Can Someone Explain This To Me?

[EllenMaksoud]

So, I have seen a thing that has changed me.

 

I notice that when someone shares bad news, there are certain people who get really emotional, over the top emotional, and then it is all about them. Are they simply failing to deal with their own stuff and are unable to share their own pain rationally?  The worst part is that the original one who shared the painful news gets nothing.

[The Nehor]

Some people suck at sympathy:

 

[rpn]

Some people personalize everything.  Others think they are the center of the world (these are those who try to top every story that someone else tells).   Some people don't know how to do sympathy or empathy or even how to listen.   Smart people figure out whether another will respond in ways that are helpful to them, and if they aren't don't share much of themselves with them again.

[Tacenda]

Some people personalize everything. Others think they are the center of the world (these are those who try to top every story that someone else tells). Some people don't know how to do sympathy or empathy or even how to listen. Smart people figure out whether another will respond in ways that are helpful to them, and if they aren't don't share much of themselves with them again.

My computer is still inoperable, a Dell tech is coming tomorrow, yay! When it's fixed, I hope to be able to find and link you to a wonderful article written on how to have empathy, not just sympathy, it's awesome. I even used it for a VT lesson not too long ago. Maybe I'll try to find it and type the URL here anyway.

[Calm]

So, I have seen a thing that has changed me.

 

I notice that when someone shares bad news, there are certain people who get really emotional, over the top emotional, and then it is all about them. Are they simply failing to deal with their own stuff and are unable to share their own pain rationally?  The worst part is that the original one who shared the painful news gets nothing.

I agree this is a difficult and uncomfortable situation when it happens.  I am wondering though why it would have changed you? 

 

When this happens, I think probably the best thing to do may be to simply ignore the person attempting to manipulate the situation to shift the attention to them and remain focused on the person with the immediate need.  If you were the unfortunate individual who was the sharer of the bad news, I hope that you find someone more trustworthy and less selfcentered to confide in...at least you know who not to take your pain to next time.

[thesometimesaint]

So, I have seen a thing that has changed me.

 

I notice that when someone shares bad news, there are certain people who get really emotional, over the top emotional, and then it is all about them. Are they simply failing to deal with their own stuff and are unable to share their own pain rationally?  The worst part is that the original one who shared the painful news gets nothing.

 

It might be frustrating but we all deal with bad news differently. Just accept their grief and move on. You could also prioritize how much of and to whom you tell bad news to.

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

It might be frustrating but we all deal with bad news differently. Just accept their grief and move on. You could also prioritize how much of and to whom you tell bad news to.

TSS, I live in EST, I believe you are many hours behind me...hope you are not having trouble sleeping...I hate that.

[thesometimesaint]

One of those nights where I sleep for a few hours than I'm just AWAKE. I'll probable take a short nap later today.

[Tacenda]

One of those nights where I sleep for a few hours than I'm just AWAKE. I'll probable take a short nap later today.

Is it our age? I do that too! And envy the youth who can sleep 12 hours straight if given the chance!

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

So, I have seen a thing that has changed me.

 

I notice that when someone shares bad news, there are certain people who get really emotional, over the top emotional, and then it is all about them. Are they simply failing to deal with their own stuff and are unable to share their own pain rationally?  The worst part is that the original one who shared the painful news gets nothing.

There are people who need everything to be about them, even if something happened in the past they seek to tell how it effected them. Some past things can, but I have known people who felt this away about things that did not involve their history at all. As the Psalmist said, "Vanity, vanity, all is vanity".

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

One of those nights where I sleep for a few hours than I'm just AWAKE. I'll probable take a short nap later today.

You know the Bible speaks of this as something that comes with age...I do the same many nights, but never nap. Sometimes I stay up for two days without sleep...not by choice.