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      Contact Us Broken   09/27/2016

      Users, It has come to our attention that the contact us feature on the site is broken.  Please do not use this feature to contact board admins.  Please go through normal channels.  If you are ignored there then assume your request was denied. Also if you try to email us that email address is pretty much ignored.  Also don't contact us to complain, ask for favors, donations, or any other thing that you may think would annoy us.  Nemesis

bsjkki

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About bsjkki

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    Senior Member: Divides Heaven & Earth

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  1. Church updates statement on Charlotteville

    And God made Nehor and Longview who despise and condemn racism...
  2. Church updates statement on Charlotteville

    I talked to a friend today and she did not know why the church needed to come out with two statements this week against racism. She did not realize people like Ayla existed in the church and that these statements were necessary. She was horrified that there were Mormons who were white nationalists. I think this op-ed in the Deseret News will also be educational because some, because they do not see it, do not realize it exists. http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865686989/Op-ed-Speaking-to-the-pain-of-a-black-Mormon-woman.html "The last time the N-word was hurled at me was in April 2017. And yes, it was the full word. Sadly, I was angrier that the guy reset my clock than I was at being called a racial slur. Trust me, every black person distinctly remembers the last time they were called the N-word. Now, thanks to some saint with a slick tongue, it’s a frighteningly fresh wound from 2017. Oh, and if you’re wondering why I referred to him as a “saint,” well that’s the part of the verbal victimization that devastated me, he was a member of my church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints."
  3. Church updates statement on Charlotteville

    It is what the media does.
  4. ...oops missed the other thread..
  5. The church issued a statement on The Loveloud Festival being held in Utah. According to the article the “LoveLoud is about is bringing our community together to talk about how we can love our LGBTQ youth, how we can make them feel accepted and loved within the community so that these suicide rates drop,” Reynolds said, noting the increased risk of suicide among LGBTQ youth and others who feel bullied or marginalized." "http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865686887/LDS-Church-issues-statement-of-support-for-LGBTQ-concert-event.html The statement says, “We applaud the LoveLoud Festival for LGBTQ Youth’s aim to bring people together to address teen safety and to express respect and love for all of God’s children,” says a statement released by the LDS Church. “We join our voice with all who come together to foster a community of inclusion in which no one is mistreated because of who they are or what they believe." The statement continued: “We share common beliefs, among them the pricelessness of our youth and the value of families. We earnestly hope this festival and other related efforts can build respectful communication, better understanding and civility as we all learn from each other.”
  6. What to do...

    Thanks this is helpful. I love the "just because I am female doesn't mean I have to be a girl." That is where we were and that is the discussions I have had with her in the past that she seems to have accepted. This, I want to be a boy thing is new. She seems to me to be more A-sexual than anything else and I think the darn internet has influenced her to believe "not having to be a girl" means "I must be a boy." But since she does not want to date or have relationships and is not social--she only wants limited social interactions all on her terms--even with her one friend (friend of her sisters) she will only hang out for an hour or so and disappear. She doesn't relate to boys more than girls. She always hated combined Young Men/Young woman activities because the boys were too loud and crazy. Thanks you all for your responses. It has helped today.
  7. Date-onomics

    Rare...but happened to a girl home from college in my ward this summer. She had to repeatedly and forcefully tell the guy she was not interested and get her family involved to keep him away. He believes God told him they were destined to be together and the scariest part is he really believes it.
  8. Church updates statement on Charlotteville

    Well, I think our discussion thread yesterday proved some people still had room to believe white nationalist thinking was okay. I'm glad the church is taking a strong, public stance on this and leaving no room for interpretation.
  9. What to do...

