Pornography And Lds: 25 Years From Now...

[LeSellers]

Who said anything about dishonesty. I just said don't get caught looking at porn.

Erm....

Lehi

[Jaybear]

I cannot imagine such a case. You might provide examples.

Lehi

You can learn some tips to better please your wife, sexually.

Erm....

Lehi

Perhaps its a culture thing. Are mormon husbands required to submit to a worthiness interview by their wife?

[LeSellers]

You can learn some tips to better please your wife, sexually.

Better to ask, I think, or experiment.

Perhaps its a culture thing. Are mormon [sic]husbands required to submit to a worthiness interview by their wife?

For a guy who sides with people who claim the LDS Church is hiding her history (a charge that is patently untrue), it seems odd to hear that hiding one's use of pornography is not dishonest.

Lehi

[Jaybear]

Better to ask, I think, or experiment.

For you, perhaps. But then, how would you know?

For a guy who sides with people who claim the LDS Church is hiding her history (a charge that is patently untrue), it seems odd to hear that hiding one's use of pornography is not dishonest.

If you tell your wife that are the one and only true husband on the face of the earth, yeah I suppose its hypocritical and dishonest to hide from your wife, facts that would lead suggest otherwise.

[Jeff K.]

You can learn some tips to better please your wife, sexually.

Perhaps its a culture thing. Are mormon husbands required to submit to a worthiness interview by their wife?

Such a duplicitious take on something as important and intimate as sex between a husband and wife should not be filled with a dishonest climate created by either husband or wife seeking outside sexual gratification. It isn't about Mormon culture, it is about truly loving a wife and understanding what that means. Among other things it means being open and honest with the person closest to you. It means having enough faith and love for your partner that you don't feel the need to hide and sexually gratify yourself with some outside entity. It would be a sad comment on society and the world that one had to be a "Mormon" to understand that..

Edited August 4, 2011 by Jeff K.

[LeSellers]

For you, perhaps. But then, how would you know?

I don't know (or care) how old you are, but I'm 63+, and have been married for nearly 15,000 days.

Believe me, I know.

If you tell your wife that are the one and only true husband on the face of the earth, yeah I suppose its hypocritical and dishonest to hide from your wife, facts that would lead suggest otherwise.

For her, I am.

Lehi

Edited August 4, 2011 by LeSellers

[Craig Paxton]

On a Saturday afternoon/evening in Sept/Oct. 2001 I sat in a stake priesthood leadership meeting in the St. Louis South Stake when the visiting authority, Elder White from Canada, said something like this--"There are men in this room who have a problem with pornography. In the name of Jesus Christ I tell you that the sun won't set on Tuesday night before you confess your sins to the proper priesthood authority."

No joke... It was one of the most startling things I have ever experienced in a church meeting.

So did you confess??? Everyone wants to know...

Edited August 4, 2011 by Craig Paxton

[Jaybear]

Such a duplicitious take on something as important and intimate as sex between a husband and wife should not be filled with a dishonest climate created by either husband or wife seeking outside sexual gratification. It isn't about Mormon culture, it is about truly loving a wife and understanding what that means. Among other things it means being open and honest with the person closest to you. It means having enough faith and love for your partner that you don't feel the need to hide and sexually gratify yourself with some outside entity. It would be a sad comment on society and the world that one had to be a "Mormon" to understand that..

Ahh, where would the discussion be, without Jeff's self righteous moralization.

[Jeff K.]

Having been married 26 years my goal is to always seek to be the only one true husband for my wife.

I have to wonder what other goal people have for their marriages if not that one?

[Jeff K.]

Jeff K., on 04 August 2011 - 01:48 PM, said:

Such a duplicitious take on something as important and intimate as sex between a husband and wife should not be filled with a dishonest climate created by either husband or wife seeking outside sexual gratification. It isn't about Mormon culture, it is about truly loving a wife and understanding what that means. Among other things it means being open and honest with the person closest to you. It means having enough faith and love for your partner that you don't feel the need to hide and sexually gratify yourself with some outside entity. It would be a sad comment on society and the world that one had to be a "Mormon" to understand that..

Ahh, where would the discussion be, without Jeff's self righteous moralization.

Apparently morality and righteiousness plays no part in your views? Or am I wrong to assume that you do not believe they play an integral part in real marriages?

[Skylla]

Ahh, where would the discussion be, without Jeff's self righteous moralization.

Jaybear: You're out of this thread.

Skylla

[Skylla]

So did you confess??? Everyone wants to know...

You're done too.

[scooby]

Something from the LA Times:

Human behavior: To resist temptation, forget guilt or shame and think positive

The more we anticipate public humiliation and guilt, the worse we're likely to do when it comes to self-control. If we focus on the pride that comes from good behavior, we make better choices. By far.

(based on a study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology and Advances in Consumer Research)

http://articles.latimes.com/2011/jul/10/opinion/la-oe-macinnis-selfcontrol-20110710

In other words, if you are struggling to overcome a pornography addiction, then you should avoid just about everything the Church publishes on the subject.

[Bernard Gui]

I think that porn is destructive if nothing more then loss of the spirit, mind you other things can drive away the spirit but regardless

You and I know that is true, but most people have

no idea what the Spirit is. perhaps they can understand

if you describe as the feelings of guilt, shame, violation,

loss of innocence felt during the first exposures to pornography.

That is the warning of the spirit which if ignored eventually

goes away and the user starts to feel comfortable with

offensive marterial, even to the point of denying

the warning feelings and advocating for the behavior.

Bernard

[Bernard Gui]

You can learn some tips to better please your wife, sexually.

there are better and more healthy ways to do that.

Perhaps its a culture thing. Are mormon husbands required to submit to a worthiness interview by their wife?

That's ridiculous. There are legitimate and fundamental

expectations a spouse in any kind of marriage is entitled to,

some of which are honesty, trust, and fidelity, all of which are

casualties of secret porn use by the other spouse.

Bernard

[Bernard Gui]

Something from the LA Times:

Human behavior: To resist temptation, forget guilt or shame and think positive

The more we anticipate public humiliation and guilt, the worse we're likely to do when it comes to self-control. If we focus on the pride that comes from good behavior, we make better choices. By far.

(based on a study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology and Advances in Consumer Research)

http://articles.latimes.com/2011/jul/10/opinion/la-oe-macinnis-selfcontrol-20110710

In other words, if you are struggling to overcome a pornography addiction, then you should avoid just about everything the Church publishes on the subject.

Please provide examples of wrong teachings from

current LDS publications.

Bernard

[keith_brian]

Yes. While child pornography has its advocates, not surprising considering the overall

decline of moral safeguards in our society, it is certainly one of the most vile practices

devised by conspiring men.

While most people condemn child pornography, some, like yourself, are hesitant to

admit the dangers of adult use, even in the face of continually increasing evidence

of the damage it wreaks.

My question:

Is there a time in a child's life, growing through adolescence and adulthood, that

involvement with pornography either as yiewer or producer becomes acceptable, if not beneficial? How is that date determined?

Bernard

Let's not talk about child porn for this discussion. I think everyone on this thread agrees that child porn is bad, so I see it as a non-factor -- just something to derail the discussion and act as a red herring.

If you can find one of the conversation participants that is willing to say child porn is a good thing, I would be willing to revisit the topic.

[Hestia]

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Mormon Dialogue & Discussion Board Staff