Staying Sexually Pure

[kolipoki09]

This past month, the LDS Church produced a video featuring young adults from six different religious denominations (they appear to be BYU students) talking about their choice to abstain from sexual relations until marriage. I was pleased that the Church was able to put something like this together with the cooperation of members of other faiths. For those who make the choice to wait, it may be a refreshing perspective.

[blueadept]

Awesome video! Too bad I can only give it one affirmative vote, I would have given it many. It was easy for me to pick out the Catholic since he showed off his 'Purity' ring. My daughters both proudly wear theirs by their own choice and not because of me and I know they both have gotten into a few arguments with their friends about why they wear it. I apparently did something right. When my oldest daughter lost her ring, she was distraught about it. I managed to replace it rather quickly. I'm proud of my younger daughter as well who will be a senior this year and has been dating a good Catholic since being a freshmen. He wanted to take the vow of being pure from the beginning. My daughter obviously obliged that request. The biggest pessimists about all of it (besides their friends) has been his parents, but I've managed to keep them from putting too much of a strangle-hold on the kids. It helps when all the parents are involved and the kids know it...

Anyways, that was an awesome video...

[kolipoki09]

I don't feel that the video overtly ostracizes those, who for whatever reason, didn't wait. I think there is more than can be done in that regard. Though the proverbial preventative medicine may prove useful for others in the future, stories of repentance, reconciliation, and forgiveness seem to hit home most for me. I hope the Church can collaborate with other denominations on future projects of this nature.

[volgadon]

I don't feel that the video overtly ostracizes those, who for whatever reason, didn't wait. I think there is more than can be done in that regard. Though the proverbial preventative medicine may prove useful for others in the future, stories of repentance, reconciliation, and forgiveness seem to hit home most for me. I hope the Church can collaborate with other denominations on future projects of this nature.

Which is why I sincerely hope that the parable of the gum is dead, dead, dead, and buried.

[volgadon]

Awesome video! Too bad I can only give it one affirmative vote, I would have given it many. It was easy for me to pick out the Catholic since he showed off his 'Purity' ring. My daughters both proudly wear theirs by their own choice and not because of me and I know they both have gotten into a few arguments with their friends about why they wear it. I apparently did something right. When my oldest daughter lost her ring, she was distraught about it. I managed to replace it rather quickly. I'm proud of my younger daughter as well who will be a senior this year and has been dating a good Catholic since being a freshmen. He wanted to take the vow of being pure from the beginning. My daughter obviously obliged that request. The biggest pessimists about all of it (besides their friends) has been his parents, but I've managed to keep them from putting too much of a strangle-hold on the kids. It helps when all the parents are involved and the kids know it...

Anyways, that was an awesome video...

Awesome family, Blueadept.

[kolipoki09]

Which is why I sincerely hope that the parable of the gum is dead, dead, dead, and buried.

Let it be buried comfortably next to the parable(s) of the licked cupcake and buttered toast.

[blueadept]

I don't feel that the video overtly ostracizes those, who for whatever reason, didn't wait. I think there is more than can be done in that regard. Though the proverbial preventative medicine may prove useful for others in the future, stories of repentance, reconciliation, and forgiveness seem to hit home most for me. I hope the Church can collaborate with other denominations on future projects of this nature.

Those that try to hang onto their wishes to 'staying sexually pure' is the group that tends to be ostracized by their peers IMHO. I'm aware of many different denominations in my community that stresses the need to stay sexually pure, but I haven't seen too many programs that takes kids from different faiths to spread the message. This is what makes this particular video awesome. It wouldn't be that difficult for local communities to produce a similiar product.

While I appreciate your thoughts that stories of repentance, reconciliation, and forgiveness seem to hit home most for many, strengthening the resolve of our children that there are other youth out there who wish to keep their virginity does exist even in today's world. The most frustrating thing that I face as a parent is dealing with other parents who seem to be waiting to pick up the pieces when their kids give into society. No one said parenting in today's world was going to be easy...

