Kirsten Dunst: "you Need A Man To Be A Man"

[BCSpace]

Hollywood’s Kirsten Dunst seems to have set off a gender war among feminists after she told a Harper’s Bazaar UK writer that the concept of a knight in shining armor wasn’t a bad one — and that women and the world should allow their men to be men.

“I feel like the feminine has been a little undervalued,” she told the magazine. “We all have to get our own jobs and make our own money, but staying at home, nurturing, being the mother, cooking — it’s a valuable thing my mom created.”

Ms. Dunst, who currently stars in “Midnight Special,” has been dating actor Garrett Hedlund since January 2012.

“And sometimes, you need your knight in shining armor,” she said, US Magazine reported. “I’m sorry. You need a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman. That’s how relationships work.”

It didn’t take long for her comments to stir the feminist pot.

“Kirsten Dunst is not paid to write gender theory so it shouldn’t surprise anyone that she’s kind of dumb about it,” said Jezebel writer Erin Gloria Ryan, as reported by US Magazine.

 

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2014/apr/14/kirsten-dunst-sparks-feminist-ire-you-need-man-be-/

 

 

I take great exception to that last sentiment.  Dunst is showing a great deal of wisdom and courage to say the right thing here considering the social circles she probably runs in.  Plus, no one needs to be paid to understand 'gender theory'.

 

The connection to LDS things like say, the Proclamation on the Family should be obvious.

[Calm]

You need a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman. That’s how relationships work.”

 

I have no problem with agreeing with this.  Every person should be who they are and not be trying to be someone else.

 

The issue comes in imo on defining "what is a man" and "what is a woman" and while there are some commonalities that can be demonstrated over the group, there is still enough variation that I think it is clear that not all women need to have a shining knight and are in fact made uncomfortable and not all men fit the role either.

 

And if that is the only role one takes on, it may actually get in the way of things.  My dad is very sweet but feels the need to be doing things so he relates to people mainly in a shining knight role.  Other siblings in my family have needed him to do so, I haven't and therefore we don't have as close of a relationship as he has with others in my family.  Also he has alienated a number of his neighbours because he has (efficiently and effectively, but not diplomatically) stepped in to try and solve some problems with their HOA to the point where they are threatening legal action, calling him a liar and other nasty stuff.

 

If one sees the typical culturally defined role of man or woman as all they need to worry about in their life, than they just might end up missing out on adding significant depth to their relationships.  They should, imo, worry about being the individual they are first and foremost and then all that stuff about men and women's roles should be taken care of automatically.

[frank_jessop]

I take great exception to that last sentiment. Dunst is showing a great deal of wisdom and courage to say the right thing here considering the social circles she probably runs in. Plus, no one needs to be paid to understand 'gender theory'.

The connection to LDS things like say, the Proclamation on the Family should be obvious.

Interesting commentary from a person who is reported to be a Liberal Democrat.

[Coreyb]

The term "gender theory" makes me giggle

[The Nehor]

I never the knight in shining armor concept. Most knights had a hard time keeping their armor shiny and were generally not what we would consider ideal men (always travelling, going off and getting killed, feuding with other landholders, accidentally stabbing horses in the head while jousting......).

 

Seriously, why would you want to marry a knight?

[BCSpace]

Interesting commentary from a person who is reported to be a Liberal Democrat.

 

Yes.  There's always hope.

[cinepro]

While I might agree with what she says, I have to try and be consistent and ignore her just like I ignore celebrities who say things I disagree with.

[katherine the great]

Well, the use of the term "gender theory" is appropriate.  In sociology, gender is a social construct but it usually follows the rules of biology.  It sounds like Kirsten is just voicing her opinion about the type of relationship that works for her and I think it was tacky for the feminists to criticize her for it.  I think at least 90% of the human species fall into traditional gender categories.  She wasn't addressing the other 10%.

[thesometimesaint]

My wife was never a damsel in distress, and I've never wanted to be a knight in shining armor. The highest honors I've ever strived for are good husband and best dad.

[thesometimesaint]

Interesting commentary from a person who is reported to be a Liberal Democrat.

 

I feel sorry for your wife and daughters that you consider them second class citizens simply because of their sex.

[The Nehor]

I think the question is why a woman cannot be more like a man? Someone should really write a song about that.

