Navidad Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 Once upon a time I moved into an LDS neighborhood. It was at the corner of dialogue and discussion street. I lived there for almost two years. I had lots of questions. At first, I was encouraged to ask questions and I felt welcome. Over time I kept on asking, sometimes the same questions because I didn’t understand. Pretty soon my neighbors seemed to get irritated. They complained because I asked questions I had asked before and they were sure their answers had been adequate. Over time I felt like they sent me mixed messages. “Please go away closer,” they told me. I got more and more confused and anxious. I couldn’t sleep. My neighbors seemed to be oblivious to what I was going through. Soon, they called me every negative epithet a Mormon could muster. I was “a son of Canaan,” a “follower of Baal,” a “fraud,” an “anti-Mormon.” What worse could a Mormon call someone? With that much hatred towards me I began to realize I could never belong. They wouldn’t let me play in their neighborhood without reminding me I was immature, not ready, obviously had ulterior motives, and they simply grew tired of me. The tireder they got, they meaner their reactions. I began to question my interest in their faith. I began to wonder why I cared about whether they cared. My interest in wanting to know more was genuine and sincere. They never accepted that. I had to move away. They seemed to be blind to how their epithets hurt me. When I pointed out that I thought they were blind to how they had made me feel, they just got madder and meaner. Oh, and I know I was not always kind and loving as Christ would have wanted me to be. I know that. But I did call my neighbors my Christian brothers and sisters. I defended them to my family and my friends. That never seemed to sink in. They never understood that it cost me to move into their neighborhood and to be their friend. They never thanked me for that. It seemed more and more to me that they just wanted to focus on their intra-neighborhood banter and their exaltation. I worried that if they were so unkind and unloving to me, a stranger in their midst, wouldn’t that have a negative impact on their exaltation chances? Oh well, that would really have gotten me into trouble had I shared that with them! Phew, my house would have gotten egged over that one! They were content with their own clique in their own neighborhood at discussion and dialogue streets. I shared with them that I needed to move away. It seemed not to bother them. They assured me they had others who had moved into their neighborhood just like me in the past, and they would have more in the future. They never even waved goodbye. I moved out. They said "good riddance" and I cried. In truth, after I moved out, I did begin to get some of my self confidence and self-respect back. I no longer felt as wounded. I felt wholer. I haven’t been struck with such mean blows since I moved out. I think I would have enjoyed living in the Mormon neighborhood; it just wasn’t meant to be. I thought I was about as faithful a non-member as a non-member can be. I was wrong. I was in the wrong neighborhood. I had questions on my mind and coffee on my counter. It just wasn’t meant to be.
ALarson Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 (edited) 29 minutes ago, Navidad said: Once upon a time I moved into an LDS neighborhood. It was at the corner of dialogue and discussion street. I lived there for almost two years. I had lots of questions. At first, I was encouraged to ask questions and I felt welcome. Over time I kept on asking, sometimes the same questions because I didn’t understand. Pretty soon my neighbors seemed to get irritated. They complained because I asked questions I had asked before and they were sure their answers had been adequate. Over time I felt like they sent me mixed messages. “Please go away closer,” they told me. I got more and more confused and anxious. I couldn’t sleep. My neighbors seemed to be oblivious to what I was going through. Soon, they called me every negative epithet a Mormon could muster. I was “a son of Canaan,” a “follower of Baal,” a “fraud,” an “anti-Mormon.” What worse could a Mormon call someone? With that much hatred towards me I began to realize I could never belong. They wouldn’t let me play in their neighborhood without reminding me I was immature, not ready, obviously had ulterior motives, and they simply grew tired of me. The tireder they got, they meaner their reactions. I began to question my interest in their faith. I began to wonder why I cared about whether they cared. My interest in wanting to know more was genuine and sincere. They never accepted that. I had to move away. They seemed to be blind to how their epithets hurt me. When I pointed out that I thought they were blind to how they had made me feel, they just got madder and meaner. Oh, and I know I was not always kind and loving as Christ would have wanted me to be. I know that. But I did call my neighbors my Christian brothers and sisters. I defended them to my family and my friends. That never seemed to sink in. They never understood that it cost me to move into their neighborhood and to be their friend. They never thanked me for that. It seemed more and more to me that they just wanted to focus on their intra-neighborhood