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A Thread for the Folks with grown children...Help!


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My wife and I will be turning 60 before the next year passes. We have worked all are lives and now we are retired, and on a fixed income as a result. We are not broke or destitute, but we need a car. So we are looking for what we hope will be our last vehicle. We want to buy a new vehicle that has a bumper to bumper, 10 year, 10,000 mile warranty. 

So her is the rub...we have secured the financing and have begun the search. Based on the miles we drive weekly we hope this to be our last car. But...

The children that we taught, loved, raised are all trying to tell us what to do. It has gotten so bad we do not speak of it anymore to avoid agruing. It makes us wonder how we survived until our children got old enough to tell us what to do? 

Does anyone else ever have this problem? 

Oh and what vehicle would anyone suggest??

Something that will make my kids proud. :) 

😊😎😱😂😇😴😴😴

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14 minutes ago, Pa Pa said:

My wife and I will be turning 60 before the next year passes. We have worked all are lives and now we are retired, and on a fixed income as a result. We are not broke or destitute, but we need a car. So we are looking for what we hope will be our last vehicle. We want to buy a new vehicle that has a bumper to bumper, 10 year, 10,000 mile warranty. 

So her is the rub...we have secured the financing and have begun the search. Based on the miles we drive weekly we hope this to be our last car. But...

The children that we taught, loved, raised are all trying to tell us what to do. It has gotten so bad we do not speak of it anymore to avoid agruing. It makes us wonder how we survived until our children got old enough to tell us what to do? 

Does anyone else ever have this problem? 

Oh and what vehicle would anyone suggest??

Something that will make my kids proud. :) 

😊😎😱😂😇😴😴😴

Guess what?  There are only two people you have to please and make proud....your car..you decision..you are a grown up..!:P  It sounds like you and your wife have thought it all out and have narrowed things down.  Just sit in one that is comfy...cute isn't always comfy. 

I hear you.  I have two adult children ...you know what I call them..???  Shoulda and woulda..what you shoulda done and what I woulda done..Shoulda and woulda would be moving out soon if I coulda.  Good luck with this!

Edited by Jeanne
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I always look at the consumer reports analysis.  

Remember to include ease and cost of repairs.

I would be buying one with the backup safety features, which are getting to be more commonly installed, but won't be truly common for another two -four years.  (which means if I could, I might wait another 3-7 years before choosing my last car).  (This would allow you to save and pay in cash, too.)

I would compare cost of insurance along with other costs to determine which makes sense.

Sell your current car (if your kids/grandkids want it, have them state how they are going to pay for it, and how much they want to pay for it.   Accept the highest bid if you want, or seek outside bids and then offer it at the highest bid before selling it to a stranger (though selling it to a stranger will allow you to sell it as is).

Kids can have good ideas.    When you have a decision to make, invite them to comment over a period of a few days (so every has time to think about it), and just tell them that comments submitted by email during that period will be the only comments permitted.

(Side note:  be sure the rest of your getting old paperwork is in order; if they're fighting inappropriately over your car decisions, you need to carefully think through every other decision, get it on paper, and protect yourself from their overreaching.)

 

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2 hours ago, Pa Pa said:

My wife and I will be turning 60 before the next year passes. We have worked all are lives and now we are retired, and on a fixed income as a result. We are not broke or destitute, but we need a car. So we are looking for what we hope will be our last vehicle. We want to buy a new vehicle that has a bumper to bumper, 10 year, 10,000 mile warranty. 

So her is the rub...we have secured the financing and have begun the search. Based on the miles we drive weekly we hope this to be our last car. But...

The children that we taught, loved, raised are all trying to tell us what to do. It has gotten so bad we do not speak of it anymore to avoid agruing. It makes us wonder how we survived until our children got old enough to tell us what to do? 

Does anyone else ever have this problem? 

Oh and what vehicle would anyone suggest??

Something that will make my kids proud. :) 

😊😎😱😂😇😴😴😴

Did you mean 10 year and 10,000 mile or ten year and 100,000 mile warranty? The Korean Hyundai has the best warranty right now for new cars. They have improved their reliability and quality tremendously over the years. Most car companies seem to be offering four or five year warranties.

Your best bet may be to find a dealer that offers its own extended warranty. One of my stepdaughters bought a car from a dealer here in Goldsboro, NC that offers a life time warranty on the used vehicles it sells (to the original buyers).

I don't know what your budget is, but it is hard to go wrong buying a Toyota Camry or Honda Accord. But you would probably need to purchase an extended warranty from another company to get bumper to bumper coverage for extended miles and years.

As for your children, maybe you could take a page from Andy Capp: "Of course you are entitled to your own opinions dear, I just don't want to hear them."

Good luck!!!! (On both fronts)

Glenn

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Papa,

Cars? I dunno no. I also turn sixty this year. I would suggest that you just hope for the best.  I haven't made a car payment since the kids were little. I don't believe in some great car model. 2003 Ford Focus and a '98 Toyota of some sort serve us good enough. Celica or Tercel. I get those mixed up. I know my confusion resulted in buying a battery that doesn't fit in the place provided. BUT THE CAR STARTS. For me, that is key. The Focus now starts very regularly too. I don't know why it doesn't give us the problems with starting that it did a few years ago.

Maybe like our kids, the cars grow up if we do not give up on them? God bless.

