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About Maestrophil

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    Un gars qui fait de son mieux
  • Birthday 10/18/1969

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    SugarHouse, UT

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  1. Maestrophil

    Sam Young is Excommunicated

    Bluebell said 'be against' which is not the same as disagreeing.
  2. Maestrophil

    Sam Young is Excommunicated

    I guess that depends on how public and what your tone is. I have a hard time believing, based on some of my experiences, that a sincere appeal to local leaders, an appeal in writing to the brethren (I have never been told not to contact them, and have received personal responses to some of my inquiries) - perhaps even accompanied by a petition signed by ward members worded in a faithful and humble tone, would be met with silence or reproach. If you couple that with insisting that your way is the absolute only way and/or that change needs to happen NOW - then you probably have crossed the line. I would wager that the majority of members who are resigning their membership over this have, for the most part, never even spoken to a local leader about this or taken any action at all above getting bothered enough to resign. BTW - my bishopric has always asked me if I want to be in the room with my 14 year old daughter during interviews, and my daughter says "NO WAY!" :-). And I trust the leaders we have implicitly.
  3. Maestrophil

    Sam Young is Excommunicated

    I can understand the frustration and the passion. But I do wonder if the 'being public' about it is really at the heart of it. For me Bro. Young was exed as much or more for the tone of his public statement rather than the underlying desire for change. I have been vocal in the past about my desires to have certain aspects of Church policy be approached differently, both in an in-church setting and on social media, and I never once have been warned or chastised. Of course, I never implied in any of my statements that I held the leaders of the church in contempt, that people should not joint Church over any issue, or that if my demands were not met, I would raise h#@l and/or leave the Church.
  4. Maestrophil

    Sam Young is Excommunicated

    This hurts me too. It feels like selling your birthright for a bowl of porridge to me. How much change could these saints make if they stay and unite with like minded saints in expressing faithful discomfort to leaders, serving others who are struggling, and supporting the leaders they have that are likely mostly good leaders who do not act inappropriately with their kids? That way, if and when the slow boat of the Church makes positive strides, they are still on the Good Ship. I don't begrudge anyone their choice if that is what they feel they have to do, but resignation does not seem proportionate to the situation IMO.
  5. Maestrophil

    Sam Young is Excommunicated

    I might have read the thread a bit lazily - but did no one counter this bit of information brought forth by SteveO? To me this alone is enough to start proceedings. If you amplify that by however many times Sam has made such statements publicly, then it seems like he got what he wanted, or was headed towards. Can any of his defenders help me understand why these statements are defensible? Publicly defaming the church, the brethren, and actively encouraging others not to join (which logically implies that those who are currently members would be better of leaving). None of this shows good will on the part of Bro. young to work WITH the Church for the benefit of the children IMO. Perhaps it started that way, but in light of statements like these, I cannot help but see Sam Young as someone who had purposefully placed himself in opposition tot he Church, rather than trying to affect change from within as a faithful member.
  6. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    Some very good advice! Her mother (my-ex) is disfellowshipped and inactive. My wife and I are quite happily active. 🙂 Love you too Bill!
  7. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    I agree - that is why I didn't act and upset my wife.
  8. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    Thank you all very much for your very good thoughts and especially for prayers! My wife spends a ton of time with my daughter, and they seem to really get on well - but my ex says that when she and my daughter are together that my daughter complains about my wife and I, church, rules etc. I know my ex tells her that we are too strict, the church is too demanding, and that is why she left me and the church. I feel so badly for my daughter being in such a situation. My wife still is not speaking with me today. But I still feel, like many of you have said, that causing a fuss over a one-time visit, potentially making my daughter feel awkward and resentful, and keeping her from her mom would not have been the wise or Christ-like choice. I did speak to my ex wife, and she was angry too that I would presume to want her to notify us next time she plans on attending any activities with my daughter. She went on about how my raising the kids in the church and with standards was hurting them etc. I stayed calm and explained to her my concern about our daughter's social needs at YW, and also how it would feel as a YW leader to have a parent you don't know show up uninvited to an activity (My ex was in YW presidency once). She understood and started to calm down when she saw my concern was for our daughter. She promised to let us know in the future before she attends anything like that, which is all I asked of her. I will trust the Lord to help smooth things out. Thank you again for all your help. I sometimes wish the church would address these situations that I am sure more and more members deal with with divorce so much more common now. I don't begrudge the brethren for not making it a priority - but it sometimes feels like, for all my efforts, I am a misfit.
  9. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    Very helpful advice. Thank you. Do you think I should’ve said something at the beginning and turn her mother away? As soon as I got home my wife wanted me to call my ex wife and tell her to leave the activity, but I felt that that would not create a good feeling at the activity
  10. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    I plan on it. That will involve even more prayer.
  11. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    Sort of. I am the custodial parent so the ex should technically ask or at least notify me of a visit, which I will address. The bigger question that I am asking here from a latter-daysaint perspective is, if she does ask in the future, is it ok to say no? Or should we try and be more inviting. I don’t have fears that my wife does of badmouthing us or the church, and i feel is sends a potentially unchristian message to tell someone they are not welcome at an activity.
  12. Maestrophil

    Need advice

    I am posting this here because this involves a non active member as well as myself and my wife, and I would appreciate all insights. This litterally just happened and I am kind of sick about the current position I am in and what to do. So, I drove my 14 yr old daughter to YW for a hike. My daughter, who has been very vocal about not liking YW or hikes, was not murmuring this time. On the way she says “oh, I guess my mom (my ex) is joining us. I thought it was odd but wasn’t too bothered. When i got home just now and told my wife, she got really angry and demanded I call the ex right away and tell her to go home. My wife is fearful that the ex, who is vocally anti organized church, will pull my daughter away from socializing with the other girls, and will disparage us and the church. When i refused to do that and told her I thought it would do more harm than good on many levels to tell my ex wife she was not welcome to attend our ward YW, she became furious with me and I not speaking. She wants me to “do something about it “ My questions for you are - what do I do? Is it our place as members to deny anyone who is not a danger to attend a ward activity? How can I even explain this to my ex wife in a way she would understand - and ask her to notify us if she wants to attend a ward function? Is that my place? And I also don’t want to do anything harmful to my daughter. Yet, I want to honor and please my faithful wife. All ideas are welcome - Sooner than later!!! 😩 Thanks! MP
  13. Maestrophil

    1 Hour with the 1st Presidency

    In my couple of meetings with President Nelson (3 total) - I only really had 'thank you' to say. 🙂
  14. Maestrophil

    Sacrament shooting

    Any news on a motive?
  15. Maestrophil

    Aprons of Fig Leaves and Coats of Skins

    So, according to this document, the clothes represent relying on the righteousness/grace of Jesus - having our robes washed white in His blood rather than wear our own 'coverings' for our unrighteousness. Correct? That makes sense. Thank you for the link!