The Family Song

[Jeanne]

Hi all..

Many of you may know from my posts and a previous topic here on Social about my tempestuous relationship with my father.  I believe the name of my previous thread here was "Don't Know What To Do..I Give Up" or somewhat close to that.  Anyway, this is an update that I hope will add some hope to all of us who have or will have relationship troubles due to differences in and out of the Church.  My father is extremely devout and an old timer that believes in the very fundamentals of the church ..even those that have changed somewhat.  Anyway, bear with me.  If one thinks there is not a chance in the world to bridge a gap...stay tuned.

Though I can no longer hear now, I grew up in a very musical family.  We had a family band and were asked often to sing and play at various events and parades.  Dances were mostly our thing.  Dad taught himself the mandolin at a very young age and then as the family grew..he taught us kids how to do guitar and the bass fiddle.  My sister and I took lessons on piano and so that was added too.  It is old country with some pop favorites as the years went by.  My brother and sister had beautiful voices and I would add the harmony..looking back, it was what kept us together in an otherwise disfunctional family.  We all had our favorite songs of course..some because they were easier to sing..or easier for others to dance to..but we had a family song.  This is a song where that was often requested and when it was, we knew that Dad would play the first verse..then put the mandolin down to ask Mom. grandma, or later on his grand daughters to dance.  "Somewhere My Love" was also played at all those funerals..my sister's.. my niece, my husband and Mom's.  It was just a given..you know..one of those songs. 

A month ago, after 3 years of fighting cancer, my beloved stepmother passed away.  She was a valiant one and so strong in life and her fight for it and as a devout Lutheran, strong in her faith in Bible.  Never was a time that I didn't visit where there was a piece of paper in the bible where she was reading..she loved to dance and that is how she met Dad.  In any case, her funeral was not designed to do our family song. 

Now...here is a bit of trouble...Two weeks before my my stepmother passed away, her eldest daughter decided she wanted the home..so she wanted Dad out..like immediately.  During the end month of May...my brother worked from one county while my son and I  worked from this county to find Dad a place to live.  This wasn't easy when you need medical records, Dr.s'...Insurance info and all the furniture...towels and you name it to be ready to go.  Three hours after the buriel of his second wife, Dad was on his way up to the Logan area..just three blocks from me to live.  A long day to say the least...a lot of travel..alot of things to move...and a bewildered father who used to play his mandolin for the very people who would be his neighbors now.  It was about 10:30 in the evening when in his new set up two room place...he turned on the little stereo there and proceeded to play a CD he and my brother had made a long time ago.  There were tears in his eyes...and yet he tapped his foot..bent over from his walker he lifted his head to me...and said..May I have this dance?  Somewhere My Love played on with mandolin and my brother's voice..and we waltzed..the devout mormon..and his apostate daughter...were finally in tune. 

No doubt I represented the many women that had been a part of Dad's life...and it was a last dance to the woman who had been his wife for almost 8 years...but for me..it was an inclusion..a member of a family...with  family song.

 

Edited July 17, 2017 by Jeanne

[Okrahomer]

Wonderful story, Jeanne!  Prayers for continued forgiveness and reconciliation for you and your Dad.

[Jeanne]

23 minutes ago, Okrahomer said:

Wonderful story, Jeanne!  Prayers for continued forgiveness and reconciliation for you and your Dad.

Thank you and prayers that you are soon to be at home..well and happy.  I think of you often.

[Tacenda]

Ditto what Okra said! I hope that your dad will come around before it's too late, and that you'll have a relationship that you've long hoped for. I hope his eyes are open to what he has right before him, a dear, dear daughter. Sometimes people are blinded by stupid stuff, and can't see clearly through the muck. Cheers to it being uphill from here on out.

[Jeanne]

28 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

Ditto what Okra said! I hope that your dad will come around before it's too late, and that you'll have a relationship that you've long hoped for. I hope his eyes are open to what he has right before him, a dear, dear daughter. Sometimes people are blinded by stupid stuff, and can't see clearly through the muck. Cheers to it being uphill from here on out.

Thank you Tacenda!

[Meerkat]

Beautiful story.  Dittos to what Tacenda said.  Gives hope to many of us who have had strained relationships on both sides of that divide.  Thank you.

[Jeanne]

14 hours ago, Meerkat said:

Beautiful story.  Dittos to what Tacenda said.  Gives hope to many of us who have had strained relationships on both sides of that divide.  Thank you.

Thank you so much for your comment.  This is my hope....and a waltz is a beautiful beginning.   

[Jeanne]

I bumped this up because it was time for my Apology thread to go away...

This thread is more in tune with a bridge..that one I am dancing across.

[Guest]

On July 17, 2017 at 4:19 PM, Jeanne said:

No doubt I represented the many women that had been a part of Dad's life...and it was a last dance to the woman who had been his wife for almost 8 years...but for me..it was an inclusion..a member of a family...with  family song.

Beautiful story, thank you!

Your comments reminds of a few lines from a poem I wrote long ago...

"Tho' blinded by the darkness,

The light I still can see.

Tho' deafened by the silence,

His voice still calls to me.

Give unto my thy burdens

For you this is the test,

To put thy faith in me

That I may give you rest.

From...The Path

~Lee~

 

Now, my sister Jeanne, "hear" these words. You are loved by a perfect Father in Heaven, and cherished by those you know and love you. It is so easy for those who once started out to be good parents, to get caught up "in the cares of this world" and lose their way. Which is why our Heavenly Father, is "Father to the fatherless". You and I were let down by our earthly "biological fathers", and that is our promise. It is true that a truly righteous man found my Mother and her three children (I being the youngest), who became a wonderful father. But I know the sting and the pain of rejection, be it literal, or through unkindness. I am just glad that "for a moment", you felt a part of that again. 

Your brother in Christ  Bill "Papa" Lee

 

[Jeanne]

2 minutes ago, Bill "Papa" Lee said:

Beautiful story, thank you!

Your comments reminds of a few lines from a poem I wrote long ago...

"Tho' blinded by the darkness,

The light I still can see.

Tho' deafened by the silence,

His voice still calls to me.

Give unto my thy burdens

For you this is the test,

To put thy faith in me

That I may give you rest.

From...The Path

~Lee~

 

Now, my sister Jeanne, "hear" these words. You are loved by a perfect Father in Heaven, and cherished by those you know and love you. It is so easy for those who once started out to be good parents, to get caught up "in the cares of this world" and lose their way. Which is why our Heavenly Father, is "Father to the fatherless". You and I were let down by our earthly "biological fathers", and that is our promise. It is true that a truly righteous man found my Mother and her three children (I being the youngest), who became a wonderful father. But I know the sting and the pain of rejection, be it literal, or through unkindness. I am just glad that "for a moment", you felt a part of that again. 

Your brother in Christ  Bill "Papa" Lee

 

You are a beautiful person...I needed to hear this so thank you.  So many highs and lows that when moments come like this..you remember dancing on a fathers feet and feeling you are the most important person in his world.  Thank you!  Beautiful poetry you write and I hear you.