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I Messed Up


Blossom

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Wow, when I converted a few years ago everyone was nice. I think the only difference they had with treating me vs the people who had always been members was to explain everything to me so I would understand why we did whatever it happened to be.

Sorry people aren't always nice to you.

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I'm sure many Mormons are suspicious of converts. There are a couple folks who never let me forget I'm not one of them and they make sure I get put in my place by letting me know I'm not a Mormon yet and saying I'm not worthy of trust because I wasn't born one and not married to one.

Yes, you're becoming aware of the harsh reality that even Mormons aren't exempt from the common pitfalls of group psychology. It's natural (though rarely desirable) to have a higher opinion of the members of our groups than of "outsiders", even though this means that we ignore the fact that we share membership in at least one group (humankind) with every other person on the planet.

When you join the Church, you may find that you are spiritually "higher" (even though I don't encourage comparisons) than several long-term members of your local Ward. Tolerance and patience towards members of our own faith is at least equally as important as tolerance and patience towards those of other faiths, and it is probably more difficult to apply.

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I'm sure many Mormons are suspicious of converts. There are a couple folks who never let me forget I'm not one of them and they make sure I get put in my place by letting me know I'm not a Mormon yet and saying I'm not worthy of trust because I wasn't born one and not married to one.

Blessings,

Blossom

Blossom

I did not say I was suspicious of converts. That I am not. What I am suspicious of is the story as told. In my 60 plus years in the church I have never seen or heard of something like you describe as happening. I just think there is more to the story. Whatever that is I don't know.

I am sure you meant nothing by your comment about being suspicious of converts and the insinuation that I am suspicious of converts but I really do not appreciate the insinuation. I have spent several of those 60 plus years in the church bringing converts to the church. Some of my fondest memories is of the time I spent with some of these people.

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I'm sure many Mormons are suspicious of converts. There are a couple folks who never let me forget I'm not one of them and they make sure I get put in my place by letting me know I'm not a Mormon yet and saying I'm not worthy of trust because I wasn't born one and not married to one.

Blessings,

Blossom

Blossom... every time I read one of your more plausible posts and start to feel more comfortable with you, suddenly you throw something like this in... are you for real? I've never heard anyone say that someone is not to be trusted because they weren't born a member nor married to one. :P;) I was not married to an LDS man either, and no one ever doubted my trustworthiness. Anyone in your ward making such a statement needs to be reported to the bishop, period.

You either have some very ignorant members in your ward who are not living the teachings of the gospel, based on things you say they say to you or have done to you... or you are highly sensitive and "hear" things filtered through your own very sensitive ears. I say this because I've never heard anyone... anyone... ever say the things that you say they do. If they do, then I ask you to forgive their ignorance and understand that they are by far the exception to what LDS are about.

All good wishes... from the beach... GG

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I'm sure many Mormons are suspicious of converts. There are a couple folks who never let me forget I'm not one of them and they make sure I get put in my place by letting me know I'm not a Mormon yet and saying I'm not worthy of trust because I wasn't born one and not married to one.

Blessings,

Blossom

As you have seen from the other posts, you are not seeing typical mormon behavior from these people

I'm a new convert myself and have never been told or felt I wasn't trusted beyond the obvious:

- my callings are limited by my priesthood (still Aronic)

- I've never been to the temple (must wait for 1st year)

Clearly the ward members will trust their life long friends to a greater extent than their new friends, but that is just human nature.

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I am sure there are those who accept converts. I am just saying that I have seen a few things that made me trip, but so far I haven't fallen. Some are suspicious. It's kind of a bugger being new.

It's an interesting journey. Not only are you finding a new way of life (this is more than a religion) but you find yourself in a new and different way through the Gospel.

You really go through some major different thought processes. And let's face it and be real....some members can be a bit difficult but when 98 % of these folks are great.....now you found a home.

Home teachers keep coming by to spend time with us. Our dear missionaries are right here. My neighbor, and many folks from the Church come by and visit.

I got a calling!

I see my mistakes. I have dwelt too much on the negative stuff -- I just threw all that out. Yes, I know, it doesn't change anything because what happened happened. Oh, well, nothing is ever perfect, right?

Right now I can't please anybody, I think....but I'm trying to be better.

I just know in my heart this is the true Church and maybe I've been a bugger and maybe I have been judgmental and impossible, but I am trying to fix that before baptism.

This Church has also opened my eyes to those who are mentally ill. There's a lesson -- imagine having limited or no control of your mind. That scares the poo out of me.

But anyway, for a convert....I do have to say I am treated so well for the biggest part. I am happy.

I never knew life could be so good.

Blessings,

Blossom

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Hello Blossom...

It is great to hear your feelings about the Church... I love it too...

My experience is that with investigators/converts, we are more likely to love them to death... A few years ago when they had "stake missionaries," I served a two-year mission in my ward area as a complement to the regular sister missionaries. The people we brought to church as investigators were warmly welcomed and fellowshipped... if/when they converted they became part of our ward family and were shown much love and respect. That is what I base my experiences on...

I wish you well in your journey.

GG

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I think wherever there is any gathering of people, you might find a few difficult ones. It's part of being human.

I would bet in any neighborhood, workplace, church, club or group, you have all kinds of people, and that's where one of the things I am learning comes in:

Love.

Pure and simple, love. I choose to love everyone in my new Church. However, I will admit this: Sometimes those one or two difficult folks can be hard to love, but I am learning that no matter what, I must find it in my heart to love them. This is where God helps me.

A stake missionary? Wooooooo! They don't do that any more? I never heard of it; I'll have to ask. I like that! Why did they quit that? What happened?

Ack....more questions. My poor, dear, patient missionaries and home teachers. Imagine having me in your ward. Yikes! Aren't you guys lucky? LOL!

Again, it's not knowing the workings of the Church. Right now I just think the Gospel and getting my heart, soul, and head straight are the priorities. I must say, I wish I had been brought up in the Church.

Oh, and bad news about my new friend who is mentally ill....I'll post what happened in another thread, since it is a different topic but she went off her medication again and is in jail tonight. My heart hurts for her.

Thanks for listening!

Blessings,

Blossom

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A stake missionary? Wooooooo! They don't do that any more? I never heard of it; I'll have to ask. I like that! Why did they quit that? What happened?

Missionary work used to fall under the responsibility of the Stake, there was a Stake Mission President, and Ward members were called as Stake Missionaries to serve in their own wards.

A few years ago, missionary work was placed under the responsibility of the bishops and branch presidents. The Stake Mission President has been replaced by a high councillor in charge of missionary work, and the calling of Stake Missionary has been replaced by Ward Missionaries. It's just a shift in responsibility, the calling is actually nearly identical.

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I'm wondering why you think that you were the one who messed up? Surely you must know that it would never be acceptable to slap someone over potatoe salad?

No, you got it all wrong. See there was onions in the potato salad.

Any way I agree. Who ever slapped you (Blossom) they were wrong to do so. You should not feel guilt. My wife hates onions but she would never slap some one over that.

This is a bizzare story and I can't say that I have heard of it before. Not even in West Virigina did I see behaviour like this.

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Blosson, you might want to read the Encyclopedia of Mormonism. http://www.lib.byu.edu/Macmillan/ It has short explanations of many historical things and doctrines. It was sanctioned by the Church, though it is now at least a decade old.

And if you want to find out church policies on most everything, you can read the Church Handbook of Instruction at http://lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church?lang=eng and watch the training sessions on it from last November and last week. (You might have to wait until you are a member and get your membership number to get access to lds.org.)

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