[frankenstein]

Those that try to hang onto their wishes to 'staying sexually pure' is the group that tends to be ostracized by their peers IMHO.

I have never given much credence to the "peer pressure" line. 95% of my friends in Highschool and college were were not LDS and consumed alcohol, fornicated to some degree, or smoked illegal substances of some form or another. Never, did any of those non-lds pressure me to do anything. They would "Hey you want a smoke/drink" I would say "No thanks, I don't do that" they would ask why, I would say I am LDS and don't do those things, and that was the end of the conversation.

While I appreciate your thoughts that stories of repentance, reconciliation, and forgiveness seem to hit home most for many, strengthening the resolve of our children that there are other youth out there who wish to keep their virginity does exist even in today's world. The most frustrating thing that I face as a parent is dealing with other parents who seem to be waiting to pick up the pieces when their kids give into society. No one said parenting in today's world was going to be easy.

Yes, "they are going to do it anyway so I will provide the location and the means" is not a good parenting stratagem.

[blueadept]

I have never given much credence to the "peer pressure" line.

Only LDS get to use that line so I can appreciate why you wouldn't give it much credence.

Others need to work a little harder to be respected of their religious views. This is something my kids have talked to me about.

[frankenstein]

Only LDS get to use that line so I can appreciate why you wouldn't give it much credence.

Others need to work a little harder to be respected of their religious views. This is something my kids have talked to me about.

I meant no disrepect, perhaps I should have said "I have never understand the "peer pressure line". I was of a few LDS at the highschools I went to, and in college I hung out with non-lds friends than with Lds friends. All in all, I do not understand the claim of peer pressure because I never experienced it.

[Garden Girl]

Let it be buried comfortably next to the parable(s) of the licked cupcake and buttered toast.

And don't forget the brownies...

GG

[Garden Girl]

Speaking of cooperative projects... I was pleased to note that there were young people of other faiths who attended some of the "Mormon Proms" because they appreciated the standards of behavior expected. One of the chaperones was quoted as saying he had never seen such of bunch of kids having fun in positive ways, i.e., type of music and dancing, etc.

I hope such proms will continue because obviously others enjoy them too.

GG

[bluebell]

Let it be buried comfortably next to the parable(s) of the licked cupcake and buttered toast.

I have no problem with the licked cupcake analogy as long as it ends with repentance providing a brand new cupcake.

[Jeff K.]

Only LDS get to use that line so I can appreciate why you wouldn't give it much credence.

Others need to work a little harder to be respected of their religious views. This is something my kids have talked to me about.

One of the most righteous and Christ like girls I ever knew was Catholic. She was a great example to all around her, including some of the LDS young women who themselves did give into peer pressure. It is real enough and its a shame when people don't understand it. They reject influence, even as they attempt to influence others.

[Calm]

I meant no disrepect, perhaps I should have said "I have never understand the "peer pressure line". I was of a few LDS at the highschools I went to, and in college I hung out with non-lds friends than with Lds friends. All in all, I do not understand the claim of peer pressure because I never experienced it.

It might have been different if you were a female LDS hanging out with nonLDS. I know of girls who were basically told they had no right to say no if a guy paid for their date.

[blueadept]

It might have been different if you were a female LDS hanging out with nonLDS. I know of girls who were basically told they had no right to say no if a guy paid for their date.

I agree that gender DOES play a role in this especially when there's already a difference in religion.

[Messenger]

It’s a great video and an important message so send to the world. I thought it was well done. I think the world doesn’t really know how to act any other way than how it acts now. I don’t think enough people know the absolute joy of waiting and saving yourself for the one you are married to. Its a topic that’s sacred to me, and always have been difficult for me to put into words. The only thing that comes to mind is that it's absolutely so incredibly right, that no other way, no other reasoning, no other logic, no other pleasure, can corrupt its truth: Marriage, between a man and a woman, really is of God. Anything else falls short and is simply an imitation, an act, a fake. To all those that have waited to discover its truth and found it, may you never lose it. For those that are still waiting for the right companion, strength to your journey.

