Calm Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 7 minutes ago, MustardSeed said: Edited to say several. Interesting. Link to comment
MustardSeed Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 4 minutes ago, Calm said: Interesting. I don’t think I said these discussions were happening at church? Link to comment
bluebell Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 13 hours ago, Tacenda said: No, that can't be. Here in Davis County?? Yep. Link to comment
Popular Post BlueDreams Posted June 25, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted June 25, 2019 22 hours ago, Duncan said: It seems the Church has created 70 little video interviews on pornography use and the different aspects, I haven't had a chance to look at any of them but they have the Q12 and President Nelson and Oaks speaking on subjects. I guess the Church is still fighting it Many of these look similar to the ones integrated in this site: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/addressing-pornography/?lang=eng I was given the site when it was being beta tested by a bishop i worked with. I was initially skeptical because of what i’d seen in the cultural concerns (several of which have already been mentioned)....but i was pleasantly surprised. I generally like the resource. The church is generally fighting concerns and issues that compromises member’s capacity to partake in the gospel. P*rn does that and is a very prevalent concern. So they’re going to fight it. With luv, BD 6 Link to comment
BlueDreams Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 Since abuse has been brought up here too. I’d point out that the church also has a site focused on that topic as well in a similar format as the pornography one: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/get-help/abuse/?lang=eng in the resources are the numbers and sites to several abuse crisis hotlines and places to start seeking professional help. With luv, BD 4 Link to comment
Popular Post BlueDreams Posted June 25, 2019 Popular Post Share Posted June 25, 2019 9 hours ago, changed said: For every interview and "checking in" and support group that is provided for addicts - the same, and more should be provided to family members. The greatest amount of pain and heartache - the greatest amount of support needed - is for family members, not addicts. I know i’ve mentioned this before. But that’s easier said than done and assumes the family members want these resources. My problem as a therapist who very much wants to work with the spouse as well when I have an addict in my office, is that the said spouse doesn’t want to come in. Often they see this as their partner’s issue, or they don’t want to deal with the problems it’s caused in themselves, or they don’t fully recognize that it has. Not all the time. Here and there i do meet a partner who is well differentiated from the other and doesn’t take a big effect from their partner’s compulsions. But that’s fairly uncommon. I, their bishop, friends, even their addict spouse may suggest seeking therapy or support groups for themselves. But we can’t exactly push them into it. Also something that is bothering me. You’ve used “addict” and “abuser” interchangeably. This isn’t the case. Most addicts are not abusing a spouse or child. And for that matter, many of the abusers i have had in my office aren’t addicts. There are people who are both, definitely. But one does not warrant the other is happening. Also some of the solutions i’m seeing (not just from you) are oversimplified. When working with either addicts or abuse situations, I don’t have a one-size-fits-all methodology. There are things that are generally needed. Such as boundaries if they’re enmeshed or codependent. Or safety plans if there’s abusive patterns. But sometimes ideals aren’t exactly ideal. For example if there’s a person being abused and I tell them to kick out their partner, it may feel empowering, but i may have inadvertently left them in a vulnerable state. Their partner knows where they live, how to reach them, and already shows a predisposition to breaking boundaries and social norms. At any time their abuser could return to their house and if this partner was physically violent, the other may be at serious risk of harm. Likewise if i tell the partner to think about leaving their abuser sooner than they’re ready to contemplate it, i may end up seeing them leave me or other healthy resources instead to block out the unwanted advice. When a crisis hits, they’re now more isolated and compromised than if I’d worked with them in their marriage as is. For the record: I don’t work usually with current physical abuse. Usually it’s working through the ramifications of previous abuse or concurrent emotional abuse patterns. With luv, BD 8 Link to comment
