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Everything posted by MustardSeed

  1. MustardSeed

    Linear growth in church membership

    It is my understanding *****no cfr here****that religion in general is losing its appeal. At youth conference one of the speakers mentioned a trip to Europe and how sparse the attendance was in cathedrals and how most of not all attendees were elderly. ***no cfr To me, sad.
  2. One of the most interesting discussions our Sunday school has had over the years was about 15 years ago when our teacher brought up the idea of buffet style religion. Take what works for you leave what doesn’t behind. He was of course being critical but I have thought about the concept many times since. I am starting this topic because it has always interested me and I personally Find this discussion as the framework of the “left hand” discussion here on this site. I’m curious to know about peoples honest self reflections regardless of your Agenda here on this Board or your identity on this board. First I will share mine. I’ve been an active member my entire life at 50 years. I’ve held a temple recommend since I was 12. I consider myself a rule follower. However I am known to also be a very deep thinker beyond the box in all areas of life, church not with standing. Since I was a very young child I have observed the differences between gospel and culture. I have recognized for myself that there is a difference between doctrine and opinion. This began with a wise seminary teacher who would clarify before every opinion that what he was sharing was the Gospel according to him As opposed to Doctrine. When I read the words of church authorities and I listen to conference I have deep respect for the office and the responsibility. These men do not make me angry nor do I get defensive. That’s just me, I don’t expect the same from anybody. Everybody has their own story and the right to their experience in my opinion . There are however times when I feel the need to commune with God and ask how or if these things apply to me and there are times when in fact I have walked away with peace of mind knowing that I know what God wants for me and that my interpretation of what The authority has said or written does not match what God wants for me. The authority I speak of maybe anything from the Prophet Right on down to my ministering teacher. Or to my husband.And for what it’s worth to everybody waiting to Pounce I see my husband is having equal Authority to me. If you are willing I would love to have an honest conversation about our humanness. None of us are perfect and I do believe that Many of us do approach the gospel in A buffet style Way. There are several members here on this board who clearly are protective of the gospel. I admire that. I also am a protector in Many ways.At first glance it seems as though no matter what and authority says it will be protected as the word of God by many people here. I’m curious how far down the line of authority should One go before they start to ask questions regarding if what is being taught and directed is of God or whether it is opinion.? Answering this question leaves people vulnerable so I might be asking unfairly in a way that puts people in a Situation easy to be attacked here on this board. My question is, where do you as an individual give yourself permission to ask Whether and authority is speaking from God or speaking from his own Opinion? And if all things said by general authorities or even if all things said just buy the prophet Come from revelation, how far down the line of authority do you give permission to yourself to consider it might be opinion? I would assume that if everything that all the authorities say comes from God, Including local authorities.... Then there are only two options since there is no way to do all things correctly and live righteously and all things. I’m interested in the thought process when making a decision that goes against the words of authorities. I’m not sure if I’ve made myself clear if I have not I’ll return to this tomorrow.
  3. Off topic, but did you know (care?) that Steve Young did not serve due to crippling anxiety? CFR My Life Behind The Spiral, autobiography. I believe ***opinion*** that rampant anxiety today is due to helicopter parenting which sends the message to the child that they are incapable , thereby undermining self confidence and resilience.
  4. MustardSeed

    All-you-can-eat religion, Buffet style

    Thank you for responding. I too think it’s not ok to degrade or demean- anyone, for that matter. This site is pretty fairly respectful compared to the others I passed by to get here, but opinion on that is obviously subjective and relative.
  5. It is a grim reality that we often choose not to deal with because it is so terrifying.
  6. MustardSeed