[Storm Rider]

One of the most righteous and Christ like girls I ever knew was Catholic. She was a great example to all around her, including some of the LDS young women who themselves did give into peer pressure. It is real enough and its a shame when people don't understand it. They reject influence, even as they attempt to influence others.

I think John Paul II was a major influence within Catholicism to lead people to a greater understanding of the law of chastity and healthy sexual lives. I often recommend to others, regardless of religion, John Paul's Theology of the Body as explained by Christopher West. The moral standards of our Catholic brothers and sisters is often identical to those of LDS; I think it results for their desire to follow the teachings of Jesus.

An outstanding film and I hope to see more done in a similar vein.

[Jeff K.]

I like the manner in which they maintained the anonymity of the religion for each person, it adds a double message to the question of purity. Race does not define our belief system, it is conscious, like our choice, not automatic.

[Garden Girl]

I don't envy LDS parents, or any other parents, who try to raise their teenage children to be sexually pure in today's world of casual sexual relationships fueled by advertisers (buy our brand of lipstick and be sexy = popular), suggestive musical lyrics, immodest fashions, etc etc.

A number of years ago, I went to see the movie "Message in a Bottle" starring Kevin Costner... a very touching, romantic story of a widower living on the Outer Banks who would write letters to his late wife, place them in a bottle and throw them out to sea... and of a young Chicago newswoman, a single mother, who found one of the bottles washed up on a Cape Cod beach while vacationing... and how she was so touched by the letter that she just had to find the man who wrote it. Her paper published the letter, and, she managed to track him down, traveling to his coastal village where he was a shipbuilder, hoping to write his "story." There she is able to meet him but does not reveal her quest to find him nor that she was there for her newspaper... instead she finds herself falling in love with him during the few days she visited...

What a story! The problem is, the movie depicts them sailing off to a quiet beach where they laugh and play, watch the sunset in front of the fire (beautiful music playing)... and have sex.

Although nothing is shown about their physical relationship at that time, it is implied so that everyone knows. It's just understood that that was what happened.

Sitting in the theatre a few rows in front of me was an LDS family from my ward... parents with their two teenage daughters. This was a tremendously romantic tear jerker of a movie (Costner goes down while trying to rescue another family during a storm at sea), and to be frank I loved the movie... it was about everyday, small town good people... not something or someone "evil"... but the casualness of entering into a sexual relationship as if it was just the most natural course of events is just the way movies are made today... My point is, how are LDS (and other) parents who try to teach high moral standards combat such influence -- which is all around their young people all the time, telling one message while their parents try to tell them a different message.

One thing I always recommend is that parents get a copy of Jeffrey Holland's talk, "Of Signs, Symbols, and Sounding Brass" and discuss it with their children. It is one of the most reasoned explanations of why living the Law of Chastity and being sexually pure is so important, particularly for young people. It frames our doctrine so that is it not just "No, no, no" but explains how important it is.

I pray for parents all the time... that they will be wise and loving in addressing the issue of staying sexually pure.

from the beach on a lovely morning... gentle breeze... clear blue sky...

GG

[Leelee]

Whoops. I have been looking for that talk. Wondered if it is this one...Of Souls, Symbols, and Sacraments...http://www.familylifeeducation.org/gilliland/procgroup/Souls.htm

[Leelee]

Garden Girl, in searching for the talk you mentioned, I found the talk by Elder Holland that I just referenced. I appreciate so much your post because I am printing out the talk and giving a copy to all the class members this Sunday. Thank you so much. It is a beautiful talk.

Leelee

[Garden Girl]

Hello Leelee...

No, I have the title wrong... you have the correct title... that is the talk I was referring to and one I think all parents of teenagers should be aware of...

GG