Robert F. Smith Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 8 hours ago, The Nehor said: ....................... Well, actually there is. It is just not spoken about much and while I would not say anything is impossible I doubt it often comes close to conversion. The Second Anointing? Maybe, but one hears very little about it these days. 8 hours ago, The Nehor said: This depends a lot on the individual. I knew a guy with severe ADHD who was, to all appearances, addicted to cocaine and some other stuff. He hated the stuff but cocaine mitigated the symptoms and made him functional. Once he got switched over to prescription medication that could let him function without the high and side effects he was never tempted again. I have seen similar transformations with alcoholics. I do agree though that generally a former addict might be more tempted but then again, they also know the pain that can attend that choice better then someone who has never used. So not sure.................... Yes, and we do have Navy pilots who are deliberately given methamphetamines when necessary to keep them awake and alert on long missions. The risks are well understood, akin to those suffered by patients who must have an opiate in an ER or ICU in order to kill the pain. Sometimes things go badly for such individuals later. Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 23 minutes ago, Robert F. Smith said: The Second Anointing? Maybe, but one hears very little about it these days. Yes, and we do have Navy pilots who are deliberately given methamphetamines when necessary to keep them awake and alert on long missions. The risks are well understood, akin to those suffered by patients who must have an opiate in an ER or ICU in order to kill the pain. Sometimes things go badly for such individuals later. I was thinking more “Calling and Election made sure”. I do not mean to minimize the danger. I am currently on amphetamines for treatment of a long-standing difficulty that I only recently figured out what it was. The stuff scares me a bit and I know enough chemistry to know how close the stuff is to common street meth (though of course in lower doses and with a safer delivery method). When I first got the prescription I made the decision that unless it was life-changingly amazing I would stop taking it. It was amazing and life changing so now I am kind of stuck with it. 1 Link to comment
Tacenda Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, The Nehor said: I was thinking more “Calling and Election made sure”. I do not mean to minimize the danger. I am currently on amphetamines for treatment of a long-standing difficulty that I only recently figured out what it was. The stuff scares me a bit and I know enough chemistry to know how close the stuff is to common street meth (though of course in lower doses and with a safer delivery method). When I first got the prescription I made the decision that unless it was life-changingly amazing I would stop taking it. It was amazing and life changing so now I am kind of stuck with it. I'm going to get kicked in the teeth for mentioning this once again, but honestly believe it could help far better than the near meth. Don't hate me, but it is called cannabis, haha. I recently came across the person that gets his from this company based in Lehi Utah, that makes it water soluable with very little THC. The website that I've mentioned on the CBD thread is, Brizo Pure. If you're interested I can share who helped me buy it for my husband, totally legal, but you need to have a distributer help you buy it, which I know sounds like MLM to the max. But I will let you know how well it helped my husband when the month is up. On their website there are some stories of how it helped them. Edited June 25, 2019 by Tacenda Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 1 hour ago, Tacenda said: I'm going to get kicked in the teeth for mentioning this once again, but honestly believe it could help far better than the near meth. Don't hate me, but it is called cannabis, haha. I recently came across the person that gets his from this company based in Lehi Utah, that makes it water soluable with very little THC. The website that I've mentioned on the CBD thread is, Brizo Pure. If you're interested I can share who helped me buy it for my husband, totally legal, but you need to have a distributer help you buy it, which I know sounds like MLM to the max. But I will let you know how well it helped my husband when the month is up. On their website there are some stories of how it helped them. While I appreciate the thought I doubt it would be that effective. There is anecdotal evidence it could help but a lot more anecdotal evidence that it does not help or does not help as well as prescription medication and I question how much it helped in the former. I suspect it can relieve the symptoms but is that relief with impaired mental functioning? If so I do not want it. Plus cannabis is illegal in my state and that is not likely to change soon. I also prefer a pill to vaping or smoking, both in general and because I would need a dose some time during the work day. 2 Link to comment
Tacenda Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 (edited) 46 minutes ago, The Nehor said: While I appreciate the thought I doubt it would be that effective. There is anecdotal evidence it could help but a lot more anecdotal evidence that it does not help or does not help as well as prescription medication and I question how much it helped in the former. I suspect it can relieve the symptoms but is that relief with impaired mental functioning? If so I do not want it. Plus cannabis is illegal in my state and that is not likely to change soon. I also prefer a pill to vaping or smoking, both in general and because I would need a dose some time during the work day. This is legal in all 50 states because it doesn't have the full spectrum or the THC, it's like .03 percent. But I understand, it will take some time to really believe in this stuff. Edited June 25, 2019 by Tacenda Link to comment
Damien the Leper Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 20 hours ago, The Nehor said: You do know that no one is required to watch all 70 videos right? I couldn't put myself through the torture of watching more than half of one video. Link to comment