    Well, my husband and I had an awesome family home evening last night going over how to talk about dangerous things with our children. https://www.lds.org/topics/pornography/audiences/parents/creating-a-safe-place-to-talk-about-dangerous-things?lang=eng&old=true We were very successful because my 19-year-old daughter told me today she wants to be a boy. Now, this isn't really a shock. She has autism and has rejected all things girly for years. Years ago, she was quite thrown in her Chinese class when a fellow autistic boy asked her if she was a boy or girl. I asked her whether she had a testimony and whether she wanted a secular or spiritual perspective on this and we discussed both. She does want to continue at church. She does not want to date. She does not want a sexual relationship and she does not want to ever get married. I told her I would not refer to her as my daughter but try to just call her by her name (it is gender neutral) but actually telling everyone at church and her siblings to call her a him and change pronouns--just a little hard at the moment. I told her we would go buy her pants for church which I had planned on anyway. I knew she would be more comfortable. Anyway--her autism is such that while she is smart and high functioning, she is also obviously very different too and we didn't know if she would ever be able to hold a full time job or support herself enough to live independently. We are working on getting a drivers license and getting a job. Do any of you know how to navigate this--her autism puts things in a different light and how do trans and church work together? I would rather gender neutralize--I think the whole calling her a him is something I am really struggling with and because her mental capacity is not like everyone else's, I'm not sure what to do.
  10. The church felt the need to clarify it's statement from Sunday even further. They are sending a clear message and I hope every Mormon hears it and if needed, changes their thinking. http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/article/church-statement-charlottesville-virginia It has been called to our attention that there are some among the various pro-white and white supremacy communities who assert that the Church is neutral toward or in support of their views. Nothing could be further from the truth. In the New Testament, Jesus said, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” (Matthew 22:37-39). The Book of Mormon teaches “all are alike unto God” (2 Nephi 26:33). White supremacist attitudes are morally wrong and sinful, and we condemn them. Church members who promote or pursue a “white culture” or white supremacy agenda are not in harmony with the teachings of the Church.
  11. Date-onomics

    As a mom, I worry less about my kids after they are married. I don't think it is bad to marry young if you meet the right person and I see no reason a girl can not finish her education if she gets married. Honestly, I would rather my daughter have a great marriage over a great career. But, I want them to be educated and if they must work, be well compensated.
  12. Affairs begin in many ways and just like looking out for predators, if your feelings about someone are in dangerous territory, the right things to do is not see them and shut those feelings down. Many years ago, in my ward at the time, two couples became friends. They did a lot together. Two members of the friendship had an affair. Two marriages were destroyed. Should couples not be friends? I am very sad for your friend. These things are devastating. My sisters street in Utah has a lot of divorces. One man ended up marrying the babysitter. These were faithful, active families so I understand the need for precautions but I would caution not to take precautions that will get you sued.
  13. Because the man was the Vice President of the construction company giving the scholarship and that is when he had time to meet with candidates? I think it might have even been dinner...does that make it worse? This is a sad but true statement. I liked this story from Vox on this issue because I remembered when the 2015 article came out about this issue on Congressional staffs. https://www.vox.com/conversations/2017/3/31/15136548/congress-sexism-mike-pence-vp-billy-graham Women are in the work force so how should these things be handled. Good managers meet one on one with employees and casual settings are even recommended. https://blog.impraise.com/360-feedback/1-on-1s-for-engaged-employees-how-good-managers-should-do-them-performance-review
  14. I think this depends on your industry and what your job is. My husband has working lunches scheduled daily with different companies, clients, architects and designers. He doesn't ask if their rep is male or female and he meets with who he needs to meet with. They meet at public restaurants. My daughter is in this male dominated business and is often alone with male co-workers on job sites. She has a performance review today with her Vice President, a Mormon bishop. Should he not meet alone with her? Do you feel they should be chaperoned? *Just wanted to add in college, she was often the only female in class and she spent a lot of time in one on one study sessions (often tutoring) Her best friend in her program was a married man. For her scholarship she met alone for lunch with a married man for her interview. My senior is in AP Physics 2. There are only 2 girls out of 19 students. She will face these numbers at college and in her career. Mentorship is very important in certain fields.
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