banter and their exaltation. I worried that if they were so unkind and unloving to me, a stranger in their midst, wouldn’t that have a negative impact on their exaltation chances? Oh well, that would really have gotten me into trouble had I shared that with them! Phew, my house would have gotten egged over that one! They were content with their own clique in their own neighborhood at discussion and dialogue streets. I shared with them that I needed to move away. It seemed not to bother them. They assured me they had others who had moved into their neighborhood just like me in the past, and they would have more in the future. They never even waved goodbye. I moved out. They said "good riddance" and I cried. In truth, after I moved out, I did begin to get some of my self confidence and self-respect back. I no longer felt as wounded. I felt wholer. I haven’t been struck with such mean blows since I moved out. I think I would have enjoyed living in the Mormon neighborhood; it just wasn’t meant to be. I thought I was about as faithful a non-member as a non-member can be. I was wrong. I was in the wrong neighborhood. I had questions on my mind and coffee on my counter. It just wasn’t meant to be. Hi Navidad! This makes me sad to read. I honestly had no idea you felt this way about your experience on this forum. I sincerely always enjoyed reading your posts and loved hearing another viewpoint or perspective. I also felt you were extremely respectful with your questions and comments and your acknowledged differences (in beliefs, etc.) with members here. I admit that I didn't have a lot of interaction with you, but I do hope that I did not do anything that was offensive to you. If so, I apologize. I hope you'll still post here because we need some other voices, IMO. But if you choose to move on, I wish you the very best. You just seem like a really great guy!! Edited August 5, 2019 by ALarson 1
Kenngo1969 Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 I'm sorry for the reception you received. Oftentimes, being around here for any length of time does take a thick skin. I've not always been the best at that. On occasion, I've met fire with return fire. But I do try to remember that no one sees the world at is is, but rather as he is; that if two people are of the same opinion on absolutely everything, one of them is unnecessary, and so on. Best wishes and warm regards.
Robert F. Smith Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 46 minutes ago, Navidad said: Once upon a time I moved into an LDS neighborhood..................I began to realize I could never belong. They wouldn’t let me play in their neighborhood ............................ It seemed more and more to me that they just wanted to focus on their intra-neighborhood banter and their exaltation. I worried that if they were so unkind and unloving to me, a stranger in their midst, wouldn’t that have a negative impact on their exaltation chances? ....................They said "good riddance" and I cried. .................... I was in the wrong neighborhood. .......................... It just wasn’t meant to be. You've got us all wrong, Navidad, and the phrase "Once upon a time" is the prelude to a fairy tale. This is not an LDS neighborhood, and there is nothing monochromatic about it. The diversity here is extraordinary, and the palaver does not at all resemble what you would find in an LDS ward or branch somewhere. If your intention was to join an LDS congregation, you came to the wrong place. Participants here cover the broadest possible range of views and experience: From apostates to true blue Mormons. Maybe the rough and tumble is too much for you. I've heard that Generation Z is easily triggered. This is not an LDS neighborhood. It is a Mormon neighborhood. That makes all the difference. 1
Navidad Posted August 5, 2019 Author Posted August 5, 2019 18 minutes ago, Robert F. Smith said: You've got us all wrong, Navidad, and the phrase "Once upon a time" is the prelude to a fairy tale. This is not an LDS neighborhood, and there is nothing monochromatic about it. The diversity here is extraordinary, and the palaver does not at all resemble what you would find in an LDS ward or branch somewhere. If your intention was to join an LDS congregation, you came to the wrong place. Participants here cover the broadest possible range of views and experience: From apostates to true blue Mormons. Maybe the rough and tumble is too much for you. I've heard that Generation Z is easily triggered. This is not an LDS neighborhood. It is a Mormon neighborhood. That makes all the difference. Well, my use of the concept of the moving into the neighborhood was a literary take on the recent thread on Saints not letting their children play with non-members who move into their neighborhood. I didn't want to hijack that thread so I started a fresh one. As for being triggered as a Generation Z'er, you really make me laugh. Thanks for that. I am almost 71 years old and hardly easily triggered. Of all the people on this forum who caused me pain, you were number one. If I had to guess, I would think you are probably pretty proud of that. I was hoping that someone someday would disavow your hateful accusations towards me. That never happened. That is when I knew I had to leave. 1
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