ERMD Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 9 hours ago, MustardSeed said: Some people in the church tend to call anyone who has master bated more than a handful of times an addict. Can we talk about how ridiculous that tendency is? How shaming it is and how much serves to perpetuate repetition? The best thing therapy can do for spouses and families is teach them it’s not about them. Sorry, but ..."anyone who has masturbated a 'handful' of times?" 😄 3 Link to comment
Damien the Leper Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 1 hour ago, ERMD said: Sorry, but ..."anyone who has masturbated a 'handful' of times?" 😄 Someone had to do it. Lol! Masturbation isn't even a sin. How can a person make love to another if they can't even do it to themself. Religious sexual "ethics" where only humans are concerned are a lesson in absurdity. Link to comment
pogi Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 (edited) 32 minutes ago, Valentinus said: How can a person make love to another if they can't even do it to themself. If you really want me to, I can explain the biological mechanisms... Quote Religious sexual "ethics" where only humans are concerned are a lesson in absurdity. I'm not clear what you mean by that. Can you explain? Surely you would agree that there are human sexual acts that would be considered unethical and immoral., right? Edited June 25, 2019 by pogi 1 Link to comment
MustardSeed Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 51 minutes ago, Valentinus said: Someone had to do it. Lol! Masturbation isn't even a sin. How can a person make love to another if they can't even do it to themself. Religious sexual "ethics" where only humans are concerned are a lesson in absurdity. You don’t have any more authority to determine what’s a sin any more than you believe that the church has authority to say it is. Personally I think too much of anything is a real legit problem, regardless if you believe M will be punishable by God 1 Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 3 hours ago, Tacenda said: This is legal in all 50 states because it doesn't have the full spectrum or the THC, it's like .03 percent. But I understand, it will take some time to really believe in this stuff. Why should I believe in it? Marijuana is not a miracle cure drug you can take for anything and has only been shown to be helpful in a few cases. Many doctors will not prescribe it even where it is legal because the data is just not there. The argument is that once the FDA does testing (cannot because federal law still stamps it as illegal) we will find all kinds of medical uses. That is putting the conclusion before the evidence and the evidence we have is not promising. In addition marijuana is fully legal in many European countries and has been studied and the results are not promising. The first longer term studies are coming out and marijuana is now being tied to later increased risk of mental illness and psychosis. This led to a debate over whether it was a cause or whether people prone to developing these illnesses are drawn to marijuana. The most damning evidence against it is that psychosis cases have been increasing in European nations since legalization. Correlation is not necessarily causation but it does point a finger and indicates you should “look over here”. The effect on the developing teenage brain has been shown to be negative. Then there are the pregnancy risks. Then you have the concerns about lung damage from smoking or inhaling it. Tests done on medical marijuana in the US routinely find that the description of what is in it are often wildly off in terms of quantity. In Europe the amount of THC in medical marijuana has been climbing for some time. The phrase “evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the last days” springs to mind. I ran a search and found the stuff you are talking about and looked at their batch reports. I do not see it helping at all except as a placebo. It is so diluted only a dedicated believer in homeopathy (a repeatedly disproven pseudoscience) could think it would help with anything. The best that can be said of it is that it is unlikely to hurt anyone except of course for their bank account balances. I sometimes wonder if we are hell bent on wanting to irrationally believe in magical herbal cures and snake oil we should just say that tap water cures and/or mitigates the symptoms of everything. It is not true at all but it least it won’t cost people anything to try it and if we can convince them they will get the placebo effect. 2 Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 1 hour ago, Valentinus said: Someone had to do it. Lol! Masturbation isn't even a sin. How can a person make love to another if they can't even do it to themself. Religious sexual "ethics" where only humans are concerned are a lesson in absurdity. I am not sure if it is or not but if it is a sin it is a minor one. Coupling it with porn makes it serious. We are going to start seeing the fallout of heavy high speed Internet porn use soon. I am doubtful it will look good. 1 Link to comment
Calm Posted June 25, 2019 Share Posted June 25, 2019 Tacenda is focusing on CBD oil, not marijuana. 2 Link to comment
