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readstoomuch

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About readstoomuch

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  1. Sure there can be too many of these. The difference is how local it is, how much it benefits those children to be able to give and how good it is for us as a Church/congregation to give to the community we live in.
  2. Medicaid does not usually cover the cost of seeing a patient. Rex burg does not have a large sophisticated medical system. They are probably related to these points. The counseling center struggles to see all of the people that desire to be seen at BYU-I in a similar circumstance.
  3. He is still in the regular classroom. He can speak, in fact he sometimes really speaks, but he seems to be speaking less. He goes to kindergarten half the day and gets therapy the rest. Speech, occupational therapy. I am not sure about ABA, though his mom mentioned that. He could more therapy at night, but his mom doesn't think he should and that he should just get to be a kid. In their eyes he is doing well. For us, he seems more withdrawn and just wonders the house. He actually interacts with us less. Our daughter in law seems to want us to not interfere and provide child care when his school or development center is closed. Its usually last minute and can be especially hard on my wife who may have something planned or wants to do something for herself. They really just survive minute to minute, some by their nature-thats how they have always been and some by them being separated and not paying attention to details until it is staring them in the face.
  4. Thank you. I guess in the end that is all we can say. I am sorry too and there doesn’t seem to be a way to keep someone from suffering from the consequences of their own choices. Nor does it work when you try to protect them from the consequences.
  5. My oldest son has been married for 8 years. They have a five year old with autism. They are getting a divorce. She waited for him on his mission and they got married in the temple. We didn't know that she got a hold of anti-mormon sites and people in faith crisis at BYU-I. She finished her degree, but stopped going to church at school. It got even worse when she did a one year master's degree at another institution. This was all while he was on his mission and the few months after he came home. We did know that she sent explicit pictures to him before his mission and he almost couldn't go. The bishop and stake president recommended that he stop writing to her while he was on his mission. It was actually a shock when we picked him up and his mission president mentioned that there was a special girl waiting for him. She seemed determined that she was going to marry him and we did our best to try and work with the situation. It's hard to tell your 22 year old kid how to live their life. So they went to BYU-I and went inactive almost immediately. I don't know how he got an ecclesiastical endorsement while at school or her a temple recommend and endorsement herself. There was a lot of lying and hiding things. We sort of figured this all out after they had been married a couple of years. Her mom was part of this in that she hoped that if she just married in the temple with a returned missionary that things would be okay. The mother opened up about her daughter`s faith crisis and lying. She knew about the pictures her daughter had sent, but still egged her on that she was going to marry our son. Our son had his own problems before his mission, so we were really happy when he chose to go on a mission and just wanted him to have a good experience. Just telling this all hurts quite a bit. So, they moved close to us about 6 years ago and had a baby. He is a very cute boy, but started acting aloof and not meeting your eye gaze when he was two and a half. He was diagnosed with autism and it has been a hard ride since then. They can be sweet pleasant people, but won't have anything to do with the Church. Their life just seems to have disintegrated. Our son can be lazy and self absorbed. She is manipulative and lies. They both lie and don't face hard choices and consequences until they are really bad. That's what seemed to happened to their marriage. They waited until it was really broken to do anything. It seems to be beyond repair. Now we don't see our grandson much and it is usually when they need last minute child care. He gets quite a bit of therapy, but he is regressing and becoming more withdrawn as his parents go through this divorce. They are both working parents, so he hasn't`t gotten potty trained. We worked with him and he was pretty close, but our daughter in law wouldn'`t maintain any consistency. Almost no day care or program will take a child that old that still needs his diapers taken care of. He is a huge kid, so changing him is really a two person job. I tried to talk about this with his mother and she just cries and gets defensive. My son doesn't pull his weight, so there is quite a bit on her. They could have gotten therapy to help with dealing with their son, but they kept putting it off. They can't seem to get to a support group and it just seems that our grandson isn't going to do well. We had helped support them and done quite a bit for them, but they were becoming dependent and weren`t very grateful. It seemed to be time for them to get on their own. We took away the financial support and unless we were making something for them to eat they just didn't really have much to do with us. Even then, they never helped with the dishes or really stayed around very long afterwards. Mostly disengaged and it is hard to talk to politically correct millennials who are over the top in support of social causes, especially LGBT causes. This is probably therapy as much as anything, but this all seems like it would have gone so much better if they had stayed engaged in the Church. They don't really have friends they can count on. There are a few marginally active and inactive couples they knew from BYU-I in the area, but some of them have been toxic for them. We pray for them and want to do what is the best for them. Especially our grandson. Her mother is actually the most toxic and I think she really poisons our daughter in law against our son. Not that he is innocent. This all seems like watching two cars come to an intersection and knowing they are going to crash, but there is nothing that you can do. How hard do we try to help our grandson? We can't talk about it much with his parents without them being defensive and with them both working they don't have a lot of energy to put to it. I see him once a month for an hour or so and they live fifteen minutes away. It is good to get this out, but it is so painful. I just don't know what to do and am resigned to watching it happen. My wife and I seem to care more than they do-a recurring thing in dealing with our son.
