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About Jane_Doe

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    Senior Member: Divides Heaven & Earth

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  1. Always be friendly and keep the door open for people. And respect a person's choice whether or not to walk through it.
  2. Yes. But we of course would was into improve understand over time.
  3. I agree that kids today are WAY over scheduled. But personally I see the need to cut back and pick from great things and the best things. And I do see getting spiritual instruction/growth to be one of the best things for a teenager, both in a structured program & personally at home. Your kid doesn't need to be at soccer practice 3 nights a week + games & piano 2 nights a week & Chinese lessons & church actives & hockey. Yes, I realize the pressure for this over-scheduling is HUGE -- people saying you need to round your kid out, it'll improve their resume for college, you need to give them opportunities, etc. But it's just too much. Cut down on a lot of those and focus on a very small number of best things.
  4. A sealing is a opportunity for individuals to be together (either spouses or parents/child). Hence all sealings are performed, hoping that those people will embrace the Gospel. Just like we do baptisms for all individuals. It is a fact that not all people will embrace the Gospel, but we still hope and do our part.
  5. I'm going to start with really important big-picture stuff here, and then I'll address your specific question. Big picture: --Remember, a person getting seal to another does NOT mean that they must be together in the eternities. Honoring a sealing is a personal choice: you and that person choose to be together. -- It is also dependent on all individuals fully embracing Christ in the eternities: surrendering their sins, walking with Him, and becoming entirely like Him. So many of the faults that seem to define us in this brief mortal life will just be gone. So a sealed relationship in the eternities is not copy-paste of what people are like today. -- In addition to everyone's character's now being like Christ (which is a complete overhaul), everyone will also be physically perfect and fit. Great grandpa is no longer this old dude you need to yell at to be heard, but an incredibly fit man to chase you around the yard. Again, a sealed relationship in the eternities is not copy-paste of what people are like today. Now on to your specific case: your father and "Sue" were married when he passed away. Therefore, Sue does have the right to seek a sealing with him. Having the sealing done will give Sue and him the *option* of being together-- they must both choose to honor their relationship and both fully embrace Christ. If in the eternities they don't want to be together, then having a sealing done doesn't force them to be together. And again, Sue and your father must both fully embrace Christ.
  6. The only stupid questions a person can ask are ones they have no interest in listening to people's answers. If you are interested in listening to the answers and learning something-- resolving your stumbling blocks, then that's a possible conversation starter. If you're not interested in listening to the answers to questions, then frankly asking them is just stupid trolling.
  7. Of course-- remembering to use the eye of study and spiritual eye of asking God. There was just a fantastic talk on this last General Conference. Now of course, as with all studying, you need to spend the time studying the basics before you'll understand the advance stuff. And there is the matter of which things are most important. If an investigator investigates, gets a huge spiritual witness and sees good things with eye of study too, then going off that information is a good thing-- you don't need to understand everything. Frankly, if we waited to understand everything, we as humans would barely do anything in this life.
  8. God said so. When talking in this context, whole scale church apostasy would being defined as complete lost of priesthood authority. There will always be a need for continuing revelation and guidance from God cause we mortals aren't perfect. An a person/group who has lost their authority from God can still love Him and have some of His truths. You individually, get on your knees and ask God. No!! Infallible would mean that this mortal sinner is 100% perfect like Christ Himself, which is simply not true. Remember: this is not the prophet's church. This is the Church of Jesus Christ. Always remember that He is your head, and you should always be in communication with Him directly. His servants supplement and help guide that relationship, not replace it. One thing I love about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is that emphasis on both. I have met some* Catholics that don't believe in approaching God at all, instead it's all about looking to mortal leaders, which makes me sad. I've met some* Protestants that make me sad when they are completely anti anything structured and do whatever the heck they want. *"Some" is a key word here. They are a minority, but they do exist. And LDS folks ain't perfect either.
  9. Of course. A Christian is a disciple of Christ. It's not determined by which pew your butt warms Sunday morning. Yes, having your butt warm *a* pew and being present (not just in body, but in entirely) does tend to help a person become a better disciple of Christ. Being present at a pew where purer truth is being taught helps even more. Same with reading your scriptures, making covenants with Him, etc.
  10. The reason I know that the secular security guys routine areas is because they knock on MY car (I am a married mother in my 30's, not remotely a teenager).
