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Nehor Rants About Online Dating


The Nehor

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45 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

My divorced brother-in-law can't seem to find the right one despite going with a huge group either hiking, repelling, snow shoeing, sledding after the hike up, nearly every weekend and volley ball once  week, and he's in his fifties. I guess the women that are single as well in this group don't seem to want to settle down as much, there might be a few that do. It may or may not be generational. I know my BIL Gary does have a few needs such as a wife putting up with his love of hunting and needing certain hunting things on the wall, because the last serious relationship he had, the woman didn't want his stuff on the wall in the living room and Gary dropped her that fast! So it's a give and take situation. It's probably easier to marry if you're young and don't get too set in our ways, don't know. 

Perhaps, but I was surprised by love at age 64, and I didn't even have to look hard.  Sometimes I think there are young people out there who are too set in their ways.  And too picky.

Gary needs to find a woman who likes to hunt, then.  I know they exist, but they are probably a bit hard to find, despite a rise in numbers.  He should have a look at Female Hunters of America.  Here's a 2013 article on USA Today about how the numbers of female hunters is on the rise. Finding a mate is kind of like hunting, isn't it?  Ya gotta look where the game is congregating.  Nobody hunts elephants at Huntington Beach Pier.

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2 hours ago, Stargazer said:

Perhaps, but I was surprised by love at age 64, and I didn't even have to look hard.  Sometimes I think there are young people out there who are too set in their ways.  And too picky.

Gary needs to find a woman who likes to hunt, then.  I know they exist, but they are probably a bit hard to find, despite a rise in numbers.  He should have a look at Female Hunters of America.  Here's a 2013 article on USA Today about how the numbers of female hunters is on the rise. Finding a mate is kind of like hunting, isn't it?  Ya gotta look where the game is congregating.  Nobody hunts elephants at Huntington Beach Pier.

Thanks!!

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  • 4 months later...
6 hours ago, The Nehor said:

If I sold everything I owned I could probably scrounge up a quarter million. By the time I am 55 I hope I will be able to put up a billboard like that. I won’t but I could.

I don't doubt that but I don't think you need money. You've got funny, much better than money! 😄 That's truly a way to a girl's heart.

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34 minutes ago, Tacenda said:

I don't doubt that but I don't think you need money. You've got funny, much better than money! 😄 That's truly a way to a girl's heart.

Hasn’t worked so far. My humor tends to be a little dark. Probably why.

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On 9/6/2018 at 8:28 AM, The Nehor said:

Stay tuned for more updates as I run this thing into the ground.

Current Mood: Cynically Optimistic

Nehor, even before my first wife died back in '11, I visited the Bountiful Temple and took in a session every Friday morning, as soon as my youngest was off to school.  As I sat there, taking it all in, my mind kept sticking on G-d bringing Eve to Adam, saying, in effect, "Look what I brung ya."  The following words also kept sticking in my mind:  "It is not good for man to be alone."

I had been profoundly lonely for almost three decades of married life.  That scene and those words haunted me, filled me with longing as the 20+ year decline, which saw me almost bury her at least once or twice a year, with deductibles and copays and a struggling business push me to the brink.  A few weeks before she died, when she could no longer make it down the stairs on her own power to get her weekly injections at the clinic, I visited our family GP.  I described what was going on and asked him if this was it.  He said, "Every time I saw her the last 20 years I thought it was for the last time."  We then made arrangements for her to get on hospice, since I only had the two hands and the one body.

Even before she passed, after I informed the RS presidency to let people know to come by and tell her goodbye, I got hustled by a widow in the ward, which creeped me out.  She was just there, wherever I went, changing her preferred pew to one behind where I always sat.  Ick.

But after we buried my first wife, I was filled with an overwhelming drive to find my youngest a healthy, nicer mother, even if only by proxy, and someone who would fill me with the same elation that Adam surely must have felt, and for whom, just maybe, I might strive to be a little more Captain Moroni-ish.

I put myself on Mingle, Single, and World, made lots of contacts, went on an ung-dly amount of dates, and found her online on the anniversary of my first wife's birthday on a day I was particularly peaved at her and mess she left me in.  We married a few months later after her sealing cancellation came through in one week instead of the several months we understood we were to expect:  We got engaged (which was the sine qua non of applying for the cancellation) six months before we figured to have the wedding.  When the cancellation came through so quickly, we were left to decide what to do with such a clear signal that the path had been cleared.  We married a week after Christmas, just days short of 6 months from our first encounter online.

My wife developed a whole lot of rules, mostly for her own protection (she had snagged a stalker at one point).  I was delighted.  She popped up to my "Plan B" after our first date.  Plan C knocked her down to 3rd place for a couple of weeks, then she put me in as her Plan A, just as my Plan A stopped making herself available.  My wife then asked me to do a DTR meeting, which I'd never done before, and we decided to go exclusive to discover if this thing had legs.  I gave notice to everybody I was dating or had in the hopper for future dates, cancelled all pending dates, and things accelerated faster than I would have thought possible.  And you know the result.

It can work.  Be serious.  Be careful.  Follow the safety rules.  Remember what it is that you're doing:  finding, if possible, your soul mate.

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On 5/4/2019 at 6:29 PM, Garden Girl said:

I told you Nehor... I wish I was 50 years younger 😮 (yikes)...

from the beach... GG

Well, if we are both still single when we get there I will go on a date with you as soon as we are both in the Spirit World as the age difference will not matter at that point. :) 

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22 minutes ago, The Nehor said:

Well, if we are both still single when we get there I will go on a date with you as soon as we are both in the Spirit World as the age difference will not matter at that point. :) 

Seriously Nehor... I really do hope that you will soon find someone to share your life... I know what it's like to be alone.  But for me, I have had the comfort of knowing that I'm sealed to my husband, so the aloneness has not been as painful.  At least I'm trusting that he has accepted the ordinances performed by proxy on his behalf 20 years ago...  if not, hmmm.

GG

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  • 1 month later...
On 10/26/2018 at 4:20 PM, emeliza said:

Talking to guys is just exhausting, until you meet one that can have an actual conversation that is a two way street, those are nice, just rare. 

Not everyone (guys OR gals) is a match for one's own personality.  I'm sure you've run into gals who are exhausting to talk to.  It's not so much the sex of whom you're talking to, it's who they are.  But those of your own sex can be related to more easily, in general.  IMHO.

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