wives became more feminine and became the house wife. Men should lead in ALL things pertaining to finances and the wife should be fully subjected to him in all manners. I do believe the woman's opinion should be considered always, but the choice should always lie with the man. I hear a lot of LDS guys say that their wife runs the house and that they learned to just do what the woman says. It makes me sad. Masculinity has become rare. Anyone else feel the same way? Any disagree?You need to tear 1 Timothy out of your scriptures and take a year to seriously study out Romans and Galatians.
Senator Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 From my POV that is just a function of presiding i.e. all formal matters go through the head of the household.Huh......Are there others out there that share this view?(in other word, did I simply miss the memo on this one?)
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 haha, good story Duncan. I agree with equal balance between worth and value. But not in authority.
Saints Alive Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Well, I do disagree with the stalemate scenerio until one gives in, but I do highly respect your view on it. Thanks for your input my rational is that if I "put my foot down" and we are not in agreement then I have taken my wife's agency away ( especially if the matter effects both of us) and I believe that is unrighteous dominion. The stalemate is only between me and my wife, kid don't get that privilege, they generally do what they are told and like it
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 I think I agree with SaintsAlive on that, though in our world, I do acknowledge that its nearly, if not completely, impossible.
TruthSeeker24 Posted April 10, 2012 Author Posted April 10, 2012 I see where your coming from Saints Alive. In regards to the taking away agency, I like to view it as God works with us and our free agency. He allows us to choose and make mistakes, but we're still supposed to obey Him in all matters. I think husbands should be willing to let the wife do things for the sake of her own personal growth. For example, my wife likes a lot of movies that I diagree with on moral grounds. But I have never once told her she shouldn't buy or watch them because I don't want to be over bearing. I believe we need to allow people to grow, especially our wives.
Damien the Leper Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Just as Heavenly Mother isn't subservient to the Father, neither is a man's wife subservient to him. 1
wenglund Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I'd post a reply, but my wife might beat me up... ...thereby exploding the stereotypical myth of men being the only abusers. Thanks, -Wade Englund-
Deborah Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 What if the wife is better at handling finances? My ex went through 7 banks in one city because he couldn't balance a checkbook. Fortunately I had a separate account in my name for household expenses.What if the wife is better at communicating with the outside world. I have to say that is a weird one. I do workers comp claims and you won't believe how many women call on their husband's claims with the husband sitting right there because he can't communicate as well.I also wonder what the definition of being "fully subjected to" is. I don't think subjected to has a very pleasant connotation. Man and wife should be equal partners working side by side with consideration for each other's talents and strengths. If you are at all familiar with Brigham Young his wives had a lot of autonomy and he encouraged them to go to school and believed in giving them every modern convenience available at the time. He also freely granted divorces to women who were unhappy in their polygamous marriages.
wenglund Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Does the body have two heads?Thanks, -Wade Englund-
BlueDreams Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 I was wondering what people think about the relationship between a man and a woman in the gospel. I always felt that men needed to be more masculine and be the bread winners, while the wives became more feminine and became the house wife. Men should lead in ALL things pertaining to finances and the wife should be fully subjected to him in all manners. I do believe the woman's opinion should be considered always, but the choice should always lie with the man. I hear a lot of LDS guys say that their wife runs the house and that they learned to just do what the woman says. It makes me sad. Masculinity has become rare. Anyone else feel the same way? Any disagree?Nope, I don't agree. Marriage is a co-partnership. The partnership should be contextual as to what our various roles are and works best for that said couple....they're interdependent and should be flexible for what works, not strict role expectations. What is femininity/masculinity anyways? Whatever it is, most the men I know I would consider "masculine"....who knows maybe I'm biased...I like men...so it doesn't seem all that rare to me. I'm fine, though, leaving it at that.With luv,BD 1
mercyngrace Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Does the body have two heads?Thanks, -Wade Englund-oh Wade, you amuse me.
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