  11. I live in a area that's very liberal (not remotely Christian dominated), and local secular security will do this particularly around teenage hang-out spots. And they find things that mandate them to keep doing these patrols.
  12. Remember: those very young 11 year olds undoubtedly have likely have peers in their class that are dating, watching porn, talking about sex, and probably a few that are actively having sex. The world nowadays is hyper-sexualized and kids need to be educated about what's right/the Lord's way and what's not. They need education to arm themselves. Another thought: sending out an email to the parens with "hey, this is the topic for X, just wanted to let you know. You (the parents) are welcome to attend and we would encourage you to talk about this stuff with your kids because it is very important". I do like the power angle very much.
  13. Boys: you are responsible for your own thoughts/actions. If there's a girl half naked dancing on a stripper pole intentionally provocative, you are still responsible for your own thoughts/actions. Hence at points you'll need to really excesses self control / move away from temptation. (All of this applies to girls too). Everyone does need to be taught that their actions do affect others (in many ways) and makes it harder for them to have self control. But that is a separate conversation and does not belong in the consent conversation. A very common error of mixing these two VERY different conversations: you create the false picture "well, she dressed slutty, she must have wanted sexual attention, and it was ok that I just gave it to her cause she didn't say 'no' and her outfit said 'yes' ". Or "well, it's my fault he came after me because of how I was dressed." Hence why you keep the conversations COMPLETELY separate. Consent in the consent conversation. Taking self-care and sending the message you intend to gets it's own conversation.
  14. So the topic here is consent. And yes, it is very complex. It really doesn't have much to do with Ogle, as you'll hear that exact same view in many venues (religious or not), it isn't extreme at all. The legal definition of "assault" varies, and does blend into legal "sexual harassment" for a lot of 'lesser' things. Let's just acknowledge that move away from lawyer definitions to focus instead on humans. I apologize that my thoughts are disorganized here, so I'm just going to letter label them. -- A) You really need to talk about the whole spectrum, who may simply not realize that X behavior is sexual harassment/assault/whatever term. B) When it comes to obvious physical wounds, it's intuitive to us that "if you're hurt, you need to go to the doctor". We see that variety of wounds (example: broken arm, gunshot), and send every one of them to the doctor. You don't see people comparing wounds and going "well, I only broke my arm, I don't really need to go to the doctor, that guy who go shot should go to the hospital and I'll stay home". NO! Such is just stupid. Yes, the gunshot guy is more dramatically than the broken arm gal, but they are both hurt and both need to go to the doctor. And yet when it comes to sexual harassment/assault, we metaphorically do that exact thing! "Oh, we only did X, he didn't do Y, I wasn't really wounded." NO! Such is just stupid. Wounded is wounded. What is wrong is wrong. All wounds need treated (dramatic and not), and using ill-founded comparisons to talk ourselves out of acknowledging that is just stupid. C) Stress that perpetrators and victims can be any gender. The most common perpetrators (especially among teens) is somebody that person is dating or otherwise knows well. D) Consent for anything is EXPRESSLY needed. The end. E) It doesn't matter what she/he was wearing. It doesn't matter if they flirted. If doesn't matter that you thought they wanted it. Unless they explicitly give consent for X, then pursuing X is crossing the line and wrong. F) Address what to do if someone crosses that line. G) Hammer home the fact that nothing is ever the victim's fault. Hammer that over and over again.
  15. I don't think that checking papers & check marks is a good metaphor for describing a relationship with God. Let's go with a different one instead-- There is a huge party celebrating Christ. All praises being given to Him, everyone there is following in His ways, all the false ideas/habits/sins/etc are just done away with, and all the celebrating guests have taken on HIs name. This taken on His name isn't just a surface thing, but a formal process facilitated by His servants wherein the old sinner died and this new disciple was born. These new disciples in turn grow up to becomes priests and servants of the Lord themselves. No one is forbidden from coming into this party. It's not a matter papers being check or anything like that. In fact, Bob can come to the party. But Bob... he's not too sure of this whole thing. yeah, Christ is cool and all that, but... Bob doesn't want his old/current self to die-- he likes who he is, sins and all. He doesn't want to be take or Christ's name or reborn or have any servant of Christ come near him-- he doesn't need anyone else! So, it's not very long before Bob just leaves the party-- this is not a happy place for him. He is much happier in a place that better fits him, even if it is a much smaller glory.
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