  6. So my daughter went into the MTC on Wednesday. She flew into SLC and took the shuttle down. We got the email saying to was going well and she was safe. She sounded happy. This all seems to be working out.
  7. This thread grew quickly, but I thought I would at least comment. Yes, males should be modest and females are attracted to different attributes of men depending on their tastes. When I was in high school in the 70s Angel Flight pants were these tight polyester pants that men would wear. I heard some women talk about them (in regards to butts) in a store I was in one time. That was about the same time I heard some girls talking about boys with big muscles and hair on their chests in a tank top. Unfortunately, it actually encouraged me to dress like that. Then I realized what the Lord expected of me. Of course today as I was reading through the threads I came across men running in tights or bike pants. I exercise in both, but I sure don't have to wear them every where. They are kind of like yoga pants in girls/women. The other night at the mall, I think more than half of the women were wearing yoga pants. I am a lot better at not looking at them than when I was a teenager. Yoga pants remind of the exercise tights and leotards of the 70s and 80s. They always got my attention. So, I`m a guy and it takes some real effort to not look at women, but that doesn't keep me from knowing what is expected of me.
  8. Thank you all. I have felt the prayers of many. Just when it seems discouraging and that she won't do well, it works out. Her heart softens, she has a good experience or feels better. That has been a great blessing.
  9. My daughter was reassigned to a be a Spanish speaker in California. She just found out today after reporting to the missionary department that she was having problems with Crohn`s disease. She is doing better on treatment and seems to be at peace with it all. Thought you all should know as you were pretty supportive
  10. I hate MLM. Every one has a brother or sister-in-law who does this kind of thing or comes to you with every new diet, health food, supplements, essential oils, etc. as a know it all. They are in my family. If you tell one of your family no once, it will never happen again. Word gets out. The same thing happens if you turn a family member down to loan them money. No one in the family will ask again.
  11. My daughter does indeed have Crohn`s Disease and has been on oral corticosteroids for about 5 days. She is starting to do much better. Her garments had come off because of the diarrhea and bloating. At least she wore them yesterday. Some of the positive blessings such as being diagnosed early and being at home instead of school or a mission have been brought up by her. What is surprising is how badly she wants to go on a mission, but how little she is doing as far as reading the scriptures or praying. We were going to take her to do initiatory work, but she declined to go with us. She is meeting with the stake president tomorrow. We are hoping that helps. Her name is on the temple roll and we pray for her all the time. She is a pretty petulant child right now. My wife had surgery 10 days ago, so I am the “healthy” one right now. August was a rotten month for me. Here’s to September being an improvement.
  12. Never boring around my house. My daughter was waiting to go into the MTC in mid-November. She has had abdominal problems and diarrhea for about 6-8 weeks. Right after she got her call they developed. The work up is pointing to inflammatory bowel disease such as Crohn`s or Ulcerative Colitis. A colonoscopy is scheduled for Wednesday morning. She is wondering why God would call her on a mission and then let her get sick. We don’t know if she can go on a mission or not given the circumstances. Certainly not a country without good medical care. So we are praying and she got a blessing tonite.
  13. Well, thanks every one. The meeting with my partners when much better than I thought. It’s not over yet, but I will update as to the decisions I end up making and how it goes.
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