Born and raised LDS, married in the Temple...the whole 9 yards. Well....except I like to drink, sometimes socially, other times to "make things go away". My husband and I started on a vacation 17 years ago, and justified that since it was out of the country....we went every other year, came back, prayed for forgiveness and moved on. But in the last 2-3 years we have become far more involved. We can go 4-5 months and then binge for 2 weeks. Then we set a new time frame and start over. We don't go to the Temple because we feel that we shouldn't. So here is the thing...our recommends are 3 days from expiring and the counselor is bugging us to schedule. STUCK! TO be clear, neither of us have an issue with doctrine, Joseph Smith or Priesthood....or any of the other usual things. We have always clung to our faith. So what we have in a sense going on, is that we want our cake and to eat it too. The dilemma is what to do about the counselor. If we don't go within a certain time for a renewal, we hit the Bishops radar...if we get called in, he's going to want to know why. I am not ready to come clean, I don't want help. But I don't want to lie in a sacred interview. To add to the mix, we are going to Europe and plan on drinking a lot of wine. Later this year another vacation where we will be drinking a lot. If you are wondering, no, it's not alcoholism on either side...it's that binge thing. We hold out and then binge in our "off" time. Knowing that we have no intention of quitting this year...I feel I am stuck with 2 choices. First, come clean to the Bishop, and deal with consequences, such as being removed from our callings (we have limited our other activities such as Temple and off and on with Sacrament) OR we lie...(it's hard to write that). If we just get through those interviews, we are off anyones radar while we continue to seek our way through this mess we made. I want the whole Eternity thing. My husband is more of a closed book and can't say what he wants. He wants me...for ever, but he is hurt by the church....I should say WE are hurt by people in the church...their cultural stupidity and not doctrine.. Our 4 children have all opted out, my husband says "if they aren't going to be there, why would I work so hard to be there" of course he doesn't mean that about me. So it's complicated. We know the people aren't true, but the church is. But boy can they do damage. So I am looking for thoughts. Ps, anyone know how to ask the counselor for time without it going on the Bishops agenda?