    All-you-can-eat religion, Buffet style

    When I was in kindergarten, i recall my parents sitting me down and explaining that the prophet said no more Coke. I was a big deal to us because my grandfather was a coke bottler. At that age I referred to coke as The Devils Drink. When I became an adult I saw it with different eyes. It felt to me like an opinion. At girls camp 5 years ago several yw were playing face cards in their tent and the camp director stormed in and raised Cain over it. Girls were crying and whatnot... the stake presidency counselor was fortunately there and Told the director to stand down. I don’t think I had ever followed that directive, but evidently The Director saw it differently. Our stake president 10 years ago came to our ward and taught us about sexual sin. He directed us to check our partners cell phones regularly for indescretions and to discontinue all youth sleepovers. In my house, we saw these directives as opinions and we do what works for us. I was told by someone that they had had a spiritual visitation that suggested another child wanted to come into our family. Nope. My husband was recently asked to fill a calling at church that he is literally unqualified for. The person calling him told him he’d been inspired to call my husband. He’d have been embarrassed if my husband had told him the reality of his qualifications. I really don’t tolerate manipulation. I’m sensitive to it, and it makes me angry. Sometimes I can tell immediately when people want something so they credit God with the directive, and I dislike that. Sometimes I think people have the best of intentions but can’t discern between Gods direction and their own. And sometimes it’s God thing. I sometimes can’t tell without study and prayer. But I Suspect there are many who take every word from every (?) leader as Gods word. ****I do not have facts to back, this is opinion and personal experience ****.
  7. MustardSeed

    A Story about healing.

    For the record I’d leave it alone.
  8. MustardSeed

    A Story about healing.

    ::(. It never feels good to feel unwelcomed
  9. MustardSeed

    A Story about healing.

    If it pleases you, post. People who don’t like stuff can pass. There’s someone for everyone.
  10. MustardSeed

    All-you-can-eat religion, Buffet style

    Have you ever had the experience of weighing and measuring a leaders directive and coming to a decision that you need or can go another way?
  11. MustardSeed

    All-you-can-eat religion, Buffet style

    Hm. You may be right I’ve tried so hard to be careful to be clear about what is CFR worthy and what is my experience. I blew that for sure.
  12. MustardSeed

    Missionaires allowed to call home weekly

    I’m stunned and thrilled. !
  13. MustardSeed

    All-you-can-eat religion, Buffet style

    Thank you for all of your thoughts. As I read through (waded through) the Left Hand thread I thought to myself that near 20 pages was not about the left or right but rather about the black and the white. Its nice to know that I’m not alone in the ways I think and embrace the church. Sometimes the noisy voices of “everything a leader says is God’s directive” sounds really loud here and to those voices I wonder where the lines are drawn for them, or if all leaders and all their directives are heard and internalized as gods desire. I have been told several times that “inspiration tells me that you need to” marry me, have another kid, do this, do that... in my mind these words are the worst kind of manipulation. The absolute worst. Sometimes people have or think they have a tremendous amount of power and I just really think that every man or woman is just human. I’m ok with that, even though as a young person I thought differently . I have deep respect for my leaders. I even still respect the office of POTUS . But I do choose what I will believe and follow. I think that is a good thing- keeps me from pouncing on the errors.
  14. MustardSeed

    Mike Stroud anyone?

    My friend, who struggles in life, has found respite in the spoken words of Mike Strouds podcast on the Fullness of the Atonement. I listened for a bit but was uncomfortable with it so looked into the speaker and discovered that in 2017 he’d been reprimanded by the church. I can’t tell if the podcast I heard was originally released before his reprimand or what but I wondered where stroud landed? I don’t want my friend following some rogue whackado without knowing it.
  15. MustardSeed

    Left Hand

    I Don’t know what pleases God or what doesn’t please God regarding sticking things in the body but I cannot for the life of me understand why piercings and tattoos are such a focus where plastic surgery( which seems far more invasive ) seems to be not only ignored but rather popular. For the record, none of it troubles me, I’m live and let live with body altering. My ears are pierced and right now I’m sporting some pretty fine fake fingernails and some gnarly eyelashes. Since it doesn’t make any logical sense, it goes in one ear and out the other. I suppose that means that I don’t take as seriously Every word Spoken by and authority. So yes when the authorities speak I pray on it and ponder on it and decide for myself.
  16. MustardSeed

