Resuming Church Attendence

[Daniel2]

Well... this may come as a shock to some, but I just thought I'd take a personal moment to share that I've started attending LDS services on alternating Sundays to be supportive of my kids' activeness in the church.

It's an interesting place, to be in, attending as a non-believer, in order to encourage my children's belief.

While they're in Primary and Young Women's, I decided to attend Gospel Doctrine and EQ on my own, just so people in the ward don't wonder who the heck I am all the time, and so they know of my support for the kids' issues. I've enjoyed listening and even chiming in with my (constructively LDS) two cents, a couple of times.

Many of you know me as someone who disagrees with the church over it's stance on certain issues--but I'm reminded of all the things I admire about the LDS people and their inherent good qualities, as I've started attending. I also LOVE singing the familiar hymns of my childhood.

Daniel2

Edited November 3, 2011 by Daniel2

[bluebell]

You're a good dad.

[rpn]

Good for you.

[Libs]

That's wonderful, Daniel. There is most certainly a lot of good in the church and I'm sure your children will reap huge benefits from your support.

I see that you are a UU gay dad. Do the children ever attend your church? Or just strictly LDS?

[Duncan]

That's awesome!!!

[kolipoki09]

To respectfully sit in on and even loosely participate in church meetings to support your family is admirable, even if you disagree with what is being taught. I think that's a rather brave thing to do, and I'm not sure I'd have the courage to do it.

I've attended non-LDS meetings with family members out of respect for them as individuals, not out of any allegiance to the group as a whole. I suspect you're in a similar situation in your case. If it helps your family establish some sort of conception of "good," I'm very happy for you. I just hope for your sake that you're not too pressured by others. If this is truly out of "your own free will and choice," kudos to you my friend.

[Garden Girl]

Hello Daniel2...

I encourage you to continue to attend and be supportive of your children... yes, you are a good dad that's for sure. I hope you'll feel more comfortable the more you attend.

GG

[TAO]

Good job, Daniel, that's very good of you for your kids! Yeah, my dad isn't a member either, but it feels much better when he comes... more complete and all. And yeah, the hymns are awesome!

*I guess I have a weakness for music =P*

[thesometimesaint]

[Bill “Papa” Lee]

Well... this may come as a shock to some, but I just thought I'd take a personal moment to share that I've started attending LDS services on alternating Sundays to be supportive of my kids' activeness in the church.

It's an interesting place, to be in, attending as a non-believer, in order to encourage my children's belief.

While they're in Primary and Young Women's, I decided to attend Gospel Doctrine and EQ on my own, just so people in the ward don't wonder who the heck I am all the time, and so they know of my support for the kids' issues. I've enjoyed listening and even chiming in with my (constructively LDS) two cents, a couple of times.

Many of you know me as someone who disagrees with the church over it's stance on certain issues--but I'm reminded of all the things I admire about the LDS people and their inherent good qualities, as I've started attending. I also LOVE singing the familiar hymns of my childhood.

Daniel2

Too whom do you refer them if they have questions about God or Faith?

[Daniel2]

Thanks for your encouragement, everyone.

That's wonderful, Daniel. There is most certainly a lot of good in the church and I'm sure your children will reap huge benefits from your support.

I see that you are a UU gay dad. Do the children ever attend your church? Or just strictly LDS?

Our kids are aware that I am a member of another Faith. I've never taken my kids to the UU church. The divorce of their mother and I has been hard enough as it is. I don't feel the need to introduce further instability in their lives concerning who God is. There may come a day when they begin that search on their own. I feel it's important to support them in their spiritual journey just where they are.

Daniel2

Edited November 4, 2011 by Daniel2

[Daniel2]

To respectfully sit in on and even loosely participate in church meetings to support your family is admirable, even if you disagree with what is being taught. I think that's a rather brave thing to do, and I'm not sure I'd have the courage to do it.