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

I take great exception to that last sentiment.  Dunst is showing a great deal of wisdom and courage to say the right thing here considering the social circles she probably runs in.  Plus, no one needs to be paid to understand 'gender theory'.

 

The connection to LDS things like say, the Proclamation on the Family should be obvious.

We indeed live in a world, where good is called evil, and that which is evil is called good. Only problem is we were and are warned, when we in these days...the end cometh soon.

[Nofear]

I think the question is why a woman cannot be more like a man? Someone should really write a song about that.

 

 

[Avatar4321]

She's absolutely right.

[thesometimesaint]

So a hero is a man who rides a mighty white steed, uses a gun, and a whip to rescue fair damsels in distress.  Nice fairy tale dream, but it long past time to wake up and smell the hot chocolate.

[ERayR]

I feel sorry for your wife and daughters that you consider them second class citizens simply because of their sex.

Where did you get that from what he wrote?

[thesometimesaint]

Where did you get that from what he wrote?

 

Maybe I was too persnickety. "But Hollywood’s Kirsten Dunst seems to have set off a gender war among feminists after she told a Harper’s Bazaar UK writer that the concept of a knight in shining armor wasn’t a bad one — and that women and the world should allow their men to be men".

 

Knights in shinning armor rescuing fair damsels in distress is a nice fairy tale. However in real life knights were real jerks, and damsels in distress weren't. To agree with Miss Dunst, Liberal or not, calls into question his own ideas about men and women.

[ERayR]

Maybe I was too persnickety. "But Hollywood’s Kirsten Dunst seems to have set off a gender war among feminists after she told a Harper’s Bazaar UK writer that the concept of a knight in shining armor wasn’t a bad one — and that women and the world should allow their men to be men".

 

Knights in shinning armor rescuing fair damsels in distress is a nice fairy tale. However in real life knights were real jerks, and damsels in distress weren't. To agree with Miss Dunst, Liberal or not, calls into question his own ideas about men and women.

I still ask where do get that frank_jessop's considers his wife and children second class citizens. You do have a tendency to go over the top with your exaggerations.

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

 

Where have all the good men gone...they are good husbands, good fathers, going quietly about there business of changing the world one life at a time. Like the father who married my mother after her husband had abandoned her and his three children, who took us in and gave my mother, my sister, my brother and myself his name. Where have the good men gone...my father Albert H Lee, June 6, 2005, whom my mother join forever three weeks ago. The same man who taught me to adopt my oldest and give her his name as well. When men like these are gone, we all soon will follow.

[thesometimesaint]

I still ask where do get that frank_jessop's considers his wife and children second class citizens. You do have a tendency to go over the top with your exaggerations.

 

Women and girls in the age knights in shining armor were second class citizens. Holding up that as an ideal for your own family in the 21st Century is rather bizarre.

[ERayR]

Women and girls in the age knights in shining armor were second class citizens. Holding up that as an ideal for your own family in the 21st Century is rather bizarre.

I really wish I had your powers of clairvoyance.

[Judd]

Women and girls in the age knights in shining armor were second class citizens. Holding up that as an ideal for your own family in the 21st Century is rather bizarre.

So in our 21st century culture, is the phrase 'knight in shining armor' assumed to be taken as a literal and historical analog, or is it employed more metaphorically, generally speaking?

[thesometimesaint]

So in our 21st century culture, is the phrase 'knight in shining armor' assumed to be taken as a literal and historical analog, or is it employed more metaphorically, generally speaking?

 

It's bit of both. We have an overly romanticized ideal of our past. Strong brave knight in shinning armor, rescues fair damsel in distress. Have lavish wedding, live happily ever after in a castle. Nice fairytale, but reality just doesn't work that way.

[The Nehor]

It's bit of both. We have an overly romanticized ideal of our past. Strong brave knight in shinning armor, rescues fair damsel in distress. Have lavish wedding, live happily ever after in a castle. Nice fairytale, but reality just doesn't work that way.

Yeah, the lack of indoor plumbing really ruins most of history.

[Stargazer]

I had never seen that music video of "Man! I feel like a woman!"  Obviously a deliberate attempt to duplicate Robert Palmer's "Addicted to Love" music video, and pretty effective, I think.  Except that the women in Palmer's video moved better, while the men in Twain's seemed to play their instruments better.

 

And as to the topic at hand, my wife has told me many times that she wanted a husband would take leadership and be decisive.