    Left Hand

    Ok I know someone who at every social event for work drinks milk in a clear glass so that there’s no question that they are not drinking alcohol. Thats not my style but it’s his. Live and let live. I am curious, if Oaks preaches NO TATS and you the disillusioned get upset , whereas I The active shrug my shoulders ... I wonder if that means that I am less faithful than expected from an active member. I really don’t care about tattoos and piercings. I don’t care much that other people care, nor do I care if someone sports tattoos or piercings. I don’t have any myself, but it seems to me to be a divider where often the divide is unneeded. So many righteous people out there with tattoos , I just can’t be accusatory. We have bigger problems imo. Oaks - I really wouldn’t want to hang out with him, but I don’t get particularly concerned with his focus. He is just a man. Just like everyone else, with his lens affecting his focus. I respect his leadership but don’t get particularly hung up on the details. Maybe that makes me a sinner but I’m comfortable in the color. Don’t need black and white.
  17. My *opinion* from my experience is that from a religious lens we see man as redeemable. That is after all the mission of the church, to bring all men unto Christ. Our focus is on the sinner. In these cases, yes, the victim can feel pretty disregarded and forgotten. Even blamed. Not always , obviously.
  18. Well I suggest you watch it alone lest you should want a witness to you shouting profanities at your screen.
  19. I was unable to attend church today, so I want extra oomph for my family's study. I got great nuggets in Sunday school last week that I shared, and my child was really into the things I was able to share at home. I'm hoping for more thoughts today from my surrogate Sunday school LOL - Today my takeaway from today's study are these things: Christ could have easily turned the rock to bread. I cannot imagine the temptation of food, after fasting 1 day much less 40. But it would have required divine power to change the rock to bread, and Christ never acted outside the will of the Father. It would have been self serving to change the rock to bread. The saviors mission was outlined in Luke 4. I'm also reminded that praying and fasting fervently are useful not just when facing trials, but preceding trials. Christ was prepared before he was tempted. Anything else that anyone can add? I know there's much more, but I'm interested in what interests you. Thank you
  20. MustardSeed

    "Why some people leave the Church"

    Some people (well, members of the church if Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) use the word “spiritual” to describe Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints events/Holy Ghost experiences . I think of the word spiritual much more broadly, and indeed my most spiritual experiences in my life have been at work. I have had spiritual experiences at church too but much of the moving things I’ve felt at church have to some large degree have been emotional. Many have been indeed spiritual. When I miss church I miss more than spiritual experiences. I miss the connection and routine to my identity as a member of the church. That cannot be replicated in nature. But absolutely nature is a spiritual place for me too!
  21. I don’t think an offender should be disallowed callings “ever again”. But I don’t think they should ever be in primary scouts youth or camp callings.
  22. I think I've used the terms consistent with your terminology.
  23. A lot of things put people in the category of child molester. If an 19 year old has sex with his or her 17 year old partner in the US then he or she is a sex offender, but "not necessarily" a pedophile. If you have a person who has fondled a child sexually, once or more than once, ideally they should be first prosecuted - and then, church disciplined, and then not in any position to hurt another child. Since we can't control for all things, because situations present themselves at church that leaves children vulnerable - ideally, we would teach our kids to protect themselves - and since we know that kids can be taught but will still be manipulated by intent perps, we need to understand that we need to trust to only a certain point and beyond that know that just because people are members of the same church as us they don't necessarily think the same way, believe the same way, or act the same way.
  24. " Pedophilia" is attraction to children. Someone attracted to children doesn't necessarily commit acts. Pedophilia is widely understood to be as permanent a preference as heterosexuality or homosexuality. I'll go look for documents to support that one cannot change their attraction to children I suppose. Sigh- I'm too lazy really to look up what feels like such a widely accepted understanding but OK.
  25. I just read that article. Super sad. I am aware that this happened 25 years ago, and much has improved since then. But it is **MY OPINION** that the culture still fosters too much of an independence and closed (I know calm, we've discussed this ad nauseam) way of operating. I'm so glad we are challenging this way of thinking: "David" said the abuse was handled internally by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Police reports indicate his parents chose not to press charges. "The families are supportive of Mr. Van Wagenen in working out this problem," a police report from July 26, 1993 indicates.