I've attended non-LDS meetings with family members out of respect for them as individuals, not out of any allegiance to the group as a whole. I suspect you're in a similar situation in your case. If it helps your family establish some sort of conception of "good," I'm very happy for you. I just hope for your sake that you're not too pressured by others. If this is truly out of "your own free will and choice," kudos to you my friend.

Thanks for the kind words, Kolipoki. There really hasn't been any pressure for me to attend or participate--it's really a decision I've arrived at to support my kids.

Daniel2

[Daniel2]

Too whom do you refer them if they have questions about God or Faith?

Honestly, they rarely ask me questions... But I answer their questions by giving answers that most Latter-day Saints would give, while vaguely avoiding suggestion that I necessary share those beliefs. In other words, I don't try to give them a false impression that I believe, but I strive to avoid giving them any explanation that might damage or be construed to be an attack on their belief, either.

When they've asked questions about Jesus, for example, rather than say, "Well, we (or I) believe that Jesus...." I'll say, "Well, the New Testament (or Joseph Smith or the Book of Mormon) teaches that Jesus..."

When the kids and I are at home together, I continue their same religious practices in my home, as well (we say the blessing over every meal, I have pictures of Christ in each of their bedrooms, and I got Young Women's Values posters for my daughter's room).

The most challenging question was when the kids asked me if I "believe" in Jesus. My response was, "I really love many of Jesus's teachings, especially about loving and serving one another. I know we can each become better people when we strive to be full of the kind of love that he taught about."

Daniel2

[Libs]

Thanks for your encouragement, everyone.

Our kids are aware that I am a member of another Faith. I've never taken my kids to the UU church. The divorce of their mother and I has been hard enough as it is. I don't feel the need to introduce further instability in their lives concerning who God is. There may come a day when they begin that search on their own. I feel it's important to support them in their spiritual journey just where they are.

Daniel2

Thanks for the response, Daniel. Very wise decision, IMO.

[ERayR]

Thanks for your encouragement, everyone.

Our kids are aware that I am a member of another Faith. I've never taken my kids to the UU church. The divorce of their mother and I has been hard enough as it is. I don't feel the need to introduce further instability in their lives concerning who God is. There may come a day when they begin that search on their own. I feel it's important to support them in their spiritual journey just where they are.

Daniel2

It is good to see someone who actually puts the welfare of the children above their own interests.

[bluebell]

Hey Daniel, this is a completely personal question so ignore it if you would like. I'm just wondering, do you think you'd still be a member if you were heterosexual or would you still have come to the same conclusions that you have today regardless?

[Daniel2]

Hey Daniel, this is a completely personal question so ignore it if you would like. I'm just wondering, do you think you'd still be a member if you were heterosexual or would you still have come to the same conclusions that you have today regardless?

Good question, Blue.

I'm not sure I could answer that question with any degree of certainty. My homosexuality is certainly what caused me to start questioning the things I've questioned. On the other hand, my homosexuality is what caused me to avoid questioning for so long, as well. So... answering whether or not I'd be a member if I were heterosexual (which is a great question) is sort of a "chicken or the egg?" dilemma.

One thiing is certain, to me: I've arrived at a far greater sense of inner peace about the church than I've previously felt. That isn't to say that I've returned to a literal belief in it, at all... but I'm far more comfortable in my own skin--unthreatened, personally, while simultaneously able to accept the differences of those that have opposing views on homosexuality--while sitting amongst a group of Latter-day Saints than I would have once felt. I also very much feel that, given my children's particular circumstances, it's in their best interest for me to foster and encourage as much LDS activity as I can. I feel really good about where my relationship is with the church, at the moment.

I appreciate your asking.

Daniel2

[Sky]

That’s admirable of you to attend church to support your kids, Daniel2. I hope you feel comfortable attending. Even though you no longer believe, I sense that you still have a soft spot in your heart for the Mormons, and I appreciate that about you.

Edited November 6, 2011 by Sky