Hamba Tuhan Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 30 minutes ago, The Nehor said: We are going to start seeing the fallout of heavy high speed Internet porn use soon. I am doubtful it will look good. It already doesn't look good. A member of our ward is a psychologist with an international counselling practice that focuses on sexual dysfunction. She says that she has numerous clients who have completely lost the ability to experience sexual arousal or pleasure in a normal (i.e. non-virtual) setting, and many of them are approaching their limits even in the most extreme virtual settings. Of course, this is only the leading edge of the coming wave. A group of university psychologists here have raised the alarm on the swelling number of young men now being professionally treated for body-image issues. It's one of the great ironies that, as a society becomes increasingly sexualised, personal prudishness increases as well. As a consequence, the only male bodies many boys are now exposed to are their own and hyper-realistic ones online. And since real bodies almost never look like online ones, they don't know how to deal with the gap, leading to feelings of inadequacy, depression and even self-harm. Meanwhile, beyond some of the psychological issues, a gynaecologist in our largest city recently wrote an op-ed piece regarding the number of young women she is trying to help deal with 'rectal incontinence' as a result of their attempts to imitate what they and their boyfriends have been socialised by online content to believe is normal sexual behaviour. As the doctor pointed out, many of these teenage girls will live with this issue -- including the need to wear nappies of some kind -- for the rest of their lives. The seeds that were sown in the Sexual Revolution sprouted weeds, and many of us recognised that the weeds were bad, but now those same weeds are starting to bear fruits. I don't think we've seen anything yet, and I think people will have to be wilfully blind to ignore the harm this time. 4 Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 1 hour ago, Calm said: Tacenda is focusing on CBD oil, not marijuana. True, and I should have said that I believe CBD oil is even less likely to be filled with new medical applications then conventional marijuana. In fact, I planned to and thought I did. Must have forgot to add that part. Oops. Link to comment
Tacenda Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 1 hour ago, Calm said: Tacenda is focusing on CBD oil, not marijuana. That's okay, I'm fine with non belief, haha! Link to comment
The Nehor Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 30 minutes ago, Hamba Tuhan said: It already doesn't look good. A member of our ward is a psychologist with an international counselling practice that focuses on sexual dysfunction. She says that she has numerous clients who have completely lost the ability to experience sexual arousal or pleasure in a normal (i.e. non-virtual) setting, and many of them are approaching their limits even in the most extreme virtual settings. Of course, this is only the leading edge of the coming wave. A group of university psychologists here have raised the alarm on the swelling number of young men now being professionally treated for body-image issues. It's one of the great ironies that, as a society becomes increasingly sexualised, personal prudishness increases as well. As a consequence, the only male bodies many boys are now exposed to are their own and hyper-realistic ones online. And since real bodies almost never look like online ones, they don't know how to deal with the gap, leading to feelings of inadequacy, depression and even self-harm. Meanwhile, beyond some of the psychological issues, a gynaecologist in our largest city recently wrote an op-ed piece regarding the number of young women she is trying to help deal with 'rectal incontinence' as a result of their attempts to imitate what they and their boyfriends have been socialised by online content to believe is normal sexual behaviour. As the doctor pointed out, many of these teenage girls will live with this issue -- including the need to wear nappies of some kind -- for the rest of their lives. The seeds that were sown in the Sexual Revolution sprouted weeds, and many of us recognised that the weeds were bad, but now those same weeds are starting to bear fruits. I don't think we've seen anything yet, and I think people will have to be wilfully blind to ignore the harm this time. The endless calls to get sex out into the open and give it some fresh air and everything will sort itself out was so prevalent when I was young. How much more fresh air does it need before it normalizes again? It is also ironic that the fallout from the Sexual Revolution is teens having sex later and those same teens (and adults) having sex less frequently when they do. I just wish they had found something besides porn to replace it with. 2 Link to comment
Tacenda Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 Saw this on the news tonight. BYU study that viewing pornography increases unethical behavior at work. https://www.newswise.com/articles/viewing-pornography-increases-unethical-behavior-at-work Link to comment
Damien the Leper Posted June 26, 2019 Share Posted June 26, 2019 6 hours ago, pogi said: If you really want me to, I can explain the biological mechanisms... I'm not clear what you mean by that. Can you explain? Surely you would agree that there are human sexual acts that would be considered unethical and immoral., right? Of course. Consensual acts are moral. The absurdity arises when someone tries to equate a consensual sexual relationship with that of an unethical sexual relationship or some type of sexual act outside human/human activity. 1 Link to comment
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