3DOP

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I,would use consumer reports car buying guide.  Pick the most reliable, safest car with descent gas mileage you can find.  Tell them (kids) you trust that. Edmunds.com is a great place to find the best price on a car.  I deal with the car salesman by using the Internet.  Don't give them your phone number.  Require them to communicate by email and eventually go drive and test models.  If u give your email out you will get a thousand phone calls.  You take the salesmans card and call them if you have more questions.

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On 6/22/2016 at 3:17 PM, Pa Pa said:

My wife and I will be turning 60 before the next year passes. We have worked all are lives and now we are retired, and on a fixed income as a result. We are not broke or destitute, but we need a car. So we are looking for what we hope will be our last vehicle. We want to buy a new vehicle that has a bumper to bumper, 10 year, 10,000 mile warranty. 

So her is the rub...we have secured the financing and have begun the search. Based on the miles we drive weekly we hope this to be our last car. But...

The children that we taught, loved, raised are all trying to tell us what to do. It has gotten so bad we do not speak of it anymore to avoid agruing. It makes us wonder how we survived until our children got old enough to tell us what to do? 

Does anyone else ever have this problem? 

Oh and what vehicle would anyone suggest??

Something that will make my kids proud. :) 

😊😎😱😂😇😴😴😴

Get the best vehicle you can afford, and want. Since you drive little look into an all electric vehicle, or at least a hybrid. As to your children tell them you having been of sound mind we spent all their inheritance. ;) 

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Do your own research and make a decision for which you and your wife are comfortable and then acquire the car without ever saying a word to your children.  

Parents do not need to earn the favor of our children or do things with this consideration in mind.  We live within our budget and we do the best we can.  

I resist including our children in these types of decisions - they have nothing to offer me unless they own a car lot and I choose to use them for the car I desire.  

Stop thinking about it and do what you think is best. 

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1 hour ago, Storm Rider said:

Do your own research and make a decision for which you and your wife are comfortable and then acquire the car without ever saying a word to your children.  

Parents do not need to earn the favor of our children or do things with this consideration in mind.  We live within our budget and we do the best we can.  

I resist including our children in these types of decisions - they have nothing to offer me unless they own a car lot and I choose to use them for the car I desire.  

Stop thinking about it and do what you think is best. 

This is what I told my wife, that we should just buy it and when they see it, it will be done. However my youngest has moved back in with his new wife of a year, because he had a wreck and a few others things happen...so they need to get back on their feet. Well he overheard and started telling us what we should do...and now all the kids know. So two of the kids I disinvited them out of the conversation and told the other two to say nothing unless it was constructive comments. 

We are taking our time on the internet shopping per one suggestion here and going by car dealers in the morning before they open. Also when we do talk to dealers we get cards and give out no phone numbers. We have already decieded not to visit any dealers where on line advertised prices are not ones on car lot. I am a big proponent of "truth in advertising". 

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1 hour ago, Pa Pa said:

This is what I told my wife, that we should just buy it and when they see it, it will be done. However my youngest has moved back in with his new wife of a year, because he had a wreck and a few others things happen...so they need to get back on their feet. Well he overheard and started telling us what we should do...and now all the kids know. So two of the kids I disinvited them out of the conversation and told the other two to say nothing unless it was constructive comments. 

We are taking our time on the internet shopping per one suggestion here and going by car dealers in the morning before they open. Also when we do talk to dealers we get cards and give out no phone numbers. We have already decieded not to visit any dealers where on line advertised prices are not ones on car lot. I am a big proponent of "truth in advertising". 

Unless we lose our faculties and are not capable of make rational decisions then there is nothing that has changed that allows children to comment on what we will or won't purchase.  I think you did properly by dis-inviting adult children from the conversation.  I can see a conversation going as, "Unless you are buying this vehicle I don't see why you want to tell us how to spend our own money.  Now, if you are saying you would like to buy a car for us, then there is nothing really to discuss.  Thank you." 

Adult children mean well, but they sometimes forget their role or attempt to assume another role that is not appropriate at the present time.  

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On ‎6‎/‎22‎/‎2016 at 4:17 PM, Pa Pa said:

My wife and I will be turning 60 before the next year passes. We have worked all are lives and now we are retired, and on a fixed income as a result. We are not broke or destitute, but we need a car. So we are looking for what we hope will be our last vehicle. We want to buy a new vehicle that has a bumper to bumper, 10 year, 10,000 mile warranty. 

So her is the rub...we have secured the financing and have begun the search. Based on the miles we drive weekly we hope this to be our last car. But...

The children that we taught, loved, raised are all trying to tell us what to do. It has gotten so bad we do not speak of it anymore to avoid agruing. It makes us wonder how we survived until our children got old enough to tell us what to do? 

Does anyone else ever have this problem? 

Oh and what vehicle would anyone suggest??

Something that will make my kids proud. :) 

😊😎😱😂😇😴😴😴

Hmmm...most new cars come with at least a 50,000 warranty and 100,000 drive train warranty on many

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A couple of things to consider. A " bumper to bumper " warranty  doesn't always mean what you think it means. Make sure it covers interior items.

When considering a particular model , go on youtube and see if there are any obvious problems that can show up. My wife bought a Honda Fit and loves it, except for one thing. The battery is so small that it doesn't hold a charge if the car is only used once a week or so. We complained to the dealership and were told to get a battery charger and always keep the car plugged in when not in use. This is a pain in the... I went on line and found that the battery problem is widespread . Had we known...

  I suggest you look into a Buick model, perhaps the smaller SUV type. The Chinese seem to really like Buick. 2 billion people can't all be wrong . LOL.

 

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